She’d just turned her back to me when I snagged her hand. She looked down at me, one eyebrow raised.
“You really do look good, Rilla. You look pretty.” I rubbed my thumb over the back of her hand, and she shivered.
“Thank you, Mason.” She stood still for a minute before easing her hand away as my two girls headed downstairs.
Sundays were usually pretty laid-back for me. I went into the club about midday, just to check on things, but I was home in time for dinner, even with a quick stop at the hospital to visit with Mom.
Rilla had made spaghetti, and the three of us devoured it, sitting around the table. I watched Rilla as she moved deftly around my kitchen, and again I had the sense of her belonging. I might’ve thought that meant I only appreciated her cooking, but the truth was, I’d had that same feeling this morning as she stood next to my bed, holding my child. Rilla was part of my life. I wanted her to stay that way.
I took over Piper bathing duty so Rilla could clean up from dinner. I read my daughter two stories, tucked her in and said good night. I’d just clicked off the overhead lamp when she called to me.
“Daddy.”
“Yeah, princess. What do you need?”
“Is Rilla my mama now?”
I hesitated, frozen in the doorway. “Uh, why are you asking, honey?”
“She lives with us, and she loves us, and she takes care of me. Doesn’t that make her my mama?”
“Princess, you know who your mother is. You have her picture right on your dresser.” I glanced over to where the frame sat, but the dark obscured Lu’s laughing face.
“Yeah, but she’s my in-heaven-mama. I need a mama down here, too. Someone like Rilla. So I think she should be my here mama. Is that okay?”
I swallowed over the lump in my throat. It had been three years, and I’d thought I was done losing pieces of Lu. I thought that pain was over. But our daughter had just let go of another piece, something I hadn’t even realized we’d both been clutching. Piper was releasing the idea of a mother she’d never known, so that she could embrace the woman who loved her here and now. I needed to let her do that.
“Of course it’s okay, princess.” I whispered the words. “Your mama—she’d want you to do that. I think she’d love Rilla, too.”
“She does.” Piper spoke with the calm assurance of her three years. “She asked God to send Rilla to us, so she can love us and we can love her.”
“Oh, really?” I frowned. “Who told you that?”
I saw my daughter’s small shoulders lift and fall. “Nobody. I just know. That’s how it works, Daddy.”
“Okay. You go to sleep now, you hear?”
“Yup.” She yawned wide and snuggled back down under the blanket as I closed the door.
Downstairs, Rilla was folding a tea towel over the oven door handle. She looked up with a smile as I can into the room. “She’s in bed?”
“Yeah, all set.” I hooked my thumbs through my belt loops. “You need any help in here?”
“No, thanks. Everything’s cleaned up, and the dishwasher’s running.” She pointed to the machine, as though I didn’t know where it was. We both stood for a minute, neither of us sure what came next.
“Well, I guess I should—”
“Do you want to—”
We spoke simultaneously, and I laughed. “What were you saying?”
“No, nothing. What were you asking me?”
I leaned my hand on the counter. “Do you want to come sit with me in the living room? Watch some television?”
Rilla’s eyes sparked interest, but I couldn’t be sure if she were more interested in my company or the idea of watching TV. She’d been denied access to it growing up, and I’d found she was fascinated with the variety of shows on air. She was a little cautious about what she watched, but I’d caught her enjoying the cooking channel and public television.
“That sounds like fun. What do you want to watch?”
I bit back a grin as I followed her out of the kitchen. If everything went according to my plan, we weren’t going to be really watching anything. But I answered as innocently as I could. “I like history documentaries, and there’s one on tonight about the moon landing.”
“Oh, cool!” Rilla dropped onto the love seat. “I love history.”
I picked up the remote and sat down next to her, just close enough that I could feel the warmth of her body. Flipping around the channels until I came to the right station, I propped my feet onto the ottoman in front of us.
For the first ten minutes of the show, we were quiet, and I didn’t move. When the first commercial came on, I decided it was time for one of my signature moves, one I hadn’t used since I was in high school. I hoped I wasn’t too rusty. This was a classic for a reason, but without finesse, I could screw it up.
