The Demon in Me

by Michelle Rowen

  The very next moment he stormed toward her and knocked the salt out of her hand. It skittered across the kitchen counter. She gasped as he pressed up against her and held her wrists firmly against the counter on either side of the stove.

  “If I wanted to harm you,” he breathed against the side of her face, “I would have already done it. I don’t want you hurt because of me. Ever.”

  Her heart slammed against her chest. “Let me go.”

  He brought her hands up to touch his face. “I’m the same man you knew yesterday. The one you said you trusted. Nothing’s changed.”

  “You’re not a man.”

  But he did feel like one. The rasp of his slight growth of beard, the hard edge of his jaw, his full lips. The silk of his hair slipping through her fingers. His skin against her skin. So real. So human.

  “I’d do anything to prove myself to you.” His mouth was very close to hers and she didn’t turn her head or pull away from him. “What can I do?”

  “Tell me your true name,” she replied without missing a beat. It was a chance for him to be completely truthful with her.

  He tensed. “Eden… you don’t know what you’re asking me.”

  “Sure I do. If I knew your true name I could make you tell me everything. I could make you show me what you really look like when you’re a demon, right?”

  “You could also make me eviscerate someone you didn’t like. Or… juggle. Or sing karaoke. Or throw myself off a cliff. If you knew my true name you could make me your puppet.”

  Karaoke? Normally, that might sound like fun. “But what if I promised not to do any of that?”

  His jaw tensed. “I can’t. I’m sorry.”

  “How does someone find out your true name?”

  He finally let go of her and stepped backward. “They have to be very determined. And very deceitful, and willing to face the consequences when I’m finished doing what they’ve forced me to do.”

  She studied him. “Is that really why Selina tried to destroy you? Because you were pissed off that she summoned you and forced you to make her into a black witch?”

  His expression closed off. “What did she tell you about that specifically?”

  She crossed her arms again. “Not much, actually. She used some sort of a spell to have you give power to her instead of you taking power from her. That was around the same time my head blew up.”

  “I can imagine.” He walked to the other side of the kitchenette, which was only a few feet away, and clutched the side of the laminate countertop over the dishwasher. “Selina received too much power from me on multiple occasions because of that little spell of hers. It nearly destroyed her. She had to learn how to curb it so the black magic didn’t corrupt her soul completely.” He raised his troubled gaze to hers. “So what’s next, Eden?”

  Where were they supposed to go from here? She was torn. He’d admitted that he was a liar, an archdemon, a total nightmarepalooza, and yet she still wasn’t running away from him while screaming her head off. She couldn’t get away even if she wanted to. Evil or not, he was still supernaturally super-glued to her at the moment.

  And there was more than that. A deep sense of wanting to trust him again, despite everything she now knew to be the truth.

  Before she could say anything else, there was a knock on the door and Eden’s shoulders tensed.

  “Expecting somebody?” Darrak asked.

  Eden shook her head. He didn’t look as if he believed her. He walked toward the door and glanced out through the peephole. After a moment, he surprised her by unlocking the door.

  “What is it?” he asked unpleasantly.

  “You’re still here?” It was Ben. A breath caught in her throat.

  “Obviously.”

  “Is Eden in?”

  “She is.” Darrak turned with a frozen smile on his face. “Great timing, by the way. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were psychic.”

  Ben entered the apartment. “I called the office and Andy said you weren’t in yet. I was in the area anyhow, so I thought I’d try my luck and see if you were still at home.”

  “Oh,” she said. “Uh… great. Here I am.”

  He grinned at her. “Somebody let me in the door downstairs so I came right up.”

  There was a long moment of uncomfortable silence.

  “Listen, Darrak,” Ben said. “Do you think I can talk to your sister alone for a moment?”

  Darrak laughed hollowly. “My sister, huh?”

  “That’s right.”

  He cocked his head to the side. “And what would you say if I told you that I’m not really her brother?”

  Eden looked at the demon sharply but his full attention was on the cop.

