Finding Family...and Forever?

by Southwick, Teresa

  “I see.” No, she didn’t. “It’s really nice of him to think of me, but it’s probably not a good idea.”

  “For whom?” His question was direct and challenging.

  Instead of answering him immediately, she made a lateral move. “Who’s going to take care of Kyle? I can’t leave him.”

  “Alan said we should bring him. Other people are bringing their kids along.” He straightened and leaned back against the sofa. “This would be a good opportunity for you to get to know your family.”

  “You’re probably right about that,” she agreed. “But I’m not sure about telling them who I am. It doesn’t seem right to put them through all that emotional upheaval when they seem okay.”

  Part of her actually believed that. The other part figured fear was holding her back. Fear of rejection followed by having to move on with her life. Moving on might mean leaving town and she was selfish enough to want this time with Justin to go on just a little longer.

  “You need to know something, Emma.” He blew out a long breath. “It might appear that they’re okay, but I still saw the pain in Alan’s eyes. He told me they went forward for the sake of their sons. People have to move on when something bad happens.”

  “You didn’t,” she pointed out, not sure why the words tumbled out of her mouth.

  His eyes darkened, but his voice was calm when he answered. “My situation was different. I moved on emotionally before my wife died. Not wanting to make another mistake isn’t the same as living in the past.”

  Maybe not, but that distinction didn’t make much difference to the present. It was just wrong that a man so capable of great love would be alone by choice. The realization made her angry at the woman who’d done this to him.

  “I’m sorry. It’s none of my business.” Although that didn’t keep her from having an opinion.

  “Don’t worry about it.” He met her gaze and something hot slid into his before he said, “The thing is, I have another reason for wanting you there.”

  “Oh?”

  “Alan warned me that if I’m alone, his wife will do her best to fix me up with someone at the party.”

  “I see.” She couldn’t help smiling now. “So, this is all about you.”

  “Of course.”

  “You’re not worried that we might be the focus of town hearsay, grist for the gossip mill if we’re seen at a big party together?”

  “Nope? You?” Again he was issuing a challenge.

  She decided not to share the fact that because they lived under the same roof they were already rumor central with the moms at Kyle’s play group. Emma figured that was a pretty good sampling of what was being said all over Blackwater Lake.

  It was clear that for his own reasons he wanted her to go with him to this gathering. And when he’d first asked, she’d had every intention of turning him down, even though it was a very good opportunity to interact with her parents, not to mention her brothers. Oddly enough, it was the matchmaking thing her father had probably said in jest that changed her mind.

  For the record, jealousy was a powerful motivator.

  “All right, Justin. You’ve made your point. I’ll go with you to the party.”

  Chapter Ten

  The next morning, the party several weeks away was the last thing on Emma’s mind.

  After talking with Justin, she’d gone upstairs when Kyle whimpered in his sleep. He’d been up every couple of hours during the night with a stuffy nose until finally she’d sat in the chair with him in her arms. He was fitful but did get some sleep, and rest was the best thing for a cold. It was morning now, but she was still in the glider chair, moving back and forth with the baby in her arms.

  She kissed his forehead, partly to assess his body temperature, but mostly because she needed him to know she cared. “I don’t like it when you’re not feeling well, sweetheart.”

  Justin walked into the nursery as he did every morning, freshly showered and shaved. He looked like a Hollywood heartthrob, while she resembled a back-to-nature reality show contestant who’d been on the island too long. She shouldn’t care; it wasn’t part of her job to be camera ready. Since she couldn’t quite control the feeling, she acknowledged the flaw and let it go for now.

  “Hi.” She kept her voice soft and low.

  His forehead creased with worry. “What’s wrong?”

  There was no point in asking how he knew that. The humidifier was going and this wasn’t how the morning usually started.

  “I had a bad feeling when I put Kyle to bed last night.” Then she’d gone back downstairs and Justin had convinced her to attend the Crawfords’ party. Her issues seemed so small when this little guy was sick.

  “Why? What was up last night?”

  “He was a little sniffly. More tired and cranky than usual.” She lifted her shoulders in a shrug. It was hard to put that instinctive sensation into words. She knew this child so well and cared so deeply about him, she was tuned in to his needs. “Just a feeling. I didn’t want to be right, but he has a cold.”

  “Did he sleep through the night?” Justin asked.

  She shook her head. “About every hour he woke up crying. Finally, about four I just held him.”

  “Oh, Emma—” He dragged his fingers through his hair. “I didn’t hear a thing. You should have gotten me up.”

  “I would have if there was something you could have done. But there was no point in both of us being tired. And you have to work today.”

  “Does he have a fever?”

  “It’s about a hundred. I’ve been giving him fluids and checking his diaper. It’s wet, so he’s well hydrated.”

  Justin started pacing. “I think Adam should take a look at him.”

  “I’m pretty sure it’s just a virus.” She looked at the baby when he whimpered in his sleep. “Unless something changes and his temperature spikes, it might be better to treat him at home rather than expose him to more germs at the clinic.”