Yawning, I stretched my arm over my head and then slowly ... slowly draped it over the back of the love seat. I felt Rilla’s silky hair against the crook of my elbow, but if she noticed, she didn’t give any indication, except for the slightest twitch of her lips. I relaxed until my arm circled her shoulders and my fingers rested on her upper arm.
“You know, we didn’t have a love seat like this growing up.” I kept my voice light, just making small talk.
Rilla turned her head enough to glance at me out of the corner of her eye. “Oh, no?”
“Nah, we had this great big sofa. I loved it. It was the perfect make-out couch.”
Now I had her attention. She shifted, not away from me but so that she could see me better. “You made out on your family sofa?”
“Oh, yeah. From about seventh grade on. I had moves, baby.”
“Did you? Tell me about it. How would you get a girl on the famous make-out couch with you?”
I smirked. “It didn’t take much. I’d just invite her to come over and watch TV with me.”
Realization dawned in those gorgeous blue eyes. “Like maybe a history documentary?”
“Nah, in those days, it’d be music videos. And she’d get here ... sit down with me ... and I’d lead with my signature move. The old arm-stretch and side hold deal.”
Rilla turned her head to deliberately look at my hand where it rested on her shoulder. “Uh huh. And then what?”
“Well, mostly, I’d just hold her this way for maybe a song or two. And then when I couldn’t wait any longer, I’d go like this ...” With my free hand, I reached to touch Rilla’s chin, guiding her face to turn toward me. “And then ... like ... this.”
With the slightest move, I closed the distance between our mouths and sealed mine to hers. Her lips were soft, warm, and oh thank God, welcoming. She made a small noise in the back of her throat and it went through me, igniting such want that I had to tense, hold myself back from forcing her down onto the sofa here and now.
Slow, dude. Take it slow. This is her first kiss. Make it worth remembering.
I slid my other hand, the one not holding her chin, to cup the back of her neck and ease her head to a better angle. She acquiesced, following my lead. I kissed the corners of her mouth and then put the slightest pressure on her chin, tugging it downward and coaxing her lips open. My tongue teased the seam of her lips, tracing and then darting forward to press insistently against small opening until she relaxed a little, letting me in.
I wanted to sweep my tongue into her mouth, but I held back, careful not to scare her. Instead, I touched the very tip to the inside of her lips, making a slow and sensuous line.
When Rilla lifted her hand to lay it alongside my cheek, I slid my fingers from her chin to cover her hand, threading our fingers together so that we could feel our mouths moving against each other. I let my tongue surge forward and stroke the inside of her mouth. She moaned a little and pressed closer to me.
The hand that wasn’t linked with mine against her face moved tentatively to my back, rubbing languorous circles over my shirt. I itched for her slide her fingers underneath and touch my skin, but I wouldn’t push. Not yet.
> We kissed until neither of us could catch our breaths, but I never touched her anywhere else other than her neck and her face. My lips and my tongue explored every crevice of her mouth, and after a bit, her tongue ventured into my mouth. I sucked on it, and she startled, making me smile when she didn’t pull back but stroked her tongue into my mouth again.
I didn’t know how long we made out. I hadn’t done anything like this—just necking with a girl, with no plan to move things along—in too many years for me to remember. There was something sweet and almost erotic about knowing we weren’t going to take it any further than kissing.
Still, my body was beginning to rebel. I wasn’t a fifteen-year old kid who’d never had sex; my cock had been trained to expect more after the hot and heavy kissing. I eased my lips away from Rilla’s, dropping small caresses along her jaw and then leaning my forehead against hers.
“So,” I whispered, staring into her luminous eyes. “Do I still have the moves or what?”
Rilla grinned. “I’m thinking yes. But then again, what do I know? That was my first kiss.” Her breath fanned over my skin. “I think I might need a little more convincing.”
