Rush

by Sara Bennett Wealer

  A car whizzed through the crosswalk against the light. He reached out to keep her from stepping into its path. His forearm touched her chest and she could smell the soap on his skin, which caused her to catch her breath. So far she’d done a decent job reigning in the crush that threatened to turn her into a blithering fool, but being this close to Ben made it harder to deny that she was starting to like him much more than was probably acceptable among professional colleagues.

  “Can I be honest?” he said when they were safely across the street. “You don’t really strike me as the sorority type. Are you sure you want to be in one?”

  Imogen sighed, fiddling with the lid of her soda bottle. “I don’t know. I’m trying to give it a fair chance, but so far this Greek thing just seems like a bunch more rules to me.”

  “Some people thrive on rules.”

  “Yes, but where I come from it’s nothing but rules. Even when you’re breaking the rules there are rules. I came to college for space; I don’t need a group of girls telling me who my friends are supposed to be, making me do stuff I don’t want to do. I mean what about you?” she pressed. “Why did you go Greek? Do you have some sort of problem thinking for yourself?”

  “Whoa now,” said Ben. “I have a ton of friends at OTE.”

  “But you have friends at the Beacon, too, right?”

  “Yes.”

  “From what it sounds like, the two don’t go together all that well. What if you have to investigate the Greek system? Or some politician who’s one of your alums? At the very least, I’d think you’d have a conflict of interest to worry about.”

  “Those are not bad points,” Ben said. The dorm stood ahead of them, quiet since all the girls who lived there were still at rush. “Do you want the truth here?” he asked as they started up the front walk.

  “Sure,” she said.

  “Sometimes I think the fraternity wasn’t the best decision I ever made. Well, not the fraternity per se. I’ve had a great time there. But running for president . . .” He shook his head. “More and more I don’t really know.”

  “Is it the time commitment? Even you have to sleep some time.”

  He shook his head. “It’s more my girlfriend—damn, I can’t believe I’m talking about my love life to someone I just met. Sorry. You’ll think I’m a jerk.”

  Imogen’s heart sank. Of course there’s a girlfriend. How could a guy this great not have a girlfriend? But she put on her most sympathetic smile and said, “I don’t think you’re a jerk. What’s her problem? She doesn’t like your extreme hyperscheduling?”

  He laughed. “Actually, she’s the queen of hyperscheduling. She’s super driven and she has this vision that we’re going to ride off into the sunset and be president and first lady—or maybe I’ll be first man, ’cause God knows she could run the Oval Office and fit in a workout before breakfast. But I just don’t know if that’s what I want, you know?”

  “I think so,” said Imogen.

  “Don’t get me wrong. She’s an amazing girl. She just doesn’t think the Beacon is as prestigious as a dozen other things I could be doing. She thinks I spend too much time there and not enough time building up my résumé in other areas. Stuff like that.”

  “Actually, it sounds like your girlfriend would love my mom. We should set them up for tea whenever Parents’ Weekend rolls around.”

  Then maybe we could push them both off a cliff.

  “I guess I wonder sometimes,” Ben said. “Am I just going along with what everybody else thinks I should do because it’s easier than getting in a fight?”

  Imogen stopped at the front door to the dorm. She looked down at her sandals and cleared her throat, trying to figure out the best way to say good-bye. She pushed the door open with her hip and backed into the dorm lobby, looking into Ben’s awesome green eyes one last time. “You have to do what’s right for you,” she said. “All I can say is that I don’t want to have to wonder. Ever again.”

  SEVENTEEN

  “Where is Imogen Ash?”

  Delia turned on Cass, a wild look in her eyes. The tapping for the last party of the day had just ended and the sisters had broken their formation to give house tours upstairs. Cass had been about to join them when Delia grabbed her by the arm.

  “I’ve been keeping an eye out all day and I haven’t seen her. You’ve been tracking the hostesses. Did she come through and I just missed it?”

  “I don’t think she was here,” Cass said. “I don’t remember sending anybody out for her.”