  “I have connections there.” He stopped in front of her and looked down, concern darkening his eyes. “He won’t have to sit in the waiting room.”

  Emma nodded. “If that’s what you want, I’ll bring him in today.”

  “I’ll call Adam. Kyle will be the first patient in and out before normal working hours start.”

  “Okay.”

  Justin used his cell to call the family practice doctor, who agreed to meet them before the clinic opened its doors. When he put the phone back on the case at his belt, she stood up and handed him the baby.

  “I’ll throw some clothes on.”

  Emma went to her room and dressed in jeans, sweater and boots. She ran a brush through her hair and sighed at the dark circles under her eyes.

  “You should see the other guy,” she said to her reflection.

  Less than five minutes later she joined Justin in the nursery where Kyle was awake and fussy. She put fresh supplies in the diaper bag and looked at the sippy cup on the table beside the glider chair.

  “I’ll refill that and get him ready to go.”

  Justin stood and gave her the baby. “Let me do the cup.”

  “Okay. Half water, half ginger ale.” She saw his disapproving look and said, “Now isn’t the time to worry about nutrition. He likes it and will drink. The most important thing is making sure he’s hydrated.”

  “You’re not a pediatrician.”

  “Neither are you.”

  “But I am a doctor.” Annoyance chased away the worry in his eyes for just a moment.

  “But your specialty isn’t babies. I’ve cared for a lot of little ones. They’re not just small adults.”

  “I know that.”

  She blew out a long breath. “Look, we can stand here and argue about what he should drink or get him to someon
e you trust to tell us.”

  He nodded curtly. “I’ll meet you downstairs.”

  “I can drive him to the clinic. Then you’ll have your car there and won’t have to bring us home.”

  “I’ll drive.” He walked out of the room before she could say anything else and that was just as well.

  She put the fussy baby on the changing table and he rubbed his nose and eyes. The frustrated whimpering broke her heart.

  “I know, sweetheart. I wish I could make you all better, but it just takes time.”

  She felt guilty for snapping at Justin. In spite of the one mistake that had landed the two of them in his bed, she and her boss got along really well. He was easygoing and a devoted father. Today he was a worried one and the tension made him short-tempered. She’d been up most of the night and was tired, which made for a volatile mix.

  About twenty minutes later she and Justin were in exam room one at the clinic and Adam Stone was taking a look at the boy. Emma had met him at Kyle’s one-year checkup and liked him very much. He was tall, dark and handsome, but on him it wasn’t a cliché. Married to Blackwater Lake girl Jill Beck, he was a stepfather to her son, and the two had a baby of their own on the way. More important, he was a nice man and easy to talk to.

  “His temp is just under a hundred,” Adam said.

  Justin was standing by the examination table trying to comfort his son, who was wearing nothing but a diaper. “He might need an antibiotic.”

  The other doctor said nothing as he cupped the rounded end of the stethoscope in his hands then placed it on Kyle’s chest and back, listening intently. “Sounds good. You said he’s not coughing?”

  “That’s right.” Emma was standing beside her boss, aching to hold the baby but reluctant to overstep. Trying to figure out where she fit in here.

  “I’ll just have a look at his throat and ears.”

  Kyle wasn’t the least bit happy at being manhandled this way and reached out to Emma, refusing to hold still. That did it. She didn’t care if she was overstepping. No way would she stand by and watch when this baby was so upset and wanted her. She reached past Justin to pull the boy into her arms and he clung to her. In moments the hiccuping sobs started to subside.

  “I’m sorry, Dr. Stone. But when he cries like that it breaks my heart. Would it be all right if I hold him while you do the examination?”

  “Absolutely,” he approved. “If he’s calmer, I can get a better look at what’s going on.”

  She cuddled the baby close and cooed to him reassuringly while the doctor listened to his back, then used a scope to check his ears. Kyle squirmed, but quieted when she whispered that everything was all right and just hold still a little longer. Dr. Stone actually managed to get a quick look in his throat, too.

  “His nose is running from crying,” he observed. “Any color to the secretions?”

  “I don’t think so.” Justin looked blank for a moment then deferred to her. “Is there?”

  “No. They’ve been clear.” She rubbed her hand soothingly up and down Kyle’s bare back as she swayed from side to side. “Is it okay if I get him dressed?”

  “Sure.” Adam had a wry expression on his face as he looked at his colleague. “You’ve got it bad, bud.”

  “What?”

  “It’s a syndrome a lot of doctors come down with when their kids get sick. The main symptom is forgetting everything you learned in med school.”

  Justin rubbed his neck. “So I’m overreacting?”

  “Yeah. When the child is yours, you run on pure emotion. Logic and training go out the window. In a couple months when Jill has the baby, you can give me a hard time when my turn comes.”

  “I’m holding you to that,” Justin promised. “So, Kyle is all right?”

  “It looks like a virus and you know as well as I do that it just has to run its course. Antibiotics won’t do anything unless he has a bacterial infection and prescribing them now runs the risk of him becoming resistant to them if he really needs one. Don’t worry. He’s going to be fine.”

  “That’s what Emma said.”

