Aliens Stole My Body

by Bruce Coville

  Can I go back to Dimension X now? thought Seymour. I don’t like it here anymore.

  “Now, come along, I want to show you something, Mrs. Allbright,” said BKR, sounding as if he were trying to sell her a washing machine. “Bonzetta, keep an eye on Snout and Pong. If they make the slightest move, blast them. Don’t kill them, of course.” He turned to Mom and said with a smile, “I never let anyone die that easily. Now, after you, Mrs. A.”

  Mom, who looked numb, headed in the direction he indicated. The twins, clinging and whimpering, went along after her. So did Elspeth.

  You should go, too, thought Snout. Learn all you can. It’s our best chance for surviving.

  So Seymour and I trotted along behind them.

  The ship, being built on the same plans as the Ferkel, was painfully familiar to me.

  BKR led the way to the sick bay—or what had been the sick bay. He had ripped out the healing lamps and replaced them with some devices of his own. In the center of the room were three containers. Each had tubes and wires running into the bottom, and a crystal clear top.

  Inside the first container, still as death, like Snow White in her glass coffin, lay Phil the Plant.

  Inside the second floated Grakker.

  Inside the third, achingly close yet impossible to reach, was the thing I wanted most in all the world.

  My body.

  CHAPTER

  19

  Time to Choose

  WITH A SCREAM MY MOTHER flung herself onto the case.

  “My baby!” she cried. “What have you done to my baby?”

  I wasn’t sure if she was really that upset over seeing my body like that, or if she was faking for BKR’s benefit. Either way, it was kind of embarrassing.

  “Oh, do calm yourself, Mrs. Allbright,” said BKR coolly. “The truth is, I’ve taken quite good care of dear little Roddie. In that stasis tube he will neither age nor change. He’s in exactly the same condition he was in when I got him: a good physical specimen, with absolutely zero brain activity. Actually, that seems to be fairly common among you Earthlings. Now, if you do have any idea where the contents of Rod’s brain have gotten to, I’d suggest you tell me. After all, you and I actually want the same thing—to reunite your son’s mind with his body. We’re natural allies, if you think about it.”

  Mom, still facedown on the container that held my body, shook her head without saying a word.

  BKR sighed. “So be it. I had hoped we could do this the easy way. Well, just to be sure you’re telling the truth, we’d better test you a bit.”

  Mom lifted her head from the case. Tears streamed down her face. “What do you mean?”

  BKR shrugged. “Surely you can see that I have to be positive you’re not holding back any information before we bother to go all the way to the center of the galaxy.” He smiled. “Fortunately, we have the twins with us. I think the threat of tossing one of them out of the ship somewhere between here and Mars should get you to tell me anything you know, don’t you?”

  The blood drained from Mom’s face. “You wouldn’t!”

  BKR’s eyes went hard. In a voice as cold and empty as space itself, he said, “Madame, you have no idea what I am capable of.”

  I heard the echo of Madame Pong’s voice from when she first told me about BKR and his cruelty: Millions have wept.

  BKR pulled out his ray gun. “Now, I think it’s time we returned to the main cabin.”

  * * *

  The walk back to the main cabin was the longest of my life. Though the thought terrified me, I knew I would give up both my brain and my body to save the twins if I had to. The problem was, it wasn’t simply my own life I would have been risking by revealing myself to BKR; it was the life of everyone in the galaxy.

  I figured this must be even harder on Mom than it was on me. Even if she knew I was willing to have her give me up, how could she choose between two of her children?

  Stay calm, thought Snout. Stay calm.

  He was right; panic wasn’t the answer. The problem was, panic seemed to be the logical response to this situation.

  We re-entered the main cabin. Madame Pong and Snout were right where we had left them. Two of BKR’s henchbeings—Bonzetta and the fishy-looking one—were lounging on chairs. They had their ray guns out, but they seemed very relaxed. Arly Bung was still standing, watching the prisoners with those huge, insectoid eyes of hers.

  “Quice, I want to leave the planet,” said BKR. “Make it happen.”

  The alien who looked like Quat sighed and went to the control panel. It fiddled with some dials. The ship rose, and my heart sank.

  Elspeth turned to Snout and Madame Pong. “They’ve got Grakker and Phil,” she said breathlessly.

  Snout already knew that, of course, since he had seen it through our eye. But though Madame Pong tried to conceal her response, I caught a fleeting moment of shock and dismay in her eyes that told me our Mental Master had not shared this bad news. Which made sense; there was no point in letting our enemies know that he could see what I saw.

  “Goodness,” said BKR, rolling his eyes. “I forgot to mention that, didn’t I? Well, the child is right. One of my people captured your friends before they could make their way back to Galactic Headquarters. Poor Grakker; always such a stickler for rules, and now he’s a mutineer. I almost let him go, since it would have been such fun to think of his misery and humiliation when he arrived at Galactic Headquarters. Alas, there was always the chance he would have actually gotten the boneheads that run things to believe him, and messed up my plans. Couldn’t let that happen, could we?” He turned to Quince. “How are we doing?”

