The Bulldog Drummond Megapack

by H. C. McNeile

“Nor I,” said Jerningham.

  For a moment or two no one spoke; then Ginger Martin made a wild dive for the door. But the door which had opened so easily a few moments before now refused to budge, though he tugged at it, cursing horribly. And after a while he gave it up, and turned on Drummond like a wild beast.

  “You’ve trapped me, yer—swine. I’ll get even with you over this if I swing for it!”

  But Drummond, to whom the presence of actual danger was as meat and drink, took not the slightest notice. His brain, ice-cold and clear, was moving rapidly. It had not been a mistake, he had heard voices—voices which came from that very room in which they now were. Men had been there—men who had got out by some other way. And Ginger Martin was trapped—all of them. More out of thoughtlessness than anything else, he brushed the swearing crook aside with the back of his hand—much as one brushes away a troublesome fly. And Martin, feeling as if he’d been kicked in the mouth by a horse, ceased to swear.…

  It was uncanny—devilish. The room was empty, save for them, suddenly flooded with light. But by whom? Drummond felt they were being watched. But by whom? And then suddenly he heard Ted Jerningham’s voice, low and tense.

  “There’s a man watching us, Hugh. I can see his eyes. In that big safe door.”

  Like a flash, Drummond swung round, and looked at the safe. Ted was right; he could see the eyes himself, and they were fixed on him with an expression of malignant fury through a kind of opening that looked like the slit in a letter box. For a moment or two they remained there, staring at him, then they disappeared, and the opening through which he had seen them disappeared also, and seemed to become part of the door. And it was just as he was moving towards this mysterious safe to examine it closer that with a sudden clang, another opening appeared—one much larger than the first. He stopped involuntarily as something was thrown through into the room—something which hissed and spluttered.

  For a moment he gazed at it uncomprehendingly as it lay on the floor; then he gave a sudden, tense order.

  “On your faces—for your lives!” His voice cut through the room like a knife. “Behind the desk, you fools! It’s a bomb!”

  CHAPTER VIII

  In Which the Bag of Nuts Is Found by Accident

  It was the desk that saved Drummond, and with him Ted Jerningham. Flat on their faces, their arms covering their heads, they lay on the floor waiting, as in days gone by they had waited for the bursting of a too-near crump. They heard Ginger Martin, as he blundered round the room, and then—suddenly it came.

  There was a deafening roar, and a sheet of flame which seemed to fill the room. Great lumps of the ceiling rained down and the big roll-top desk, cracked in pieces and splintered into matchwood, fell over on top of them. But it had done its work: it had borne the full force of the explosion in their direction. As a desk its day was past; it had become a series of holes roughly held together by fragments of wood.

  So much Drummond could see by the aid of his torch. With the explosion all the lights had gone out, and for a while he lay pressed against Ted Jerningham trying to recover his wits. His head was singing like a bursting kettle: his back felt as if it was broken where a vast lump of ceiling had hit him. But after moving his legs cautiously and then his arms, he decided that he was still alive. And having arrived at that momentous conclusion the necessity for prompt action became evident. A bomb bursting in London is not exactly a private affair.

  “Are you all right, Ted?” he muttered hoarsely, his mouth full of plaster and dust.

  “I think so, old man,” answered Jerningham, and Drummond heaved a sigh of relief. “I got a whack on the back of the head from something.”

  Drummond scrambled to his feet, and switched on his torch. The wreckage was complete, but it was for the third member of the party that he was looking. And after a moment or two he found him, and cursed with a vigorous fury that boded ill for the person who had thrown the bomb, if he ever met him.

  For Ginger Martin, being either too frightened or too ignorant, had not done as he was told. There had been no desk between him and the bomb when it burst, and what was left of him adorned a corner. There was nothing to be done: the unfortunate crook would never again burgle a safe. And the only comfort to Drummond was that death must have been absolutely instantaneous.

  “Poor devil,” he muttered. “Someone is going to pay for this.”

  And then he felt Ted Jerningham clutching his arm.

  “It’s blown a hole in the wall, man. Look.”

