Dreamless

by Josephine Angelini

Before anyone could recover from the shock of witnessing the paralyzing presence of the Moirai, somehow Lucas appeared at his sister’s side, already gently lifting her up off the floor and into his arms.

  “When did you come in?” Ariadne asked him, looking over her shoulder at the door, and then back at Lucas with wide eyes. He didn’t bother to respond. His focus stayed entirely on his little sister.

  Cassandra’s eyes fluttered open and her head twitched as she regained consciousness. Lucas steadied her as she flailed slightly with the shock of coming around to find herself being held up in the air. He smiled at her and she smiled back, neither of them needing to talk to be able to communicate. Helen would have given everything she had to see Lucas smile at her like that. His face was so beautiful when he smiled. She wanted to touch it.

  Lucas brushed past Matt as he carried Cassandra out of the library, and as he did so, Helen noticed that he made no sound as he walked. Somehow over the past few weeks Lucas had learned how to use his ability to manipulate the air to create a soundless vacuum. It was almost like he wasn’t really there anymore. Helen’s heart squeezed so tightly in her chest that she thought for a minute that she would choke. Lucas was erasing himself, and he was probably doing it so he didn’t have to suffer actually being in the same room as her. He hated her that much.

  Claire told everyone that they couldn’t safely read the scrolls without a proper initiation first. They’d have to wait until Cassandra was able to perform the ritual. Everyone else filed out silently, engrossed in thought, but Helen stayed behind in the library for a few seconds in order to collect herself.

  Every time she saw Lucas it got worse. He was changing, but not for the better. Something wrong was happening to Lucas.

  Blinking her stinging eyes, Helen scolded herself. She didn’t have the right to worry about him anymore. She wasn’t his girlfriend. She wasn’t even supposed to look at him.

  Helen defiantly shook off the thought before it could suck her in. She had to keep busy. Motion. Action. That was the key.

  As Helen walked out of the library, she came across Claire and Jason sitting on one of the many back staircases in the sprawling Delos house. From what Helen could gather, they had already worked past the angry phase of their argument and were moving steadily to an understanding. They held hands as they talked. Claire sat on a slightly higher step to compensate for her small stature, and both of them were leaning toward each other so close it was like they were trying to climb into each other’s eyes.

  Helen ducked out the back door before she had to witness any more of the emotional exchange. There were some clacking and huffing sounds coming from the tennis-courts-turned-arena, and she wandered toward it, wondering who was training. Her first thought was that Castor and Pallas were working out together, but when she went inside she saw Ariadne and Matt going at it like a couple of gladiators with wooden practice swords. Matt fell back on his ass, and Helen cringed for him. She knew exactly what he was going through.

  “Good, Matt,” Ariadne said as she bent over to lend him a hand. “But you’re still dropping your guard too much when you . . .” Ariadne trailed off when she saw Helen was watching her.

  “I didn’t know you were teaching Matt to fight,” Helen said awkwardly when she realized that the two of them were blushing. They shot each other nervous glances and then looked back at Helen with cornered looks on their faces.

  “Guys? What’s going on?” Helen finally asked when she couldn’t figure out why they were acting so guilty.

  “My dad doesn’t want mortals involved in any of the fighting,” Ariadne admitted. “He sort of forbade us to teach Matt how to use a sword.”

  “Then why are you doing it?” Helen asked, but neither of them answered her. Helen tried to picture Matt fighting someone like Creon, and the image truly frightened her. She had to say something. “Matt, I know you’re a good athlete, but even with training it would be suicide for you to take on a Scion.”

  “I know that!” he said in a strangled voice. “But what am I supposed to do if I get caught in the middle of a brawl or hit one of you with my car again? Just stand around and wait for someone to come rescue me? I’d be dead if I did that. At least this gives me something of a shot.”

  “Scions don’t usually attack mortals. No offense, but we think it’s dishonorable,” Helen responded sheepishly. She didn’t want to put Matt down, but it was the truth.

  “Matt doesn’t have to be attacked to end up getting hurt. Or killed,” Ariadne said in a wavering voice.

