Dawn and Devilry

by S. Usher Evans

  I nodded. Perhaps, it would be for the best that she be forbidden from seeing me again. I wouldn't have the stomach to tell her I was probably about to die.

  She punched my shoulder. "Okay, what the hell is wrong with you? I tell you I'm off restriction and all you do is nod?" She swallowed. "Do you not like me anymore?"

  I spun, shocked—and even more to see tears in her eyes. "Of course I do, Mora."

  "Then what's wrong?"

  "I…" I warred with myself, whether I should tell her. But if I died, and she thought I didn't care for her, that would be a worse fate. "Alexandra has allowed my induction match to go forward."

  "That's great, though," she said with a hand on my shoulder. "Right? That's what you wanted?"

  "The match, yes," I said. "But she's also given Cyrus permission to kill me if I lose."

  Her hand twitched. "W-what? How? Are you serious? Why the hell would your mother do that?"

  I honestly had no idea. "She's always considered me inferior. Perhaps this is just her way of proving that."

  "You should tell her about the tear." She crawled under my arm, and I held her to my body, feeling better to have her close. "Then she'd shut the hell up."

  "I wish I could," I said, resting my chin on her head. "But I fear if I did, it would cause more trouble. Your mother might not be wrong about the rest of my clan. Alexandra wants to continue what Riley started. It would be reckless to tell her about this world. And besides that, my induction would still go on as planned."

  "This is bullcrap," Mora said, plucking a bottle out of the pack she'd brought and sitting down on the sand. "I just got off restriction and now you're going to die?"

  I had to laugh at her serious face. "You certainly have a way of phrasing things." I joined her on the ground, taking another bottle and allowing her to open it for me. Beer, I could smell it right away. But with one swig, I knew this was yet another thing I'd never really tasted before.

  "I really like you, Gavon," she said after a minute. "You can't die."

  "And I've fallen in love with you."

  Her fear was immediate, or perhaps it was just shock. Her eyes sprang open and her jaw dropped as she slowly turned to me.

  "You…love me?"

  I nodded. "Is that all right?"

  "I mean, it's kind of sudden," she said, her blue eyes wide and uncertain. "We've only known each other a few weeks."

  "Romeo and Juliet only knew each other for a few days."

  She glared. "I'm not doing a suicide pact with you."

  Again, I laughed, but only to keep from thinking about my induction match. "Perhaps you're right. I've never been in love before, so I don't know the rules. But I know that when I see you, my heart feels like it's going to burst. I think about you all the time—about talking with you, seeing new things. Kissing you." I swallowed. "I suppose I thought that's what love was."

  She cupped my cheek and tilted my head to meet her gaze. "Do you really mean all that?"

  "Of course I do," I said. "Why wouldn't I have—"

  She captured my lips, and this time, there was no hesitation. With gentle strength, I crushed her to me. Perhaps I would die—perhaps her mother would be successful in keeping us apart. But for the moment, I had her in my arms, and I intended to take advantage of it.

  There were many benefits to a girl from the modern era. One of them happened to be her knowledge of all things sexual. I was a willing and attentive student, and learned more in those few hours than in my entire life before then. When we'd had our fill of each other, we lay under the stars, content to hear the ocean waves and count the bright lights above.

  "You'll tell me when it's appropriate to love you, right?" I asked, twirling a lock of her hair around my finger

  She chuckled and pressed her hand against my chest. "You said you've never been in love before. Never even had a crush on someone? Like, felt something for them?"

  I thought of Mary in the village. "I told you. Warriors don't get the luxury of love."

  "Why not?"

  "Because this…effort is only supposed to be for procreation," I said.

  She slowly lifted her head. "Dude, you did not just try to—"

  "No, no, of course not," I said with a laugh. "This was…to put it mildly, because I cannot seem to keep my hands off you. Though I suppose if you were with child, Alexandra would be pleased."