  “Are you sure?” Cass was alarmed to see actual panic on Delia’s face. She’d seen Delia stressed, even worried. But Delia’s overall cool veneer had always remained pretty much intact.

  Now, however, she looked just the slightest bit unhinged.

  “Unless Imogen managed to sneak in on her own, then she never came through today,” said Cass. “Do you think she cut us?”

  “That’s impossible.” Delia started for the dining room with Cass following behind. Delia flung open the dining room doors, causing Marina Lucci to jump behind her computer.

  “Imogen Ash hasn’t been through today,” Delia said. “I don’t think she could have cut us. I checked the returns this morning, and her name was on the sheet as accepting an invitation back. But maybe I read it wrong. Maybe something’s changed. How could something have changed? Was there a mistake with the reporting?”

  “The latest returns are on the Greek Council intranet,” said Marina. She pulled up the list and hit Print. Delia snatched up the sheet and scanned it.

  Marina looked over Delia’s shoulder. “There she is. According to this, she should have been here.”

  “This can’t be right,” said Delia. “I walked through each party at least three times and she wasn’t there. And Cassandra didn’t see her come in, either. There has to be an explanation.” Delia put her phone on speaker. “So we can all hear the same thing,” she said. “I need to be able to explain this if something’s gone wrong.”

  Greek Council answered and, after checking their records, the recruitment coordinator said Imogen had been excused from the afternoon’s parties in order to fulfill a school obligation.

  “She’s still participating in recruitment,” the coordinator said. “And as far as I can tell, she still has Sigma Theta Kappa as a house of interest. When you fill out your invitations for tomorrow just include her like you would on any other day, and she can accept or decline as normal.”

  “Oh, thank God.” Delia slumped against a table in relief. “I mean, thank you,” she said, then quickly hung up.

  There was an awkward silence. Marina looked uncertainly at Cass, then at Delia, who looked like she’d just escaped some kind of nightmare. Her breathing was shallow, perspiration made her safari tee cling to her skin, and tendrils of hair stuck to her damp forehead. Her eyes still had that wild look, and Cass wondered if she shouldn’t let somebody know that Delia might be letting the stress of rush get to her a bit too much. She was grieving the loss of her dad on top of everything else—who wouldn’t be a basket case in that situation?

  But Delia appeared to be snapping out of it. Before Cass could suggest that she lie down or splash some water on her face, she smoothed her hair and shook the tension from her shoulders.

  “Sorry, it’s just that I hate unnecessary confusion. Marina, when you give us the vote tallies tonight, could you make sure they’re alphabetized? And Cassandra, the tapping was better today. Just see if you still can’t move it along a little faster tomorrow, okay?”

  With that, she turned and swept out of the room. Cass followed back out into the foyer. The ceiling above them pounded with the sound of hundreds of feet, and voices and laughter drifted down the grand staircase. The rushees were deep into their house tours by now. Cass figured she’d better go up and meet a few so she could make a somewhat meaningful contribution to the voting later on.

  She’d made it halfway up the staircase when Violet came running down and pulled her aside.

>   “Something’s up with Madeleine Christopher,” Violet said, full of concern for her favorite underdog rushee. “Aimee Wu took her from her floater and now nobody knows where they are.”

  EIGHTEEN

  “This is our study lounge. We pull all-nighters up here.” The sister showing Maddy around the Sigma house led her into an empty room that was lined with computer carrels. They’d made their way up to the third floor, where there weren’t as many people. Not as many decorations, either. Maddy’d wondered at first why they’d left the rest of the party, but Aimee had appeared to know what she was doing when she’d led Maddy away from the girl who was originally supposed to be her guide.

  Up until then, the house tour had been going great. Walking through the upper floors of the sorority, seeing each room decorated to reflect each girl’s individual style, Maddy had felt at home. She’d had the same feeling earlier, when she’d stepped onto the front porch. Tribal masks had grinned down on her from the white pillars while drums and other jungle noises came from inside the house. Perched on the back of the porch swing, a real parrot squawked “Sigma Safari! Welcome! Welcome!”