  “I know he doesn’t, but . . .” Helen began gently and then broke off. She couldn’t help but think that after a few weeks of training Matt might start believing he could handle himself against one of the Hundred, which was madness. “This is a really bad idea, you guys.”

  “I can’t just stand around and do nothing! I’m not afraid!” Matt yelled at her. Ariadne stepped forward and touched Matt’s arm to calm him down.

  “You’re not helping,” she said gently to him before she turned to Helen with a steely look in her eyes. “I don’t think it’s right for him to be around Scions and not even know how to hold a sword. I honestly don’t care if no one else in this family agrees with me. I’m going to teach him. So now the only question is, are you going to tell my father or not?”

  “Of course I won’t!” Helen said in an exasperated voice before she turned to Matt to plead with him. “Just, Matt, please don’t try to fight a Scion unless you absolutely have to do it to defend yourself!”

  “Right,” he responded with a bitter tilt to his lips. “You know, I may not be able to lift a car over my head, but that doesn’t mean I’m useless.”

  Helen couldn’t remember Matt ever being so bitter about anything. She tried to explain what she meant, but got strangely tongue-tied. Honestly, she wished he were a little more cowardly. He’d probably live longer that way, but she couldn’t very well say that to him.

  When Helen didn’t respond right away, Matt left the arena with Ariadne following close behind. As they got a few paces out of the enclosed area, Helen heard Ariadne saying something conciliatory, and Matt cutting her off in frustration. They continued talking as they moved away, but Helen didn’t even try to eavesdrop. She was just too damn tired.

  Helen sat down on the sand with her head in her hands. There wasn’t one person she could turn to, even just to chat for a few minutes before she had to face her seemingly impossible task in the Underworld.

  The sun started to set. Another day was ending, and another night in the Underworld awaited her. Helen lifted her head and attempted to find the energy to fly home, but she was so wrung out she could barely focus her eyes. If she stayed there any longer, she would fall asleep, and she didn’t want to descend while she was in the Deloses’ backyard.

  She hauled herself to her feet, and as she did, she felt that strange vertigo again. It was as if a part of the world broke off and turned into a picture while her body moved around it. Helen fell back down onto a knee and tried not to vomit. She saw the sand swim in front of her eyes, and for a moment, she thought she saw it actually move. She held very still and closed her eyes.

  She could hear a heartbeat. And it wasn’t hers.

  “Who’s there?” she whispered, her eyes darting all over the place. She summoned a globe of electricity and held it in the palm of her hand. “Come any closer, and I will kill you.”

  Helen waited a few more moments, but there was no response. In fact, there was nothing but perfectly still air. It was actually quite peaceful. Flexing her hand, she allowed the electricity to dissipate, and a shower of sparks fell between her fingers and bounced harmlessly on the sand. She shook her head and laughed at herself, unable to stop a note of hysteria from creeping in. She was cracking up and she knew it.

  When Helen got home she started cooking dinner for herself and her dad, but halfway through she got a call from Jerry. Helen could tell from the stiff tone of his voice that he really wanted to yell at her for breaki
ng her bedroom window, but since he was calling to tell her that there was a terrible mix-up involving a shipment of spider-shaped balloons at the store and he would be leaving her alone another night, he felt guilty enough to let the whole window thing go. Helen tried not to sound too sullen when she told him she was sorry he had to work late, then she hung up and stared at the half-prepared meal that she no longer felt like finishing or eating. She repackaged what she could and ate a bowl of cereal standing up by the kitchen sink before she went up to get ready for bed.

  Throwing Orion’s jacket over her shoulders, Helen opened her bedroom door. She was about to step inside but her feet stopped where they were. Her bedroom used to be her sanctuary, her place of retreat, but it wasn’t anymore. It was a place where she suffered every single night. And on top of that, it was Eskimo cold. Standing on the threshold, Helen took a deep breath and then let it go, sending a big cloud of steam out in front of her as she did so.