  "Not gonna happen. I'm on birth control." She lay back against my chest. "They really want you to start having kids now?"

  I gathered another lock of hair, letting it slip through my fingers. "I believe my fellow apprentice has three children already, but that could be a lie."

  "Ew." She made a noise. "Three kids. I'm not ready for that."

  "To be honest…I'm not either," I said. "It's one of the many reasons I'm grateful I found this world. I feel like here I have a choice. I don't have to be a Warrior and adhere to traditions I don't agree with." I kissed her forehead. "I can lie with the woman I love and ask her to marry me."

  "Gross. I'm seventeen. We just met."

  "Well, I'm eighteen, and I still want to marry you."

  "Gavon, marriage is for old people. Thirty-year-olds. I'm…I mean, maybe one day, but slow your roll."

  "I don't think I can wait twelve years to be with you," I said with a small whine.

  "But you are with me," she said. "Right now, you're here with me."

  I let the sigh loosen from my chest as reality came back to me. "I am. Tonight. But I could die soon."

  "So…is it a foregone conclusion that you're gonna die?" she asked quietly.

  "No, in that I can fight for my life. Yes, in that Cyrus outranks me in magical strength." I told her about the sparring match, and how even though I'd tried, I'd still failed. "Ergo, my death is…all but certain."

  "Bullshit," Mora said, sitting up. "You can defeat him. You gotta just want it bad enough."

  I trailed a line down her bare back. "I do want it badly. I wanted it badly the other day—"

  "No, you kind of wanted it," Mora said. She began dressing herself. "And maybe that's what your mom is trying to get you to see. She wants you to earn the Guildmaster, and she thinks the only way to make you want it is to save your own skin. I mean, Cyrus seems like a total ass—"

  "He is."

  "And didn't you say he's like…a shoo-in for the Guildmaster?" she asked, and I nodded. "Then there you go. I doubt he'd be okay with you just taking over his spot. You gotta earn it. No nepotism and all that."

  Although I only understood about half of what she'd said, she did make a lot of sense. "There are other ways to motivate people."

  "They're barbarians," she said with a shrug. "And I think saving your own ass is a pretty good incentive."

  "I can think of another one," I said with a smile. "Getting to see you again."

  She sighed. "Do you really want to win? Really, truly?"

  I nodded.

  "And you don't think you can beat him magical to magical, right?"

  "No. Even if I were to give it my all, he's had many more months of training," I said. "I would tire quickly matching him blow for blow."

  She pursed her lips. "But what if you tire him out first? Like, make him think you're on the ropes, then knock him out!"

  "On the…ropes?"

  "It's a boxing thing, don't worry about it," she said. "The point is he already thinks he's more powerful than you are. So, what you do is make him expend a lot of energy. Let him think he's beating you up. But you just conserve your energy. Then, when he's tired, you let him have it."

  I scratched my chin. "I suppose that might work, but only if he's stupid enough to fall for it."

  "He sounds like a dick, though," she said. "Somebody who thinks really highly of himself."

  "Oh, yes, he's very selfish. Incredibly full of himself and confident." I considered that for a moment. "In fact, Alexandra thinks too confident at times."

  "See?" She poked me in the chest. "What else could you use?"


  I thought some more. "He's very jealous of my relationship with Alexandra. Not…that we have one, but that she's my mother. It bothers him when she pays attention to me."

  She grinned slyly. "Oh, does he? You can work with that."

  "Can I?"

  "Just be an asshole to him," she said. "Like, remind him how he's just there because he wasn't born to Alexandra. Get in his head, make him make a mistake."

  I allowed myself to think about how I might defeat Cyrus on my own terms. In a battle of wits, he was unarmed, as it were. Quick to reaction and quicker to jealousy, Cyrus outside the sparring ring was an easy opponent. I'd spent my days avoiding confrontation to keep myself away from his petulance. But what if I turned that petulance into an asset?

  I furrowed my brow. "I suppose that might work."