  Ben frowned. “I’d probably wonder why you would have told me that in the first place. And why you’re staying with her.”

  “That’s very complicated, actually.”

  “Can you go somewhere else so I can talk to her in private?”

  “Afraid not. I need to stay close to her.”

  “You’re very stubborn.”

  “You could say that.” Darrak glanced at her. “Eden?”

  Eden’s stomach churned. She didn’t want to involve Ben in this. “Ben, this isn’t really a good time. Can we talk later?”

  Confusion was plain on the cop’s face. “No, we can’t. I want to know what the hell is going on here. Why did you tell me Darrak’s your brother when he’s not?”

  “She was trying to protect you from the truth, of course,” Darrak said.

  Eden clenched her fists. “Darrak. Stop.”

  “And what truth is that?” Ben’s eyes narrowed on the demon. “That you’re her lover? Her ex? Her overprotective gay roommate? Stop me any time I’m getting close here.”

  “The other night at the restaurant,” Darrak said. “When you stayed to chat with young Malcolm, what did he tell you? I’m curious.”

  “How do you even know about that?” Ben rubbed his temples as if they had started to ache.

  “I know a lot of things.”

  “I guess Eden told you, right? Well, that little deluded freak filled me in a bit more about a group he’s in. Same thing he was yapping about to you, Eden. Something called the Malleus. Says they fight against evil. Demons and witches and evil spirits.”

  “Among other things,” Darrak confirmed.

  Ben eyed him. “Actually, Malcolm gave me a card. Told me to call if I ever wanted to join up. He thought I had potential, can you believe that?” He snorted and his gaze flicked to Eden. “The freak insists that you’re possessed by a demon. That’s why he’s been stalking you. He wants to help. Totally crazy. Just like that serial killer the other day. He said he was possessed, too, didn’t he? What the hell is going on in this city? All of a sudden everyone has the same paranoid delusion?”

  “Why? Don’t you believe in demons?” Darrak asked. “That cross around your neck makes me think you believe in angels. Is it that big of a stretch to think there’s more out there unseen by the average human eye?”

  “Darrak,” Eden warned again.

  He laughed and it wasn’t hard to hear the bitterness there. “Wouldn’t want to corrupt your cop’s pure mind, huh? Keep him nice and squeaky clean. That’s how you like the men in your life, isn’t it? Forgot about that for a moment.”

  Her eyes narrowed. He was baiting her. “Okay, fine. You want to play this game? I’ll do it. I don’t care how crazy it makes me look.”

  “Game on,” he replied dryly.

  She gathered her thoughts as best she could. She hadn’t planned on this but she might as well make it good. “Ben… the other day, that serial killer. When you shot him, the demon he was possessed with left his body and entered mine. I’ve been possessed ever since.”

  Ben stared at her blankly. “What?”

  “Literally possessed. But because I have some sort of psychic ability—the same thing that helped me sense the killer was in that closet in the first place—the demon’
s able to talk to me. He’s also able to leave my body and take human form during the day.”

  “Come on, Eden. This isn’t funny.”

  She clasped her hands together tightly and summoned up the courage to tell him the whole truth. “Darrak’s that demon. That’s why he needs to stay near me. He’s bound to me until I die or I exorcise him.”

  Ben stared at her for a very long time. Then he laughed nervously. “Okay, I get it. This is some kind of joke. Did the guys at the precinct put you up to this?”

  She had to keep trying. It suddenly felt incredibly important for him to believe her. “It’s not a joke. It’s very real. The other day when you saw Malcolm hitting me at Triple-A he and his mother, Rosa, were trying to perform an exorcism. I tried to stop him before you arrived.”

  “And why would you want to stop something like that?”

  Her eyes flicked to Darrak’s.

  “Good question,” Darrak said. “Yes, Eden, why would you want to stop something like that? Share with the class.”

  “I—I didn’t want to hurt him,” she replied. It was the truth, after all. At the time. “He’d convinced me he was a nice demon.”