  Delia Danforth had greeted her just inside the foyer with an even warmer hello, and Maddy had smiled back with an expression that she hoped told Delia the incident at Amigos was ancient history. They were starting fresh. Following the rules. And Maddy had thought Delia looked like she understood. She’d handed Maddy over to a girl wearing khaki shorts and a pith helmet. “Hi! I’m Megan,” the girl had said, giving Maddy a piece of parchment showing the sorority laid out like an explorer’s map. “Come on upstairs. I’ll give you a house tour.”

  Now, Maddy found herself on the third floor with a new hostess, trying to get back that feeling of belonging.

  “All the rooms are so beautiful up here,” she said. “I love how you can see everybody’s different personalities,”

  “Mm-hm,” said Aimee. And that was it. Megan had been easy to talk to, Aimee not so much. Once they’d gotten away from the crowd she’d sort of clammed up, answering questions and pointing out various features of the house but otherwise not doing much to keep the conversation going. Maddy worried it was her fault because, to be honest, she’d been a little off all day.

  It started at breakfast, when one of the dorm attendants told her she had a package at the front desk. She’d rushed over to find not one but two flower arrangements with her name on them. The first was a vase full of red and white roses. When she read the card, her heart thudded and tears sprang into her eyes.

  I’m sorry I hurt you. Love, Logan

  Maddy had breathed in the scent of the flowers, letting the spark of hope inside her grow just a little bigger. She’d clipped off a bud, kissed it, then put it in her purse to carry for the rest of the day.

  The other arrangement was a basket of daisies with a little teddy bear tied to the handle.

  Hope rush is going well. Miranda

  Maddy’d stuffed that card back into the envelope, then crammed the envelope back into the basket. She’d thanked the guy at the front desk, then she’d taken both arrangements up to her room. She’d put Logan’s bouquet on her windowsill and texted him a thank-you. Miranda’s flowers she’d thrown in the trash.

  “Sigma has the highest combined average GPA of any house on campus, and this house is one of the top five chapters nationally,” said Aimee, up in the study lounge. “We have strict academic standards.”

  She stared at Maddy—tough, like her manager back at Is This Really Yogurt? when Maddy had failed to sell her weekly quota of Yo-Blurties. Okay, Maddy told herself. This was a fair topic. If she wanted to be a Sigma, then she was going to have to prove herself. Except her mind had gone totally blank. What were they talking about again?

  Oh, right. Grades.

  “I graduated with a 3.85 GPA,” she said. “I would have had a 4.0, but I got a B in calculus because of all my extracurriculars.”

  “I see,” said Aimee. “Oh! Here’s someone I want you to meet.”

  Maddy turned and there was Courtney Mann in the doorway, wearing the same cool smile as the day before.

  “We met yesterday,” said Courtney. “I just stopped by to personally welcome you back to Sigma Theta Kappa.”

  “Thanks!” Maddy’s spirits lifted. Courtney had been tough the first time around, but it must be a good sign if she’d made a point to come find her again.

  “So you said yesterday that you were the vice president here,” Maddy said, trying to make conversation. “What are some of your duties?”

  Courtney looked impressed. “Are you interested in leadership at Sigma?”

  “I’m interested in leadership wherever I go.”

  “Well.” Courtney rocked on the heels of her hiking boots. “Vice president is a lot of responsibility. I’m the liaison between the lower offices and the president. The vice president not only has to be able to multitask but also get along with different types of people and help them get along with others.”

  “I’m sure you’re great at that,” Maddy said. “Especially getting nominated for an Integrity award at Future Leaders Intensive. That’s a real tribute to your people skills.”

  Courtney’s eyes flashed. “How did you know I was nominated for Integrity?”