  It was true: he could see the light of a street lamp shining through a great jagged hole.

  “Some bomb,” he muttered. “Let’s clear.”

  He gave a final flash of his torch round the floor, as they moved towards the shattered wall, and then suddenly stopped.

  “What’s that?”

  Right in the centre of the beam, lying in the middle of the floor, was a small chamois-leather bag. It seemed unhurt, and, without thinking, Hugh picked it up and put it in his pocket. Then, switching off the torch, they both clambered through the hole, dropped on to a lean-to roof, and reached the ground.

  They were at the back of the house in some deserted mews, and rapidity of movement was dearly indicated. Already a crowd was hurrying to the scene of the explosion, and slipping quietly out of the dark alley, they joined in themselves.

  “Go home, Ted,” said Drummond. “I must get the others.”

  “Right, old man.” He made no demur, but just vanished quietly, while his leader slouched on towards the front door of Number 5, Green Street. The police were already beating on it, while a large knot of interested spectators giving gratuitous advice stood around them. And in the crowd Drummond could see six of his gang: six anxious men who had determined—police or no police—to get upstairs and see what had happened. In one and all their minds was a sickening fear, that the man they followed had at last bitten off more than he could chew—that they’d find him blown to pieces in the mysterious room upstairs.

  And then, quite clear and distinct above the excited comments of the crowd, came the hooting of an owl. A strange sound to hear in a London street, but no one paid any attention. Other more engrossing matters were on hand, more engrossing that is to all except the six men who instantaneously swung half round as they heard it. For just a second they had a glimpse of a huge figure standing in the light of a lamp-post on the other side of the street—then it disappeared. And with astonishing celerity they followed its example. Whoever had been hurt it was not Drummond; and that, at the moment, was all they were concerned with.

  By devious routes they left the scene of the explosion—each with the same goal in his mind. The owl had only hooted once, which meant that they were to reassemble as soon as possible: the second call, which meant disperse, had not been given. And so within an hour six young men, shorn of all disguise and clad in immaculate evening clothes, were admitted to Drummond’s house in Brook Street by a somewhat sleepy Denny.

  They found Hugh arrayed in a gorgeous dressing-gown with a large tankard of beer beside him, and his wife sitting on the arm of his chair.

  “Beer, souls,” he grunted. “In the corner, as usual.”

  “What happened, old lad?” asked Peter Darrell.

  “I got handed the frozen mitten. I asked for bread, and they put across a half-brick. To be absolutely accurate we got into the room all right, and having got in we found we couldn’t get out. Then someone switched on the light, and bunged a bomb at us through a hole in the door. Quite O.K., old girl “—he put a reassuring arm round Phyllis’s waist—”I think we’d be still there if they hadn’t.”

  “Is Ted all right?” asked Toby Sinclair.

  “Yes. Ted’s all right. Got a young load of bricks in his back when the ceiling came down—but he’s all right. It’s the other poor devil—Ginger Martin.” His face was grim and stern, and the others waited in silence for him to continue.

  “There was a big desk in the room, and the bomb fell on one side of it.
Ted and I gave our well-known impersonation of an earthworm on the other, which saved us. Unfortunately, Ginger Martin elected to run round in small circles and curse. And he will curse no more.”

  “Dead?” Peter Darrell’s voice was low.

  “Very,” answered Drummond quietly. “In fact, he’s now giving his well-known impersonation of a wallpaper. The poor blighter was blown to pieces. If he’d done what I told him he wouldn’t have been, but that’s beside the point. He was working for me, and he was killed while he was doing so. And I don’t like that happening.”

  “Oh! my dear,” said Phyllis. “I do wish you’d give it up. You’ve escaped this time, but sooner or later they’ll get you. It isn’t worth it.”

  Drummond shook his head, and again encircled his wife’s waist with his arm.

  “You wouldn’t like me to let that poor devil’s death go unavenged, would you?” He looked up at her, and she shrugged her shoulders resignedly. A year of marriage with this vast husband of hers had convinced her of the futility of arguing with him once his mind was made up. “Not that the country will be appreciably worse off for his departure, but that’s not the point. He was doing a job for me when it happened, and I don’t stand for that at all.”

