REM

by Valentine, J. D.

  Chad sat beside Danny, holding a semi-automatic shotgun. He was already wearing a tan colored body armor and had his helmet unbuckled at the chin as he smoked his vape quietly.

  "You should try this shit, Etter," Chad smiled holding out the rectangular vape. "It's peach-mango."

  Danny grabbed it, looking at it like it was a strange creature. "You know in my day, we used to smoke cigarettes like men."

  Chad laughed as he rubbed his shotgun. "Just try it, old man."

  Danny took a puff.

  Holy shit he wasn’t kidding.

  He took another hit out of pure curiosity.

  "They also have a bubblegum flavor," Chad blurted out.

  Danny looked over grinning. "Let's not push our luck there, mi amigo." He handed the vape back. "You doing alright?"

  Chad looked out at the street. "I’m shit. The love of my life abandoned me for some trust fund asshole." He took another puff shaking his head. "I’ll be alright in time."

  Just keep the faith, Chad.

  A hand tapped Danny's shoulder, pulling him from the small window that he was peering out of. He looked back to see Eric ushering him to the back room.

  "I want to show you something," Eric said. He turned and crept to the back bedroom. Danny followed Eric being careful not to make too much noise. Danny heard something open in Eric’s closet. When he walked in, he saw Eric laying two rifles onto the bed.

  "What do we have here," Danny smiled as he picked up a short-barreled AR-15. It was tan with a holographic sight mounted on it and a flashlight on the end. He looked back at Eric, who was grabbing more gear. "I should have arrested you while I had the chance. This shit is totally illegal in Commie California."

  "Yeah well, the idiots who passed those laws are probably dead in a ditch somewhere now." Eric lifted two heavy duffle bags out of the closet. He grunted as he set them on the floor next to the bed. "Besides the way I see it, I am from Arizona, so they can suck my ass."

  Danny shrugged as he sighted in the weapon. "What's in the duffle bags, if you don't mind me asking?"

  Eric unzipped the one bag and pulled out two tan armored plate carriers. There was nothing attached to them as far as pouches for ammunition, but it was still better than having nothing.

  "Since you and I are stuck together, I thought we could use some protection," Eric laughed as he laid it on the plate carrier on the bed. "I have a chest rig for you to hold eight magazines. If we gotta run, we can ditch the armor but still be able to carry our ammo."

  Danny raised his hand. "Hang on, hang on." He set the rifle down on the bed. "Where did you get all this shit anyway?"

  Eric looked at all the equipment on his bed as he set two helmets down on it. It was easily eight thousand dollars worth of hardware. He scratched his head. "Well, my parents passed when I was eight and they left me a substantial amount of money. They were smart enough to not give it to me until I was twenty-five."

  "You were an orphan?"

  "Yeah," He said, rubbing the back of his neck. "No one else in my family wanted me. All they wanted was my parents’ money and when they found out that I wasn’t worth anything, they sent me away. So, I spent some time in the foster care system. It was tough because I was a little guy. Got beat up quite a lot." Eric smirked slightly. "Hell, I even got adopted once by this older couple. The father was a mean old bastard who had one hell of a backhand."

  Danny shook his head. He never thought Eric had an upbringing like that. "Eric, I'm sorry man. I had no idea."

  Eric put his hand up in protest. "Yeah well, boohoo." He sat down on a chair that was next to the bed. "Anyway. They left me a decent amount of money. So, I bought things that I knew would serve me in case anything happened." He smiled as he rested his elbows on his knees. "Hell, I'm glad they waited to give it to me till I was older. Probably would have blown it on strippers and beer."

  "Well, you’ve come a hell of a long way."

  Eric smiled as he stood up from the chair. "Yeah, I guess. Look, I’ve got nothing to offer you other than my skill set. Truth be told, I have nothing worth a damn in my life other than you and that little stoner outside. I realize how much those kids and Maria mean to you. I mean, hell, we gotta have something to fight for in this world, which is why I'm going to help you get north to your family." Danny was about to speak, but Eric put his hand up. "On one condition though. I need you to promise me one thing."

