A Different Shade of Blue, Shades of Blue, Book 2
Page 15
"What?"
"Don't. Touch. Pies." She growled and hurried from the room.
"I thought one was for us," he called after her.
On the second floor, Nora walked down the hallway. Her mother's door was open and she glanced in. Carolyn Banks sat at her dressing table. She held something in her hands and stared blankly out the window. "Mama?"
"Oh, hello, dear," her mother turned toward the door and Nora was relieved to see her face was tear free. "I was just thinking about you."
Puzzled Nora entered and moved closer. "About me?"
"Why yes, I've decided that perhaps we should go to Virginia. Visit my sister there and present you to polite society. You're not going to find a suitable husband here and it's time I think of others besides me. Once you get settled, then Mitch can do the same here. Or come with us if he pleases. We can sell the mercantile. Your father provided well for us."
"What about you? Where do you plan to live?"
Carolyn Banks held out a letter she held. "Your aunt Martha has invited me to come, to move to Virginia. She is widowed as well and I'm considering it." Her eyes twinkled at her. "Oh to live in the city again. You have no idea how dreadful it's been living so far from all the comforts."
Nora sat on the trunk at the foot of her parent's bed. "I had no idea you felt that way mother."
Carolyn sighed and offered a soft smile. "I did it for your father. It was his dream to come here. To start a business of his own, just like his father did in Virginia. He was quite the dreamer, your father."
A dreamer? Nora had a hard time picturing the young Arthur Banks and even less success a young dreamer. Her father's only goal in life seemed to be doting on her mother, always at her beck and call. Never acted as if it bothered him.
"Father was a good man."
"Yes, he was," her mother agreed. "And I took him for granted." She sniffed Nora's eyes widened, not so much at her tears, but at the statement. "All he did was try to make me happy to ensure I didn't complain about living out here."
"He loved you, Mama, I don't think he minded."
A soft smile curved her mother's lips. "Every once in a while, he'd get annoyed with me. In his own quiet way Arthur would let me know his displeasure at whatever it was I asked of him." Carolyn shook her head at a memory. "After he'd fetched me coffee once, he placed the cup down and walked away. I went to drink from it and it was empty." She chuckled. "When I asked him why he brought me an empty cup, he said, "I asked you for an apple pie for dessert for supper and that's what I got."
Nora laughed. "That does sound like something he'd do." She reached and patted her mother's hand. "When are you planning this trip east?"
"It depends on what Mitch wants to do," her mother replied. "If he's keeping the house and the mercantile, then I'll leave more things behind and it will be sooner." She looked about the room accessing. "Although we probably will have to sell most everything."
Grayson would be there any minute and this turn of events had Nora wondering what to say. "I'm going to supper at the Cole's tonight. You do remember?"
"Ah yes. Goodness, Nora, it's best you break things off and the sooner the better. Out east no one will know of all this unfortunate mess between the two of you. Grayson Cole is not the marrying kind, mark my word."
Not one to allow others to think for her, Nora met her mother's eyes. "I will decide my future, Mother. Whether or not I move east, and what happens between Grayson and me. I don't foresee marrying him, because he may not be inclined to marry, but it's a decision that he and I must make together."
Once again her mother surprised her and lifted her eyebrows in approval. "Very well, but I will not leave you behind unless you are married and both you and I know that's hardly possible if you've got your heart set on that Cole boy. So think on it and make up your mind soon."
The ride out to Cole ranch started in awkward silence, Grayson replied to her questions with clipped one or two word answers until she gave up attempting to hold a conversation. He slowed the horses when they reached the outskirts of the Cole lands and she took the opportunity to speak again.
"Can we stop for a minute, I need to talk to you."
Grayson's eyes slid from her toward his house and he swallowed visibly. "I suppose we can."
Nora glared at him. "Why do I get the feeling that you'd rather be anywhere but here with me right now?"
His brows came together and he pressed his lips into a tight line before letting out a breath. "I have a lot on my mind, it's that..." He scratched at his jaw, the stubble on his cheek making a soft rasp. "Damn it, Nora, just give me a minute."
"I haven't done anything, I'm just sitting here," Nora said and crossed her arms. "Take me home," she snapped.
With fluid movements at odds with his large size, Grayson climbed down from the wagon and rounded it. He held his hand up to her. "Come, please."
