Rescue Me

by Catherine Mann

  She followed the nurse down the hall, even managing to smile at Wyatt as he gave Mike the extra coffee he’d bought from the hospital vending machine. Her conscience stung all the harder. Soon, she promised herself. She would tell him soon. She just needed to figure out how to explain the truth she’d been dodging since the day he proposed.

  She didn’t want to accept his ring.

  * * *

  AJ HEARD THE alarm ring, notifying him that a car waited at the security gate. The digital clock read 11:45 p.m.

  He had roughly the same security system as the ranch. He wasn’t all that trusting of the world. He’d been brought up on his old man’s stories of the latest case, the newest lows of the criminal element.

  The camera view showed Mary Hannah outside, her hand compulsively smoothing back her haphazard ponytail. Her instinctive need for order even when she was fraying at all edges tugged at him. He’d known she was on her way home since Wyatt had called him with an update. Sierra was stable. Lacey and Mike were taking turns sitting with her. Mary Hannah had left as well.

  AJ had half assumed she would go straight to her place, that their encounter would have scared her off. Or that she would want to be alone after the crisis with her friend. But here she was, and more than likely there was only one reason for her to return rather than just call.

  Relief and desire knocked around inside him, more than he would have expected. If they picked up where they’d left off, neither of them could chalk it up to impulsiveness. This would be deliberate. He would have to be prepared to get more involved. No solitary life for him, walled up here in his icy cabin. But the option of turning her away was unthinkable.

  He tapped the code to open the gate.

  Holly tipped her head to the side, curled up on her dog bed. AJ opened the pantry and pulled out a large dog bone. “Be a good girl and just enjoy your chewy treat.”

  He jogged to the door, urgency powering his steps. He hated what had happened to Sierra, and he knew Mary Hannah had to be upset. He was sorry for that but glad she’d come to him for comfort. She didn’t accept help often, so her presence here meant a lot.

  A damn lot.

  The car door slammed outside, and he opened the cabin door with more than a little anticipation. The night air was crisp, the skies clear. Stars were out in full force, winking through tree branches. Mary Hannah made even haphazard wrinkled look chic, her hair scraped into a quick ponytail, her scarf trailing in an uneven drape so unlike her it made him want to kiss away her worries.

  She walked up the steps and straight into his arms. She didn’t hesitate, and he didn’t argue. He just held her close while she drew in ragged breaths. Sierra’s condition in the hospital might be stable, but the crisis was still far from over. The night had taken its toll on Mary Hannah.

  He backed into his cabin without letting go of her. Once inside, he tapped the door closed again with his foot. He cradled her head in his hand and stroked her shoulders. She fit against his chest, felt so right. She inched away for an instant to shrug off her coat. The wool jacket fell to the floor, a totally non–Mary Hannah move to leave anything lying about. He sat in his recliner, pulling her into his lap, just holding her. Her hair felt like silk against his fingers, her soft curves molding to him. The clock on the stove clicked away minutes. Tens. Then dozens.

  Finally, he asked, “Have there been any changes since we spoke last?”

  “None that I know of. They promised to call. Hopefully things have settled for the night at least.”

  “Thank God they weren’t halfway home at some middle-of-nowhere rest stop when this happened.”

  “I hadn’t even thought about that. I just can’t believe this happened. I should have stayed with her, spent more time with her. That baby, that precious premature baby . . . Sierra’s not going to make it the full nine months . . . The doctors are buying days, maybe weeks, but not two months. What if . . .” Her words choked off on a sob.

  He kissed the top of her head. “You can’t think that way. You have to be positive.”

  “I’m trying.” She dragged her wrist under her nose, another gesture so unlike her, relaying the depth of her fears. “But I keep imagining a premie baby and wishing I could have done something to help. If I’d been with her . . .”

  “According to what Wyatt told me, the doctors said it wasn’t the fall. Remember? She fell because her high blood pressure made her dizzy. You couldn’t have prevented that any more than her family who was right there.”

