Fourth Down: A Beaumont Series Next Generation Spin-off
Page 18
Noise from the outside has me looking through my rear-view mirror. There’s a group of women, four or five of them, heading toward the elevator. They help make up my mind on what I’m doing and that’s staying in the car, at least for the time being. I lean my head back and close my eyes. Only to have my conversation with Elena replay in my mind. My life is a freaking nightmare, except when it comes to Autumn. I don’t know what it is about her, but she definitely knows how to bring a smile to my face. As I sit here, I wonder if I would’ve looked twice at her if things weren’t sour between Elena and me? I don’t want to think any woman could pull me away from my wife because I’ve never looked sideways at another woman since I met Elena. But something in my gut tells me Autumn would’ve been the one to get me to look. I hate that feeling. I’m not the sort of man who does those things to his family. Maybe this is part of the reason why I couldn’t stand being around Autumn when I first met her.
“And now you can’t stand to be away from her,” I say to my reflection.
I get out of the SUV, make my way to the elevator and take it to the lobby, where I exit and walk toward Noah’s place. Autumn will be there, and I want to see her. I’m past the point of caring whether people think I’m doing something wrong because I’m not divorced yet. Elena doesn’t seem to care, so why should I?
My thoughts cause me to stop. People behind me bump into me, muttering obscenities because they’re in a rush to get somewhere, and I’ve made them detour. That’s probably the first lesson I learned when I moved here; if you need to stop, move over to the side so people can continue with their journey.
“What am I doing?” I ask aloud.
“Blocking the sidewalk,” someone says as they pass by.
I ignore them and look in the direction of Noah’s building and then back to mine. I feel like I’m at a fork in the road. If I go right, my future could be waiting for me there, and if I go left—well, all I see is darkness. Why can’t I see the other path? Why do I only see darkness? Most importantly, why am I overthinking everything?
“Fuck it.” I continue toward Noah’s. I deserve to be happy, and if it’s Autumn or someone else down the road who will make me happy, then so be it. I can’t live in the past or let Elena’s decisions to break up our family mess with my life any longer.
The doorman holds the door for me. I check-in at the front desk, thankful Noah has me on his approved guest list. I’m given a passcode for the elevator and sent on my way. I think about texting Autumn to let her know I’m almost there but decide I want to see her face when I walk in.
I knock once and then open the door to Noah and Peyton’s apartment. The scene is somewhat lively. A few of my teammates are here, and Noah’s parents and little sister. I scan the room for Autumn and find her on the balcony with Quinn, Noah’s best friend. I wait for a spark of jealously to hit me, but it doesn’t. When Elena and I would come to one of Noah’s get-togethers, Elena would attach herself to Liam, Harrison, and Quinn. Even Elle if she came. I should’ve seen the writing on the wall then. After I grab a drink, I head out there to say hi.
“Hey, man, good game.” Quinn and I shake hands and hug, and then I place my hand on Autumn’s hip and lean in to kiss her cheek. “Hi,” I whisper. I feel her cheek rise and assume she’s smiling.
“No gigs this weekend?” I ask after greeting Autumn.
He shakes his head. “Nah. Soon though. We just finished recording an album. The producers need to do their thing, and then it’ll be released.”
“How’s Nola?”
“She’s good. She’s working and planning a wedding.”
“Yours?” I ask, laughing.
Quinn laughs as well and nods.
“Congratulations,” Autumn says. “Do you have a date?”
“Not yet. We gotta figure out the tour dates. We’ll get married in South Carolina. Her mother wants a spring wedding. Nola wants a fall one. I’m trying not to get in the way of planning.”
“You don’t want to have a say?” Autumn asks.
“It’s not that,” Quinn says. “Nola and I are on the same page; we agree on what we want. It’s the timing. She wants to graduate from college, and I respect that. And we also have to make sure I’m not on tour because I want to take her on a honeymoon. I don’t want her to feel like my career is in the way of having a traditional wedding. The spring to fall thing is a weather thing. We don’t want to do it when it’s too hot or during storm season.”