She frowned at his outstretched hand before taking it. This was it, he would tell her how sorry he was for leading her on and that he needed her to understand he wasn't going to settle down. Of course he'd attempt to sooth her feelings with promises of lingering thoughts of her. Soft promises that would not mean much.
Nora walked alongside him, her hand in his. As much as she wanted to snatch it away, at the same time touching him one last time felt good. His large hand enveloping hers gave her strength. No matter what he said, she'd accept it with grace and as much dignity as she could muster.
Blue Astor covered the field where they came to a stop, she admired the waves of the varying shades of blue, a stark reminder of how Grayson's eyes color changed according to his moods. When he turned to her, they were bright, brighter than she'd ever seen them. "Lots of flowers here, aren't there?' His question was easy enough to answer.
"It's Blue Astor. I don't think I've ever seen a more beautiful display." Nora released his hand and took a couple steps forward, the entire time looking over the field. Her eyes lighted on several grave markers, the sturdy crosses lording over the field of blue. "Is this your family's cemetery?"
Grayson nodded with his gaze on her. "Yes, my grandmother is over there." He pointed to a marker on the far left of a set of the four. "Next to her, my grandpa Hank."
The breeze picked up and the display of blue shifted easily. For some reason tears sprung and Nora looked away from Grayson. "Sophia is here too?"
"Yes," his quiet reply held huskiness to it. "She is the last marker on the right, next to my brother Joseph."
"I didn't know you had another brother." Nora scanned the markers, but they were too far in the distance to read clearly.
"He died an infant, he'd be younger than Bronson and me."
"Is this why you hesitated to stop when I asked you?" Nora asked noting he'd moved closer and now stood at her side, his hand moved to the small of her back.
"No. Not at all. If anything it's a good place for us to talk. I find it peaceful here."
This was it. Nora swallowed. "Look Grayson, I know you are attempting to find a way to take back what you said at my mother's house. I understand little about passion, but enough to know that at those times things are said that feel right at that moment."
"Is that what you think?" The confused expression made her want to slap him. The infuriating man was ruining her attempt to let him off easy.
"Of course," she replied. "What else would you have to say to me?"
He took her by the shoulders and turned her to face him. "I have plenty to say to you, Nora. I want you to know that you scare me. You've made me lose interest in other women. I even drank because of you, something I'm not good at. I'm constantly torn between getting away from you and wanting to be with you."
"I'm not sure I'm flattered by all that." Nora frowned up at him only to have his mouth over hers stopping whatever she was going to say.
The gentle kiss took her breath and she leaned into him allowing his arms to circle her in a warm embrace. Sophia's grave. Nora pushed away from Grayson, her eyes wide.
"It--it doesn't feel right to be kissing here, in front of your wife." She didn't dare to look toward the grave.
Grayson's lips curved and he looked down at his feet. "I told her about you."
"You did?"
"Yep, that same day, the one you claim I was over-passioned." He smiled widely at her. "I was confused and scared."
"Of what?" She neared and his arms automatically went around her.
"Of the pain that comes from choosing between losing someone you love and allowing them to get so close you can't imagine life without them."
Nora trembled.
"Nora." Grayson's arms slipped from around her and kneeled. He took his hat off allowing it to fall to the ground and looked up at her taking her hands. "I am in love with you, I know I haven't made it easy for you to trust me, but at this moment I promise you that I'm only yours for the rest of my life, if you will have me."
For the first time she knew what this bright shade of blue in his eyes meant. It was love and Nora's heart pounded so hard, she wasn't sure it wasn't an affliction. Her breathing hitched as she looked down at the man of her dreams.
"Marry me, Nora."
"Oh god yes!" She pulled him up to stand and threw herself against the expanse of his chest. "Yes! Yes! Yes!"
"I take that as a yes." Grayson's laughter rang across the field and the Blue Astors seemed to agree waving gaily in return.
Nora's sharp intake of breath made Grayson's expression harden. "What is it?"
"There's something you need to know about me."
"All right, but I'm not going to let you out of marrying me. Come, let's sit." He guided her to a fallen tree.
The happiness of the moment left her and she knew that once she divulged her secret, Grayson would bow out of the proposal. Why had she said yes? Why had she allowed herself to even for a moment think she could have a life with him?
Her hands trembled and Grayson reached for them. She stepped back, her eyes rounded and hand over her mouth. Tears threatened at the knowledge she was about to lose the only man she ever loved.