I chuckled. “Sweetheart, I’d love to lay here all night convincing you, but I think we both need some sleep.”
“Hmmmm.” She let her eyes slide shut and laid her head against my shoulder. “I guess you’re right. I might not agree with you tonight, but tomorrow when Piper wakes me up at six, I’ll be thanking you.”
“Oh, that reminds me.” I brushed her hair over her shoulder, rubbing a few soft strands between my two fingers. “Piper asked me tonight if you were going to be her mama. She said her in-heaven mama asked God to send you to us.”
Rilla pushed against my chest and sat up. “I didn’t say anything to her, Mason. I promise. I would never, ever do that.”
“Oh, darlin,’ I know. She told me that’s just the way things work. I wanted to give you a head’s up in case she says something to you.”
“Did it ... did it upset you?”
I leaned back and blew out a long breath. “It’s another tie cut with Lu. Logically, I know she’s gone, but it feels like each time I move ahead, I’m letting her go all over again. As though I’m making the decision to do it.”
“I’m sorry.” Rilla touched my face. “I can’t imagine what it must be like for you, to have someone you loved like you did her ripped away from you. But what I can relate to is how Piper feels. At least to a certain extent. It’s true that Lu didn’t choose to leave her baby, like my mom did, but neither of us remembers having a mother. I look at her little face, and I just want to give her all the love I wanted when I was her age.”
I lifted Rilla’s hand from where it lay on my arm and brought it my lips. “That’s why you’re perfect for her. I’m not upset at all, Rilla. If anything, it just makes me more grateful that you’re in her life.” I turned over her hand and pressed my mouth to her palm. “In our lives.”
After that night, Rilla and I fell into a routine. Every night that I was home before midnight, she waited up for me, and we’d sit on the love seat, watching TV. I found a channel with old series from my childhood and introduced her to them. It was fun to watch her enjoy what I’d loved growing up.
“I don’t understand why my church was so against television. It’s funny, and some of the shows even have a decent moral lesson. And it’s educational.” Rilla was sitting against me, her legs draped over my lap and my arms around her. We were still moving slow. I’d found Rilla loved kissing, and she let me touch her back, her legs, her arms ... I was dying to slide my hands under her shirt, and maybe even unzip her jeans, but I didn’t want to spook her. Not until I was sure she was ready.
“Well, honey, I haven’t shown you everything that’s on here. There’s just as much smut and violence and nastiness as your pastor probably said. You just have to be choosy about you watch.” I ran my finger along the outer seam of her jeans where they clung to her thigh. “Plus, sometimes watching television can lead to activities some people consider wrong.”
She tilted her head so that her hair tickled my neck. “Like ... making out for hours? Kissing ...” She touched her lips to a spot just under my jaw. “Touching ...” She ran her hand over my chest. “ ... inappropriately?”
I caught her hand and held it tight. “I was thinking more about eating junk food and not exercising enough, but I like how your mind works, Mrs. Wallace.”
Rilla giggled, and I watched for the soft glow that always covered her face when I referred to her as my wife or called her by her married name. It was, I mused, an amazing thing to watch her bloom. To blossom from the scared, shy little thing I’d met only a few months ago into a woman with confidence and spunk.
She’d had a few visits with Boomer and his family. The whole clan had come over for dinner one Sunday, much to Rilla’s delight. She’d made a big fried chicken dinner and gotten to know her cousins, her aunt Tammie and Boomer’s wife Millie. I’d loved watching her show off Piper to her family, and Piper drank up every minute of it, being fussed over and spoiled by a whole new crowd of people.
Sadly, Rilla still hadn’t heard a word from her father or her grandmother. I wasn’t surprised about Emmett Grant, but I’d expected more of his mother, from what Rilla had said about her. I was tempted at times to take a ride by their farm and have a little chat, but something held me back. Part of me wondered if Rilla didn’t need this time to heal and grow, without any interference from two people who’d both loved her and bound her for the first two decades of her life.
