Intimacy

by Mattie Bowman

  I gripped her shoulders, the only non-sexual place I could think to grab, but even then, the softness of her bare skin ignited an extreme want right through me. “You’ll regret it.”

  “No,” she said her shoulders dropping again. “But you probably will.” She took a step back, wrapping her arms around herself as if she could hold together all that was breaking. “Who wants to sleep with a twenty-one-year-old virgin. No experience. Not really. What could I ever offer anyone compared to what is handed to you boys on a silver-tube-top-platter with every show we do?” A small sigh left her lips, and with her head down, she walked toward the door.

  Something inside me screamed not to let her go, despite the logic my brain told me that she should. She cracked open the door, and I slammed it shut, my chest rising and falling as if I’d had to sprint the distance.

  I caged her in with my other arm, never losing her eyes. “You have everything to offer,” I said.

  Red flushed her cheeks, and she parted her lips, wetting them before she spoke. “Then, if only for tonight, could you pretend? Pretend that I’m worth loving.”

  I shook my head. “Don’t, for one second, think you aren’t worth everything. Because you fucking are.”

  Two rapid beats of my heart and I’d done something I’d dreamed of for years. I crushed my lips against hers, parting hers with my tongue. She gasped, her arms flying around my neck to hold me closer. I stroked her tongue, tasting every inch of her that she allowed. Sliding my hands over her hips, I hoisted her up against me and growled when she locked her ankles around my back.

  Pressing her back against the door, I revealed in the feel of her mouth on mine. Better than any of my fantasies and stronger than any want I’d ever felt. Drawing back, I rested my forehead against hers. “And I won’t have to pretend anything, Riley.”

  Her eyes popped in surprise and understanding, but I tilted her head back to get a deeper angle to kiss her—not wanting to verbally analyze this stolen moment. I may never get another, so for tonight, I would take the gift I’d been offered, and repay it threefold.

  Never breaking our kiss, I held her underneath her glorious ass and guided us to the bed. Gently laying her on her back, I slowly slipped off her boots, then her ripped fishnets, and lastly her skirt and tank top. I hissed at the sight of her creamy skin against the black lace of her bra and thong and ran my hands greedily over every inch of her. She trembled beneath my touch but arched into each caress as if she couldn’t get enough.

  The feeling was mutual.

  I kissed my way up her ankle, over her knee, and to the soft spot of her inner thigh. I teased my tongue over the lacy fabric until she writhed beneath me, clutching my back with her nails as if she was on the edge of pleasure and pain. Glancing up at her, I smirked when she moaned.

  She threw her arms over her face, hiding from me. I popped up, situating myself between her thighs, and tugged her arms down. “Look at me,” I said.

  She slowly opened her eyes. “I’m embarrassed.”

  “Not with me. You never hide anything with me. Just let me take care of you.”

  She bit down on the corner of her lip, relaxing underneath me as she pulled my shirt over my head and tossed it on the floor. I kissed her gently, sliding my tongue over hers in what seemed like the most natural embrace in the world. As if we’d done this hundreds of times. Shimmying out of my pants, I kept my briefs on and worked my way back down her body, planting kisses over every inch of skin until I’d relieved her of the slip of fabric that kept us separated.

  “Beautiful,” I said before gently sliding my tongue over her swollen pink flesh. She arched upward, gripping a fistful of my hair.

  “Oh my God,” she moaned.

  I grinned, sliding my tongue inside her while I stroked her clit with my fingers, her flavor exploding on my tongue, turning my already hard dick solid.

  Her breaths were quick and hurried as she bucked her hips against me. Greedy and desperate. The sounds she made, the movement of her glorious body, the way she tasted, it all made me harder than I’d ever been, but I took my time. Savoring each flick of my tongue, each sigh from her lips, every roll of her hips.

  Sliding in two fingers, I gave her the pressure she needed while sucking her clit into my mouth. She clenched around my fingers, bucking into her orgasm as her entire body shook. I watched her fly apart for the first time, and it was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. Nothing, would ever or could ever top Riley’s wild side, and I felt like the luckiest asshole in the world to have seen it. To have owned that piece of her.

