Second Chances

by Phelps, K. L.

  He wanted his Paige back, had wanted it more than he had ever wanted anything in his life. However, if this wasn't his Paige then he did not want to wreck her life. He thought of her as his Paige, for the most part believed her to be his Paige, but still there were so many questions. More then anything he wanted for this to all be over. He saw the pain and anguish she was going through and it hurt him, hurt him tremendously knowing he was the source of it all.

  Did that even make sense? No, he doubted it did, but then his thinking hadn't been exactly crystal clear these last couple of days. He wanted it this way. He wanted it that way.

  Can't have it both ways, Buckeroo.

  And he knew that was true. He also knew if he could have it any way he wanted it, then none of this would have ever happened. Paige would never have...have what? Died? Faked her own death? Had her death faked?

  Yeah, well if wishes were trees then you'd be living in one hell of a forest.

  Again it was the blast of a horn that pulled him back to reality. For a moment he looked and actually saw the cab driver again, but it wasn't the cabbie. He was long gone, Nathan's money in his pocket. This horn belonged to a silver Toyota Camry. The man behind the wheel waved his hand at Nathan, who got the message loud and clear. Get the hell out of the road you nut!

  Nathan stepped back up onto the sidewalk, not remembering ever having stepped off it. He turned back toward the restaurant and saw Paige was looking at him. He did his best to act natural and smiled. She returned it, but there was an unquestionable look of puzzlement in her eyes. Even at this distance it was unmistakable. It was a look she had given him many times in the past.

  Well someone that looked like her had given you that look before.

  "Aw, shut up," he muttered to himself as he started after her.

  "Yeah? Well screw you too buddy. Next time I'll just run you over," the man from the Camry yelled out his window at Nathan, who didn't even try to explain he hadn't been talking to him.

  He sighed and moved to join Paige. He glanced briefly at the woman on the patio, but not long enough to draw her attention. Not that he thought he could. She was still sitting there alone, her gaze locked on Paige. Nathan had a sickening feeling he knew exactly who she was waiting for. And if he was right, then this meeting was only going to leave him with even more questions.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  "Yes, your party is waiting for you," the hostess told them. "Right this way."

  Nathan did not realize that a single person constituted a party, but he wasn't about to argue. He walked beside Paige, following the hostess as she led them through the restaurant. His stomach turned as he saw where they were being lead. He'd known the patio was where they would end up, just as he knew who the rest of their party was, yet he'd still been holding out hope that he'd been wrong.

  He kept his eyes in constant motion as they walked. Paige. The restaurant patrons. Paige. The door to the patio. Back to Paige. He could see just how nervous she was, though he doubted anyone else could.

  They emerged out onto the patio and instantly he sought out the woman in the red pantsuit. He stole a quick glance at Paige and then his attention snapped back on the woman. She appeared to be a few years older than Paige, though exactly how much older Nathan was not sure. He'd never been good at estimating ages, especially in the age of plastic surgery, not to mention the magic some women seemed to be able to perform with makeup. However neither surgery nor makeup could change the fact that they weren't the same age and something about that gnawed at Nathan and he filed it away in the back of his mind. She was an attractive woman, not overly thin, but by no means chunky.

  She saw them approaching, had been watching for them for the last few minutes. She began to rise. Nathan made himself take his eyes off the woman and swing his attention back to Paige. His stomach did another backflip.

  "Paige!"

  The excitement in her voice ran down his spine, chilling him. He kept his eyes on Paige.

  "Linda," she called back, a smile blooming on her face.

  The hostess stepped aside and let Paige rush by her. She nodded to Nathan as if to say well I guess you can find your way from here, then turned and left.

  He hadn't even realized he'd stopped until Paige turned towards him, a huge smile on her face, and waved for him to hurry over. Reluctantly and by no means in a hurry, he joined them.

  "Nathan, I would like you to meet my best friend from college. Linda, this is Nathan."

