The Pretenders

by Rebecca Hanover

  I spend the next two days alone, watching old films and eating the worst junk food I can find in our pantry. Alone in my empty house, feeling so isolated I’m this close to asking Dash and Genevieve to watch a movie with me, I’m beyond relieved when I get a buzz from Ansel, reporting that he’s been hanging out with Archer and his dads over the holiday. Trimming the tree, going for a hike up to the Hollywood Hills. He shares a snapshot of him and Archer in sneakers, taking in the fresh air. Archer’s arm is draped lazily around Ansel’s shoulders, and they both look pretty content. I’m happy for Ansel. He deserves a family, even if it’s complicated.

  Theodora buzzes that she’s spent a five-star holiday with Frederica Leroy and Tessa in Manhattan, but I can sense the sarcasm even in her written words. Maude also buzzes with a chipper “Merry Christmas to us” that makes me miss my friends so much, I almost can’t stand it.

  Staring down the twinkly tree in our vast living room, lacking any wrapped presents nestled beneath it, it occurs to me that right now, I understand my friends’ lonely existence more than I ever realized.

  • • •

  When I return to Darkwood after the break, I’ve submitted all fourteen of my college applications, and I’ve completed video holo-calls with several of the schools that require interviews for admission. I’ve received a couple of buzzes from Ollie, mostly photos with funny captions that don’t really tell me much about what’s actually on his mind.

  I miss him, and I feel so anxious about what things will be like when we both return to school. I also miss Levi. I want to ask him what he did over the break, and whether he missed me. I know I can’t, though, and won’t.

  I arrive at the circular drive on the Thursday after New Year’s Day. We’ll have the long weekend to get settled before classes resume. I’m alone in my room, unpacking, when I see the envelope from my father sticking out of the side pocket of my suitcase. I’d forgotten it was there. I yank it out, ripping it open along the edge.

  Inside is a printout for two plane tickets. A summer graduation trip to Europe. My dad has scrawled a handwritten note.

  Just us. No work, no plums. Are you in? Love, Dad

  I feel my pulse catching in my throat. It’s an olive branch, I’m sure of it. Last year, I would have been cautiously optimistic a trip like that would be a fresh start for us. But now, I wonder if it can make up for everything that’s transpired between us? I don’t know.

  “You aren’t seriously considering heading to Italy for the first time in your life without me?” a voice behind me demands.

  I whirl and see Ollie standing there, holding his rolling bag by the handle.

  Relief floods my body. He’s here, making a joke. He’s not mad. At least, he’s not acting like it.

  “Snoop much?” I tease, running up and hugging him, careful to pull away quickly. “How was your trip—”

  “How was home—”

  We both laugh.

  “Jinx,” I say, wheeling his bag inside and praying we can have some semblance of normal. At least for a little while. I need my best friend right now. I can’t bear the idea of us not talking, not hanging out like always. “Harry Potter movie marathon?” I suggest.

  “Do you really have to ask?” he teases.

  Pru’s out training with her crew team, so Ollie and I settle on my bed with a tablet and Sorcerer’s Stone. This is normal. This is nice. Like old times. We can easily get through Prisoner of Azkaban by dinnertime.

  It’s easy, sitting here with Ollie, leaning on the wall that forms one side of my twin bed. I’ve got the tablet on my knees, and his own are crunched up between his elbows. I notice in that moment how small the bed seems, and how tall Ollie is. Things could not be more loaded and complicated between us. But this is how it should be. Us, as friends.

  Only friends.

  Then why do you feel a zing up and down your spine, sitting here so close to him?

  I swat that thought away and try to focus on Harry and Hermione and Hogwarts.

  But I’m distracted when I notice Ollie checking his plum. “You expecting a super-urgent message?”

  “Nope, just seeing what time it is.”

  “It’s 3:52 p.m., last time I checked,” I quip. He looks guiltily away from his wrist.

  A minute passes, and now he’s pressing pause on the movie.

  “That was fun.” He stretches his legs. “More tomorrow?” he asks, slipping on his sweater.