  "Absolutely, Eric," Danny replied.

  "If I become one of those—things, you don't hesitate to put a bullet in the back of my head."

  Danny looked at the floor for a moment and back at Eric. "Is that all?" He said, jokingly.

  Eric smiled. "You really are a bastard." He stood and walked up to Danny sticking his hand out. "Let's get you home, Etter."

  Danny shook his hand, firmly patting Eric's shoulder with his other hand. The bearded man smiled as they both let go. He walked back tossing Danny a helmet.

  "It's a medium, so it should fit," Eric said as he started to load magazines. "Your head doesn't look too massive."

  "Which head are you talking about?"

  "Very funny," Eric laughed.

  Danny smiled as he tried it on. "Why not give this stuff to Chad?"

  "He was a cook in the Marine Corps. The only thing he can do is make just about anything somewhat edible. He is better off with that shotgun. Plus, he has some gear that he stole when he was in the Corps. Trust me he is fine."

  "Well, that explains a lot."

  Eric laughed as he started loading extra magazines.

  "Speaking of Chad, what is he going to do?"

  Eric kept loading magazines. "Oh, he will be coming along," he said nonchalantly.

  Danny set the helmet down as he grabbed a magazine from a pile in the middle. "You don't think he is going to protest you on that one?"

  "No," Eric said, waving him off. "He will be thrilled."

  ***

  "No fucking way. Not until Francesca is here and even then we can just hang out till it all blows over," Chad said as he stormed off in the kitchen.

  Danny rolled his eyes.

  "Chad, look it's two versus one on this," Eric said as he walked to the kitchen counter that had a barstool top.

  "You said it yourself that you had too many close calls just coming back here, and now you want to go on this crusade to go find this guy's family?" Chad looked at Danny. "No offense there, Dan, but I'm not trying to get ass fucked by a bunch of psycho nut jobs."

  Eric walked around the counter, so Chad was blocked in. "Come on. How long do you really expect to hide here getting stoned and making ramen?"

  Chad was holding his bong now like it was a pet. "Quite a long time, Eric. Hell maybe this will all blow over and good old Uncle Sam will bust down the door with beer and tittie magazines, while your corpses are getting sodomized by the Manson family."

  "They aren't butt fucking each other out there Chad," Eric said. "I mean, yeah we had some close calls, but we had no concrete plan——"

  "So, next time will be different?"

  Eric held his tongue, looking at Danny for help. Danny shrugged as he sat in the lazy boy.

  This is all you, Eric.

  Eric rubbed his beard, making it all frizzled. "Chad, we won't be leaving for at least two weeks, which means this shit will be simmering down."

  Chad's bong bubbled as he inhaled the steam of THC. He looked over at Eric with teary eyes. "It's still a fire out there, Eric. You are basically asking me to douse myself in gasoline and light a match. This is...suicide."

  "Oh come on," Eric whined.

  "Look, I helped you guys out with the whole YMCA thing and that blew up. I thought you both got killed. This time I'm throwing in the towel." Chad pointed at himself. "Chad Ho is going to wait for Franchesca and for all this shit to blow over."

  "She is a prostitute, Chad," Eric pleaded.

  "I love her," Chad said.

  Eric massaged his temple. "Okay, let me get this through your thick skull. S
he sucks dicks and then receives money. You are nothing to her."

  "How fucking dare you!"

  Eric pointed at him. "Chad, if you keep up with this shit, then I'm going to kick your ass."

  Chad's eyes jumped between Eric and Danny now as he clutched the bong closer to his body. "Eric, come on! Not this shit." He looked at Danny now with pleading eyes. "Dan, come on."

  Danny swiveled his chair back to the T.V.

  Eric was rolling his sleeves up as he cracked his neck. "Just say it."

  Chad was back against the wall. "Say what?"

  "You're sorry, and you’d be honored to join us."

  Chad put the bong on the counter. "No way. I've got too much to live for—" Chad started to yell, but Eric covered his mouth.