"I can't marry you, Grayson." He started to speak and she lifted her hand to stop him. "Listen to me. It is you who will not want to marry me once I tell you this. You won't want to be with someone like me."
"Talk to me." His eyes bore into hers.
Nora swallowed down the bile that rose into her throat. "You know you were not my first....er..."
"Lover?" he supplied.
"You are my first lover, but not my first experience." Nora forged ahead before losing her nerve. "The first time was with the man, the stranger I shot."
"So you knew him then?" His expression was guarded, not telling her what he thought.
"Yes, in a way I did. He took my virginity. It was not consensual."
What resembled a groan came from Grayson. "What happened?"
He took a step back the wall lifting between them already. Even if she wanted to stop now, she couldn't. He had a right to know.
"I was fifteen, Mitch sixteen, we were returning from a hayride and stopped when we saw him on the side of the road. He acted as if he needed help. He knocked Mitch unconscious and dragged me into the woods, to that shack. Once inside, he… he took me. Hit me when I tried to get away and threatened to kill Mitch if I didn't do what he said. It was several hours before he let me go and find my barely conscious brother."
"If I would have known, I would have killed him myself. " A muscle on Grayson's jawline jerked. "I'm sorry that happened to you, Nora."
He moved closer, but didn't touch her. Not wanting to see the distaste or pity in her eyes she kept hers trained on the ground between them. "I know most men won't want to marry someone who’s been raped."
"How can you be so strong?" His voice was hoarse, hesitant, as if he didn't quite know how to accept what she said.
"I've let it go slowly, I had to in order to move on. It happened and I have dealt with it. I needed you to know. And if you can't accept it, I understand."
"I admire you and what you've just shared does nothing to change that. It also has no bearing on how much I love you." Grayson kissed her again. She ran her fingers into his hair not wanting to let him go.
Time stopped as she became lost in his kisses, finally Grayson pressed his forehead to hers. "We should go."
"Oh God, Grayson, we're going to be late for supper." Nora set to adjusting her dress and then straightening her hair. "Oh no, look what you did." She pulled pins from her now lopsided bun and the golden brown waves fell to her waist.
Instead of looking apologetic, he seemed more proud, with a crooked grin on his face. "I can't wait to see you like that every night." Grayson winked and moved toward her.
Nora attempted to glare at him. "Stop right there, Grayson Cole." She held her arms out, her palms facing him. "Don't come near me, right now."
"You hope you won't be saying that after we're married."
Her lips curved. "Never."
Epilogue
Nora sniffed against Grayson's chest as the train pulled away from the station. The sounds of its whistle still a new sound in the region. Her mother left for Virginia alone, satisfied that Nora now happily married did not need her and Mitch deciding he'd remain.
"We can visit her once the house is built," Grayson soothed, rubbing her back. "Besides, I'm sure once we have babies, she'll come often."
"Babies?" The word took Nora's mind from her angst.
"Of course," Grayson replied, "with all the practicing we've been doing, it won't be long."
Nora gasped and searched the people nearby to ensure no one overhead. "Hush now, Grayson, goodness you can't talk like that in public."
He ignored her and gave her a wide smile. "Come along, Missus Cole, we've got to get back to town. You're going to help Mitch at the store and I better get back over to the land and see how the team is doing with the construction. Just a couple more weeks and we'll move in, then Mitch can have your parent's house."
She snuggled into his side. "He doesn't mind living above the mercantile, but you're right, as soon as he gets settled in the house, it will be time for him to set his mind on finding a suitable wife."
"I have a feeling you plan to help with that." Grayson took her elbow and steered her from the platform.
"I do," she admitted. "Mitch deserves a wife and family, he's spent his entire life looking after me, but now that I have a new handsome protector, he is free." Her eyes twinkled up at him.
"I love you, Nora."
"I know you do, Grayson, there isn't one single doubt in my mind."
The couple kissed not caring who passed by.
The End
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Hildie McQueen is my pseudonym. Writing is my dream come true. There is nothing I love more than bringing my characters and stories to life and sharing them with you. I live in a small town in Georgia with my husband and two unruly Chihuahuas.
Make sure to look me up online:
http://twitter.com/HildieMcQueen
http://facebook.com/HildieMcQueen
http://www.hildiemcqueen.com
If you enjoyed A Different Shade of Blue please recommend it to you friends and family. Remember, reviews are like candy to authors. We love it.
I answer all emails: Hildie@HildieMcQueen.com