Handbags & Hooligans

by Laina Turner

“That’s the funny part. She hasn’t actually told them. She just enjoys knowing herself that she could give Mom a heart attack at anytime.” Sweetie laughed. “Pretty funny if you ask me.”

  “Sometimes that’s all that matters. Knowing yourself. I’m glad she has you to watch out for her. That’s a nice brother.” I did think it was nice; I had a pretty good relationship with Jesse over the years, though I wasn’t sure he’d be as supportive of me working in a strip club. And it was because of that relationship I wanted more information about Ashley. “What’s your real name?

  “What, you don’t like Sweetie?”

  “It’s not that. It’s actually very fitting in a way.” He looked curious so I continued. “Well, no offense, but at first glance you look anything but sweet. So in a strange way it makes sense. But I just doubt that’s the name your parents put on your birth certificate.”

  “I guess. Although I think your logic is a bit flawed, I’ll take it. Eugene.”

  “Eugene?”

  “Yep. Eugene Franklin Grant. Named after my grandpa”

  “Hmmm. Okay, no offense to your grandpa, but I can see why you have a nickname.”

  He laughed. “None taken”

  “Where did Sweetie come from?”

  “That is actually Michelle’s fault. My mom called both of us sweetie, it’s her favorite endearment, so as a little girl Michelle picked it up. She and mom would walk me out to the bus stop each morning, and Michelle would scream ‘Bye–bye, sweetie!’ All the kids thought it hilarious and started calling me that. Once I got over being mortified, and after a few schoolyard fights to get kids to stop teasing me, I figured it was better than Eugene. So it just stuck. Besides, once I started to grow, no one would dare to tease me.”

  “Cute.”

  “So tell me, Presley, what is it you do when you’re not in Vegas helping your brother by picking up part–time gigs waitressing at strip clubs?”

  “I live in Chicago, and I’m a bit between careers at the moment. You could say I’m trying to find myself. I’m currently working in retail.”

  “Find yourself. Is that some new age–y thing?”

  “Listen here, Eugene, don’t knock it,” I said playfully. “I spent years climbing the corporate ladder just to jump off the top rung without as much as a few cute firemen to catch me.”

  “Nice analogy.”

  “What I mean is, I left a job I’d thought I loved without a backup plan. You would think at my age I would have a backup plan, but I didn’t. I wrote for an online magazine for a while, and that didn’t work out so well; the magazine folded after only a few issues. Now I manage a women’s boutique. While I admit I do love the discount and the fashion aspect, it’s not what I want to do for the next twenty years. I do have some great clothes. But that’s just it. I’m not sure what I want to do for the next twenty years.” I shrugged. “I’m sure I’ll figure it out eventually. Maybe, like you said, a waitress. Maybe that’s my next calling.”

  “I didn’t mean it as a life career, but, hey, you never know. Any special guys in your life?”

  “Yes and no.”

  “How’s that?”

  “It’s one of those complicated things where you like each other, but the timing and all is not good and makes it difficult.”

  “Ah, I get it.”

  “You? Any special gal?”

  “There was. I recently got dumped.” He smiled ruefully. “The job, you know.”

  “I can imagine that a lot of girls would not be too thrilled with your current place of employment.”

  “Yeah, I know. We had been together for a few years, though, and I thought she could handle it. You live and you learn, I guess.”

  “She wasn’t worth quitting for?” I thought maybe Sweetie wasn’t the good guy I’d come to believe he was, to choose a job at a strip club over his longtime girlfriend.

  He must have had an idea of what was going through my mind because he quickly said, “It’s one of those complicated things. I did offer to quit, and she didn’t care. By that point, she thought that the fact I would even consider working at a place like The Pink Pony meant something was wrong with me.”

  “Not very open–minded, was she?”

  “You could say that, but in her defense, most women would probably feel that way.”

  “True. I’m sure I would, even though I like to think of myself as open and trusting.”

  “I guess it just wasn’t meant to be.”