  “What do you propose to do?” demanded Jerry Seymour, thoughtfully refilling his glass.

  “Well, there, old son, at the moment you have me beat,” conceded Hugh. “I sort of figured it out this way. Whoever the bird is who bunged that bomb, he recognised me as being the leader of our little bunch. I mean it was me he was staring at through the door, with eyes bubbling over with tenderness and love. It was me that bally bomb was intended for—not Ginger Martin, though he was actually doing the work. And if this cove is prepared to wreck his own office just to get me out of the way—I guess I must be somewhat unpopular.”

  “The reasoning seems extraordinary profound,” murmured Peter.

  “Now the great point is—does he know who I am?” continued Hugh. “Is the little treasure now saying to himself, what time he lowers the evening cup of bread-and-milk, ‘That has settled the hash of one Hugh Drummond,’ or is he merely saying, ‘I have nastily disintegrated the leader of the Black Gang’?”

  “But what’s it matter anyway?” demanded Toby. “He hasn’t disintegrated you, and he’s smashed up his own office—so I fail to see where he wins the grand piano.”

  “That, old Toby, is where you show yourself incapable of grasping the finer points of the situation.” Hugh thoughtfully lit a cigarette. “Our great difficulty before Zaboleff was kind enough to present us with the address of their headquarters was to get in touch with the man at the top. And now the headquarters are no more. No man can work in an office with periodical boulders falling on his head from the roof, and a large hole in the wall just behind him. I mean there’s no privacy about it. And so—unless he knows me—he won’t be able to carry on the good work when he finds that neither of my boots has reached the top of St. Paul’s. We shall be parted again—which is dreadful to think of. There’s no cheery little meeting-ground where we can foregather for the matutinal Martini or even Manhattan. Why, we might even pass one another in the street as complete strangers.”

  “I get you,” said Peter. “And you don’t know him.”

  “Not well enough to call him Bertie. There’s a humpbacked blighter up there who calls himself a Count, and on whom I focused the old optic for about two seconds the other evening. But whether he’s the humorist who bunged the bomb or not is a different matter.” He glanced up as the door opened. “What is it, Denny?”

  “I found this bag, sir, in the pocket of the coat you were wearing tonight.”

  His servant came into the room carrying the chamois-leather bag, which he handed to Drummond.

  “Will you be wanting anything more tonight, sir?”

  “No, thank you, Denny. You toddle off to bye-bye. And give Mrs. Denny a chaste salute from Mr. Darrell.”

  “Very good, sir!”

  The door closed behind him, and Hugh stared thoughtfully at the bag in his hand.

  “I’d forgotten about this. Saw it lying on the floor, just before we hopped it. Hullo! it’s sealed.”

  “For goodness’ sake be careful, boy!” cried Phyllis. “It may be another bomb.”

  Hugh laughed and ripped open the bag; then his eyes slowly widened in amazement as he saw the contents.

  “Great Scott!” he cried. “What the devil have we got here?”

  He emptied the bag out on to the table, and for a moment or two the others stared silently at half a dozen objects that flashed and glittered with a thousand fires. Five of them were white; but the sixth—appreciably larger than the others, and they were the size of walnuts—was a wonderful rose pink.

  “What on earth are they? Lumps of glass?”

  With a hand that shook a little, Toby Sinclair picked one of them up and examined it.

  “No, you fellows,” he muttered, “they’re diamonds!”

  “Rot!” cried Hugh incredulously.

  “They’re diamonds,” repeated Toby. “I happen to know something about precious stones. These are diamonds.”

  “But they must be worth a lot,” said Phyllis, picking up the pink one.

  “Worth a lot,” said Toby dazedly. “Worth a lot! Why, Mrs. Hugh, they are literally worth untold gold in the right market. They are absolutely priceless. I’ve never even thought of such stones. That one that you’re holding in your hand would be worth over a quarter of a million pounds, if you could get the right buyer.”

