Memoirs of a Girl Wolf

by Lawrence, Xandra

  I looked up at him and brushed a golden lock of hair out of his dark eyes which were still staring down at my hand he had hold of, but he shook his head away from my hand and took a step back.

  “I’ve been thinking,” he began.

  Thinking? My heart squeezed.

  “And with everything that has happened,” he choked on his words, “you’re right. It’s not safe for us to be together.”

  “But your dad is no longer a threat,” I said in disbelief. How could he do this?

  “He wasn’t the only threat,” Reign said.

  And that’s when I sensed his fear. He was afraid of me. I examined his face and my eyes settled on the red scar that started above his right eyebrow and touched almost to his ear. I thought of the even bigger scar across his side that was hidden by his shirt. I spun away from him with guilt and shame that I was the one who had so badly wounded him. I understood, though I didn’t want to, that he had every right to be afraid of me.

  All that was heard were the chirping birds having flown back recently from the South. They dropped to the ground in a mass of blue and yellow and then picked back up and settled in the high branches of the trees around us and then dropped to the ground again repeating this cycle as we stood near one another not touching, or speaking, or meeting the others eyes.

  “I’ll take the powder,” I said, turning back toward him as I suddenly remembered what Mom had told me moments before. “There’s still more. I can take it and be normal. Then we can be together.”

  “You’ll forget,” he said.

  “I won’t forget you. I’ll forget you’re a Hunter. I’ll forget about Morphics, but I won’t forget you.”

  “You would do that?” he asked.

  “I’ll do it for you, so that we can be together, right? Then we can be together.”

  He nodded and pulled me toward him, wrapping his arms around me tightly, and I nestled my head under chin listening to his strong heartbeat.

  I didn’t ask Reign to stay because before I drank the powder I needed to ask Viktor something. He was in the master bedroom talking with Mom, who was crying. Phoenix stood in the doorway talking with Viktor in hushed voices.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked.

  “Your mother is upset because it’s time for me to go,” Viktor said.

  “I don’t understand why. Orgon isn’t going to track you anymore,” Mom said.

  I saw this as my opportunity to ask him what I wanted to know ever since I saw him morph into the white wolf.

  “Did you kill Reign’s mom?” I asked.

  Both Mom and Viktor looked at me, but only Viktor replied, “I have never killed an innocent human.”

  “Reign thinks his mom was killed by a white wolf right back in the woods.”

  “That’s not what happened, sweetie. Reign’s mother was already severely attacked by the time your father found her and it was a case of bad timing. Seconds after your father arrived, a woman came along with a Hunter’s gun and your father left,” Mom said.

  “But Orgon was told that a white wolf killed his wife and he has been tracking me since,” Viktor said.

  “Then what killed her?” I asked.

  “We don’t know,” Mom said, shaking her head.

  “Like the attacks that have been happening recently? Is there a connection,” I asked.

  “No, they just released that the attacks are most likely a cult of some kind every victim was marked with some type of weird symbol,” Mom said.

  “Symbol?” Viktor repeated and glanced at Phoenix who was almost not visible as he was now standing in the hallway.

  “Don’t leave, Vik. I need you here with us. We’re your family,” Mom pleaded.

  “I need to protect me family and Orgon is not the only one I am protecting you from. My responsibility to my family and my pack does not end because of Orgon. Danger still seeks me. I won’t rest here at the cost of one of my loved ones getting hurt. Focus on regaining a sense of normalcy. Mickey needs you especially now as she navigates being normal again. Help her focus on something, college even.”

  Phoenix and Mom looked at me for clarification.

  “I have exceptional hearing. I heard you have decided to take the powder,” Viktor said.

  Mom threw her arms around me while Phoenix shook his head. I could hear him walk through the house and out the front door, but Mom didn’t notice that he had left. She jumped up and ran to the kitchen where she started making me a cup of tea with the powder and Viktor took a seat on the couch in the dark room with his fingers pressed to his lips as he watched me, disappointed. I moved to leave the room.