  Linda smiled at him, nice and big. It was too well practiced to be genuine. It was a politician's smile.

  Nathan reached out and shook her hand.

  "Hello, best friend from college."

  She gave an easy, gentle laugh. That too sounded long practiced. She was meeting him for the first time, a total stranger who she'd only learned about in the last day. A stranger who had caused her friend to blow her off at the airport and perhaps had placed the job she'd arranged in jeopardy, yet Linda's reaction seemed to indicate that this was the most natural occurrence in the world. Nathan had been right, he instantly disliked her.

  "So," she began with that too easy smile of hers. "If I'm best friend from college, what does that make you?" She laughed as soon as the words were out of her mouth, much too quickly. A nervous laugh this time.

  Paige didn't seem to notice and laughed along with her, though hers at least sounded somewhat genuine.

  Linda smiled at Nathan, trying to put him at ease. He saw no smile in her eyes to match the one on her lips, which to him appeared a bit smug. To Nathan it appeared as if she were saying, Sure I am making a joke here, but what is your deal? Just who the hell are you? I'm not going to wait this out. No mindless chit-chat. Let's just cut to the chase and put our cards on the table right now. Certainly Paige will see this as simple banter, but you and I know differently. Don't we?

  "We sure do," he murmured to himself.

  "What was that?"

  Nathan smiled back at her. He doubted his was as convincing as hers, but he did his best.

  "Let's just say," he began as he held a chair for Paige. "That I am her best friend from the airport."

  Paige laughed, a mixture of genuine amusement and nervousness.

  "Oh really? Well, well, well. Paige that is just so unlike you."

  "Yes, she assured me of that numerous times."

  "Though I will say that you still have excellent taste, Paige."

  Nathan muttered a thanks at the compliment. He knew she was trying to put him at ease. She could no doubt see that he was a bit on edge, but she likely attributed that only to the suddenness of having to meet an old friend of Paige's.

  "Yeah. Things have been kind of wild lately. I've hardly been myself," Paige said.

  They had discussed it and had agreed to keep the real details of the last day to themselves, but still until just now Nathan had been unsure of just how Paige would play it. He was thankful that she hadn't decided to just unload the entire story on Linda. He hadn't truly thought she would, but the possibility had danced through his mind more then once.

  Oh hey Linda, this is Nathan. He happens to think I am his dead wife. Pretty crazy don't you think?

  "So best friend from college, eh?"

  "Yeah, and if she had doubled up or taken a few summer courses she could have graduated early like me."

  "Really? You didn't mention that."

  Paige offered him a cockeyed smile.

  "I don't think we actually talked much about your college days at all. When did you two meet?"

  Paige opened her mouth and then closed it, a puzzled look crossing her face. She bit down on her lower lip.

  "Just after orientation," Linda piped in. "I missed it. Paige was just coming out of Jones Hall and I almost ran right into her. She had her head down reading her orientation packet. Can you believe that? Actually reading that crap they give out. I knew right then that this girl needed someone to teach her how to loosen up."

  Nathan had his eyes locked on Paige. She
was focused on Linda, her head tilted a little to the left. She wasn't so much looking at Linda, as she was looking past her. Looking through her. A smile began to form on her face.

  "I wasn't that bad," Paige insisted.

  "The hell you weren't."

  "So she..."

  Nathan stopped as a shadow fell over him. They turned their attention to a smiling waiter. He handed them all menus and introduced himself as Oliver, then inquired if they'd like to place a drink order. Paige asked for a Diet Coke, as did Nathan. Linda went with a vodka tonic.

  Paige opened the menu before her.

  "Anything you guys want, I'm treating. Well the company is anyway," Linda said with a mischievous smile.

  "What company would that be?"

  For the briefest of moments, Nathan was certain he saw a look of pure terror on her face. A deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming semi. But it was only there an instant and when she smiled at him, Nathan wondered if he'd just imagined it all.

  "Blood sucking lawyers of course. Johnson, Barnes and Block."

  Nathan laughed politely.