  “Grant,” she said as I slowly worked my way up her body, settling my hard cock over her entrance. “Yes,” she begged.

  I smoothed some hair off her face, locking eyes with her. “Are you sure?” I needed the verbal confirmation. Needed to know with absolute certainty that my best friend wanted me to take her virginity, or if she’d just needed to get off and was now rethinking such a huge decision.

  She didn’t break my gaze as she reached down and wrapped her fingers around my dick, pumping the length with hooded eyes. I hissed, the feel of her against me was enough to make my spine electric, and I hadn’t even gotten inside her yet. Teasing my bottom lip with her tongue, she lifted her hips and guided me to her entrance, tucking me inside her just enough for me to feel how slick and hot she was.

  A wave of sparks crackled inside my blood, and I growled. “Riley.”

  “Yes, Grant. Please. I want this. I want you.” She nodded, and my heart felt as if it had tripled in size, making it difficult to breathe. I was no virgin, but this, with Riley, was something beyond comparison.

  This was love.

  This was real.

  Slowly, as if I thought I would shatter her, I inched myself inside. She was so tight, her walls hugging my cock in the most agonizingly perfect way. I leaned my forehead against hers when I’d filled her. “Are you all right?” I whispered against her mouth.

  A soft moan, and a hard kiss. She rolled her hips, her brow furrowing with a bite of pain. I stayed still within her, allowing her to adjust to my size, giving her free reign to move as fast and hard as she wanted.

  She took it easy at first, long, slow movements that squeezed me and sent delicious shivers across my skin. I kissed the bare skin of her collarbone, the line of her jaw, and her perfect lips as she discovered herself around me.

  After what felt like the most amount of torture I could take, she sighed and relaxed beneath me. Carefully, I shifted above her, pumping soft at first and then, when her hands gripped my ass and urged me faster, harder, I complied.

  I sunk myself inside her, over and over, and she met me with hard bucks of her own. My greedy, wild Riley. She took every ounce I had to give but returned it with a ferocity I didn’t know existed.

  “Grant, oh fuck,” she moaned as I felt her clench around my dick.

  “I’m with you.”

  “Promise?” She asked as if I could be anywhere else.

  “Promise,” I said, slipping my hand underneath her back and hefting her upward to get as deep as possible.

  She arched off the bed, her eyes fluttering as she keened. Liquid gold filled my veins, my skin flushing with sparks that had me following her orgasm with my own. I rested my head against her breasts as we caught our breath.

  Running her fingers through my hair, she relaxed beneath me.

  “I love you,” I whispered against her skin. “I always have.” I shifted, daring to look at her.

  Pain flashed behind her lusty-exhausted eyes, but she smiled softly. She couldn’t say the words back, and though I knew she hadn’t ever looked at me in that light before tonight, the ache in my chest threatened to rob me of the bliss we’d just experienced.

  “What happens now?” I asked, resettling my head on her chest.

  “We sleep,” she said, her voice soft. “And tomorrow, we’ll figure things out.”

  “Together?” I hated how desperate I sounded, but I’d never allowed myself
to entertain a world where Riley was mine. Now that I’d claimed her, I didn’t fucking want to let her go.

  “Together.” The word was enough to soothe the earlier sting, and I breathed. I fell asleep, our bodies tangled.

  “Riley?” I said the second I realized I was alone in the bed. The sheets felt cold when I stretched my arms, and after a quick walk around the suite, I knew she’d gone. Where? I didn’t have a clue but hoped like hell it was just to get a change of clothes and come back to me.

  After an hour, a sourness had settled in my gut. I wondered if this is what it felt like after all the one-night-stands I’d had on tour in the earlier days, but at least then the girls knew exactly what they signed up for. I never hid the fact that I was a one and done man, and they’d respected that—mostly since they only wanted my body for a story, to say they’d slept with the lead singer of Wolfsbane. My heart had always belonged to someone else, and last night, I’d finally gotten a taste.

