Rilla rolled her eyes. “I’m not mad because you didn’t have flowers and a ring, Mason. I’m upset because you felt like you had to do it. You told me that me living here helped you as much as it did me. I believed you. But when you proposed tonight, it was because you felt sorry for me. Not because it’s a situation that would benefit both of us.”
“How do you know that? I told you before, Rilla, I’m no saint. If I asked you to marry me, you can bet I expect to get something out of it.” Even as I said them, the words were news to me. But I realized they were true.
“Oh, really? And just what benefit do you get from marrying me?” She raised one eyebrow in challenge.
I began counting off on my fingers. “I know I’d be giving my daughter a mother who’ll love her forever. I see you with Piper, Rilla. You’re amazing with her, and she loves you with all her heart.”
Rilla blinked, and I bit back a smile when her thumb rose toward her face. I was getting to her.
“I love Piper, too. But I’d stay with her as long as you want me, whether I was married to you or not.”
Damn. “Okay, but there’s a difference. If we got married, you’d really be her mother.”
She quirked her brow and rolled her hand in a go-on gesture. I took a deep breath.
“I like you, Rilla. I like you a lot. I’m comfortable with you. We laugh together ...” I swallowed hard. “I came home tonight and thought how much I like coming home and finding you in my house. In my kitchen. It feels right.”
Something I couldn’t identify passed swiftly over her face and then was gone. She rubbed her thumb over her bottom lip before she dropped her hand back to her side. “I appreciate that you thought you were doing the right thing, Mason. But I’ve thought about marriage a lot. When my father told me Jonathan wanted to marry me, I was thrilled on one level—because I’ve always wanted to be someone’s wife. And then someone’s mother. But I was worried because I didn’t understand how Jonathan knew he wanted to marry me. I convinced myself that he’d noticed more about me than I’d thought. Eventually, I realized the truth.
“If I’d stayed at home, Mason, I think I would’ve ended up married up to Jonathan. Not this year, maybe not for five more years, but it would’ve happened. And the only reason he would’ve done it would be to please my father, and because a pastor needs a wife. I might’ve gone along with that. That might’ve been my life. Do you know how that makes me feel, when I think about it now? It horrifies me.”
My gut began to churn as what she said sunk in. Was I guilty of doing the same thing as her father and that jackass Jonathan?
“Rilla ...” I clenched my jaw. “I don’t want to control you. I want to set you free. That’s why I asked you to marry me. I thought if you and I got married, you’d be free to be whoever and whatever you want. You want to make your PR business grow? I’ll support you, a hundred percent. You want to stay home and be a mom to Piper? I’m cool with that, too. I just ... I want you to be part of my life.”
“You want that now.” She glanced up at me through her lashes. “What happens when you meet someone else? Someone who you love? I don’t want to be divorced, Mason. I’d rather take my chances on ‘living in sin’”—she gave the words air quotes—“than end up divorced.”
“Rilla.” I risked stepping toward her and taking one of her hands in mine. “I have to be upfront about something. My wife ...” I swallowed back a surge of emotion. “Lu was it for me. I’m never going to fall in love again. She was everything, and I’m never going to experience that again.” I lifted her hand so that it was closer to my face, stroking the smooth skin on the back of her fingers. “You asked me what I’d get out of marrying you. I’d get to not be alone. I’d have a friend who I can share my daughter with. I’d have ... comfort.”
Rilla stared into my eyes, and I didn’t blink. The silence that surrounded us was so complete that I thought I could hear the beating of her heart.
Finally, she closed her eyes and nodded.
“Okay.”
I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT I was thinking. I’d steeled myself to argue against Mason until I was blue in the face, until he finally gave up and accepted that marriage to me was the single worst idea he’d ever had.
And then I’d heard his words about Lu, telling me that he was never going to love anyone like he had loved her ever again, that she was his only true love and there would never be anyone else like her in his life.
Naturally, it was after that I’d said yes.
