Clipped by Love (Bellevue Bullies #2)

by Toni Aleo

  “That’s right, and believe me, I won’t say it again until you prove it to me.”

  “Yes sir,” I answer again. “Tomorrow will be different.”

  “It better fucking be,” he yells and I turn, getting off the ice to head to the locker room.

  My dad may be hard on me, even a bit mean, but it’s for the best. I need to be pushed, I can’t get sloppy, and if I’m honest, that’s what I was today. I’m not one of those girls who cries because Daddy is hard on me. I crave it because I’m not perfect. He told me all the time as a child that it’s okay to think of myself as a glow stick because you have to break them to make them shine. And that’s what he’s done to me. He’s broken off all the things that could hold me back and has allowed me to shine.

  I can’t let him down.

  Today though, I allowed Jayden to throw me off my game, and that can’t ever happen again. He won’t be there to support me when I’m a crying ball of mess because I don’t make the NHL. No, he’ll be playing, so why should I allow him to fuck with my game? As I fight back the tears, since disappointing my father is the one thing I refuse to do, I try to push away my nervousness. I thought the nerves were eating me up before, but as I get closer and closer to the locker room, my heart is sure to come out of my chest. I’ve never had to share a locker room with guys before, and I’m not sure what to expect.

  When I reach the door, I can hear the guys in there laughing and cutting up. Sucking in a breath, I go to push the door open, but before I can, Dad is brushing by me, slamming the door back and then entering the room, causing the guys to fall silent. Following behind him, avoiding all eye contact, I go to the spot by the door that has been assigned as my locker.

  “Another thing,” Dad yells through the locker room. “I forgot to tell you boys this earlier, but Moore will be sharing the locker room with you and she will live in the same house with you. Do I approve of this? No. Will I kill anyone who touches her? Yes.” He lets that sink in and then says, “That’s it. See you boys bright and early. Eight a.m.”

  As Dad leaves, everyone turns to look at me. Since some of the guys are already naked, I put my head down as I fall onto the bench before reaching down to take off my skates.

  “How the fuck do they expect us to share our space with this cunt?” I hear someone say, and I close my eyes, undoing my skates.

  “What? Scared I’ll make fun of your small dick?” I say with as much gusto as I can manage.

  Everyone starts to laugh, but then it just goes silent. Looking up, I see Jayden standing in front of me, his hands on his hips. But his eyes aren’t on me, he’s looking at the team. “Let’s get one thing straight. Like Coach said, she is part of our team. Do we call our teammates cunts? No, we do not,” he says, his voice carrying through the locker room. “We will not treat her like a pariah. She is our sister, I guess. We take care of what is ours, and if I hear one more person call her something derogatory, I will take you out.”

  No one says anything, and all I can do is gape up at him. Snapping my mouth shut, I say, “I don’t need you to defend me.”

  He nods, looking back at me. “You’re right, but this is my team, and they won’t disrespect their teammates.”

  “It’s not your team,” I say, standing up. “Not yet.”

  He scoffs, his eyes burning into mine as he crosses his arms across his very chiseled chest.

  Not that I noticed or anything.

  I don’t even see that the towel he wears is hanging low on his hips, that a little line of hair is going down to the spot I so desperately wanted to explore at one time. But no more. He is my enemy.

  “You can try, but you won’t get it, Moore. Not while I’m breathing.”

  “Then I guess I’ll need to cut off your air supply, because this team will be mine.”

  I hear a few people laugh and even some oooh out, but Jayden doesn’t move; his eyes are glued to mine. Challenging me. “We will see.”

  “Yeah, we will,” I say, glaring back at him. Shaking his head, he turns his back on me and heads to his locker. Which is right across from mine. Sitting down, he crosses his legs before leaning back in his locker, taking his phone out. Looking around, I see all kinds of expressions. Angry, annoyed, and even some look apologetic.

  Actually only Jace and Markus look apologetic.

  Sucking in a deep breath, I sit down and take my skates off, wiggling my toes before hanging them up. I’m about to lean back in my locker to wait until everyone is done, since I am not getting in the shower with thirty other guys, when Jayden’s voice carries through the locker room again.