  “Maybe if I wasn’t so preoccupied with things of my own . . .” She looked up at him with such guilt in her eyes, such a weight of unreasonable blame, much like when she’d told him about her sister’s seizures. “Then I would have noticed she was light-headed—or should have noticed it even earlier.”

  “You can’t be responsible for the world, Mary Hannah. You didn’t make a mistake. You didn’t miss a sign. And even if you had, you’re only human.”

  “Believe me, I understand my limitations and flaws all too well.”

  “Are we going to have the firefighter/arsonist discussion again?”

  She shook her head against his chest, the scent of her shampoo teasing his nose. “I’m tired of trying so hard to make wise choices. I’m weary with measuring my every decision.”

  Angling back to look at him, she cupped his face in her hands. She rested her lips on his and held, just held in an intense way that was every bit as powerful as their earlier tangle on the sofa. Then the kiss changed. She changed. She slid her arms around his neck, her lips parting, her body angling closer.

  He tugged lightly on her ponytail until he could look into her eyes. “Mary Hannah, make no mistake, I want you so damn much it’s tearing me up inside. But I have to ask. Are you sure this is the right time? I don’t want to wake up and find you gone again, pretending nothing happened between us. This time I don’t want us to have any regrets.”

  He knew all about regrets and how they could shred a person for far too long. Mary Hannah helped so many and seemed to have no one protecting her.

  “I’m uncertain about a million things in my life, including where you and I are headed tomorrow,” she said with unmistakable honesty. “But I am one hundred percent certain that tonight we need to finish what we started earlier.”

  Doubts vanished. Desire roared up like she’d just poured gasoline on a blaze. The best kind of arson.

  “That’s all I needed to hear.” He took her mouth, fully this time, his hands sliding up the back of her sweater.

  Her satiny skin intoxicated him. Everything about her, actually, sent his senses reeling with the need to be inside her. He was done fighting the attraction. Done resisting. She was soft and perfect in his arms, the scent of peppermint lingering on her tongue.

  He felt like a man awakened from a deep sleep. All of his senses were alive because of her. She’d tapped into something inside him he hadn’t felt in longer than he could remember. With her, he could be real. No walls.

  His decision to move to Tennessee, to close the door on his past, had been the right one. Maybe it hadn’t been a coincidence the first person he’d seen when he arrived in this town had been Mary Hannah. Maybe they’d been meant to be together all along and they’d both been fighting fate. Hell, he didn’t know, but he did believe he could be a different man here. Mary Hannah was all about new beginnings.

  Starting tonight.

  Seventeen

  Paws over my eyes, time for a commercial break—aka a nap.

  —HOLLY

  IF MARY HANNAH had any reservations about sleeping with AJ again, they all vanished. Tonight had shown her quite clearly how fragile life was. She needed to grasp what she wanted where she could, when she could. And right now she wanted AJ.

  She needed the release of being with him. Finally. To finish exploring every inch of his muscled body. Her fingers flew down the buttons o
n his flannel shirt, parting the fabric and exposing the broad expanse of his chest. Her palms soaked up the feel of warm skin and hard planes.

  He held back so much of himself in day-to-day life, but here, in this moment, he gave his all, every bit of his attention focused on kissing her, his tongue stroking, his hands caressing. His erection pressed along her hip as she sat on his lap, and she wriggled to get closer, straddling him, aching for the feel of him against the core of her.

  His growl of approval rumbled from his chest to vibrate along hers. He wrapped his arms around her waist and stood. She locked her legs tighter around him as he walked toward the bedroom, carrying her with him.

  Each step rubbed a delicious temptation against her. The brush of their bodies. The rasp of his late-night beard. The scent of his soap. And most of all the intensity of his cobalt-blue eyes as he saw her. Took her in, flaws and all, yet he wanted her anyway.

  That knowledge spurred desire as surely as his touch.