I was a moron. A stupid, masochistic idiot. I’d just set myself up to marry a man who I was pretty sure I had a crush on, who’d admitted freely he only wanted me for companionship and to be a mother to his daughter. Only a person who had no other options or very low self-esteem would agree to a plan like that.
Or me, apparently.
I’d tossed and turned that night, until I calmed down enough to realize that I had time. Naomi was going into the hospital in two days for her stem cell transplant. There was no way Mason would want to do anything like get married while his mother was in the middle of a medical procedure like this. I’d have weeks to think about everything and decide how I really felt. Mason would have weeks to realize he’d made a huge mistake in asking me.
I’d been a little worried about seeing Mason the next morning, but nothing had changed. Naomi felt well enough to join us at the breakfast table, and we talked about what special meal I could make that evening, since it was the last night she’d be home for a long time. Mason lingered at the table as Piper helped me wash the dishes. And by helped me, I mean she stood on a stool next to me and played in the bubbles as she passed me the dirty silverware.
I felt his eyes on us as we worked and played, but he didn’t say much until it was almost time for him to leave for the club. He kissed Piper good-bye and called to his mom before laying a hand on my back. I tried not to hold my breath at his touch.
“Rilla, can you walk me out?”
I nodded and patted Piper’s head. “Run and see Nan for a minute, sweet pea. I’ll be right back.”
Mason opened the door for me and then followed me out. He slid his hand down my spine, to my lower back, rubbing just enough to send shivers over my skin.
“I wanted to say something in private.” He licked his lips and turned me so that I faced him. Running his fingers down my arms, he took my hands. “Thank you for saying yes last night. I want you to know, I heard what you said, about your worries. Your doubts. I promise, I’ll do anything in my power to make sure you never have reason to regret agreeing to marry me.”
“Thank you.” I wasn’t sure about the proper response in this situation.
“I was thinking that maybe we could drive into Savannah Thursday to get married. What do you think?”
My mouth dropped open, and my eyes widened. “Thursday? As in the day after tomorrow?”
“That’s what I was thinking. I figured we want to do it as soon as possible, so that no one can harass you anymore about living here.”
“But what about your mom? She’ll be in the hospital.”
“I know, but the first few days, they’re just running tests. The chemo blast won’t begin until Friday. That’s why Thursday’s perfect.”
I couldn’t think of a good reason to say no. “Okay. But what about Piper?”
“The schools are closed on Thursday and Friday this week for fall break. Meghan said she’d watch Piper for us.”
I frowned. “When did you ask her?”
“This morning. We texted.”
“Did you tell her why we were going to Savannah?”
Mason shook his head. “I just asked if she’d mind helping. I figured you’d want to tell her.”
“Yeah.” I nodded. “Okay. That sounds good.”
“Great.” He hesitated and then bent to kiss the top of my head. “I better get to work. I’ll be late tonight, since Rocky’s covering for me tomorrow while I’m at the hospital with Mom. I’ll have my phone if you need me.”
/>
I nodded again before I went back inside, feeling that my life had spun rapidly out of the control I’d held for a few weeks. I was going to marry Mason Wallace. It was the craziest idea in the world. I had to talk him—and myself—out of it before Thursday.
It didn’t happen. No matter what I said, Mason had an answer, and on Thursday morning, I found myself in Mason’s truck, sitting next to him as we pulled out of the driveway, on our way to Savannah. To get married. I definitely felt as though I’d fallen down the rabbit hole.
“Meghan thinks we’re crazy, doesn’t she?” Mason glanced at me.
“You know, it’s kind of weird, but no. When I told her, she just laughed.”
“Huh. I’d have thought she’d be yelling at me for pushing you into it. Did you tell her I had to twist your arm?”
“No.” I toyed with my seatbelt. “I just said, you know, it seemed like the right thing to do. And Meghan said she wasn’t surprised, because ...” I let my voice trail off.
“Because ... ?” Mason prompted.
“I don’t want to say.”