  “Well, Orion whatever-your-last-name-is,” she said to her empty room as she stepped inside, shut the door, and slipped her feet into a pair of rubber boots. “I hope you were serious about wanting to help me, because I’ve never needed help more than I do right now.”

  Of course, Orion didn’t show. Helen spent what felt like a day’s worth of time wandering around the periphery of the Fields of Asphodel. She paced through the slippery mud of the flats around that meadow of creepy flowers, hoping he would appear at any moment, but he never did.

  Helen didn’t go into the Fields because the flowers depressed her. Asphodels were pale, scentless blossoms that stuck up out of the ground, stiff and evenly spaced, like gravestones. She had read that asphodel flowers were the only nourishment for the hungry ghosts in the Underworld, and although Helen had yet to see any ghosts, she could feel them all around her, sense their eyes in the still air.

  She’d focused on Orion before she went to sleep, hoping that by doing so she would appear next to him. She didn’t have the Underworld figured out by any stretch of the imagination, but she knew enough to know she would only see him if he had descended into the Underworld the same night. She paced back and forth, hoping he would appear, but she sensed that if she didn’t appear in front of him when she descended she wouldn’t see him, even if she waited forever.

  And the more she thought about it, the more Helen had to admit that she wasn’t sure Orion would join her the next night, either. Maybe he’d decided that he’d had enough of the Underworld altogether.

  She tried to look on the bright side. At least he’d given her the tip about dressing better before she went to sleep, and although it would be impossible to explain to Jerry why she was wearing a pair of galoshes to bed, it was still better than walking barefoot through all that nasty mud.

  On Monday morning, Helen awoke and sighed, saddened by the fact that she would have nothing to look forward to when she went to sleep that night. She reminded herself that Orion had never been a part of the bargain. She’d always thought she would have to do this alone. Reluctantly, she hauled herself out of bed to clean up the night’s mess and get ready for school.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Sleep well? read the text from the unknown number. Helen plowed into Claire’s back and practically knocked her down.

  “What the hell, Lennie!” Claire complained loudly. Helen reeled off to the side and tried to regain her footing without stepping all over her tiny friend.

  “Sorry, Gig . . .” Helen mumbled distractedly while she typed: Who is this?

  “Who are you texting?” Claire asked curiously.

  4-get me already? I’m 4-lorn, read the reply. Clever, Helen thought. So clever she decided to take a chance.

  4-lorn? B-cuz you have 4 last names? Helen asked back, a faint smile creeping up her face and an oddly large butterfly flapping away in her tummy.

  “Lennie? What’s going on?” Claire took Helen’s upper arm and pulled her along the corridor toward lunch.

  “I think this might be that Orion guy—the guy I met in the Underworld. I just don’t know how. I never gave him my number,” Helen mumbled.

  Claire steered Helen safely through the cafeteria while Helen stared with single-minded determination at the screen on her phone. If this was a trick, Helen knew she could possibly be outing Orion, but she had to test her mystery texter and find out for sure. If some unknown person had her number, it might not be safe for her, either. Finally, a reply came.

  Ha! 4 names, but only 1 coat. Freezing! Meet me 2-night? Orion wrote, and now Helen was certain that it was Orion on the other end of the thread. No one else could possibly know about the coat she had accidentally stolen from him, and then slept in since, except Orion. Helen hadn’t even had a chance to tell Claire about it.

  4-sure. 2-night. I won’t ditch you, at least, she replied. She realized that last line was snotty as she sent it, and desperately wished she could snatch it out of the air before it reached him. Helen had waited for hours. It wasn’t that she considered meeting Orion a date. It was just that it was the first time she’d ever been expecting a boy who didn’t show. It hadn’t felt great.

  Hey, no fair. Couldn’t go to the caves last night. Exam today came Orion’s delayed reply.

  Caves? Helen wondered. She was a little more relieved than she should have been that he had such a good excuse, but rather than stop and examine why, she decided to stick to the most important things first. Like how Orion had found her.

  How’d you get my #? Helen wrote while Claire pushed her down into her usual seat and started unpacking Helen’s lunch for her.