  “I’m going to sit here for a bit. I’ll join you both in the kitchen,” Viktor said.

  I shrugged and left the room.

  After a few minutes, Mom set a cup of yellowish pink hot tea in front of me. Bits of the powder that hadn’t dissolved floated on the top. She pushed it toward me and then deciding Viktor should be with us during this moment she left to get him.

  I was alone with the drink that would change my life and save my relationship, but just as I brought the mug to my lips I heard mom cry out that Viktor was gone.

  I set the mug back down, and staring at it for a second, I knocked it over into the sink and watched the liquid disappear down the drain before tending to Mom.

  Sneak Peak: Book Two

  I though Phoenix had left with Viktor because every time I drove out to his cabin he wasn’t home. I waited many hours for him and he never returned. I called his name over and over again and he never appeared. I tried sensing him like I was able to the night he was hurt, but I hadn’t been able to sense him again, until one morning when Mom was gone picking up the twins from my grandparents, and Reign was at home keeping Thrice from visiting Orgon, that I sensed Phoenix in a familiar place not too far from me. He was near the lake where we had chased one another months before.

  There was a heavy spring storm the night before. The strong winds tore tree limbs down. The roads were blocked with debris and I had to walk most of the way, but I finally found him near the water sitting in the sand watching the current.

  I walked up behind him and sat down. He didn’t acknowledge me and I didn’t expect him to.

  “Where have you been?” I asked.

  “Around. I’m thinking of moving,” he said.

  “You can’t do that,” I replied.

  “What’s it to you. You won’t even remember me,” he said.

  “You’re right. Maybe that’s the real reason I didn’t drink it,” I said.

  He looked at me. A half smile flashed on his face. “You didn’t?”

  “Nah, but you can’t say anything to anyone.”

  “Who would I tell? I don’t like people,” he said.

  “I’m serious. Mom and Reign they think I drank it.”

  “How long will that last?” he asked, disapprovingly.

  “A while, I hope,” I said. I stared into the sun, blinking feverishly then looked back at my friend who was staring at me. “What do we do now?” I asked.

  Phoenix scanned our surroundings. “Play,” he said, jumping up he lunged forward and morphed. I laughed as I watched him run in and out of the water. He came up to me and nudged me with his nose.

  “I can’t gain consciousness during the day.” I reminded him, but he pulled on my jeans with his sharp teeth so I swatted him away promising him I’d try. I closed my eyes, breathed deeply, willed my mind to go blank, and once I reached that calming state, like Phoenix had trained my to do, I heard a pop and opening my eyes, I lifted my hand to my face to find it not a hand, but a paw. Elated I jumped around and chased my tail. I saw Phoenix take off running along the water. I followed suit close behind.

  I jumped, pounced, ran, breathed and chased Phoenix into the woods. My soul, my entire being was free and light.

  But I wasn’t paying attention, I was running too fast and all of a sudden I was falling into a deep hole, but my fall was broken by something. Next to me was
a tree which I guessed fell the night before from strong storm winds, but that wasn’t what broke my fall. I rolled over and stood as I changed back into my human form. Brushing myself off, I looked around and saw to my horror, a body, half naked crumped at my feet. I covered my face. Slowly, I spread out my fingers and peeked at the body of a naked man. His eyes were missing and his mouth was open. His legs were bent underneath him. On his chest was a bloody marking that resembled something I recognized, but couldn’t remember where I had seen the marking before. Most likely he was another victim of the cult serial killer. Maybe I had seen the markings on the news recently or maybe a picture of Max’s scar had been posted on Facebook at some point.

  “Mickey?” Phoenix’s concerned voiced echoed down into the hole.

  I lifted my head and looked into Phoenix’s confused face and then back at the body before me and it dawned on me why the marking looked familiar. Phoenix had the same mark on the back of his neck.

  “Mickey? I’m coming down to get you,” Phoenix called as my blood turned cold.

  .”