  “More tomorrow?” I look at him like he’s lost it. “Are you kidding me? They’ve literally just gotten past Fluffy.”

  “And then they’ll play wizard’s chess, and Ron will get knocked out, and don’t pretend you haven’t seen this forty-seven hundred times.” He laughs.

  “I thought we were going to watch all of them,” I protest feebly. I know I’m trying to hold on to some normalcy. I cling to it because right now, it’s the only thing that feels stable and safe. “That’s what movie marathon means. It’s not a marathon if it’s two-thirds of a film!”

  But Ollie’s already slipping on his sneakers. “Em, chill. It’s not a big deal.”

  “I just don’t understand what’s so important you can’t watch the end with me,” I say, feeling myself getting riled.

  “Stuff, Emma,” Ollie says, all of a sudden sounding testy and cryptic. I stare at him, surprised. I’d been teasing him before, giving him a hard time. But now he’s being downright standoffish.

  He moves to the door. “Wait,” I say, leaping from the bed and nearly tripping in my socks. “I’m sorry. I was just messing with you.”

  “Emma,” he says sternly. “I have. To go.” He yanks open the door and leaves.

  I sigh, pressing play on the movie. At least I can lose myself in Hogwarts for thirty more minutes. But deep down, I’m worried. Have I ruined everything between us? Dug a chasm between us that’s so wide, we’ll never bridge it again?

  A few hours later, I’m heading toward the dining hall with Pru, Maude, and the others, but not Ollie. And Levi’s not with us, either. I don’t know where he is, but I’m equal parts relieved and disappointed that he’s not here. Theodora’s filling us in on her awkward holiday with the Leroys, including their fancy Christmas meal at Gramercy Tavern. I’m only half listening.

  But when I reach the entrance, something grabs my attention. Hanging from the double doors of the dining hall is a blown-up photo of me. Scrawled across my torso, in a messy blood-red script, is one giant word: CLONE.

  Retaliation

  We all know who did it. It was Harlowe and her crew. I study the picture for two seconds before stoically moving right past it and snagging a table with my friends. There are the usual snickers and comments all around us—Darkwood students can’t resist an opportunity for gossip—but we stay in our tight-knit group, only leaving the security of our table to grab trays of food.

  “I’m calling a midnight session,” Maude says, interrupting our silent chewing. She stands up, abruptly, rapping a knife on her glass. “Attention, everyone. I have a short announcement. Members of the Nine—I mean, Ten. Our tenth member has returned, I almost forgot—please convene in the Tower Room tonight for the first midnight session of the New Year.” She sits back down and digs into her tacos.

  I hear a commotion by the double doors. Someone has ripped down the poster of me. I squint and see that person crumpling it up and walking toward the recycling bin with it.

  It’s Levi. I hear whispers about how he’s my boyfriend. That of course he had to defend Emma’s honor. They’re a couple.

  I bristle at the words, and heat rises through my chest, moving to my outer extremities. When he walks over to our table with a tray, joining us, I’m angry. I don’t need him to be my champion. I was diplomatically ignoring that sign and showing this whole damn school I’m above all this.

  Levi’s chosen a spot at the table directly across from m
e.

  “I couldn’t stand it,” he explains. “I was worried if I didn’t take it out on the sign…” He shrugs. “I would do something a lot worse.”

  We don’t talk after that. I pick at my dinner, wondering where Ollie is, suddenly nauseous about how we left things earlier today. Is it my imagination, or was Ollie being particularly quiet? Avoiding serious topics, trying to get the whole movie marathon over with? And then leaving so abruptly like he did? Am I completely overreacting? Or is there some chance he’s so hurt by what I did, by how I reacted to that kiss, he can’t even stand to be around me?

  I’m so relieved when Ollie slides into a seat next to me—until I remember Levi’s right across from us.

  “I would love to walk up to that girl right now and give her a piece of my mind,” Ollie grumbles. He means Harlowe. He must have seen the poster before Levi ripped it down.