  He shouldered open the door to his room, a masculine space of dark mahogany and sparse furnishings warmed by a crackling fire in the hearth. She let her legs slide down until her toes touched the floor. The braid rug gave ever so softly against her socked feet.

  Then AJ tugged the hair band free of her ponytail and finger-combed her dark hair around her shoulders. The light glide and tug of the strands through his fingers made her scalp tingle and her nipples tighten. She’d worn her hair shorter for years, only to let it start growing once she finally completed her master’s, determined to start a new life for herself.

  The ordeal at the hospital and all the memories it stirred had left her raw in so many ways. From Sierra to Lacey, talk of pregnancies and babies hit her where she was most vulnerable. God, she didn’t want to think about that.

  She just wanted to let the sensations sweep her away. She focused on the feel of AJ’s hands as he tugged her sweater over her head. Warm air brushed her bared skin a second before his mouth grazed her collarbone. She shoved his flannel shirt aside into the rapidly growing pile of their clothes, followed by jeans, socks. Until with a slow attention to detail he peeled away her bra. His sigh of appreciation whispered over her and drew her breasts to pebbled peaks.

  Her head fell back as she arched into the blissful sensation. Thank goodness his arms banded around her waist or she would have fallen onto the bed.

  Instead, he guided her there, gently stretching her out onto the mattress, kissing his way down her stomach. He captured the low band of her bikini panties in his teeth and let the elastic snap with the lightest tease before he swept off the scrap of satin altogether.

  She arched up onto her elbows. “You’re still a bit overdressed for the occasion.”

  “That I am,” he agreed, standing again to push his boxers down and kick them away. His erection strained thick and hard against his stomach as he reached into the bedside drawer and pulled out a box of condoms.

  Good thing one of them could still think clearly.

  A log rolled in the fireplace, sparks snapping and popping. The hint of smoke in the air was earthy.

  She drew in a breath. “I love the smell of a fire in winter.”

  “The fireplaces are my favorite thing about this cabin. Fireplaces in Atlanta just aren’t the same.”

  Inspiration struck, and she rolled from the bed to stand in front of the stone hearth, the blaze warming the back of her while his steaming gaze heated her front. “Then let’s make love in front of the flames.”

  “Perfect idea.” He tugged the thick comforter from his bed and spread it on the floor, tossing the box of condoms onto a corner of the spread.

  Only a few hours ago, they’d been together in his living room, hoping for just this outcome. She’d fought hard against that attraction for so long, trying to do the right thing. But she couldn’t fight the comfort she found in his touch. Not now.

  Her hands in his, he knelt, bringing her to the floor with him. “We’re finally going to do this.”

  “Yes, we most definitely are.” She leaned back, her hands on his shoulders, bringing him with her.

  The warm bulk of him pressed skin to skin in a sensation like no other. Intimacy. No barriers. He stretched over her, his leg nudged between hers. Her fingers played along his back, his hips, before gliding around to clasp his hard-on. His jaw clenched, his eyes closing as she stroked, cupping the weight of him. They’d been so close to landing in bed earlier. He’d brought her to release on the sofa, but already her body made that climb again. Desire ramped hard and fast, threatening to spill over too soon.

  She writhed with need, her calf hooking around his, anchoring their hips closer, mumbling . . . she didn’t know what.

  “Mary Hannah . . .” He breathed her name against her neck. “I could look at you all night. It’s mesmerizing how the flames cast an amber glow over your skin.” He nipped her bare shoulder. “How they send light and shadows along the curves of your breasts.” He took one dusky peak in his mouth, his tongue flicking and circling.

  She moaned low in her throat, stroking him again, bringing a low growl from his throat.

  “No rushing,” she whispered. “I want this night to last.”

  She needed him to keep the outside world from leaching cold through the walls and into her doubts.

  The future? The past? So much of it was tangled up in the present, especially tonight. The last thing she wanted was to think of another man, especially not her ex.

  AJ pressed another kiss to her lips as if reading her thoughts. “This is just for us. We don’t have to think about the future. We’re here, now.”