“Autumn knows all about the weather,” I say as I elbow her gently. She smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. I don’t know what I said wrong, but clearly something. The three of us continue to talk until Autumn steps away to answer her phone, and Quinn excuses himself, leaving me feeling a bit awkward. I try not to watch Autumn as she looks at her phone, but I can’t take my eyes off of her. She seems upset or maybe even sad. Autumn pockets her phone and continues to stare out into the darkness. I wait a long moment before walking over to her.
“Everything okay?” I ask.
She startles and looks at me. “Yes, things are good.” Autumn rises onto her toes and kisses me quickly, and then she shies away. “Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have done that.”
“Why?”
Autumn looks toward the sliding glass door and then back at me. “I don’t know,” she says as she shrugs. “I feel like you wouldn’t want your teammates seeing us like that.”
She’s right, but probably not for the reasons she’s thinking. My teammates are a bunch of adolescent men who like to tease and say stupid shit. “Don’t worry about them.” I pull her long braid forward just so I can touch her hair. “Roxy wants to grow her hair long so she can do this to her hair.”
“I can do it now to her hair. It’s very easy.”
“She’d like that.”
“Do you want to get out here?” she asks. “Go to my place for a bit?”
Twenty-Five
Autumn
Julius and I walk back to our complex. I have my arm wrapped around his, and my head rests on his shoulder whenever we have to stop at the crosswalk. It’s then that he kisses my forehead or rests his head on top of mine. These moments are sweet and tender but a prelude to what’s coming or at least what I hope will happen when we get back to my place. I’m past ready to take the next step with Julius. I don’t mind the kissing part of our relationship. In fact, I love it. But I want to feel his strong hands on my body, tugging and pulling at my heated flesh. When he pulled me onto his lap earlier, I thought I was going to lose my mind. I was ready to become the locker room cliché.
When we arrive at our apartment building, I let go of him. Everyone inside knows who he is, and I don’t want rumors to start. Only, Julius isn’t having any of it and pulls me to his side and places his arm around my shoulder. I like this show of affection, out in public, where people are watching. It’s odd because I’ve never been the type to flaunt anything, mostly due to my job, but right now, I want his arm around me. I want people to know he’s getting into the elevator with me. I want them to assume. I want people to see how lucky I am because I do feel blessed.
Inside the elevator, Julius presses the button for my floor. As much as I’d love to go to his place, I suspect that his children are home, and I don’t want him to feel awkward. I know I want more privacy than what his place can offer right now. The bell chimes, signaling we’ve arrived on the fifth floor. My heartbeat picks up the pace and starts thumping harder. Julius takes my hand in his and steps out of the elevator. I fall in step behind him as he walks us toward my place. When he reaches my door, for a moment, I wish he had a key and could let us in. Instead, I have to let go of his hand to pull my key out of my pocket. I step in front of Julius and start to slide the key into the lock. His hands are on my hips. He’s so close I can feel his breath on my neck.
“I’ve never seen a woman carry only one key on her keyring,” he quietly says as one hand glides from my hip to my stomach and the other rests on the waistband of my jeans.
Julius decides for us and pushes my door open. He guides us into the room and shuts the door once we’re clear. It’s dark in here, with only the lights from the riverwalk illuminating some of the space. I find it peaceful and can only imagine what the view from Julius’s apartment looks like from the top floor. My view must pale in comparison to his.
“Would you like something to drink?” I ask as I step away. I unzip my jacket and take it off. For some reason, I’m afraid to look at him. Fearful he might see how desperately I want to be with him.
“No,” he says, breaking the silence in the room. “The only thing I want is you, Autumn.” He turns me toward him, and a small gasp escapes as Julius’s hand cups my cheek. He looks into my eyes and then rests his forehead against mine. I think we’re both nervous and excited right now. Our breathing increases. Our chests are rising and falling together. My hand trails up his arm until I get to his neck, and then my fingers are in his hair, pulling him closer to me.