“Come on, Rilla. We’re about to get married. No secrets, and complete honesty. Right? That’s how marriage works. Tell me what Meghan said.”
I sighed. “She said she could tell from the day we met at the stand that we’d end up together.” I held my breath waiting for Mason’s response.
To my surprise, he laughed. “Only Meghan would see two people having a civil conversation and instantly think they’d end up madly in love.”
I forced myself to join his laughter. “I know. Crazy.” I stared out my window so Mason couldn’t see my face.
“Do you mind if we stop real fast on the way out of town? The front blinker’s out on the truck, and I don’t want to drive all the way into the city without fixing it. I want to see if Boomer has a replacement.”
“Boomer?” I crinkled my forehead.
“Yeah. He owns the auto repair shop.” He looked at me sideways. “I forget sometimes that even though you grew up around here, you don’t really know the town.”
“I know. When I go to the grocery store with Piper, people ask me when I moved here.” I shrugged. “I just go along with it.”
Boomer’s Auto Repair was on the main street leading into town. Mason turned into the parking lot and opened his door. “I’ll just be a minute, but why don’t you come in? I’ll introduce you to Boomer.”
I climbed down from the truck and followed Mason into the small shot. I could hear country music and the sound of machines and pounding coming from the adjacent garage. A man shouted out something, and another one responded.
A short, rotund balding man in a blue coverall with the name BOOMER embroidered on the chest stood behind the desk in the corner of the room. He was on the phone but turned when the bell on the door announced our arrival. He nodded at Mason and then his eyes dropped to me and he froze.
His stare was so intense that I looked behind me to see what this guy might be looking at. Mason frowned and draped his arm around my shoulder, drawing me closer to him.
“Let me call you back.” Without waiting for an answer, Boomer hung up the phone. He didn’t look away from me.
“Hey, Boomer. I just needed a replacement bulb for my blinker.”
The man behind the desk nodded. “Yeah, okay, Mason. Uh, who’s this?”
Mason tightened his hand on my upper arm. “This is Rilla. She’s, um, well ...” Mason glanced down at me as though he’d forgotten who I was. “She’s been helping me with Piper and my mom.”
“Rilla Grant?” Boomer shifted, folding his arms across his broad chest.
“Yeah.” Mason’s eyebrows were drawn together. “What’s going on here, Boomer? Y’all look like you’re seeing a ghost.”
Boomer rubbed his hand over his eyes. “I think in a way I am.” He blinked and shot me a tentative smile. “Guess you don’t know who I am?”
“Should I?” I tried to return the smile, but my heart was thumping erratically. I had a sudden premonition about what Boomer was going to say.
“Guess not. But I know you.” He came out from behind the desk. “Your mama was my baby sister.”
I closed my eyes. “Yeah, I figured it was something like that when you looked at me like I’d risen from the dead.” I paused. “She’s not, though, is she? Dead, I mean?” I’d always pictured my mother living some place glamorous, living an exciting life. Finding out she wasn’t even on this earth anymore would be harder than I’d expected.
But Boomer was shaking his head. “Naw, honey, she’s alive. Far as I know, anyway. She lives way out in Texas, last I heard.” He pointed to the hard fiberglass chairs in the tiny waiting area. “Will you sit for a minute?”
Mason stayed close to me, and I was grateful for his nearness. “So you’ve lived here in Burton all this time, knowing where I was, and you never came to visit?”
Boomer perched on the edge of a chair and braced his hands on his knees. “Yes and no. Yeah, I always lived here, and I knew where you were. But I did try to see you. When you were a baby, Millie and I came out to visit you and your mama all the time. Your cousins just loved you to bits.”
“My cousins?” I’d always wanted a big family and kids my own age to play with. Cousins had been a dream as long as I could remember.
“Oh, yeah. Millie and I got four girls, and then my other sister Tammie has two boys and a girl. She lives over toward Macon, though.”
Seven cousins. I had seven cousins. I pushed aside that thought to ask Boomer another question. “Why didn’t you keep coming after my mom left?”