  “What is wrong with you two?” I set my water glass down with a thud. “Both of you. Yes, you, Levi. And you, Ollie. Do you think I can’t take care of myself?”

  They both stare at me like I’ve lost my mind—then both of them smile, exchanging an eye roll. That only makes me angrier.

  “I will deal with Harlowe, thank you very much.” I grab my tray and leave the table, bussing it and exiting into the blustery night air.

  Late that night, waiting in the Tower Room with Pippa, Theodora, Maude, and Levi for the junior Ten members to arrive, I refuse to meet Levi’s eyes. I can’t believe he and Ollie shared that look, like they were in cahoots. Like they think I can’t fight my own battles.

  I’m tired after my long day traveling cross-country, despite being on California time. But I’m hit with a jolt of energy the moment Harlowe and the other juniors walk in the room, with Harlowe leading the charge. I notice Sophie and Willa; they trail the other three, hesitant. I can only hope they haven’t gone over to the dark side.

  “Things are really coming along in our planning for the rally,” Harlowe announces to the group gleefully as she plops in a chair. “Too bad none of you are DAAM members.” She shrugs. “You’re really missing out.” Her eyes scan the circle, finally landing on mine. “Oh, hey. Good thing your boyfriend rode in like a knight in shining armor this evening,” Harlowe says to me coolly. She has no idea how much that comment rankles me. But I don’t let on.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about. All I saw was that poster,” I answer her, emotion absent from my voice. “And it spoke for itself.”

  “Did it?” Harlowe asks, shooting Ivy a look. “Because there’s a lot more it could have said, besides ‘clone.’” She pretends to pick a piece of lint from her jeans. “Maybe the next poster will be more explicit. Like detailing how you leaped from that boathouse roof like someone possessed.”

  I stare at her, my wheels turning.

  It was her. The person standing behind the trees watching me that day. I knew it.

  “I already let the colleges know, so you can thank me later,” Harlowe adds.

  “Let the colleges know what?” I feel my entire body tensing, like a rubber band about to snap.

  “About your suicidal tendencies.” She shrugs. “No one attempts a daredevil stunt like that unless they want to die—”

  “That is so horribly offensive, I could slap you,” I snap at her. “Suicide isn’t a joke. When we thought Ollie…” I stop myself, feeling my throat clog up like cotton has been stuffed there. I am not discussing that most personal and hellish time of my life, and Ollie’s, with this spiteful girl.

  “The only other possibility is that you knew you wouldn’t hurt yourself, because you’re so freakishly inhuman that you can leap from a building without a scratch,” Harlowe goes on, her eyes boring into mine. “I’m sure Oxford really wants a half-human cyborg freak walking its campus.”

  I stand up, about to walk right up to Harlowe and punch her in the face. If there were ever a time to read her thoughts again—to hear exactly what’s in that twisted mind of hers so I could use it against her—that time would be now.

  Before I know what’s happening, I feel tingly all over. I barely register that my friends are defending me, because I’m inside Harlowe’s head.

  Freak. They’re all freaks. Which is why the colleges they’ve applied to are going to love all that footage I sent them of Tessa running around half naked on Darkwood’s campus. I bet Theodora won’t get in anywhere since I told them it’s her. And Maude’s prospects are going to be pretty bad once the schools find out how many time she’s broken Darkwood rules. Hacking into every system out there—

  “You bitch,” I hiss at Harlowe. There. I’ve said it. I am done being nice; I am done being civil. “All you’ve wanted, this entire year, has been to run us out of school. Or to drive us to total humiliation. Or to get my friends deported.”

  “But not you, Eden?” Harlowe asks innocently. “You’ve admitted you were born on Castor Island. Which makes you…oh, right. Not a citizen of this lovely country at all.”

  “You won’t get away with it,” I say, ignoring that last comment. “That video, that was Tessa, not Theodora.” I don’t tell her it was a Duplicate. I’m not getting into that right now. “Using it to derail Theodora’s college applications is a totally evil thing to do.” As soon as I’ve said it, I realize it’s too late. I’ve given myself away.

  Harlowe stares at me, and for the first time ever, she’s rendered speechless.

