CHAPTER XLII.
Little is left to be told now. The sick man occasionally rallied, and heloved to dwell like most old men of every station in life, upon hispast. He was also given to occasional fits of boasting, and when he diddo anything he took good care to let all the world know it. "Did you seethat!" he would cry out in an ecstasy of delight. "Did you see themighty blow I struck? Never in my palmiest days did I do better. Hide,hide your diminished heads, ye Ramillies, Malplaquet, and Waterloo."These famous battles he loved to talk about.
He also took a strange delight in showering upon all his people allkinds of honours or distinctions, and it was said that men weredecorated for doing little or nothing. This was a symptom of decay.
Sometimes as he sat pillowed up in his invalid's chair, with the greatquack doctor in attendance upon him, he would mumble to himself, "Aye,aye, I knew thee well. There was Wallop, he swept the seas. There wasbrave Howard, Hawkins, Frobisher, and the rest, and you, my little man!No, no, I've not forgotten Trafalgar and the Nile. Don't you rememberthem all, Jack? Jack! Jack! where's my cox'sn, he never used to play thetruant," but Jack never answered to his call, and the old man wanderedon. "Clack, clack go my windlasses; yo! ho! cry my men. Heave in, mylads. Sheet home and hoist up, and bear away for the main."
The great quack smiled as he glanced his eyes up at the long row ofshelves, with their burdens of remedies, all of which had beenprescribed to meet some fresh complaint, and many a costly dose had beengiven, which only aggravated the disease; and of many of the others, allthat could be said was, that if they did no good, they at least did noharm; but the straight waistcoat every day received some slightaddition, which contracted still more the old Buccaneer's actions, untilin time he could scarcely call his soul his own.
Thus did this great man pass his declining years. Ruled over by atyrannical quack. Worried by his own children, to whom he had givenevery indulgence, at the recommendation of Madam Liberty, until it couldwith justice be said that they one and all combined to bring the oldBuccaneer's grey hairs with sorrow to the grave.
It is usual in all books, and it is even necessary before you close yourpages to kill some of the characters, if not all. Sometimes they die anatural death, at others they are either blown up with gun-powder, orotherwise made away; either with the steel blade, or the leaden bulletof the assassin. The characters who have strutted for a brief space uponthe pages of this history must be allowed to die peacefully. The star ofDogvane, the king of the Ojabberaways, after resting for a short whileover the green isle of his adoption, set forever in the Western Ocean.His chief jester, the merry Pepper, the man of infinite wisdom andresource, also passed away. Dogvane was never allowed to carry out hisgrand design of covering the naked population of the Soudan in home-madefabrics. Nor was the cook soothed in his last moments by seeing theobject of his life accomplished, namely, the total abolition of theBuccaneer's Upper Chamber; consequently we cannot imagine that his endwas peace.
It is a pity that Death is no respecter of persons; had he been, thegifted Pepper, would, no doubt, have been spared to amuse and enlightenthe world. Of the other conspirators of the cook's caboose, after havingserved their allotted time, they also passed away, and it is notrecorded that Billy Cheeks, before he died, set fire to the waters ofthe river that flowed by the Buccaneer's chief city. The carpenter rosehigh in his master's household, and carried to his grave a goodly loadof honour. Of the rest, let history tell what truth or what lies itlikes, here no more will be recorded. It will be remembered that ourbold Buccaneer was at one time sorely grieved because he only had onegeneral. This seemed to prey so upon his mind in his last days, that hetried to make amends for his past neglect by making generals by thescore, whether they were fitted for the position or not; nor did theBuccaneer stop here, for he gave military titles to nearly all his sons,in the hope, no doubt, that amongst the crowd there might be onemilitary genius, or perhaps two.
But stranger things were yet in store for the world, and a graversymptom of decaying power had yet to manifest itself. It has beenalready said that no man ever did more to degrade noble distinctions andmarks of honour than did this, at one time, celebrated Buccaneer, in hisdeclining years. It is true that he had not sunk quite so low as one ofhis neighbours, who sold such things for a mere money consideration; buthe had in his latter years gone some considerable way even in thisdirection, for he had made money a stepping-stone to preferment. The onewho placed drunkenness within easy reach of his people, might reasonablyexpect to be made a peer. The successful oil-man, or grocer, who hadmade his five talents into ten, need not despair of earning the at onetime honourable distinction of knighthood, while any one who served hisparty well, even if it were to the discredit of his country, was prettycertain to be ennobled. The number of new creations was so great, thathis heraldic officers were nearly worn-out with finding ancestors andpedigrees for all these great people, and it was wonderful what thingstheir industry, and their ingenuity, brought to light. Frequently theyfollowed the poet's art and gave "to airy nothing a local habitation anda name."
Had he promoted all his cooks to seats in the Council Chamber it wouldnot have been so very extraordinary a thing, considering the part thatcooks play in this world of ours. The Buccaneer now put a climax to hisfolly by one day making all his tinkers lords, and all his tailorsknights. Whether this was done in a spirit of irony, or from a deepconviction that, as he had gone so far, he could not in justice draw anyhard and fast line, will never be known. He was without doubt the besttinker the world had ever seen, and he had a very large show oftinkered pots, pans, and kettles, always on hand, but many thought hemight have stopped here.
These last acts were considered to be of so grave a nature that thepriest took the place of the doctor, and when this happens little elseremains to be told.
Before closing the pages of this history, another catastrophe must berecorded. In one of those storms which were of frequent occurrence inthe Buccaneer's island, the old Church Hulk, which had ridden alongsideof the Ship of State for so many years in fair weather and in foul,slipped her moorings one dark night, either by accident, or otherwise,and she drifted on to the rocks of discord, and being broken up wasplundered; her own crew being fortunate enough to save some of her cargoof riches for themselves. After all was over they set to work to accuseand abuse each other. Some indeed expressed open satisfaction at whathad happened, for the discipline on board the old Church Ship had longbeen too severe for them, and signs of mutiny and insubordination hadlong been manifest, as has been already shown. These felt that now theycould worship their God how they liked, when they liked, and in whatcostume they liked; and those who wished it, and there were not a few,could even worship more gods than one.
The loss of the Church Ship was put down to various causes by her crew.Some said it was the work of the devil; others said it was through thewickedness of men; but very few of them thought of applying tothemselves the proverb, which the old coxswain and his master hadbrought from the Spanish Main.
The Life of a Celebrated Buccaneer Page 42