  “Where you going, McCarthy?”

  Looking up, I see McCarthy pause and point to the showers. “I’m going to shower.”

  “No. Moore goes first.”

  Huh? What?

  “The fuck? No way, I’m not waiting for her to wash her hair and shave her legs,” he spits back, glaring at me before looking back at Jayden.

  “There are thirty-two of us and one of her. I don’t expect her to wait on all of us, and I really don’t think it’s appropriate for her to be in there with us,” he says before standing, towering over McCarthy. “So we will wait. Because that’s what a gentleman does, and I’m sure she won’t be long.”

  “She can go home for all I care. I’m not waiting.”

  “Yes, you are. Or like you suggested, you can go home.”

  Sputtering, he glares before yelling, “Why are we making special accommodations for some bitch?”

  Glaring, Jayden takes a step to him and says, “Because that bitch is part of our team.”

  “I’ll show you both a bitch,” I say, but they ignore me, and really, I’m glad they did. There was no point in clarifying that other than to make myself feel better.

  “Fuck that,” he says, and when he starts to walk, Jayden presses his hand into his chest.

  “You go into that shower before her or even when she is in there, not only will I kick your ass, but I will make sure Coach knows about it. He is trusting us to be respectful to her. Maybe you weren’t raised that way, but I was, and since you are on my team, we are going to do things my way,” he says, and then Jace and Markus flank him, all of them staring McCarthy down.

  You could cut the tension with a blade.

  It’s so thick I’m choking on it, but finally, McCarthy is shaking his head as he backs up. He then turns, heading back to his locker. Looking over at me, he says, “Hurry the fuck up.”

  Now, I know I should be grateful, even be glad that Jayden stood up for me.

  Maybe even swoon a bit, but I’m not a normal girl.

  So, of course, that means that I’m fucking pissed.

  Standing up, I glare over at McCarthy and say, “No, please, be my guest. I’m not ready to shower yet.”

  McCarthy eyes me before looking back over at Jayden. Jayden then asks, “Are you sure?”

  I nod. “Yup.”

  “Fine,” he says, waving me off. “Hurry up, boys.”

  It’s like a damn cattle drive. Everyone rushes toward the shower and I’m standing there, not only pissed the hell off but also a little intimidated. How am I supposed to take over a team that already feels that Jayden is the captain? The whole day, they’ve basically been at his beck and call. They respect him, and I know they’ll vote him right away. But I know my dad doesn’t do votes, he picks. Which means, if he picks me, I won’t get any respect here.

  Holding Jayden in a hostile gaze, I ask, “Can I talk to you?”

  Jayden meets my gaze and raises his eyebrow. “Me?”

  “Yeah, you,” I say and then I storm out of the locker room. I don’t hear him behind me until I reach the side doors that lead outside. When I go out, I turn, crossing my arms over my chest. I’m only wearing my socks, girdle, and tank, and thankfully, he’s put shorts on.

  Thank the heavens.

  But damn, he is gorgeous.

  Matching my stance, he doesn’t say anything which throws me off a bit, but then I r
emember that I’m pissed and it’s all his fault.

  “How dare you treat me like a fucking girl in there? I can take care of my own fucking self! I don’t need your help.”

  “Never said you did,” he says calmly, like I’m not a raging bitch. “I just refuse to allow them to disrespect you.”

  “Let them! It’s their funeral if my dad finds out. I can handle them on my own.”

  Rolling his eyes, he looks at me blankly as he says, “I know that, but did it ever occur to you that I don’t want it to get to that? If I can nip it in the bud and put them on the right track so we can win and not worry about outdoing the girl, doesn’t that make me a better captain? Doesn’t that show that I can lead? I think it does.”

  “So it’s not about defending me,” I say, and I don’t know why that bothers me. “It’s about pushing your candidacy for captain?”

  “Not at all. That’s in the bag, sweetheart. I respect you, and I expect my team to do the same.”

  Oh, he’s poking the bear something insane. “I’m not your fucking sweetheart, one! Two, it ain’t your damn team!”

  With a smug grin, he shrugs. “So you say.”