  “We have left Earth’s grav-field,” replied the fishlike alien. “Do you want me to move into hyper-mode?”

  “I live in hyper-mode,” said BKR gleefully. “But don’t take the ship there yet. We have some business to do first.”

  He went to stand before my mother. The twins were clinging to her sides.

  “You’re a poopy face!” said Little Thing One.

  “We hate you!” added Little Thing Two.

  “Such charming children,” said BKR. “It seems a shame to have to sacrifice either of them. Oh, well. There’s nothing to be done for it. Now, which one shall it be?”

  He pointed at Little Thing One and began to recite a rhyme, moving his finger back and forth as he spoke.

  “Iggitty Biggitty

  Boggitty Boo,

  Today’s the day

  I’m choosing you!”

  He ended by pointing at Little Thing Two.

  “Oops, too bad!” said BKR with a smile. “You’re it! I don’t know why I bother, actually, since it always comes out the same way. I knew it would be you before I started. Quince, open the airlock. We have someone who needs to experience the wonders of space.”

  He picked up Little Thing Two. Immediately Little Thing One launched herself at him. “You let go of my brother, you poophead!” she cried.

  My sentiments exactly.

  I was surprised, though I shouldn’t have been, when my mother did much the same thing. With a scream that came from someplace so deep inside herself I don’t think she had even known it was there, she flung herself at BKR. Elspeth and Bonehead joined the fray as well. So did Seymour and I, though we were hardly built for fighting.

  The battle was over in seconds. Arly Bung, Quince, and Bonzetta used their stun ray on poor Bonehead, who had turned into a whirling fury of fur and fang. Then they peeled Mom and Elspeth and Little Thing Two away from BKR, who had been laughing hysterically throughout the entire scene.

  “Nicely done,” he said when it was all over. “Though I would have expected no less from the wife of Ah-rit Alber Ite.”

  Mom’s eyes were wild. Her hair looked like it had been combed with a blender. Her chest was heaving and her blouse was torn. “You’re vile,” she said, spitting the words out as if they were poison in her mouth.

  “I know,” replied BKR with a smile. “Now, let’s get on with our
business, shall we? Is the inner door open, Quince?”

  “Ready as requested, Captain.”

  Little Thing Two was crying. Elspeth pulled away from Bonzetta’s grasp. “Take me instead!” she said defiantly.

  “Bad trade,” said BKR, shaking his head.

  “Then take us both,” she said, reaching out for Little Thing Two.

  “Now that’s not a bad idea!” said BKR. “Doubles the stakes. I kind of like that.”

  Elspeth ignored him. She had Little Thing Two in her arms and was trying to quiet him, whispering that everything was going to be all right.

  There is more to your cousin than we have suspected, said Snout in my head.

  You’re not kidding, I replied.

  Elspeth carried Little Thing Two to an opening on the far side of the cabin. She looked back at us, took a deep breath, then stepped in.

  The door closed behind them.

  BKR turned to my mother. “You have thirty seconds, Mrs. Allbright. At the end of that time you either tell me where Rod’s brain patterns have been stored, or we will open the outer door, and whooosh!, out go the brats, sucked into the vast emptiness of space. Take your time, dear. You have twenty-one seconds left.”

  He began counting.

  Mom looked around frantically.

  Come on! I thought to Seymour.

  We ran over to stand beside her. But how could I get the message across that I wanted her to tell him where I was. I knew she was hesitating because she didn’t think he would really do something so awful.

  I also knew she was wrong. He would do it.

  “Five,” said BKR. “Four. Three. Two.”

  “Wait!” said Madame Pong and Mom simultaneously.

  “Ah,” said BKR, turning to Madame Pong. “Another country heard from. And pray, what do you have to tell us, Pong?”

  “Rod’s brain patterns are stored in the belly of the little blue creature standing next to Mrs. Allbright.”

  BKR burst into hysterical laughter. “You’ll have to do better than that, Pong!” he said. “You expect me to believe such a ridiculous story?”

  “It’s true!” cried my mother. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. “It’s true. It’s true!”

  “Ladies, you insult me,” said BKR. “The count is one, the count is done. Quince, open the outer door. Let the brats eat vacuum!”

  CHAPTER

  20

  Journey to the Center of the Galaxy

  “NOT SO FAST,” SAID A new voice.

  We all turned in surprise. Well, all of us except Madame Pong and Snout; they couldn’t move, because of the blue rings.

  It was Selima Khan. She had stepped out from behind a panel in the wall of the room. She had a ray blaster in each hand, and a don’t-mess-with-me look on her lizardlike face.

  “Get away from that control panel,” she said to Quince.

  When the scaly alien seemed to hesitate, she punctuated the order with a shot from the blaster in her right hand. The red ray passed directly over Quince’s head, missing it by about two inches.

  “Make any move except directly away from that panel, and the next shot will be lower,” she said softly. At the same time she fired a shot with her left blaster. Arly Bung hissed in pain, and dropped her ray gun.

  “Drop yours, too, Bonzetta,” said Selima Khan sharply. “And move it, Quince!”

