The Roommate Arrangement

by Jae

  Steph’s mouth watered at the heavenly scents that started to drift through the kitchen. “Yum. Where did you learn how to cook? Your parents?”

  “Kind of,” Rae said.

  Steph waved her hand at her to keep going. Sometimes, getting Rae to talk was like getting a square to roll. You had to keep nudging.

  “My parents were into vegan health food decades before it was a trend, so they had to make everything themselves,” Rae said. “They also never stuck to any schedule. There were no set meal times at our house—if we even had a house—so if I was hungry, I made my own food.”

  “No house?” Steph asked. “You mean you lived in an apartment?”

  “No. My parents led a pretty nomadic lifestyle. When I was little, we lived in a commune up north for a while, and before my brother was born, we even lived in an RV and went from one craft fair to the next. I spent most of my childhood running around half-naked and barefoot, without any boundaries.”

  “Wow. That must have been great. I wish my parents had been more like that. They believed in clear rules, so I spent most of my childhood in my room, grounded.” Steph chuckled.

  Rae turned off the stove and pulled the ciabatta from the oven. While the bread cooled a little, she leaned against the counter, her strong arms folded across her chest. “It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows, believe me. My parents had this it-will-all-work-out mentality and never planned for anything. There was zero structure. Sometimes, I felt like the only adult in the family, even at twelve.”

  Steph thought about it for a while. Maybe having so much freedom and getting to make your own decisions at such an early age wasn’t always a good thing. She could imagine Rae must have felt adrift in the ocean of life. “Is that why you became a cop? Because it gave you laws and rules and structure to cling to?”

  Rae busied herself putting the steak, the peppers, and the onion on the ciabatta and then whipped up a sauce from mayo and mustard that she drizzled over it, along with some chopped-up herbs. Just when Steph thought that she wouldn’t get an answer, Rae slid the plate with the sandwich across the counter and said, “I never thought about it that way, but that was probably part of it. Plus it was my way of rebelling against my parents.”

  “Rebelling by becoming a police officer?” Steph jumped down from the counter and carried the plate to the breakfast bar.

  “Yeah, well… Can you think of anything two born-twenty-years-too-late hippies would hate more than for their daughter to become part of the establishment?”

  “Right.” Steph pressed down on the two halves of the ciabatta to make it more manageable and took a big bite. The juicy meat, the slight sweetness of the peppers, the tang of the mustard, the fresh, peppery taste of the basil, and the crunchy bread blended together in perfect harmony. She let out a long moan. “Oh my God,” she said around a mouthful of sandwich, “I think I just had a foodgasm.”

  Rae rubbed her earlobe. “Um, thanks. I’ll take it as a compliment.”

  “It totally was.” Steph licked a bit of mustard sauce off her fingers.

  Rae turned away and started cleaning up the kitchen.

  Had there been a hint of red on her cheeks for the third time since 1997? Cute. Steph grinned to herself but decided not to tease her for once. “Leave it. You cooked; I’ll clean…as soon as I’m done with the new love of my life.”

  After a second of hesitation, Rae set down the cutting board she’d just picked up and climbed onto the barstool across from Steph.

  “Um…” Steph looked back and forth between the sandwich and the woman who had prepared it for her. It was a sacrifice but one she was prepared to make. “You want half?”

  “No, thanks. All yours.”

  Steph didn’t have to be told twice. She basically inhaled the rest of the sandwich and only slowed down on the last few bites. “So your brother… Is he the same? Craving structure?”

  “No. He’s great, but we don’t have much in common.”

  “I know what you mean. I love my sister, but sometimes, I can’t believe we’re related.” Steph popped a piece of steak that had fallen off into her mouth. “So what does your brother do? Is he an artist too, like your parents?”

  “Kind of. Darrin is a theatrical designer.”

  “A what?”

  “He creates stage sets on Broadway, so we don’t see each other a lot,” Rae said.

  “Oh wow. So you’re the only straitlaced one in the family.”