  She met and held Darrak’s troubled gaze. He didn’t say anything.

  “Okay, let me get this straight.” Ben rubbed his temples. “Darrak here’s a demon. He possessed you. You had a chance to get rid of him and you didn’t because you didn’t want to hurt him because at the time you thought he was… nice?”

  “That’s right.”

  Ben stared at her for a long moment as if waiting for the punch line. When there wasn’t one he shook his head. “I think you’re right. I’m going to go now. Leave you two to whatever twisted fantasy you’re role-playing.” He turned back to the door but Eden was right behind him.

  “Wait, I can prove it.” She couldn’t let him leave like this, thinking she was playing him for some kind of fool. She looked over her shoulder at Darrak, who cocked his head to the side. He had the audacity to look amused at her frenzied explanations.

  So much for a future with Ben. She was kissing her chance at a normal relationship with a nice, normal guy good-bye. At least, this nice, normal guy.

  Ben turned around. “So prove it.”

  “Yeah, Eden,” Darrak said. “Prove it.”

  He didn’t think she could. She wasn’t so sure either, but it was worth a try. If only to wipe that smug look off the demon’s face.

  “I know your true name,” she said. “Selina told me.”

  The smug look was officially history. “No. Eden, don’t do it—”

  “Darrakayiis.” She said it slowly so as to pronounce it perfectly.

  Darrak went rigid, his arms straight at his sides. He looked like a soldier awaiting instruction from his drill sergeant. Everything about him was still except his eyes, which focused on her, pleadingly. Begging her not to say anything else.

  Eden felt surprised by the immediate reaction a few simple syllables had caused. The power of a name. Selina sure hadn’t lied about that.

  “I’m waiting,” Ben said dryly. He hadn’t noticed the change in the room as the power shifted to Eden.

  She nervously approached the unmoving demon, his gaze following her every step. She touched his shoulder and upper arm. It felt like stone, his muscles were so tense. She couldn’t decide if she felt guilty or pleased by having found out something he’d kept a closely guarded secret.

  But now she wanted to find out even more.

  “Show me your demon visage,” Eden said simply and couldn’t help but hear the fear coating every word.

  The very next moment, Darrak burst into flame.

  NINETEEN

  Eden shrieked and leapt back from him. Amber flames coated his entire body, which grew to seven feet tall and broadened to twice his human width. Long, black, curved horns emerged from either side of his now-hairless head and almost touched the ceiling. His eyes were the only thing vaguely recognizable and not covered in the fire.

  She clamped a hand over her mouth to prevent herself from screaming.

  “The hellfire won’t burn you.” His voice was deeper, raspier, and a whole lot more frightening now to match his exterior.

  “It’s really you?” she ventured.

  “You wished to see my demon visage, Eden. Here it is.”

  It took her a moment, but she tentatively stepped closer and couldn’t feel any heat coming from him.

  “How is it possible?” she asked.

  “The fire is part of me—I won’t burn you. I promise.”

  She shakily touched the surface of the golden fire. It felt very warm and dry, as if she was touching sand on a hot beach. It didn’t hurt at all. She forced herself to press closer until she felt his hot skin underneath—now hard and rough to the touch, but solid and real.

  “Get away from her!” Ben yelled from behind. “Don’t hurt her!”

  “Eden, you need to let me go back to my human form,” Darrak said. “Please.”

  “H-how?” she stuttered.

  “Give me permission.”

  She looked up at him, this demon who stood in front of her in all his hellish glory. He looked nothing like the Darrak she’d gotten to know over the last few days. He sounded nothing like him. But it was Darrak. They were the same.

  “Okay, fine. You have my p-permission to return to human form.”

  Immediately the flames extinguished and he returned to his normal size—still over six feet and muscular, but much smaller and less intimidating than as a full demon.

  His handsome face was filled with pain, but she wasn’t sure if it was emotional or physical. “I really didn’t want you to see me like that. I can imagine it was a bit… jarring and terrifying.”