  I smiled. He was a pretty interesting guy. This wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. It was comfortable and easy. Maybe because there wasn’t any pressure? “I know you don’t want me to keep asking about Ashley, but you have to help us find her.”

  “Presley, if I knew where she was I would tell you.”

  “I know you don’t know where she is, but you’ve worked with her for a long time. You have to have an idea of where she might be or what happened. Did someone force her to leave? Is she on an extended holiday with some new guy she met? I’m looking for anything here that could help us.”

  “I can assure you she’s faithful to your brother. Other than that, I don’t know. No one was bothering her, at least at the club, and I would know.”

  “Will you tell me if you hear anything?”

  “Of course.”

  Chapter 11

  I opened the door to Jesse’s apartment. I could hear voices as I walked down the hall, so I assumed Jesse was home and Jared and Anna hadn’t yet left for the male review show. Closing the door behind me, I set my purse down and walked into the kitchen.

  “Hey, guys, look whose back from her date,” Cooper said, lifting a bottle of Corona in my direction and smiling. Considering he had been drinking when I left a few hours ago, he must’ve been feeling pretty happy.

  “It wasn’t a date! You all have been sitting around drinking when I have been hard at work trying to find Ashley? And what are you still doing here?” I looked pointedly at Cooper.

  “I hardly think going on a date that includes an all–you–can–eat buffet constitutes hard work,” Cooper said.

  “And I just got home from talking to Ashley’s friends again,” Jesse said. “I was waiting for you to get back so we could figure out our next steps.”

  “It wasn’t a date, and you didn’t answer. Why are you still here?” I said to Cooper.

  “Geezz, Pres,” Jesse said. “Don’t be so hard on the guy. He’s here to help us.”

  Jared was enjoying how uncomfortable I was. “Yeah, Pres. He has some information that could be useful.”

  He knew I liked Cooper; in fact that was partly what was keeping me from being nice to him. God, I wished Cooper weren’t so handsome. If he were ugly, I wouldn’t have been so worried that he would break my heart. Though, if he were ugly I might not be attracted to him to begin with. “Let’s hear it, then. How can you help?”

  “Jesse told me about the arrest and the guy who is trying to move in on Bud’s territory. I called Simon to see if he knew this guy and how we might be able to get him off Jesse’s back. Especially if the guy is bothering Jesse at work; that’s Simon’s territory. He wasn’t happy this was happening.”

  “Thanks, Cooper,” I said my attitude softening a bit. “I thought about Simon, but I wasn’t so sure he would want to hear from me.”

  “He has no hard feelings for you, Pres. He knows his dad is a dirt bag.”

  My assignment as a writer for an online magazine had been to interview Senator Daniels. To make a long story short, the Senator ended up murdered, and during my investigation I found the senator had owed the mob a lot of money—the mob in this case being Garrison Palazzo, whose son Simon had been working for Cooper. Come to find out Simon didn’t follow in his father’s footsteps and was an upstanding guy. He now ran his dad’s empire—the legal side of it—and was engaged to the senator’s widow, Helen. Talk about complicated. “So, what is he going to do?”

  “He said he needed to check on a few things and would call me
back.”

  “I can’t believe I let you talk me into this,” I yelled over the loud music to Jared. Since we had to wait for Cooper to call me back Jared had convinced us to go to a show.

  “What are you talking about Presley? This is great!” Anna said.

  She’d already had a lot to drink, so I decided not to take her opinion on anything until she sobered up.

  “I can’t believe you got him to come,” Jared said, looking over his shoulder at where Cooper was sitting.

  “Ha! I know, right? That’s worth it right there.” After all the Corona Cooper had consumed, it wasn’t hard to convince him.