I teased her that she had a busier social schedule than I did, and it was true. I’d given her my mom’s car to drive for the time being, since Mom wasn’t using it. She and Piper made frequent visits to the farm to hang out with Meghan and Sam. Piper even went along whenever Rilla wanted to work at the stand and I wasn’t home. They’d had a lovely tea out with Mrs. Nelson when Rilla took Piper to see the Nelson horses again.
She continued to implement her promotion plan for the club, but she wouldn’t let me pay her any more. When I’d protested, she’d stood up with her hands on her hips.
“Mason, I’m your wife, right?”
“Seems that way.”
“And what’s yours is mine?”
I smirked. “You want half ownership of the bar, baby? The bar you’re still afraid to actually come visit after four o’clock in the afternoon?”
“You’re getting off topic. Answer my question.”
I groaned. “Okay, yes. Technically, you’re an owner of the bar.”
“So I don’t get paid for doing work for our business.”
I couldn’t argue with her logic, so I just laughed and kissed her until she stopped fussing at me.
She’d taken on Boomer as a client, too, and I’d heard the mechanic bragging to anyone who’d listen that his niece had made him a website. I wasn’t sure how much business it brought the auto repair shop, but it made both Boomer and Rilla happy.
And of course, as long as everyone was healthy, Rilla and Piper went to see my mom in the hospital as often as they could. It was where they’d been planning to go one Friday afternoon after Rilla and I had been married for about a month. I was finishing up at the bar, going over some deliveries and receipts before I left for the evening.
“I think that’s it, boss.” Rocky set down a case of beer. “I’ve got it here. You can head on home to that pretty wife.” He winked at me. Rocky never failed to tease me about my abrupt marriage, crowing his I-told-you-sos until I threatened to fire him.
“Yeah, I’m heading out. Rilla and Piper went to see my mom today, and I want to hear how it went.”
“How’s she doing? Any good news?”
I shrugged. “She’s had a few set-backs, but nothing the doctors didn’t expect, I guess. They haven’t given us a date for her release yet. Her immune system has to recover, but the doctors can’t rush it, or she could have problems with rejecting my stem cells.”
�
��I still think that’s freaky, man. So you gave your mother your stem cells ... and it’s going to heal her?”
I laughed. “Yeah, the marvels of modern medicine, huh? You know, once the new marrow takes over, her blood type will actually change to what mine is. The doctors even said they’ve known cases where the person getting the new stem cells has all new food likes and dislikes. Crazy, isn’t it?”
“No shit. So did it hurt when you gave it?” Rocky eyed me with interest.
I shrugged. “Nope. No more than giving blood. They just set me up with one set of tubes taking blood and another giving it back. The blood went through a machine that separated the stem cells from the rest of the blood.”
“Pretty amazing that you could do that for your mom, huh? She gave you life. Now you gave it back.” He clapped me on the back.
“That’s right.” I stepped out from behind the bar. “Now cross your fingers it takes and she doesn’t reject it. That’s the battle now.”
Rocky nodded. “I got her on my church’s prayer chain. Our pastor always says, you need prayer, you get the old ladies on it. And we got lots of old ladies on our prayer chain.”
“Every little bit helps.” I paused. “Rocky, where do y’all go to church?”
“Ah, First Methodist on Barnam Street.”
“Can I ask you something? At your church, do they let the kids date? And are y’all allowed to watch TV?”
Rocky squinted at me. “Yeah. The kids date, and man, they better not tell me I can’t watch baseball. Why?’
I shook my head. “Nothing. Just the church Rilla grew up going to—it’s really strict. I think she’d like to find some place to go in town, but I don’t want her getting mixed up in another bad situation, you know?”
Rocky nodded. “Burton Community, right? Yeah, we hear things. We get people coming to our church who left that one, saying it was a little too much.” He lifted one shoulder. “Hey, listen, to each his own. But if Rilla ever wants to come with us, just have her call my wife. We’d love to have her.” He winked at me. “You too, boss. If they let a guy like me in, they might even bend the rules enough for a dude like you.”
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