  Eric was pulling on the man's ear. "Say it."

  "Fuck you, Forbes, you—"

  A slap cut off Chad.

  "Say it," Eric said with a smile.

  "You are such an asshole."

  Eric wrapped his arm around Chad’s head and pulled his ear lower to the floor, making the man clench his teeth.

  "Say the whole thing," Eric said sternly.

  "Alright. Alright. I'm sorry, and I'll be honored to join you on your voyage. You happy asshole?"

  Eric let go and patted his shoulder. "Very." He licked his finger and shoved it in Chad’s ear. "Wet willy."

  Chad recoiled as he started slapping Eric as hard as he could. Eric retreated back around the counter.

  "Asshole," Chad said as he tried cleaning out his ear.

  Danny shook his head with a smile and turned back around, looking at the news.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  THE PINE NEEDLES crackled under Danny’s feet. He stopped, letting his movements fall quiet. Danny’s breathing was drowned out by the rustling of the trees overhead. The rush of a cold wind brushed against his face making him look up. Giant pines danced to the rhythmic balance of hot and cold fronts. Danny’s eyes slowly fell back down upon the forest. He looked out in front of him, where an endless view of the snow capped trees cascaded outward. To his left, he could see a blue body of water that was encompassed by snow capped pines. He took a deep breath in expecting to be filled with that enticing smell of pine needles and sap, but instead it was a horrid smell that greeted him.

  It was that smell.

  The smell that came from horror stories that the mind could only imagine. It stuck to the air like black tar, filling Danny’s nostrils until he wanted to gag.

  A branch snapped in the distance. Danny's heart raced as he searched behind him. Trees stood unwavering as dark shadows jumped in between them.

  Run.

  Branches clawed and reached for Danny as he tried to get away from the smell. His legs nearly stumbling over one another as he tried to move faster, but no matter how quickly he ran the smell seemed to intensify until it felt like it was in front of him.

  Where are you?

  He closed his eyes crying out, unsure of what to do and suddenly it was gone. He opened his eyes to find a beautiful lake that sat in a tranquil ravine. He could hear a small stream trickle in the distance. Above him stood a giant sugar pine that had been stripped of all its foliage.

  "Danny," a silvery but familiar voice called out.

  He turned and saw a woman with her back to him. She had long black hair that had been braided in the back. Danny could hear a baby start to cry.

  "Shhh," the woman whispered.

  "Maria," Danny said. He walked up behind her slowly, each step he could hear pine needles crack under his feet. "Maria, it’s Danny."

  He put his hand on her shoulder, and immediately, the smell was back. He pulled his hand away. Maria's head snapped back, except it wasn't Maria. It was that girl who had Danny by the neck in the truck. She smiled, showing her broken teeth, except they were bright red.

  Red like blood.

  He tried to run, but his feet were still. Panic set in as Danny looked down at his feet trying to get them to move, but he realized that he was laying on the ground now. He blinked and saw that his legs were now twisted in awkward angles with bits of bone protruding from his skin. Danny looked back up only to find the girl was in his face. He could feel her brittle fingernails brush and scrape at his cheek. He tried to cry out, but his throat was cinched by the woman's shattered teeth that started ripping into his flesh.

  Danny shot up from the sofa. He was drenched with sweat as he tried to slow his heart rate. He sat up, taking a sip of water, trying to calm himself.

  Oh...God.

  "You were moaning," a husky voice said from the shadows.

  Danny sighed as he sat up.

  "Thought I was going to have to wake you." Eric stood up from his post near the small window. He had his rifle cradled in his meaty hands.

  Danny sat hunched over on the sofa. "You probably should've." He tried to focus his eyes on the clock, but everything was blurry. "What time is it anyway?"

  Eric took a seat on the lazy boy letting the rifle rest on his lap. "It's 'bout one-thirty. Chad's supposed to be on watch soon, but I am afraid he might be too stoned from earlier. You should get some sleep."

  "Nah, I’m not going back to bed," Danny said as he swallowed.