  Maddy gulped. She’d blurted out the first thing that came to her mind. Now she realized that the only way she could have known something like that was from Rachel, and from a story that wasn’t flattering to Courtney at all. She glanced around, hoping somebody else would come into the lounge and take some of the attention off of her, but all of the party noise was coming from the floors below.

  “A girl in my dorm mentioned she went to camp with you,” Maddy finally admitted. “I’m sorry. I hope it’s not against the rules for us to talk about stuff like that.”

  Courtney smiled. “Of course not. Besides, it sounds like you’re making some great new friends and that’s what matters, right?”

  Maddy smiled back, feeling better as a bell rang down in the foyer.

  “We’d better get back downstairs,” said Aimee.

  Courtney walked them both to the landing and then stopped. “Maddy, I’m so glad you came back so we could get to know you better. I hope you have a great rest of the day.”

  “It was good to see you, too,” Maddy said, trying to ignore a creeping sense of letdown. The day before when she’d left Sigma, it had seemed like a perfect fit. Today she wasn’t nearly as confident.

  If she’d ever had any doubts, she knew now for certain: getting into Sigma wasn’t going to be anything close to easy.

  NINETEEN

  “Where is Madeleine Christopher?” Cass tore through the party, poking her head into rooms, breaking into conversations and earning herself some majorly weird looks in the process. But no matter where she searched, she couldn’t find the Christopher girl. She also couldn’t find Courtney, which was almost definitely bad news.

  “Ruby,” Cass grabbed her friend as she passed by. “Have you seen Madeleine Christopher? I think she’s with Aimee but nobody knows where.”

  “I saw them about fifteen minutes ago,” Ruby replied. “They were on their way upstairs.”

  “Crap.” Cass dashed up the staircase to the third floor as the end-of-party bell rang. It didn’t look like anybody was up there—until Aimee and Courtney appeared, escorting Madeleine Christopher out of the study lounge. After a quick handshake on the landing, the three of them glided past Cass down the stairs, none of them giving her so much as a second glance.

  Cass should have known Courtney wouldn’t forget how Violet and Ruby had stood up to her, allowing Madeleine Christopher to get invited back. Courtney never forgot anything. She’d said as much last spring, the night of Cass’s “one-on-one.”

  They’d come for her at 1:00 a.m.—Courtney and two other Killer Bees who were seniors and now long gone. They’d told her to put on shorts and tennis shoes, then meet them in the sorority house parking lot. When Cass did, she was directed into a c
ar, which took the four of them to the track at the old stadium. There, Cass was forced to run laps while the older girls yelled about all of the things they thought were wrong with her. She was fat. Disgusting. She had no self-control and obviously didn’t care what she looked like. As Cass went round and round, she realized what had happened to Ananya. Although she would never know the specifics, the generalities were clear: the Bees discovered whatever would hurt most, and that was what they used against you.

  The more Cass ran and the more the other girls shouted, the angrier she became until finally she’d stopped. Just stopped right there on the track.

  “What are you doing?” Courtney had yelled. “Get moving!”

  Cass did as she was told, but instead of continuing in a circle she started jogging back to the car.

  “Where are you going?” one of the other girls called. “We’re not done here!”

  “I have to get back,” Cass said. “It’s late. I have a French test tomorrow.” She kept to herself what she really wanted to say—that they could screw themselves; that all of this had nothing to do with strengthening the sisterhood. But she didn’t know what else they might do, and she didn’t want to end up like Ananya.

  “I don’t care if it’s late,” Courtney had shot back. “You’ll stay until we’re satisfied that you’re committed to becoming worthy of Sigma.”

  Cass kept her head down, but spoke clearly.

  “I am committed. That’s why I’m concerned about my test. If I get a bad grade because I got no sleep and someone asks why, what should I tell them? The honor code says we’re supposed to be truthful.”

  Silence. Then, the sound of footsteps heading across the parking lot. They’d all piled back into the car without another word. Cass had escaped but had a feeling she wasn’t safe yet. Sure enough, Courtney planted herself in front of the door to the Sigma house, giving her that cold, narrow-eyed glare.