  "Well since you, well your bosses anyway, are buying, why don't you order for the three of us. I'll eat anything Italian and I am sure you know what Paige likes."

  While her lips continued to smile, her eyes threw daggers at him. She did not like him, not one single bit. She didn't know what his game was, but she could tell he was pushing her. And pushing her hard. Not only had he almost messed up her vacation plans and gotten her in trouble with Kassar, now he was pushing her. Sure, Kassar could push her around. She had long ago come to accept that, found it a little thrilling actually. But no way was she going to let this bastard get away with it.

  He glanced at Paige. She continued to smile and to anyone else it might appear that she was oblivious to the dance he and Linda were engaged in, but Nathan could tell she was picking up on the tension. And she didn't like it.

  Linda lifted the menu up so it blocked her from Nathan's view. She mouthed the venom she was dying to spit across the table at him.

  He wondered why he was being so hostile. Why was he pushing? He could tell that Paige was aware of his tension, but so could Linda. Was the tension and anger misplaced, misdirected? Was he so scared of what Linda represented? Was his mind just trying to invent something that wasn't there? Was he so terrified of losing Paige again that he was certain this woman was his enemy, certain that she was trying to deceive him?

  Yes, he had to admit that was definitely a possibility. And yet he was certain there was more to it. He definitely feared losing Paige, but that was not the only reason he did not trust this woman. He couldn't put into words just what he was feeling, but raw hostility was definitely part of it. He felt a sincere desire to leap across the table and strike her. He was shocked at these feelings, but he couldn't deny they existed. He had been in a scuffle or two growing up, but nothing he would have ever considered a real fight and he certainly had never even entertained the notion of hitting a woman. And yet here he was, contemplating that very action.

  "I am quite certain that Paige would rather make her own decisions. When it comes to Italian, Mr. ...ummm?"

  "Just Nathan, please."

  "Well, Nathan, when it comes to Italian, Paige can be quite picky. Isn't that right?"

  Nathan waited for a moment, certain that a contradiction was coming. When Paige said nothing, Nathan merely nodded.

  Linda smiled at him over the top of her menu. Paige's silence was a small victory for her and they both knew it. He refused to meet her eyes.

  "I would however be more than happy to order for you, if you'd like."

  He tried not to flinch at her words. He nodded, surrendering for the moment. He did not have any appetite so it didn't really matter what she ordered for him.

  "I am so happy to see you," Paige said reaching over to give her friend's hand a squeeze.

  "Ditto. It hasn't been the same without you. I was getting to the point where I almost missed school. Almost."

  Paige laughed and Linda joined in. Their laughter seemed to mock him. He looked down at the menu. He felt foolish now. These two certainly knew each other. What the heck had he been thinking? Doubts began to swirl in his mind. Was she his Paige?

  What the hell are you thinking? Of course she is. How could she not be? How could they both have the same histories? How? Am I losing my mind? Is this what it feels like to go crazy? Is this what madness feels like?

  Nathan opened his mouth to answer the questions bouncing around inside his head, but stopped when he realized how it would look.

  "Nathan?"

  He looked over at Paige and cocked an eyebrow. "Yes?"

  "Umm...were you...well you looked like you were about to say something."

  "Oh," he stammered, his mind racing. "I, uh, well seeing you two together and you saying how happy you are to see each other, I was just wondering what your favorite memory from college was."

  Linda almost laughed at his rambling. She didn't know exactly what he had been thinking or had been about to say, but it was quite obvious that whatever it was, wasn't the near incoherent question he'd posed.

  "Well, let's see," Paige began.

  He felt like such an idiot. He kept his eyes down on his menu, feeling completely foolish for...well for everything. He was completely ashamed at his earlier actions. Why had he instantly disliked Linda? Simply because she was obviously a bit leery of him? Why shouldn't she be? He was a perfect stranger after all. A stranger who'd interrupted her and her friend's plans. For all she knew he could be a raving psychopath. He couldn't blame the woman for being suspicious of him.