  The water-breather glanced at his boss. BKR nodded. Quince backed away from the panel.

  “Now open the inner door, Mrs. Allbright,” said Selima Khan. “I’ll tell you which button to push.”

  Mom went to the control panel and did as Selima Khan directed.

  The inner door slid open. Elspeth and Little Thing Two came hurtling into the room, straight to my mother’s arms. She caught them up and held them close, crying softly into their hair.

  “Care to tell me what you’re doing on my ship?” asked BKR. His voice was calm, but you could sense the fury seething beneath it.

  “Not until you and your gang are under control,” replied Selima Khan. “Elspeth, take the blue rings off Madame Pong and Flinge Iblik. Put one on BKR, the other on Arly Bung. We’ll tend to Bonzetta and Quince when we have a chance to look for more rings.”

  Elspeth moved to do as Selima Khan requested.

  She had just lifted the ring from Madame Pong’s head when a hideous orange creature came roaring into the room.

  I recognized him at once; it was our old enemy, Smorkus Flinders.

  Selima Khan turned and fired at him with both ray guns. One shot went wide, the other struck him on the shoulder. Smorkus Flinders howled in pain, but continued straight at her, knocking her to the ground.

  The ray guns flew out of her hands and went skittering across the floor. Quince snatched at one. Elspeth hurled herself at the other, but Arly Bung got it first. Bonehead, barking like a maniac, attached himself to Smorkus Flinders’s foot. The orange monster shook his leg, sending the poor little dog flying against the wall. He yelped as he struck it, then fell silent. Edgar, eeeping like crazy, scrambled onto BKR’s back, then onto his head. With a cry of rage BKR ripped the chibling away. I heard an awful tearing sound—some of the orange spikes that grew from BKR’s head had gone with Edgar, leaving finger-sized holes behind. An ugly purple fluid was oozing up from the holes. If BKR felt any pain, he ignored it. Flinging Edgar to the side, he held out his hand to help Smorkus Flinders to his feet.

  “It’s about time you showed up,” he snarled. “If your nap had lasted any longer, we might have all been dead.”

  Smorkus Flinders shrugged his lumpy shoulders. “You’re not,” he said gruffly. “So don’t whine about it.”

  I was the one who felt like whining. Thirty seconds ago we were in control of things. Now the enemy was on top again. And he wasn’t going to let his guard down twice.

  “Slap them in suspended animation,” said BKR. “All of them!”

  “We don’t have enough pods,” said Quince. It sounded nervous.

  “Well you can skip the animals, you fool,” said BKR. “And the twins, if necessary. Now get busy!”

  “Yes, your nastiness,” said the scaly alien. Then he and Arly Bung and Bonzetta hustled us all down to a lower level of the ship, where they proceeded to put everyone except Edgar, Bonehead (who had survived his collision with the wall), and Seymour and me into Sus-An pods.

  * * *

  At first I wondered why BKR didn’t simply jettison us “animals,” as he had threatened to do with Elspeth and Little Thing Two. After a while, I realized there were two reasons. First, he figured he might be able to use us at some point for emotional blackmail; I knew this because I heard him explain it to Bonzetta. Second, it simply amused him to have us around, because we gave him something new to be cruel to. This one I had to figure out on my own, but it wasn’t hard, since he kicked Seymour and me every time he happened to see us—kicked us, and then laughed.

  Poor Bonehead was having a hard time because he couldn’t go outside to pee and stuff. Since he knew he wasn’t supposed to make messes on the floor, he would hold it until he couldn’t stand it any longer, then let go with a rush. I had been worried about what would happen the first time BKR found a puddle of piddle, but as it turned out, the ship’s cleaning robots immediately took care of any messes the dog made. The first time one of them came scuttling out behind Bonehead to take care of one of his “accidents,” it nearly scared the little guy to death. Even so, I was relieved.

  Despite the fact that no one yelled at him for going inside, Bonehead still didn’t like it, and whenever he had to do his business he would stand by a door and whine, hoping for someone to let him out. Poor little guy had no idea that going outside would mean instant death.

  * * *

  I wasn’t totally alone during this time, since I had Seymour to keep me company. That I had expected.

  What I hadn’t expected was Snout. But he had contacted me soon after BKR had ordered everyone put into suspended animation.

  Rod, a
re you there?

  We’re here, I thought excitedly. Where are you?

  My body is in the Sus-An pod, just as BKR ordered. But I beat him to the punch and moved myself into trance state before the pod was activated. This let me shield my mind from the pod’s effects, so I could stay in contact with you.

  Great, I replied. Do you have any suggestions?

  Stay out of BKR’s way as much as you can. Yet at the same time, stay near him when possible. The more you can learn, the better off we’ll be.

  * * *

  It was a strange journey. I was on the ship of my enemy, wandering freely, face to face with him every day—and yet he had no idea I was even there, because he thought I was just some silly creature he was keeping around in the hope that I might prove useful.

  At least once a day Seymour and I slipped into the room where my body was stored. I would stare at it longingly, imagining myself back inside it, aching to feel my own skin, use my own hands and legs. Would I ever get it back?