  For a moment no one spoke; then Hugh laughed cheerily.

  “Bang goes next month’s dress allowance, old thing!” He swept them all into the bag, and stood up. “I’m laying even money that the bomb-thrower is coughing some and then again over his bread-and-milk. This bag must have been in the desk.” His shoulders began to shake. “How frightfully funny!”

  CHAPTER IX

  In Which There Is a Stormy Supper Party at the Ritz

  It was just about the time that Ginger Martin’s wife became, all unconsciously, a widow, that the sitting-room bell of a certain private suite in the Ritz was rung. The occupants of the room were two in number—a man and a woman—and they had arrived only that morning from the Continent. The man, whose signature in the register announced him to be the Reverend Theodosius Longmoor—looked a splendid specimen of the right sort of clergyman. Tall, broad-shouldered, with a pair of shrewd, kindly eyes and a great mass of snow-white hair, he was the type of man who attracted attention wherever he went, and in whatever society he found himself. A faint twang in his speech betrayed his nationality, and, indeed, he made no secret of it. He was an American born and bred, who had been seeing first hand for himself some of the dreadful horrors of the famine which was ravaging Central Europe.

  And with him had gone his daughter Janet—that faithful, constant companion of his, who since her mother’s death had never left him. She was a good-looking girl, too—though perhaps unkind people might have said girlhood’s happy days had receded somewhat into the past. Thirty, perhaps—even thirty-five—though her father always alluded to her as “My little girl.”

  There was something very sweet and touching about their relationship; his pride in her and her simple, loving adoration for Dad. Only that evening before dinner they had got into conversation in the lounge with a party of American globe-trotters, who had unanimously voted them quite charming.

  “I feel,” had said the Reverend Theodosius, “that it is almost wicked our staying in such an hotel as this, after the dreadful things we’ve seen. How my little girl stood it at all I don’t know.” He took his daughter’s hand and patted it lovingly.

  “I guess,” said Janet with her faint, sweet smile. “I guess the Dad deserves it. Why he nearly worked himself ill doing relief work and things out there in Vienna and places.”

  “Is there any lack of funds, Mr. Longmoor?” asked one lady. “One feels one ought to do something to help.”

&n
bsp; The Reverend Theodosius gave her one of his rare sweet smiles.

  “There was when I left,” he murmured. “You’d never believe how money goes out there, and really the poor children have very little to show for it.”

  “Too bad—too bad.” A square-jawed man who was a member of the party beckoned to a passing waiter. “Say, Mr. Longmoor, will you drink a cocktail with me? And your daughter, too?”

  “It is very good of you, sir,” answered the clergyman, with a courteous bow. “My little girl has never even tasted one and I think perhaps she had better not. What do you think, my child?”

  “I’d love to try. Daddy, dear,” she said coaxingly. “Do you think I might? Or would it make my head go funny?”

  They all laughed.

  “That settles it. Miss Longmoor,” cried the man. “I’ve ordered one for you, and if you don’t drink it your father will have to drink two.”

  Undoubtedly a charming couple had been the verdict of these chance acquaintances—so simple, so fresh, so unassuming in these days of complexity and double-dealing. The only pity of it was, as the square-jawed man remarked to his wife at dinner, that the very quality of child-like simplicity which made them so charming was the one which laid them open to the most barefaced swindling if they ever came up against blackguards.

  After dinner they had all drunk coffee together, and then, because his little Janet was tired, the Reverend Theodore and his daughter had retired after accepting an invitation to dinner the next day.

  “Who are they?” asked Janet, as they entered their sitting-room.

  “That square-jawed man is John Pendel,” answered her father, thoughtfully lighting a cigar. “Worth about three million. He’s good for dining with, though I’m not over here on any sideshows.”

  And then for two hours until he got up and rang the bell, the Reverend Theodosius remained engrossed in work; while his little Janet, lying on the sofa, displayed considerably more leg than one would have expected a vicar’s daughter even to possess. And occasional gurgles of laughter seemed to prove that Guy de Maupassant appeals to a more catholic audience than he would have suspected.