  We were at What a Drag! — the longest running cabaret drag show in Las Vegas, featuring the Queens of Las Vegas. After Jared had booked our flights, he had immediately Googled Las Vegas drag shows and had come up with this one. It was at a club called the Freezone, and it sure was hopping. Cooper had been a good sport about coming along, but he was a bit out of his element, a fact I found very amusing. It was rare to get Cooper in any situation where he was less than comfortable. I kind of liked this side of him. I had felt bad going out in light of everything, but Jesse said there was no sense in all of us sitting around waiting, and that Anna needed to go out and have some fun, which was true.

  “Oh my God, look, it’s Cher and Madonna.” Jared was beside himself with excitement as he watched the female impersonators walk through the room to the door that presumably led them backstage. He was acting like a schoolgirl. I was amazed at how good these guys looked. They put on their makeup better than I did. They were able to transform themselves completely into the star they were impersonating. I wondered how the stars they were impersonating felt about it—flattered or annoyed. Though I guess it all comes with the territory. I could hear the music cue. The first few notes got everyone’s attention, and out on stage walked Madonna with a mike in her/his hand.

  “Whoohoo!” Anna catcalled.

  She was quickly becoming out of control, but at least at a place like this I didn’t have to babysit her as much. There weren’t many guys interested in women to bother her.

  The crowd went wild. This guy was a great Madonna look–alike, and he wasn’t a half bad singer either.

  “I think I’m in love,” swooned Jared.

  “You and everyone else in here,” I said. But I was wowed, too. Not only did they have the looks, but they were talented as well. “Cooper, what do you think?”

  “Interesting”

  “Come on, it’s more than interesting,” I teased.

  “Okay, you’re right. It’s definitely more than interesting. I admit these, uh, performers look incredible. I would never have thought they would look so…so…real.”

  “They sure could teach me a thing or two about makeup.”

  “I don’t know about that. You always look good to me.”

  “Thanks.” I smiled, wondering if it was Cooper’s comment or the wine that was making me feel all warm and fuzzy.

  As the show continued, we were amazed by one performer after another … Madonna, Cher, Christina Aguilera. At intermission the ladies came from backstage and mingled with the crowd. Jared was in heaven, and even Cooper was enjoying himself. Madonna seemed to find him attractive and was being a little flirtatious. Cooper took it in stride and had fun with it.

  There was a lot of audience participation in the second half of the show, which was good for Anna. I could tell that at least for a while she hadn’t been thinking about Jeff. After the show, Cooper and I waited out front for Jared and Anna, who had bought a program and were running around the place trying to get all the performers’ autographs. Jared was definitely starstruck.

  “I got’em!” he said excitedly. “I’m ready to go. Thanks for waiting, guys.”

  “You got all the autographs?” I asked.

  “That and a few numbers and an invite to a party tomorrow night.”

  “You go, Jared,” Cooper said, laughing.

  “I want an In–N–Out Burger,” Anna said.

  She probably needed something in her stomach to soak up all the alcohol she had consumed. Not that I blamed her. As far as I was concerned, she could let loose all week as long as it kept her from taking that loser Jeff back.

  We told the cab driver to take us to the burger joint, and when we got there Anna wasn’t the only drunk person with that idea. The place was packed. The drive–through line wrapped around the building twice. We sat in line for forty–three dollars worth of cab fare before finally getting up to the order window. This better be a good burger.

  The cabby was nice enough to let us eat in his vehicle, and after a few bites I admitted I could see what all the hype was about.

  “I know, right?” Anna said, stuffing her face with fries. “This hits the spot.”

  “It’s one of the things I love about traveling out West. There’s just some food you can’t get on the other side of the country,” I said.

  Chapter 12

  We woke up early, which was painful after all the fun we had the night before. I needed to drop Cooper off at the airport so he could get to Los Angeles where he had been headed before making a detour to Vegas. He had a client meeting he couldn’t push off any later.

  Last night he’d wanted to talk about us—as in, him and me—but I kept avoiding the topic until we’d run out of time. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to talk or try to figure things out between us; it’s just that I wasn’t sure what to say. And until I was, I didn’t want to have the discussion. I told Cooper that after we found Ashley I would sit down with him. He hadn’t been thrilled, but he hadn’t seemed too upset either. We both knew it could wait. After all, we had already waited this long; hopefully just a few more days wouldn’t hurt.