He shook his head. “We wanted to, honey. But your father wouldn’t let us. He said he didn’t want any reminders of your mom at the farm, and he didn’t want us to, uh, influence you as you grew up.” He exhaled heavily. “He blamed my parents and me for spoiling your mother. He said what we’d done was part of the reason she’d run off. He couldn’t ever forgive us, and he stuck to his guns. It about broke my parents’ hearts.”
“Do they still live here in Burton?” Another set of grandparents ... cousins ... and an uncle and aunt. It made my head spin.
“I’m sorry, honey, they both passed. Daddy first, about sixteen years ago, and then Mama went ten years back.”
I fought tears over the grandparents I’d never know. “Why didn’t you fight my dad? You had rights. Or at least my grandparents did.”
“Your dad threatened to hire an attorney to keep us away. My parents didn’t have money for a lawyer, and even if they did, well, we all thought given the circumstances, we had to respect what your father wanted. He was the one raising you. I think we all felt a little guilty for your mama running off like she did.” Boomer scratched the sparse hair on his head.
I nodded, though I didn’t agree. There wasn’t any argument to be made, really; I couldn’t go back and change the past, no matter how much I might regret what my father had done. And, come to think of it, what my mother had done.
“Why did my mother leave me?” I didn’t mean the question to come out so plaintively.
“I wish I could tell you. She was real young when she married your dad, and I think once the novelty of being married and having a baby wore off, she didn’t have enough in her to stick. She did love you, though. When she calls me ... which isn’t often, but once or twice a year ... she always asks if I’ve heard anything about you and how you’re doing.”
“Does she ever come back here?” I wanted the answer to be no. I wasn’t sure I could take knowing she’d come to town and not demanded to see me.
“No. Not since she left.” He hesitated. “So you’re living in town now?” Boomer glanced at Mason. “If you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to see you again. Maybe have you come over, meet Millie and the girls. I could even have Tammie drive in for a day.”
“I’d like that.” I leaned into Mason a little more. “Actually, Mason and I are driving into Savannah today to get married. So I’ll be living at his house.”
&n
bsp; “Is that right?” Boomer’s face split into a huge smile. “Well, that’s just great, honey. Mason.” He stuck his hand out, and when Mason grasped it, he pumped it up and down. “Congratulations.”
“Thanks.” Mason stood up and offered me his hand. “Rilla, are you sure you still want to go today? I mean, if you wanted to stay and catch up with Boomer some more, we could wait.”
I shook my head. “No, I don’t want to wait.” Suddenly, it was true. I wanted to go to Savannah with Mason and connect my life with his. Meeting my uncle, realizing I’d had family so close for so long without knowing it—I wanted to be linked to someone. To a family. I didn’t want anyone to be able to tear me away from Piper, and if marrying Mason took care of that, it was just one more good reason.
“Naw, y’all go off and make it official. We have time.” Boomer patted my shoulder a little awkwardly. “I promise, honey, you’re going to have more family than you know what to do with.”
I never would’ve guessed that getting married would end up to be the anti-climatic portion of that day. But as it happened, the ceremony in the courthouse in Savannah was so fast and quiet that it didn’t even feel real.
Mason and I hadn’t said much more on the drive into the city. All of my thoughts were consumed with what I’d learned that morning: I had a family. There were people related to me who’d lived mere miles from me my entire life. They loved me, even when loving me meant doing what was painful for them, because they assumed it was best for me. I was sad that I’d never known my mother’s parents, but I couldn’t wait to meet my cousins. After a lifetime of only my dad and Gram, suddenly I had people. Not only my newly-discovered blood relations, but Piper, Naomi ... and of course, Mason.
I glanced sideways at him. He was paying attention to the road, but his face was relaxed, a slight smile playing over his lips.
“What did your mom say when you told her we were—what we were doing today?”
The smile vanished, and I saw his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed. “I didn’t actually tell her yet. I thought we’d go into the hospital to see her, maybe tomorrow, and we could tell her together.”
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