  Daphne.

  What! When? Helen’s thumbs were pressing down so hard she had to remind herself to ease up before she snapped her phone in half.

  Uh . . . 5 minutes ago? Got 2 go.

  Did you TALK to her?

  Helen waited, staring at the screen with her mouth hanging open, but when she didn’t get an immediate response she knew the conversation was over.

  “So. Orion, huh?” Claire said through pursed lips. “You didn’t tell me you’d gotten his name.”

  “Well, you never asked about him again.”

  “Sorry,” Claire said, knowing she messed that one up. “I was preoccupied—dodging Cassandra and Jason, looking for that scroll. So what happened?”

  “We talked.” Helen took a distracted bite out of the sandwich that Claire had put in her hand.

  She had a dozen questions to ask Orion, but she knew that she would have to wait until that night to get any answers. The first question she was going to ask him was why Daphne would take his calls and not hers. Orion had said that he’d known Daphne his whole life. Maybe the two of them were really close. Closer than Daphne was to her own daughter? Helen had no idea how she felt about that.

  “Are you going to tell me about this Orion guy or am I just supposed to sit here and watch you chew?” Claire asked with raised eyebrows. “And why are you so grouchy?”

  “I’m not grouchy!”

  “Then why are you scowling?”

  “I just don’t know what to think about all this!”

  “All what?” Claire nearly shouted with frustration.

  Again, Helen was confronted with the fact that there was a lot that she and Claire didn’t share with each other anymore.

  Speaking as quickly and as quietly as she could so she could get the whole story in before the end of lunch, Helen told Claire all about how he had tried to pull her out of quicksand the first time. Then she described the gold branch on Orion’s arm, the fact that twice now he’d seemed to be fending off some kind of attack from hellish monsters when she had never seen anything like that down there, and how he had protected her during one of those attacks.

  “I don’t want you to tell Jason about this just yet, okay? Because apart from texting just now, I’ve only spoken to Orion once, so I don’t know what to think about him. He said Daphne sent him down there to help me,” Helen said with a confused shake of her head. “And honestly, Gig, I don’t know what she
’s up to. I feel like she’s always scheming.”

  “That doesn’t mean Orion is. You don’t have your powers in the Underworld, right?” Claire asked with shrewd eyes. “And he’s a good fighter?”

  “He’s an amazing fighter, and from what I’ve seen, he doesn’t need extra powers to take care of himself. He killed the thing that was on top of me with his bare hands, practically.”

  “Then maybe Daphne’s only scheme is to try to keep you alive. The first time you two met, he did save you,” Claire said with an indulgent smile.

  Helen wanted to argue but, as always, Claire had a really good point. Daphne wanted to get rid of the Furies and, according to Cassandra, Helen was the only one who could do it. On top of that, Helen was Daphne’s daughter and her only heir. But even so, Helen doubted that Daphne was just trying to protect her.

  After a few moments of biting her lip, trying to find a hole in Claire’s argument, Helen had to admit to herself that the only reason she disagreed was because Daphne had abandoned her as a baby. She simply didn’t trust her. Maybe she was being too harsh. Maybe this time Daphne was only trying to help.

  “Okay, you’re right . . . I have major issues about Beth or Daphne or whatever she’s calling herself this decade. But I wouldn’t be so suspicious if she’d just answer the damn phone when I called once in a while,” Helen said with exasperation. “I don’t expect her to tell me everything she’s doing, but it would nice to know what country she’s in, at least.”

  “Have you ever considered that maybe it’s safer for you if you don’t know where she is or what she’s doing?” Claire asked gently. Helen opened her mouth to argue and shut it again, knowing she wouldn’t win that point, either. But she still wished she knew where the hell Daphne was.

  Daphne held her breath and stayed very, very still. She’d managed to convince her lungs that they only needed a fraction of the air they were used to, but there wasn’t much she could do about her hammering heart. The man she had taken a blood oath to kill was in the next room. She had to find a way to calm herself, or all her sacrifice would be in vain.