  "I know it'll work," she said. "My sister does it all the time. You should find a book on reverse psychology and read all about it."

  "I doubt the answers I'm looking for are in a book."

  "I'm serious," she said. "Psychology. It's the science of the mind. You can use it against him. Reverse psychology is when you get someone to do something by telling them not to do it."

  A new voice echoed across the beach. "Kind of like when I tell you to stay in the house, and yet here you are, out with a magical man."

  Sixteen

  We jumped at the sound of Mora's mother behind us.

  "Mom, don't freak out—" Mora said, jumping to her feet.

  "Somebody should be freaking out." Irene stood behind us with her arms crossed, the nearby light from the tear giving her an ethereal glow. "Because it seems I didn't impress upon you the dangers of associating with this man."

  "Mom—"

  "Home. Now."

  Mora didn't even have the chance to scream before she disappeared in a cloud of yellow magic. And as soon as she was gone, I lost track of her magic, too. Wherever Irene had sent her, it was far away from here, or behind a potent barrier.

  "You won't find her, so stop looking."

  I scowled, fixing the harshest glare I could on the woman. "Please explain to me why I'm so dangerous. I keep hearing it, but I'm just not understanding."

  "Your very existence is dangerous. Don't think I don't know what your kind have been planning—"

  "Do enlighten me," I snapped. "As no one but myself has any knowledge of the tear or where it is. I've done nothing to warrant this ridiculous vendetta against me. Unless loving your daughter and helping her improve her grades is somehow worthy of all this hate."

  Irene tutted and crossed her arms across her chest. "Then perhaps it's you who's been fooled. My daughter doesn't date men because she likes them. She does it to see how angry I get. If you felt something for her, it was one-sided, I'm sure."

  I licked my lips. I wasn't very experienced in love, but I knew Mora felt something for me. Perhaps her mother was trying to distract me.

  "Such a shame that you speak so poorly of your own child."

  "Lucky for me, she's my child and I can speak of her however I want." She straightened and leveled a stern look in my direction. "Since I cannot seem to control my child using parental magic, I've gone to our clan master. He has used his powers to keep Mora within the protections of our clan. I've also asked for his blessing to permanently bar you from setting foot in our clan ever again."

  I blinked, parsing her words. "Just your clan?"

  "Yes," she scoffed. "Why?"

  "If you're that concerned about my intentions, why not take concrete action against me? Why not engage us in a match…" I nodded, understanding. "You can't, can you?"

  Her nostrils flared. As powerful as she was, I sensed she lacked the ability even to form an attack spell, even though she probably sorely wanted to. That explained her penchant for barrier spells. Those offered some protection, although I could still get through if I wanted to.

  "If you know what's good for you," she said, her face betraying nothing, "you'll stay away from this place. You'll forget about my daughter and leave us out of whatever schemes you're planning."

  "My only scheme seemed to be improving Mora's grades," I said, dully. "As I've said repeatedly."

  Instead of arguing further, she disappeared in a puff of yellow smoke. For a moment, I forgot where I was, and why I was standing on this beach. With a shake of my head, my mind brushed up against Irene's magic, and the barrier spell she'd enacted. It took very little effort to knock it down, freeing my recollection. But Mora's magic was still hidden from me, and as hard as I tried, I couldn't find it.

  She was gone.

  "You look upset, Gavon," Alexandra said the next morning over breakfast. "I'd think you would be happy to know your apprenticeship will soon be over."

  I lifted my gaze to her, unable to wipe the look off my face. I'd spent the night walking the length of Mora's town, searching for her magical signature, but had come up empty. I'd just come back in time to make breakfast once again and have Cyrus take all the credit for it. And now Alexandra was taunting me by asking me to be happy about a match I had no chance of winning?

  "I'm thrilled," I said, tearing off another piece of the bread Mary had made. Even with the fresh crumbs, it tasted like ash in my mouth.