  Rae glowered at her. “I’m not straitlaced…or straight.”

  “Or so you keep saying.” Steph swiped her finger through the puddle of mustard sauce on her now-empty plate and slid it into her mouth. “Sounds like we were both born into the wrong family. Hey, maybe we should switch. I’ll go spend Christmas with your folks, and you join mine. I have a feeling that would be a much better fit.”

  Rae shook her head. “Wouldn’t work.”

  “Why not?” Steph asked. “Christmas at my folks’ is the same procedure every year. My mom has starters on the table at two thirty and the main course at three and not one second later. Lots of structure there. You’d like it.”

  “Maybe, but the other part of your plan isn’t going to work because my parents don’t celebrate Christmas. They’re not fans of organized religion.”

  Steph shrugged. “Neither am I, but I still enjoy it for the presents and the food…and even for spending time with my family, though I wouldn’t admit that if you try to get me to repeat it to their faces.” She studied Rae across the breakfast bar. “So what will you do on Christmas?”

  “Work, I guess.”

  “That’s only in the evening. What are you doing before?”

  “I don’t know.” Rae squirmed as if the questioning was making her uncomfortable. “Nothing special.”

  As much as Steph complained about her family, she couldn’t imagine not seeing them on Christmas and spending the day alone. She dabbed at the lone bread crumbs on her plate. Should she invite Rae to join her and her family for dinner? She had never taken anyone home for the holidays, not wanting her current fling to ascribe a level of commitment to the gesture that Steph didn’t mean. But she and Rae weren’t involved, so it should be okay, right? “Um, would you…uh…?”

  “What?” A rare smile crinkled the edges of Rae’s eyes. “Make you a second sandwich? You liked it that much?”

  “No. I mean, yes, I did, but…um…” Christ. Out with it. You sound like a teenager asking her crush out. Steph gave herself a mental kick. “Do you want to come home with me for Christmas?”

  Rae arched her brows. “Isn’t that taking our fake relationship a little too far?”

  This time, Steph didn’t join in on the joking. “If you’d rather not, I understand, but I’m actually serious about the offer.”

  “Oh.” The smile on Rae’s face disappeared. She rubbed her neck and glanced down at the breakfast bar. “I don’t know, Steph. People and I don’t usually mix very well.”

  “They aren’t people. They’re my family. And you already know Claire and Lana. You’re not scared of having dinner with three psychologists, are you?”

  Rae looked up and squinted over at her. “Are you trying one of their psych tricks on me by issuing a challenge?”

  Damn, was she that transparent, or did Rae know her better than she’d thought already? “Maybe a little.” Steph nearly reached across the breakfast bar to squeeze Rae’s hand but stopped herself. “But seriously, the offer stands. You don’t have to decide now. Just think about it.”

  “Okay.” Rae slid off the barstool. “I’m off to bed now. It’s getting late.”

  “Good night. Sleep well.” Steph watched her go. “Oh, and Rae? Thanks again for the sandwich.”

  “You’re welcome.” The door closed behind Rae, leaving Steph to wonder if it had been a mistake to invite her. Had she harmed their tentative fri
endship?

  That was what was happening between them, right? They were becoming friends. Since she’d been on the road so much, it had been a while since Steph had made a new friend—and admittedly never someone she was attracted to. Her sister would probably tell her it was a character-building experience.

  Steph snorted and went to clean the kitchen.

  CHAPTER 15

  Two days later, on Thursday afternoon, Steph waited in the back of a ballroom while the CEO of the construction company that had hired her for their holiday party announced her. There was no stage, but at least the lighting and the sound seemed halfway decent, so she hoped this corporate gig wouldn’t turn out as bad as some of the others she had done.

  “One more thing before we get to the entertainment,” the CEO said into the microphone. “By now, most of you have probably heard about what happened to Jack.”

  A murmur went through the ballroom.