  He looked up at Linda and tried to give her a genuine smile. He felt like a jerk and was ready to ask her to forgive him, which might confuse Paige, but he was certain Linda would completely understand. Even if she wouldn't accept his apology. But Linda wasn't looking at him, her eyes were locked on Paige.

  Paige was looking back at Linda. No, that wasn't quite right. Once again she was looking towards Linda, but not really at her. Once more looking through her, beyond her. She was chewing her lower lip again. He let his eyes linger on her for a moment before they flickered back to Linda.

  Linda brushed a hand through her hair, a small trickle of sweat ran down the side of her forehead.

  "Well I remember mine," she chirped.

  "What was it?" Paige asked, a definite edge to her voice.

  He studied her. What was that tone in her voice? It almost sounded like she was desperate to know what Linda's thoughts were. Almost sounded like she was on the edge of panic.

  "Dean's list reception, second year. You wore that lovely red dress. I had that yellow backless number. Sarah had more than a little too much to drink. Remember? We had to sneak her past Sister Grimes. Lord, she was so strict. She'd have killed Sarah if she'd found out how drunk she was. Remember?"

  Paige smiled, laughed and nodded.

  "Sarah and Sister Grimes. Oh yeah, that was too funny. Sarah was so drunk that night."

  "I can still hear her puking in the bushes," Linda said with a laugh.

  Paige nodded.

  "And Sister Grimes, she was so strict. She'd have killed Sarah.

  Nathan frowned.

  Linda smiled over at him as Paige again laughed at the memory of how drunk her friend had been. Another point for me, her smile said.

  His desire to hit her was back.

  "Sounds like a good time," he managed to say.

  "Great time," Linda agreed.

  "Great," Paige echoed.

  "Bet that would have made a great blackmail picture."

  "No doubt," Linda said.

  He wasn't sure what made him say that and was even less sure about what he said next.

  "It's a shame Paige lost everything in the fire. After hearing her talk about college I was hoping to see a picture or two. Unfortunately she lost everything."

  "Yeah the fire," Linda started. "How awful. I was so sorry to hear about that."<
br />
  She didn't sound all that sorry to Nathan.

  "I'm just glad no one got hurt," Paige insisted.

  "I don't suppose you have any pictures," he said, looking directly at Linda.

  "Me?"

  Nathan nodded.

  "Of course I do. Hundreds. Unfortunately most are still packed away with all my college stuff. I've only been out here half a year and my place is so small I haven't had most of my stuff sent out to me yet."

  "That's a shame."

  Linda looked over at him, her eyes once again shooting daggers at him, but the smile on her face was unmistakable and he was quite certain of what was to come next.

  "Oh, wait. You know what?" She lifted her purse, opened it, and rifled through it for a moment. "No. I guess not."

  Nathan was impressed by her show, but not surprised by the ending.

  "No, wait, yes here it is. I have one."

  Linda triumphantly plucked a worn photograph from her purse. Surely the cat who swallowed the canary would have been envious of the smile upon her lips. She passed the photograph to Paige.

  Game, set, match you son of a bitch. I don't know what the hell your deal is or what game you are playing, but either way I am the winner here, not you.

  "Sorry to keep you waiting so long," Oliver said as he set the glasses down on the table. "A little backed up at the bar I am afraid. Have you decided what you'd like or would you like a few more minutes?"

  Linda sipped her vodka tonic and winked at Nathan. "I think I am ready to order."

  Linda and Paige ordered manicotti while Nathan opted for grilled chicken. When Oliver had left, Paige returned her attention to the picture. A huge smile played on her lips.

  "Right outside the library," Linda said.

  Paige nodded and then handed Nathan the photograph. His heart sank. It was Paige and Linda. They stood close to each other in front of a large stone building, a massive tree off to their left decked out in the full pageantry of a New England Autumn. He stared at the photo. Paige's smile melting him, while Linda's mocked him.