  I’m blistering with anger. I want to smack his damn smug face and then kick him in the shin. Basically growling, I ask, “Why don’t you just stop with this façade? You aren’t all high and mighty as you put off!”

  “Never said I was. I’m only stating the truth. You’re the one flying off the damn handle because I’m trying to be a good guy.”

  Oh, it’s like he just set me on fire. “Ah! With the fucking good-guy bullshit. I’ve heard that line. Bullshit.”

  “It wasn’t a line,” he says, still so fucking calm. “It was the truth.”

  How is he fucking calm? Why don’t I affect him like he is affecting me? My heart, it’s a sledgehammer in my chest. My body, shaking. My skin, gooseflesh. Every hair on my body is standing at attention, and this asshole is just standing there.

  Looking down at me like I’m nothing.

  No, wait. A nuisance! He’s looking at me like I’m a fucking nuisance!

  A fly he doesn’t want bothering him, but I’m not damn fly.

  I’m a killer fucking bee that’s about to sting him in the eye!

  “Why don’t you do us both a fucking favor and completely stop talking to me?”

  “Not gonna happen, you’re my teammate.”

  “Yeah, teammate, but you are treating me like an ex. I don’t like it.”

  “How?” he asks incredulously, and finally, I’m getting some kind of emotion!

  “By defending me and shit. Why do you even care?”

  “Because it’s the right thing to do,” he says with a shrug and then he laughs. “You’re kinda psycho, you know.”

  “Fuck you! It’s not the right thing to do; you are doing it to get in my pants.”

  “Whoa!” he says with a laugh. “Get over yourself. I’m doing it to better our team.”

  “So you don’t want to sleep with me?”

  Wait, what? Why did I ask that?

  When his lips curve in a sinful grin, it takes everything in me to brace myself from turning into a puddle of goo. Oh sweet God, I know why I asked.

  Because I want to know.

  “Didn’t say that. I’m just trying to better our team. You’re the one letting issues from Florida come and set the tone for our relationship.”

  Basically seething, not only because he could be right but because I’m a bumbling baboon, I say, “There is no relationship! Do us both a favor and forget Florida ever happened.”

  Taking a step toward me, he says very low and in a very naughty way, “I’m not the one bringing it up, and don’t you think I’ve tried?”

  Sucking in a breath, I look at him like he hit me. What does that even mean? “Well, try harder. I made the biggest mistake ever talking to you.”

  “That’s debatable,” he says with a shrug. “I enjoyed myself.”

  “It should have never happened.”

  “But it did, and you liked it when it was good,” he says, running his tongue along his lips as his eyes drift to my lips. “You liked that I challenged you, that I made you smile, hell, you may even have liked me. You liked it so much, it’s obvious it’s bothering you and you want to talk it out, which is very unlike you. You don’t like talking your feelings out, eh?”

  My eye is twitching. Along with my fist. I want to hit him, but I am not going to do that. No. We will not resort to hitting. It’s not nice.

  “You don’t know shit about me,” I spit and he grins.

  “Oh, I do, and it’s killing you that I’m sitting here, calm as hell, while you fly off the damn handle.”

  “Fuck you,” I snarl and he chuckles.

  “Anytime, baby,” he says, and without thinking, I push him.

  I know, I said no hitting, but pushing doesn’t count.

  Right?

  “Always wanting to put your hands on me,” he teases with a grin.

  Now I’m gonna punch him!

  But instead, I suck in a deep breath, letting it out of my nose before glaring up at him.

  “No, remember I tried that, and you threw that chance away.”

  He shrugs. “Wasn’t the right time.”

  “Oh really? Could have fooled me when you had your tongue down my throat and your hands all over me.”

  Shaking his head, he tucks his hands in his pockets in almost a boy next door way but I know he’s the devil in disguise. “It wasn’t right.”

  “Oh yeah, the good-guy bullshit.”

  Finally, his cool breaks. Glaring at me, he yells, “You were drunk, I was drunk!”

  “Doesn’t stop anyone else.”

  “Because they are dicks.”

  “And so are you.”

  “Really? Because I think we both know I’m not, you’re just so fucking prideful, you won’t admit I did you a favor!”