  “For those of you who haven’t: He was run over by a dump truck on Monday morning. The driver was backing up and didn’t see him. Jack died on the spot. So please, be more careful. No standing around at a construction site while you’re taking a cigarette break.” The CEO put on a forced smile. “Now let’s get to the fun part of the evening. We hired a comedian for tonight’s entertainment. Please welcome the very funny Stephanie Renshaw.”

  Only years of listening to the most messed-up introductions kept Steph’s jaw from hitting the floor. This one took the cake by far. They seriously expected her to do stand-up after that announcement? Jeez, and people thought she was tactless!

  Barely anyone applauded as she made her way to the front of the room since everyone was busy whispering about what had happened to poor Jack.

  Steph took a deep breath and accepted the microphone from the CEO.

  Somehow, she made it through the hour-long routine. She even managed to make most of the employees laugh a time or two, but this one wouldn’t go down in history as her most successful show.

  Why am I doing this again? Oh yeah, that’s right. Because it paid ten times the amount she got for a spot at the club. Mentally exhausted but with an envelope full of cash, she made her way back to the car. She climbed into the driver’s seat and sat there for a while without starting the engine.

  Maybe she should call Penny to see if she wanted to meet up for a drink. She hadn’t seen her best friend in a while, partly because she was working her ass off, taking any gig she could get, and partly because she had spent more time at home since moving in with Rae.

  Never in a million years would she have thought she would enjoy spending time with someone as reserved as Rae, but she did.

  When her phone vibrated, she pulled it from her pocket and glanced at the screen.

  Penny.

  The first real smile all afternoon formed on Steph’s lips. Talking to her best friend always cheered her up, so she swiped her finger across the screen. “Hey, Penny. I was just thinking about calling you. Are you telepathic?”

  “Um, if I am, it’s a newly developed skill that I’m not aware of.”

  “Want to meet up for a drink somewhere? I just had the shittiest corporate gig ever.”

  Penny sighed. “I wish I could. I could really use a drink too, but I’m pet-sitting overnight.”

  “Want me to pick up a six-pack and come over?”

  “No, I’m not at home. I’m at the client’s.”

  “Damn,” Steph muttered. “Adulting is no fun, is it?”

  Another deep sigh drifted through the phone. “Sure isn’t today. Um, listen, Steph, there’s something I have to tell you. I didn’t want you to find out when you log in to the Unleashed calendar to check when you’re booked next week.”

  Cold crept up Steph’s chest. She rubbed her breastbone with her free hand. “Find out what? You’re not firing me, are you?”

  Penny chuckled, but it sounded nervous. “No, nothing like that. Janine called me earlier today.”

  “Why? Don’t tell me she complained about me! That’s ridiculous, Penny. Even when she only books me for half an hour, I always stay with Moose for much longer than that, and I make sure to—”

  “Calm down. She didn’t complain. She couldn’t say enough nice things about you and how great you are with Moose.”

  Steph let her head drop against the back of the seat. “Oh. It’s nice of her to call to let you know how happy she is with our services.”

  “Um, yeah, but she didn’t really call to talk about how wonderful you are. I’m so sorry, Steph. She told me she’s moving to Chicago.”

  The words seemed to echo through the phone, but Steph’s brain refused to grasp the meaning. “She’s moving?”

  “Yes.”

  “And taking Moose with her?”

  “Yes, of course,” Penny said. “She wouldn’t leave him behind.”

  “No, of course not.” Steph rubbed her forehead. “When?”

  “Janine’s company is sending her to Chicago at the start of the new year. Apparently, it was all very short notice.”

  The start of the new year… That meant she had less than two weeks to say goodbye to her favorite canine client.

  “I’m sorry. I know how you feel. I lost one of mine last month too.” Penny hesitated. “Want to come over and help me dog-sit?”

  Aww. Steph knew what the offer had cost her friend. Penny thought it unprofessional to take anyone along while pet-sitting at a client’s house and had never before done it, as far as Steph knew. “Thanks, but I think I’ll just go home.”