Finally, our lips touch, and it’s like the first time all over again. Julius’s arm wraps around my waist, hugging me to his chest. My breath catches in anticipation of what is to come. My mouth opens slightly, beckoning him. Julius’s tongue touches mine, and it’s like we are back in the locker room. My hand goes to his shirt and tugs the hem. Julius steps back, and the loss I feel from not touching him is heartbreaking. Even though he’s standing in front of me, looking at me with his lustful eyes, I want to touch him. He watches me watch him, as he pulls the collar of his shirt. In one fell swoop, his bare chest is before me, and all I can do is swallow. My fingers itch to trace the lines of his pecs. My tongue darts out, wetting my lips when I see his happy trail. The waistband of his briefs shows slightly above his jeans, and it’s like a prelude to what’s hidden behind the denim he’s wearing.
I step forward with thoughts of kissing every inch of his chest, but then decide if he’s taking off his shirt, I might as well remove mine. My arms cross in front of my chest, and I grip the ends of my top, pulling until it’s off and laying on the floor. I keep staring at it while I work the clasp of my bra, only to have Julius stop me.
“You’re unwrapping my gift without me,” he says as his fingers undo the back of my bra.
His words make my knees weak. He sees me as a gift. I glance at him and start to pull my arms away. He stares intently and tosses my bra onto the growing pile of our mingled clothing. Without another thought, we’re kissing, and his hands are on my body, cupping my breasts. I push into him, needing the friction of our bodies touching.
Before I can register what is happening, he’s popped the button on my jeans and has them around my ankles. I help kick them off and relish in the way his mouth feels as he kisses and nips at my skin. I giggle as he picks me up, which makes him smile. I wrap my legs around his waist, and he carries me to the couch. I fully expect him to lay me down, but he doesn’t. He sits and leans back. It’s like he knows what I want. His fingers dig into my flesh, guiding me closer to where the bulge of his pants is. Julius sits up, cups my breast, and sets his mouth over my nipple. My head falls back, and in an instant, I’m grinding against him, moaning like a woman who hasn’t been touched in years.
His mouth is magical. And so are his fingers. He sucks and licks while his fingers twist and pull. Each action from him causes me to buck wildly against him. I haven’t had this much desire build within me in years. The need for him to be inside of me is urgent, but he doesn’t seem to want to move any faster. So I decide to take matters into my own hands. I reach between our bodies and start working the button on his jeans. As soon as the zipper is free, the bulge turns into a full-blown erection. I have no choice but to lean into him, to give me the angle I need to touch him. My hand slides into his boxers, and he smiles against my skin.
“So eager,” he says.
“So horny,” I retort. “I’ve wanted you from the first time I saw you.”
“Me too.” Julius does everything he can to get his jeans off without me having to take my hand away from his shaft. I stroke, he fumbles, and then makes up for it by rubbing me between my legs.
“Oh . . .” I start to moan, but he stops what he’s doing. I look at him, wondering what happened.
He shakes his head slightly. “I want to feel you,” he tells me. I think I understand what he’s saying but am somewhat confused. Do I move? Do I stay? My hand is still pumping his shaft, and while I think I should stop, I don’t.
Julius reaches for his jeans, and the movement is awkward. I’m still on his lap, with his erect cock in my hand. I start to move away.
“Don’t move.”
“Okay.” It’s then that I realize he’s getting a condom. Julius is back in his earlier position, looking at me. I move my hand, and he slides the rubber over his erection. I stand and shimmy out of my panties, waiting for him.
He beckons me to come toward him. “I want to watch you,” he tells me as he helps guide me onto his lap. I grip him, not afraid to show him that I can take control. I don’t care if he’s some big-time football player. I know how to satisfy myself.