  Finally, I slipped into a pair of dark jeans and my favorite black T, securing my long hair back with a tie. Maybe Steve, our manager, had spotted her and held her up over something to do with the tour. I kept telling myself an array of excuses as I slowly made my way to her suite, my stomach twisting the closer I got.

  Something was wrong. I knew it from the way my arm felt like dead weight as I lifted it to wrap my knuckles against her door.

  “I got it, babe!” Bently’s voice sounded on the other side of the door, and acid churned so fast in my gut it was a wonder I didn’t puke on the bastard when he opened the door. “Hey, Grant. What’s shaking?”

  I locked my jaw, unable to open my mouth. My fists clenched as I searched the area behind him, desperate to set eyes on her. Surely she wasn’t in there? This had to be some kind of mistake.

  “Bro?” He said, cocking an eyebrow at me, and I quickly pinched the bridge of my nose. “You look like shit.”

  “I, yeah…” I couldn’t fucking form a sentence.

  “Grant,” Riley’s voice came from behind Bently, and he shuffled until she was in the doorway, too. She wore the same clothes she had on last night. The same exact clothes I’d peeled off of her before branding myself on her in every possible way. Hell, I was probably still tickling inside her.

  Her eyes were redder, and conflicted, if that was possible.

  I blinked several times, unable to not see the diamond on her left-hand ring finger.

  Bently noticed my shock, but hopefully not the dagger that shot straight into my heart at the sight.

  “Yeah, Bro. I finally popped the question.” He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulled her against him despite her looking like she was going to puke from the awkwardness. At least we were on the same page in that regard.

  I cleared my throat, swallowing past the massive rock that blocked my airways. “Congratulations,” I choked out.

  “Thanks, man. Did it this morning. Fucking woman,” he glanced down at her adoringly. “She slept in one of Steve’s spare rooms instead of coming back to me last night. Scared the shit out of me. Enough for me to get my shit together, anyway,” he explained, but I was already backing away.

  “Nice,” I called over my shoulder. “Coffee,” I grumbled as an excuse for my rapid departure. I made it inside the empty elevator before Riley sprinted to stop the doors from closing.

  I narrowed my eyes at her, unable to look at her without my soul ripping to fucking shreds.

  “Grant,” she said my name the same way she had earlier, almost apologetically.

  I eyed the ring. “Guess a diamond is worth me waking up alone.” I swallowed back the hot tears building in my throat. Get a grip, dude.

  “He apologized this morning and sprung this on me. I didn’t know what to do.”

  I huffed, rolling my eyes.

  “It’s not like I could say no!” She whisper-hissed. “Why would I have the reason to do that? He would be suspicious.”

  I took two steps toward her until I was looking down on her from all the height I had. “You could say no because he’s a cheating prick who doesn’t have a clue who you really are. I’d say that is grounds enough without suspicion.”

  Her green eyes glistened. “I panicked. Last night was amazing but come on, we both know you aren’t a relationship man.”

  I gaped at her. “Did you not hear a fucking word I said last night?”

  “I did.” She swallowed hard. “I just need a second to think, Grant.”

  I shook my head, rubbing my palms over my face. “If the answer isn’t clear in your mind already, don’t fucking bother.”

  I gently touched her hip, and a tortured part of me relished the way her eyes closed in submission when I did. Then I nudged her backward—instead of jerking her against me like every cell in my body demanded. She sucked in a sharp breath as she stood in the hallway, the elevators slowly closing.

  “Grant,” she whispered before they shut completely.

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  About the Author

  Mattie Bowman has spent most of her life enduring the wild, socially awkward, and hilarious situations that appear in her books. She has a soft spot for anyone who has ever been mortified and finds something incredibly beautiful in the mistakes that make us more human. When not putting her characters through cheek-reddening situations (both funny and steamy) she’s spending time with her husband and two kids…plus one fur-baby!