  But I had to admit I already missed him, and he wasn’t even gone yet. As much as I’d been against him showing up and confusing my emotions, he was great to have around. Maybe we could eventually figure this out.

  “Before I go through security to my gate, do you mind waiting here with my stuff while I make a phone call?” he said. “I need to call back to the office.”

  “Okay, sure. I’ll wait over here.”

  Cooper walked away, and I wondered what he didn’t want me to overhear. Setting down his overnight bag, I watched as he pulled out his phone and punched in a number.

  “Thanks,” Cooper said when he returned to where I was waiting not so patiently.

  I’d only been able to hear a few words of his phone conversation. “What was that all about?”

  “Just checking in to get any last minute information I need before this client in L.A. picks me up at the airport.”

  “You couldn’t do that in front of me?” I raised my eyebrows in questioning.

  “Some things need to stay confidential.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Whatever.” I didn’t believe him for a second. I was sure it was something about Ashley, so I guess I shouldn’t have been annoyed. I just wanted the scoop.

  “I will call you when I’m done with my meetings tonight.”

  “Okay,” I said, walking him to the security gate.

  He leaned down and kissed me. “Stay out of trouble,” he warned.

  As if it would do any good. And he knew by now it wouldn’t. Then he winked at me and walked through the gate.

  Anna, Jared, Jesse and I were hanging out in my brother’s apartment wondering what to do next. I turned to them and said, “Sweetie suggested I work at The Pink Pony for a few days, and of course Anna volunteered to do it with me.” She was all about finding things to do to take her mind off Jeff. It was exactly what she needed. A distraction. “He said I could gain a wealth of information and could probably make a lot of money at the same time.” I purposely hadn’t told Cooper, knowing he would not be thrilled, to say the least.

  “What?” Jesse and Jared shouted in unison.

  Jared leaned in closer to me. “Are you crazy? Now, there isn’t anything wrong with being a stripper, honey, but I seriously doubt yo
u’re cut out for that.”

  Anna started laughing uncontrollably.

  I gave Jared a dirty look. “I’m not sure if I should take offense at that or not, but I’ll let it slide. I didn’t mean to be a stripper, you idiot. Sweetie suggested I could be a waitress. Get to know the clients, patrons, customers, whatever you call those folks. He said maybe it would help us find out something, and frankly I could always use some extra cash. It looks like we might be staying out here a few extra days, and I might as well make it a working trip, since I won’t be getting paid for missing work at Silk.”

  That was one thing I needed to work out with James. When I’d originally started at Silk there weren’t any benefits, and I could understand that, being it was a small boutique and all. But now that I was managing the boutique I felt I should at least get some vacation time. I made a mental note to address it with James when I got back.

  “I think it’s a good idea,” Anna exclaimed. “Between the two of us, surely we’ll find something out. Oh, this will be fun.”

  “Are you sure he just doesn’t want to see you in a skimpy outfit?” Jesse asked.

  “I’m thinking the same thing, Jess,” Jared said. “I think our friend Sweetie has ulterior motives.”

  “Stop it, you guys,” I said. “He doesn’t just want me hanging out at the club so he can see me. He’s not interested in me that way. He knew Ashley pretty well. He wants to find her, too. He really seems like a genuinely nice guy.”

  “Maybe you’re right,” Jared conceded, “but I’m sure that it’s a double bonus that you would be half naked.”

  I decided I was just going to ignore them. “Do you think it could help? That’s the important question.”

  “Presley, I’m not sure it would help just based on the fact that you’re a klutz, and I’m not sure that serving people drinks is a great fit for you. They aren’t going to tell you anything if you’re spilling stuff on them.”

  “Jared, you’re so negative. I’m not that bad.”

  “Remember that time at Muldoon’s where—”

  “Just stop. No need to dredge up old history. Do you think it might help us find out something about Ashley?”