And that’s precisely what I do.
* * *
Julius and I lay on our sides. Our legs are intertwined, and his arms are wrapped around me. Visions of what took place on my couch replay in my mind. The firm grip he had on my hips, moving me up and down on his erection. His eyes closing, and the way he moaned and called out my name. Julius, angling his body just right to help give me the relief my body craved. The way he took control and flipped me onto my back and pounded into me because he could no longer wait to make me his. Us, looking deep into each other’s eyes while our bodies did what comes naturally.
I think that is what I’ll remember most about this moment. The two of us, lying on our sides, with my leg hitched over his hip. We were effortless, fitting together like our bodies had been designed for each other. Julius moved slowly, never taking his eyes off mine. He read me, knew exactly what I needed, and delivered. I have never had a more intense orgasm than I did with him in that moment.
“What are you thinking about?” he asks.
“Nothing and everything,” I tell him.
“Same. I can’t believe this happened.”
“What do you mean?”
He adjusts and pulls me a little closer. He’s starting to harden again, and my lady bits begin to cheer. “We started off so rocky. I never would’ve imagined us being like this. You’re so beautiful and smart, and I treated you so poorly.”
“I like to find the good in people,” I tell him. “I wanted to hate you, but I couldn’t. The universe put us in each other’s path for a reason.”
He flexes his hips toward mine. “Is this the reason?” he asks, and I laugh.
“I don’t know about that. But I do enjoy that particular reason.”
“Can I ask you a weird question?”
I nod.
He thinks for a moment and then finally asks. “Are you adventurous when it comes to sex?”
“Why do you want to tie me up?”
Julius smiles. “Not necessarily, but I’d like to know the rules, so to speak.”
I look at him questioningly.
“Like, if you’re in the kitchen, are you game for a quickie? Do you like sex in the shower? In the car? Or are you a ‘we have to plan to have sex’ type person?”
“No, I don’t think we have to plan. If
the mood is right, it’s right. As far as the car—I haven’t done that since high school.”
His eyes go wide, and then he grins widely. “Naughty, Weather Girl.”
“You know, I used to hate it when you called me that. I thought it was disparaging and rude, but now when you say it . . . well,” I move closer, put my leg over his hip, grab his growing erection and rub it against me. “I really, really like it.”
Twenty-Six
Julius
It’s Tuesday, and I’m sitting in this tiny waiting room while waiting for my first therapy appointment. My phone rests in my hand, and the screen shows messages from Autumn, Elena, and a slew of other people. The only people I’ve spoken to in the last twenty-four hours have been my parents, my children, and a few of my teammates. I don’t know what I’m doing or what’s going on in my head, except I’m beyond confused about life right now.
The door opens, and a woman, no taller than five feet, smiles warmly at me and asks me to follow her. I stand, unfolding myself from the crouched position I put myself in, and follow her. If she’s intimidated by my size, she doesn’t show it. The door shuts behind me with a loud click that causes me to jump. In reality, it probably isn’t as bad as my mind is making it out to be.
“Have a seat,” she says, pointing to the blue sofa resting against the wall. I do as instructed and immediately look out the large window. The view isn’t much. We are three stories up and surrounded by old buildings that have been converted into office space.
“I’m Dr. Eileen O’Donnell. It’s nice to meet you, Julius. You can call me Eileen.”
“You as well,” I say. “Thank you for seeing me on short notice.” This morning, I woke up and went right to a lawyer my agent knows to take care of the paperwork needed to file for divorce. My agent’s office had done most of the work but needed someone local to look things over. According to my agent and this lawyer, Scott, everything seems cut and dry, as I expected. I signed the papers, and they assured me Elena would be served by the end of the day. I should’ve felt relief, but a sense of longing, sadness, and anger washed over me. How did my life and marriage come to this? A five-sheet packet of paper detailing our prenup agreement, her transgression, and the terms of what I want for custody.