  How does she know about that? I never said anything. It’s like she could read my mind. But that’s insane—no one can do that.

  I don’t flinch. I don’t let on for a second that I’m continuing to hear everything that’s in her head. It’s a standoff of sorts, until Levi steps up next to me, and I can feel the outrage radiating off his every cell. It’s sexy as hell, but I don’t need him defending me.

  “Don’t,” I say to him. “She’s not worth it.”

  “Sorry to interrupt,” says a voice, and we all turn, surprised, to see a figure standing in the doorway. It’s Jane. My mind is spinning. This is the first time I’ve ever seen a teacher, or any adult at all, stop by a midnight session. “Harlowe Shaw, Ivy Li, and Graham Rosen? Please come with me,” Jane says with authority.

  Harlowe’s eyes flit to Graham’s and then Ivy’s. They seem as surprised as she is.

  “What for?” Harlowe asks.

  “A student videoed the three of you hanging that sign on the cafeteria door,” Jane explains, crossing her arms over her chest. “As you know, that kind of display of intolerance is not to be abided at Darkwood. Not while I’m in charge. Maude? Is this meeting dismissed?”

  Maude can barely contain her smile. “It is now.”

  Harlowe and her cohorts grumble as they file out of the Tower Room, following Jane.

  “Should we go now?” Sophie asks. Willa twists her hair awkwardly. These two may have a moral compass, but they could use some confidence.

  “You’re dismissed too,” Maude answers. Sophie and Willa leave.

  The rest of us try to process what just happened.

  “Who recorded the video from the cafeteria?” Pippa asks.

  I shrug. “Someone who really wanted to see those kids put in their place. Nice work, whoever you are.”

  “Emma—what did you mean by footage of Tessa?” Theodora asks. “And my college apps?”

  I twist my hands in the fabric of my shirt. It’s now or never, I guess.

  “I read Harlowe’s thoughts,” I say briskly, wanting to say this before I chicken out. “It’s happened before,” I explain quickly, “but never on purpose. The first time was the night she locked you up in the pump house. That’s how I knew you were there. Tonight, I was so, I don’t know, angry, I willed myself to hear what she was thinking. And it wasn’t good,” I add. I explain more about how she’s planning to derail Theodora and Maude’s college apps with “evidence” that they aren’t
the shining students they purport to be. Mine too.

  “This is what Gravelle always talked about,” Pippa speaks up.

  “What is?” I press.

  Levi deflates, and I remember he’s standing there next to me. Not that I ever could forget. I only force myself to ignore the electricity that thrums through me any time we’re in a room together, in spite of everything. “He was obsessed, Emma,” he says, turning to face me. “With this idea of us conquering all human physical limitations…”

  “And all mental ones,” Pippa supplies. “None of us ever got to that point, of being successful at brain-to-brain communication. I think Gravelle was always angry about that, and disappointed. He’d let you go, to live with your dad, and I think he always knew you were the one who got away.”

  “The special one,” Levi adds. “The one with this unique ability to control your mind. And see into others’.”

  “I hate it,” I confess to them. “For the most part, it makes me find out stuff I absolutely do not want to know. Ever,” I add. “If this keeps up, I’ll be sitting on thousands of secrets by the time I die. Maybe more—”

  “Not if you learn to control it, like you just did,” Maude cuts in. “If you think of it that way—like a skill you can hone and practice and control—then you can use it only when you really want to. When you have a good reason to. Like just now.”

  “What good did it do us?” I complain. “So now we know Harlowe’s planning to screw you over so you can’t get into college.”

  “We can try to stop her,” Pippa says softly.

  “And at the very least, write to those colleges to explain that there’s been a mix-up. A mistake,” Maude adds.

  “You did good, Emma,” Theodora tells me with a wry smile. I don’t return it.

  “She knows,” I tell them. “She knows she didn’t say anything out loud about that college admissions stuff.”

  “So what?” Maude scoffs. “Let her have a field day with this. We’re stronger than she is. Smarter. And you have the most useful skill of all.”