  He stood up, stretching his back. It popped slightly making him exhale with relief. Danny slumped back down in his basketball shorts. Slowly, he sat back up as he grabbed his new rifle and set it on the table. "You get some sleep, man. I'll take it."

  Eric stood up from the chair. "You sure?"

  "Yeah, I'm going to be up regardless."

  "I appreciate it, man. In all honesty, I was struggling to stay awake for a moment there. Started bobbing for cock a few times."

  Danny chuckled softly as he stood up stretching one last time.

  Eric yawned heavily. "You know I was thinking--"

  "About?" Danny said as he scratched the back of his head.

  "I think I’m gonna actually miss McGuiness. Granted I still hate...well...hated that fat bastard, but I don’t know."

  "What do you mean?"

  "It makes me think what Batman would do if the Joker died? It’s almost like he completed me."

  "Alright, Jerry Mcguire, why don’t you get some sleep?"

  Eric smiled as he gathered his things and started walking towards his room. Danny noticed he was wearing abnormally large fuzzy slippers that looked like they were bear's feet.

  "Hey uh, Eric, one last thing?"

  Eric stopped by the wall and turned leaning his side on it. "What's up, chief?"

  "What the hell is on your feet?"

  Eric gazed down at his feet, lifting his left foot. He wiggled the fuzzy slipper a little with his wise-ass smirk.

  "Creature comforts, my man," Eric winked as he turned back and walked to his bedroom.

  Danny laughed, shaking his head. He walked up to the window that looked over the street. It still surprised him that the power grid was still on. The streetlights looked like small pockets of resistance holding against the ever-growing darkness.

  A light crack came from somewhere in the house, making Danny jump for his rifle. He felt himself tighten, and his crotch went warm as blood started to redistribute throughout his body. Danny held his rifle ready to move, but nothing happened. He sat there stiff and petrified for a few minutes until the fear subsided, and he sat back in the chair. His eyes traced the sidewalk from right to left, looking for any signs of movement. Far off in the distance, there was a line of red and orange that seemed to grow closer. The fire was still burning bright, making the air feel nauseous and heavy. Ash was beginning to fall on the streets, making it appear as if gray snow that settled on the concrete sidewalk.

  All is calm.

  Danny got up and made a small cup of coffee for himself. He added a little milk to help cool it down. When Danny sat back down, he took a sip that seemed to wash away the crudeness that accompanied such an early wake-up. He could smell the hazelnut, which reminded him of those mornings back when things were norm
al when he wouldn't have to work.

  Creature comforts. You are right about that one, Eric.

  The mug was set on the little nightstand that had been placed next to the chair. Danny peered out the window back at the street lamp that sat across the road. He sat forward, rubbing his eyes into focus.

  What?

  A small girl stood under the lamp. She moved her hands in a rhythmic dance as heavy ash rained down on her clothes. It was almost peaceful to watch her spin. It reminded Danny of those old musicals that Maria and Susan would watch on rainy afternoons. Danny rubbed his eyes once more, trying to wake himself up. The girl was still there, but she had stopped and was now staring down the street. A stone wall blocked his view from seeing what she was looking at, but she began to cry out in terror.

  She ran right for the condos screaming. "Help me! Please, God, help me!"

  Danny watched in disbelief as she ran straight for their complex. The gate had been left open, making it easy for the girl to run right in. She sprinted straight to Eric's garage, disappearing out of sight below the window. He could hear light fists as they pounded heavily on the garage door. Danny heard more voices and looked up to see five or six adults. They were hard to count as all of them moved quickly towards the screaming girl. Danny pulled his rifle close to his body, but someone grabbed his shoulder, shoving him down.

  Eric pulled Danny to the bottom of the window. Both men peered out the window in horror.

  "What the hell, man? She needs help," Danny whispered.

  "You want to make it to your wife, then don't be a fucking hero," Eric replied. His voice was low and choppy, like gravel.

  Chad walked up completely naked with only a body armor plate carrier and helmet on. He held a pistol in his hand.