  He’s kinda scary when he yells, not that I’m feeling that kind of way because I’m not.

  Just for the record, of course.

  “Favor? You rejected me! Made me feel this small,” I say, holding my thumb and forefinger out. “You embarrassed me. Told me my mom didn’t want me. How is that doing me a fucking favor? Please. Enlighten me.”

  Looking away, he pulls in a breath through his nose and slowly nods his head. Looking back at me, his eyes hold mine, and I can see all the remorse in the world in them. This whole day I’ve been waiting to see his eyes tell me something, and finally they are talking to me. He’s sorry, but I don’t care, I won’t forgive him.

  I can’t.

  Clearing his throat, he says softly, “I am truly sorry for that. It was wrong of me, and I should have never said that. But you weren’t giving up, and I had no choice.”

  I refuse to allow what he said come back and bother me. Shaking my head, I give a soulless laugh as I say, “Oh, because I’m such a thirsty bitch and I’m gonna beg for dick, eh?”

  He shakes his head. “I never thought that. You were mad, you were drunk. Was I wrong? Fuck yeah, I should have never done it the way I did, but I didn’t trust myself to tell you no. I wanted you, Baylor. Bad. But I couldn’t do it.”

  Completely perplexed, I shake my head. “How does that make sense? If you wanted me, then why didn’t you fuck me?”

  I don’t even realize he’s moving until his face is in line with mine, his nose almost touching mine as his eyes bore into me. My whole body goes still, my breathing stops as his eyes search mine. It’s very hard to think when someone like Jayden Sinclair is that close to you.

  “Did it ever fucking occur to you that you are worth way more than a one-night stand? Did it ever cross your mind that that’s why I did what I did? Because I respect you, and I think too highly of you than to fuck you and then leave you? Did it, Baylor?”

  When I don’t answer, he shakes his head. “You think so low of yourself, you think that you’re only worth the respect in this sport, but you are worth way more than
that, okay? So yeah, I’m sorry, and believe me, I regret the way it went down. But I’m glad we didn’t sleep together,” he says, and I don’t know how he gets closer, but he does and my breathing, yeah, it’s nonexistent. “Because when I do lay you down, my body smothering yours, I want you to be completely aware of what is going on and who is giving you the greatest pleasure of your life.”

  I’m speechless. Utterly speechless.

  Drawing in a deep breath, I can’t believe what he is saying to me and then I remember that this cannot happen. Blinking out of the little lust cloud that he’s created to fog my judgment, I push him away and shake my head.

  “Will never happen,” I sneer at him, my eyes sending him to the pits of hell.

  “Don’t say never, Baylor,” he says before backing up from me. “And don’t expect me not to stand up for you. I have to.”

  “And why is that?” I find myself asking.

  “Because I care,” he says before reaching for the door. “About you.”

  I want to cry, I am so mad, because he makes no fucking sense. I don’t understand him, and I don’t understand why I want to understand him. He is nothing to me. He can’t be anything.

  “Stay away from me!”

  Looking over his shoulder at me, he shrugs. “I’ll try, but I can’t say that you’ll stay away from me.”

  Before I can answer because, again, he’s left me speechless, he opens the door and slams it shut. When my lip starts to wobble, I sink my teeth into it and bite hard, willing myself to let it go. To not allow him to affect me. But I know I can’t. He’s somehow figured me out, and I don’t know how to handle that.

  Cursing myself, I head inside as I mentally kick my ass. I can’t allow this to happen. He can’t have any control over me. Not only will it fuck with my head but it’ll fuck up my game, and I can’t allow him to do that. I have to ignore him.

  But when I get inside, I know that’s gonna be one hell of a feat.

  The room is still full of all the guys who have showered, but he hasn’t. Looking up at me, he says, “Go take a shower.”

  “I can wait for you to get done,” I snap, but he’s shaking his head.

  “No, go,” he says before pulling his legs up against this chest. Everyone looks at me, and I want to fight him on it, but I don’t think I can after what just happened outside. I want to shower and go home. I want to sleep. Between him and my dad, I’m done, I quit. But then, of course, I don’t want to let him win.