The Overdue Life of Amy Byler

by Kelly Harms

  I know from your article you read a lot, but when my momspringa comes, I am going to go to the movies every day, because I haven’t been to a movie since my first daughter was born, and I don’t even remember what movie-theater popcorn smells like. I just remember, a long time ago, how much I used to love going to the movies. My friend Calla is going to spend her time in the swimming pool. She used to be a masters swimmer, but the only gym in town with childcare doesn’t have a pool. Noelle has a little boy who just weaned, so she says she just wants to sleep the whole week, but I bet once she catches up on sleep a little, she’ll have enough energy at least to take a few nice long walks or read a good book. And my best friend, Anne, well, she is taking her guitar.

  Amy, none of us have family nearby, and not all of us have very sympathetic partners right now, and until your article came out, it just never occurred to us that it would somehow be possible to take a few days to ourselves, much less that it would be “ok.” But after we read your story, we knew it wasn’t just ok for moms to take breaks—it was required. So thank you so much for being brave and giving us the push we needed.

  Sincerely,

  The Monday Mamas, Baraboo, Wisconsin

  —

  Dear Pure Beautiful magazine,

  I would like to write to register my disappointment—nay, my outrage—at your irresponsible hero worship of that pathetic excuse for a mother you featured in your article about mothers running away from their responsibilities. I realize that you have to sell magazines, and that means your pages will be full of sex and other abominations, but to discover a seven-page (!) article about a woman who abandoned her OWN CHILDREN to a man who was virtually a complete stranger, only to jump into the beds of every man in New York City and spend her every waking moment worried about “makeovers” and “health clubs,” goes well past even the worst thing I could have prepared myself for. What if your article causes other women, normally good, responsible women, to do the same? Did you ever think of that before putting this dangerous article into print? The thought is nothing short of REVOLTING. Shame, shame on you, Pure Beautiful magazine. Think of the children.

  Please cancel my subscription immediately.

  Sincerely,

  Deborah Stuckey, Phoenix, Arizona

  —

  SEARCH: TOP TWEETS featuring #mymomspringa

  @eatpraysway

  I’d take #mymomspringa in New York just like that lady but I would wear way better clothes. @purebeautymag

  @themommymess

  #mymomspringa: just one big bed, a dark cool room, occasional room service. wine.

  @lawyerrenee

  I would kill for #mymomspringa. I’d go to stay with my childless friend at her lake house in the middle of nowhere. See how the other half lives. Maybe learn to sail. No, I’d just nap.

  @momofmatt

  Even just thinking about #mymomspringa makes me happy. Two weeks till the beach, baby! Thanks @purebeautymag for starting the convo.

  @noahthefarmer

  Can I have a #dadspringa? My baby isn’t born yet but my wife is working constantly on her new cookbook and I need to escape kitchen duty. #mymomspringa

  @neanknowsnothing replied:

  @noahthefarmer No.

  @georgieporgie3

  #mymomspringa would be in Venice. No, screw Venice. Tuscany. With that guy from the movie. And Matt Damon #backupplan

  @kathryninchicago

  #mymomspringa is: Literally anywhere my children are not. #realtalk

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  I’d like to thank Chris Werner, Tiffany Yates Martin, and the inspired team at Lake Union for getting this story into the world with such enthusiasm and verve. Holly Root, you are wonderful.

  I’m very grateful to all my friends whose support and expertise made writing this book possible, especially Abbie Foster Chaffee, Kris Adams, Jennifer Ferreter, Mandy McGowan, Sara Naatz, Dr. Sandra Block, Lexy Spry, and Aimie K. Runyan. Thanks, too, for all the readers who were in touch between books. You are so inspiring.

  To the Tall Poppy Writers, my gratitude and adoration. Thanks to Griffin Wimmer for listening to audiobooks while I edited and Sally Harms for hosting Grandma Camp while I edited. To my son’s guides at Isthmus Montessori; our extended family, related and otherwise; and all the moms I’ve met in the last seven years who have inspired me to tell this story, my deepest appreciation. To Chris Meadow, my thanks and love are as bottomless as the beermosas at Karben4.

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Photo © 2018 Lea Wolf

  Kelly Harms is an author, a mother, and a big dreamer. She lives in Madison, Wisconsin, with her sparkling son, Griffin; her fluffy dog, Scout; and her beloved Irishman, Chris. Before this midwestern life, she lived in New York, New York, and worked with many of her author-heroes as an editor at HarperCollins and then as a literary agent. When she’s not lost in a book that she’s either writing or reading, you can find her on the water, in the water, or near the water. Say hello anytime at www.kellyharms.com.