  "Oh, be nice to him, Mistress. It can't be easy to know you're facing the gallows," Cyrus said with a smirk. "I promise I'll make it quick, Gav. Just lie there and let it happen."

  I rose from the table abruptly, in no mood to listen to him or Alexandra. And to her credit, she didn't stop me as I walked out of the house. Perhaps she, like Cyrus, assumed I was merely going to surrender. But my sour mood had nothing to do with my own impending death and everything to do with Mora. I wasn't going to die without seeing her one last time.

  Although I'd canvassed the entire town the night before, the library had been closed (as had everything else), so, with hopeful thoughts, I ascended the stairs into the building. The librarian who'd always interrupted us was at her desk in the front. I hadn't said a word to her before, but perhaps today was as good as any.

  "Hello," I said quietly.

  She raised her gaze from her book, giving me the once over. "Hello. Can I help you?"

  "Um…yes, have you seen…Mora?" I swallowed. "The girl—"

  "That you're always making out with?" She shook her head. "Haven't seen her in a few days. Saw her mom this morning, who told me you were bad news and that I should kick you out if I saw you."

  I frowned. "I'm not bad, just…worried about her. If you see her, can you tell her…"

  Tell her what? That I was sorry? That I would think fondly of her over the next few days before my untimely death at eighteen?

  "Look," the librarian pulled her glasses off her nose, "you seem like a nice kid. I heard you helping her in there when you could keep your hands off her."

  "Thank you?"

  "She did come by this morning, before her mother," the librarian said, coming out from behind her desk. "Irene had asked me not to tell you, but I can tell you care a lot about her. So here, Mora wanted me to give you this book for some reason."

  Managing Difficult People

  I blinked, turning the book over in my hands.

  "Maybe she thinks it might help you with her mother?" The librarian said with a shrug.

  "Thank you," I said with a smile.

  "Good luck." She cast me a look. "I'm a sucker for a good romance."

  I tucked the book under my arm and wandered back to our room, knowing she wouldn't show up, but hoping she might. After at least an hour of staring sadly at the door and envisioning her blonde tresses bouncing as she walked through, finally I slid the book over to me and opened it.

  There, I found a folded up, handwritten note.

  Gav,

  My mom's forbidden me from leaving the house, so I hope this note gets to you at the library before she catches me. Mom compelled Jeanie to tell her what I'd been up to, so I can't blame the little twerp for ratting me out. But now Mom's gone to Ashley to petition for your p
ermanent banishment. Ashley's agreed to meet with me sometime this week, so maybe he'll reconsider. I think I might have a case since he's not insane like my mom is.

  I don't know if you're reading this before or after your induction match, but if it's before, I hope you kick that guy's ass. I asked the librarian to give me some books for dealing with difficult people. I don't know if it'll help you, but I still think this guy is an insecure little prick and you could trip him up. You're probably twenty times smarter than he is. Use that, too.

  I want to see you again. Please don't die.

  Love, Mora

  PS: You can't die, because the fountain in Rome said we'd be coming back.

  I barked a laugh as her voice filled my mind. And while I was heartened at the thought of her searching for books to help me in my induction match, the one she'd chosen didn't seem very helpful. I was hopelessly lost within the first few pages. She'd left scraps of paper marking several chapters, all on the narcissist.

  The narcissist, named after the Greek myth of the man who fell in love with his own reflection, is a person with an overinflated sense of self. They may use demeaning comments, attention-seeking behavior, and obsess about fantasies of them being successful. A narcissist most often uses their bravado to overcompensate for a lack of something in their lives, usually parental affection.

  That certainly sounded like Cyrus.

  The narcissist relies on others to provide them with attention and self-worth. They may consider themselves invincible, either ignoring real issues or convincing themselves they can't be hurt by anything. Criticism may be taken out of context, and should be avoided. Some narcissists earn pleasure from watching others suffer, so try to keep your comments positive and your appearance unruffled.