  Right now was about being with AJ, throwing aside all baggage and accepting the moment and each other. She vaguely registered his arm stretching to grasp the condoms. Between kisses and strokes she heard the rustling of the box, the tearing of the packet, all sounds bringing them that much closer.

  He went still over her, the room silent other than the crackle of the fireplace and the light howl of the wind outside. She opened her eyes and found him looking at her, waiting. Once their gazes connected, he slowly, so very slowly filled her, taking his time with that first moment they connected on such an intimate level. The frenzy of their kisses and caresses shifted into something far more familiar. This wasn’t impulsive or rushed. This was the two of them. Together.

  A ripple shimmered through her.

  Then he moved again and again, each stroke taking him deeper, inching her farther up the blanket until she hooked her heels to stay with him and wring every ounce of pleasure from the synchronized movements of their bodies. He whispered in her ear, the hot breath of each word telling her how much he wanted her, how long he’d waited for her, dreamed of having her.

  The ways he wanted to take her over and over.

  All that brooding intensity made him a powerful, thorough lover, and she was determined to give back as much as she took. She wanted to imprint herself in his memory in ways she had never imagined before. He made her feel bold and desirable with more than his words. She felt how much he wanted her. Sensed it in the tensing and bunching of his muscles as he struggled to hold back his release until she found hers. Sweat popped along his forehead, their bodies slick against each other in spite of the winter freeze outside. The tendons in his neck stood out, and he said her name in a hoarse voice, raw with desire, “Mary Hannah . . .”

  No one. No one had ever made her feel more wanted than in this moment just by speaking the syllables of her name. Her orgasm built, shattering through her like ice giving way into millions of pieces and letting the wave crash through.

  Her arms locked tighter around him as she held on, feeling his own release rock through him with shudder after shudder. The heavy thud of his heart against her chest echoed her racing pulse. He buried his face in her neck as they both trembled in the aftermath. It was different this time, more intense, because this time they b
oth knew they weren’t walking away. There was a special, deeper connection this time.

  And in the silence of that moment when words floated through her mind like snowflakes that would melt on her tongue if she tried to speak, she knew. This hadn’t just been about sex. There was no going back.

  * * *

  AJ OPENED THE refrigerator and pulled out the leftovers from their supper. Each movement gave him time to gather his thoughts, because sleeping with Mary Hannah again had most definitely knocked him off balance.

  The whole evening was so upside down from what he’d planned and expected. He’d thought they could have an affair. They would work the inescapable attraction out of their system and move on, firefighter and arsonist on different paths.

  Except he couldn’t justify the negative image of her. She’d made a mistake, sure, but she’d done everything right to fix her life and make amends. Her whole existence had become about serving others. He respected that. Which left him in the position of accepting that he wanted to know more about her.

  He wanted to be with her for more than the night.

  But would she want to be with him when she knew everything about him? Even if he worked through the tangled mess of his past, he was still a cop and there would be other missions to mess with his moody mind.

  At the moment, however, the image of Mary Hannah wearing his flannel shirt—only his flannel shirt—wrecked his concentration in an entirely different way. She held a handful of dog treats and worked with Holly on shaking her hand.

  “Paw, Holly, paw,” Mary Hannah said, extending her fingers.

  Holly cocked her head to the side for an instant before flattening to the ground. When all else failed, Holly opted for “down” instead of whatever other command was being given. Mary Hannah laughed softly. “We’ll get there, girl. I know you’re trying.”

  She sat at the table, placing a treat on the floor beside her. AJ had learned that while he couldn’t reward Holly when she didn’t complete the command since that would negate the training, he could find another, easier task to reward her so the session still ended on a positive note. Retrieving the cookie Mary Hannah set on the floor would necessitate Holly coming closer. Getting her trust and even seeking out human contact was an ongoing part of the dog’s conditioning that would need to be reinforced long past the Valentine’s event.