  Her hand still rested on his chest, now clad in his usual black T-shirt.

  “Jarring, yes.” She nodded. “But… surprisingly enough, I wasn’t all that terrified.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “Now you’re the one who’s lying.”

  She shook her head. “No lie.”

  He studied her with disbelief. “Were you drinking heavily this morning when I wasn’t looking?”

  “Maybe that would explain it.”

  “Step the hell away from her now,” Ben growled.

  Eden turned and her breath caught when she saw that Ben, who still stood over by the door, had his gun out and aimed at Darrak. “Ben, no. Put the gun down.”

  “You convinced me that he’s a demon. Funny how seeing is believing.”

  “Ben, it’s okay.”

  “That—that thing almost killed you.”

  “He didn’t. It’s fine.”

  “Fine? No, it’s not fine. Not in any sense of the word.”

  Darrak held his hands out to either side of himself. “I mean Eden no harm.”

  “Shut up.” Ben swore under his breath, his brow was furrowed with stress. He lowered the weapon a little. “He was right. Malcolm—he was right about everything. You’re a demon.”

  Darrak pushed Eden away from him and took a step toward the cop. “Put down the gun before you hurt somebody.”

  “You’re dangerous. I saw it with my own eyes. I need to stop you.”

  Ben raised his gun.

  “No, Ben—” Eden lurched forward to try to stop him before this got out of control, but it was too late. He’d already pulled the trigger.

  Eden gasped as the bullet tore through her chest. It felt as if she’d been hit with a baseball bat. Pain exploded inside of her.

  The force of the bullet made her stagger backward into Darrak’s arms. She gasped for breath, but every inhale felt like a red-hot knife slicing through her lungs. Her vision began to whiten at the edges.

  “Damn it!” Ben moved forward, horror etched on his face. “Eden! Oh, my God. Why did you get in the way?”

  “Stay back!” Darrak hissed at him. “You’ve done enough.”

  She looked up at Darrak’s strained face. He’d placed her gently down on the floor and he pressed his
hands over her wound.

  Her breathing was ragged and it hurt with every inhale. “Darrak… if I d-die… what will you… what will you do?”

  “You’re not going to die.”

  “I’m sorry…”

  His brows knitted together. “For what?”

  “For not trusting you.”

  He actually laughed shallowly at that, but there was no humor in it. “Can’t say I’ve given you much of a reason to up until now.”

  “But… you’re… you’re my… guardian angel… I shouldn’t have forgotten that.”

  “This is no time for insults. Shh, Eden. It’s going to be okay.”

  She touched his hands he held over the wound. She didn’t have much longer. She knew she was going to die.

  Would she see her mom? Caroline Riley had never seemed like somebody who’d want to hang out in Heaven if she was given any choice in the matter. But maybe…

  Suddenly, she felt an unusual warmth where Darrak’s hands were. “What are you d-doing?”

  His jaw was tight, his forehead creased in concentration. “This isn’t a simple cat scratch, but I’ll give it everything I have left.”

  A wave of heat flooded into her chest. For a moment it hurt even more than the gunshot wound itself—a sensation of all her internal organs lighting on fire—and she cried out in pain, but then the pain lessened and she felt her chest begin to tingle as Darrak healed her, mending and knitting her wound.

  His breathing became more erratic and his hands began to shake.

  “Okay,” he said after a minute had passed. “That does it for my reserve of power. And then some.”

  She propped herself up on her elbows and looked down at her chest. There was a large patch of blood on her shirt and she touched it tentatively. There was no pain anymore. Surprisingly, she felt even better than she had before and strangely energized. A quick glance underneath her shirt showed undamaged skin. She looked up at Darrak with wide eyes. He’d healed her.

  But he wasn’t looking at her anymore. He was looking at the cop, and there were now amber flames behind his furious gaze. Before she could say another word, he’d rushed over to Ben and slammed him into the wall. The mirror on one side of the door fell to the floor and shattered.