  “Is Rae home?”

  “I don’t think so. She’s probably at work. December is a busy time at the club.” Besides, Rae wasn’t really one to give a pep talk or a comforting hug. “Don’t worry about me, okay? I’ll be fine.”

  When they ended the call, she dropped the phone onto her lap and leaned her head against the steering wheel. God, what a day. Too bad Rae wasn’t home and wasn’t the huggy type. She could really use a hug.

  The apartment was strangely quiet. Silence had never bothered Rae—just the opposite, she preferred it. In the beginning, she hadn’t been sure she could survive life with a roommate for very long. Constantly having someone around, especially someone who was on the talkative side, was her own personal version of hell.

  But even though she and Steph were very different, their daily routines meshed amazingly well. They worked the same late hours and most often got up and went to bed around the same time, so Rae had never been kept up by noise from Steph’s room. She also rarely had the apartment to herself, and now she found herself roaming the place like a wild animal testing out the borders of its territory.

  Just as she stopped in front of the fridge to take stock of her dinner options, a key sounded in the lock. The front door swung open, and Steph trudged in, kicking the door closed with her heel. She dropped her keys on the table as if her fingers didn’t have enough strength to hold on to them anymore. “Oh. You’re home.”

  “Yeah,” Rae said. “Since I’ll be working both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, Mr. Hicks told me to take the night off.”

  Steph nodded.

  No jokes about Rae ruining her plans for a wild party or inviting people over for an orgy because she had assumed she’d have the apartment to herself? Something strange was going on here. Rae leaned against the fridge and studied Steph. Her gray eyes looked dull, without the usual sparkle that always seemed to light them from within. Normally, Rae wasn’t one to notice that kind of thing, but now it seemed obvious to her that something had happened. Should she ask what was up?

  Steph plodded over, rooted through the cabinets, and then banged each of them shut.

  Well, at least she was closing the cupboard doors. That was progress. Kind of. Rae winced at the loud noise but said nothing.

  “Where did all the chocolate go?” Steph muttered.

 
“Your belly.”

  Steph abandoned her search and sank against the counter. “Damn.”

  Any halfway decent roommate would ask if she was okay. Rae knew that, even though she had no clue how to handle the obvious response. She forced herself to ask anyway. “You okay?”

  “Moose is moving away,” Steph blurted out as if she had waited for Rae to ask. “I mean, his owner is, so Moose is leaving too.”

  “Oh.” Rae didn’t know what to say. She had met the lovable giant only once, but even she was a little sad she wouldn’t get to see him again, so she could easily imagine how sad Steph must be feeling. “Damn. I’m sorry. That’s too bad.”

  Steph sighed. “Yeah.”

  “But at least he didn’t die or anything, right?”

  “Yeah.” Another sigh came from Steph.

  Rae shifted her weight from her left leg to the right and back. Why was there no book with easy-to-follow instructions on how to handle situations like this? Normally, she didn’t bother to even try. Cheering up people wasn’t her favorite pastime. She’d done enough of that growing up, when she’d shouldered much of the responsibility for her brother. But the sadness in Steph’s eyes pierced her emotional armor. Slowly, she made her way over to Steph and patted her shoulder once. Okay, that was awkward. She patted again, trying to make it less robotic.

  Steph leaned in to the touch, soaking it up as if it would chase away the sadness.

  That was good, right? She could do this comforting thing. Rae stopped patting and curled her fingers around Steph’s shoulder for a quick squeeze.

  But Steph took it as an invitation to sink against her side.

  Somehow, Rae found herself holding her in a loose embrace, with Steph’s head on her shoulder. Wow. Rae stood rooted to the spot as if she were holding a fragile newborn that the parents had entrusted her with. She hadn’t held anyone for months. Not since trying to be there for Kim after Mike’s death. But this felt different. For one thing, she was very aware of Steph’s breath warming a spot on her chest and her hands on her back, whereas such details had never registered when she had held Kim.