  She was sliding denim overalls on Kyle but looked over her shoulder and smiled. “I didn’t expect public acknowledgment.”

  Justin looked sheepish. “She told me it wasn’t serious and hydration was the most important thing.”

  “She’s right. Whatever you can get him to take. Clear liquids, even Popsicles.”

  “Ginger ale?” she asked sweetly.

  “That’s good.” Adam nodded thoughtfully. “You probably already know this, but a slight fever isn’t dangerous. It’s the body’s defenses kicking in to fight whatever is attacking. Keep an eye on it and use over-the-counter children’s medication if necessary. If you’re concerned about anything, call me.”

  “Thanks, Adam.” Justin looked at her. “Consider this more public acknowledgment of your expertise. You were right about the ginger ale.”

  “He’s a sturdy kid and has an excellent nanny,” the other doctor said.

  After he was dressed, Emma picked Kyle up from the exam table. “Thank you, Doctor.”

  “Anytime.” He looked at Justin. “I’d like to talk to you about a patient. Do you have a minute?”

  “Sure.” He looked at her. “Would you mind waiting for me in the break room? You were also right about keeping him away from sick people.”

  “Not a problem,” she told him.

  Adam just grinned as she walked out and closed the door. She knew the room he wanted her to wait in was down the hall by the backdoor and walked there with the baby in her arms. A woman wearing pink scrubs was pouring herself a cup of coffee. Emma remembered nurse Ginny Irwin from Kyle’s one-year checkup.

  Her salt-and-pepper-colored hair was cut in a pixie style. Blue eyes snapped with intelligence and something that looked a lot like curiosity. “Hi, Emma.”

  “It’s nice to see you again, Ginny.” She smiled at the little boy, who shyly buried his face in her neck. “And you probably remember Kyle Flint.”

  “I do.” She smiled, then stared at Emma as if she was trying to remember something. “You remind me of someone.”

  She’d heard that before; people said it all the time. But, right here, right now, it meant something different. She knew her father and mother had been in the clinic yesterday. And before that, Maggie Potter had commented about her resemblance to Michelle.

  “You know what they say—” She struggled to be casual. “Everyone has a double.”

  “Maybe.” Ginny blew on her steaming coffee. “But I’d swear I’ve seen your double recently.”

  “Maybe I just have one of those faces.” Her heart pounded and she hoped it didn’t show. Explaining wouldn’t be easy.

  “Could be.” She smiled at Kyle. “And speaking of that, he sure looks like his dad. This little boy is a cutie.”

  “That he is.” As was his father.

  “Nice to see you again. I’d love to stay and chat, but I need to get back to work.”

  “Don’t let us hold you up. Have a good day.” Emma returned the smile as the other woman left the room.

  When she was alone, she let out a long breath. If Ginny recognized that she had a look-alike when they weren’t even standing together, the resemblance to her mother must really be strong.

  She’d looked nothing like the people who raised her and had never questioned it. What if there’d been a medical emergency and the truth came out with no warning? The shock would have been horrible. Since coming to Blackwater Lake she’d made her decisions based on her wish to spare the family any upset. But what if more people noticed the resemblance when they were together? And they would be together at the party.

  She had to say something; she knew that. Now she wondered whether it would be easier to hear the news before or after the
birthday party.

  * * *

  “Thanksgiving isn’t for a couple of weeks. I could have gone grocery shopping for everything on my own,” Emma said for the tenth time. “You didn’t have to give up a day off to help.”

  Justin would have known she was in the car even if he couldn’t see or hear her. The fragrance of flowers drifted around him and he was pretty sure that even Kyle, who was safely strapped in the backseat, could smell it. The three of them were just leaving the store parking lot and Justin checked traffic on his left before turning onto Main Street.

  “Helping you buy and carry all that stuff is the least I could do to make up for being a jerk when Kyle was sick.”

  “Thank goodness he’s better now.”

  “So you were worried.” Justin made the turn, then glanced at her.

  “Of course. But my concern was handled in a sensible, I’ve-got-a-plan way.”

  He appreciated her leaving out the part where his concern had manifested in an almost complete breakdown-of-rational-thought way. Glancing in the rearview mirror, he smiled at the bright-eyed little boy looking out the window and chattering away in the backseat. Halloween had come and gone. It had been a week since Kyle had been sick, but Justin still felt bad for taking out his anxiety on Emma. What was that saying? You always hurt the ones you love....

  No, it wasn’t that. He couldn’t think of a label for this thing simmering between them, but no way he’d call it love.

  “Next time he’s under the weather, I promise to defer to your wisdom,” he vowed.

  “I’ll believe that when I see it.” Her tone was brimming with amusement.

  “How can you say that?” he protested. “I’m guilty before the fact?”

  “We hope Kyle will never be sick again, but that’s probably not realistic. As you well know, Doctor, he has to take his immune system out for a spin every now and then to exercise it. And when that happens, there’s every reason to believe you’ll do the same thing.”

  “Which was?”

  “You’ll behave like any other loving father would.”

  “But I’m a trained physician. I know better.”