Seeking Daylight

by Becky Poirier

  “We need to go back,” Seth said instantly. There was no way we would be able to make it back to our sanctuary before the clouds covered our location, but we could seek refuge in the clinic. A night spent with the new Alex wasn’t something I wanted, but there seemed little alternative to our situation. Seth grabbed a hold of my hand as we started rushing back toward the clinic.

  We suddenly stopped in our tracks when we heard the all too familiar screeching sound of the infected. My blood ran cold. They were close and they knew we were out here. They were probably watching us. If they saw us heading back to the clinic, then they would attack. We’d all be killed. The clinic didn’t have what we needed to defend it and with only three of us we’d be overrun in minutes.

  Seth looked around at the buildings around us. Each one looked worse than the last. I could see the panic growing as he struggled to find a solution to our predicament. We needed to find a place to hunker down in for the night. “I…don’t know this part of the city,” he admitted defeated. He was looking at me with real fear and it wasn’t for his own life. He was terrified for me.

  That was when I finally saw the buildings around me and let the memory flood back in. I remembered crawling out of the subway tunnel just a few blocks from my old sanctuary, walking past these very buildings, all bloodied and bruised unable to focus on anything. I may have been out of it that day, but I somehow retained a mental map of the area.

  “I do,” I replied pulling him by the hand and walking as fast as my ankle would allow. My heart raced the closer we got to my old home. I didn’t know if it was fear of reliving the past or fear of the impending storm clouds that were moving in much faster than I could move. The screeches only intensified, even though I knew we were moving further away from the infected. They could smell us. They’d locked onto our scent and would find us wherever we went. But my sanctuary had something these other buildings didn’t, a panic room. And this time we were going to make it there on time.

  We’d just run past the subway tunnel entrance when the clouds came overhead. The freezing rain began to pour down on us as the wind whipped against our exposed skin. My hair was soaked through within minutes. It was hitting us so hard it was hard to see where we were going. Every bit of exposed skin felt like it was burning. “Is it much farther?” he asked trying to keep the fear out of his voice.

  I didn’t answer. Answering would only slow us down and we were only a couple of blocks away now. Of course, the infected were already after us. By the time we reached the front steps of the old office building I’d once called home, we could hear the screeching of the infected even louder than the howling of the wind.

  I slammed the door behind us and went to latch the heavy metal bar behind it only to realize it had been broken in half. Our clothes, jackets, were soaked through and we were both shaking both from the cold and from the immediate threat. A cold sweat dripped down my skin as I burst into a full out run dragging Seth behind me. He’d already be safe by now if he knew where this place was. I was slowing us down. My mistakes had already taken the life of one person I loved and infected another. There was no way in hell I was losing anyone else. We’d just reached the third floor where the old boss’s office was, when we heard the front door crash open with such force, I was sure it had snapped off its hinges landing on the floor.

  “Tell me where,” Seth said picking me up off the floor and tossing me on his back. I held on tight as I muttered directions to him. This was the one part of the building I knew by heart. We made it through the door to the office. I hopped off Seth’s back and then I went to work on the combination to open the lock to the panic room. My hands were shaking so bad I was afraid I would mess up the numbers. All the while the screeches were growing louder causing my heart to practically jump out of my chest. My ear drums felt like they were moments away from bursting, but I didn’t have time to cover my ears. The fear was overwhelming, but I stayed focus because I couldn’t let this happen again.

  Seth was bouncing nervously on his feet poised for a fight that would be absolutely futile. I finally got the lock to open, swung the door open, and pulled Seth in the room. I slammed the door closed again and hit the automatic locks just in time to feel the door shake under the pressure of an infected slamming its body against the super thick metal. The room was pitch black only adding to the panic that was burning inside me. This room had never been tested under attack from the infected. I had no idea if it would hold, I only hoped it would. The door shook only slightly with every attempt made to break it. The screeching had grown now. There were more in the room. Several more attempts were made but the door held. I nearly screamed out loud when Seth pulled me into his arms.

  “Sorry,” he whispered. “Just me in here. Where are we anyways?” His body was ice cold like mine, and he was shivering just as badly.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  I searched around in the dark for one of the battery powered lamps on the side table. My knee smashed into the side of the bed and I stubbed my toe against the end table, causing a curse word slip out before finally finding the switch. The room was still fairly dark under the limited light of the lamp, but at least we could see each other now and the room. It had been left untouched, completely as I remembered it from the last time Alex, and I had been in there. There was more dust on the shelves, but other than that it had been left alone.

  The bed still stood in the middle of the room with the sheets that had been freshly changed the morning before the attack. The air was a little stale, but it had been closed up for nearly two months so that was to be expected. The shelves on the side had some water and food left over, batteries and of course the old condoms. Even the old music player was still sitting on the nightstand.

  “Where are we?” Seth asked again.

  “Welcome to the love shack,” I said with a shy grin. My teeth chattered as I slipped my soaking wet jacket off. When we’d left it had been pretty warm, so I’d opted for a fall jacket rather than a winter coat. I was paying for that choice now. My long sleeve t-shirt was nearly as wet as the jacket.

  I slid down the end of the bed as cautiously as I could manage before my butt hit the floor, my back rested against the foot of the bed. The infected were still trying to get in, but they were no longer throwing their bodies against the door. I finally took in a deep breath, allowing my heart to slow.

  Seth was looking around the room, taking it all in. I could see his eyes searching the walls, the ceiling, seeing if there were any possible weak points. “It’s a panic room. The entire room is built with the same kind of steal as the door. If they can’t get through the door, then they’re not getting in here.”

  I was positive of that fact now, so much so that my heart rate had completely slowed, and my breathing was back to normal. If only I could shake the bone chilling cold. Even my thick socks were soaked. I slid my one shoe off and tugged at the sock which slowly inched its way off my foot. Now that the intensity of the situation had worn off my ankle was throbbing. I reached down and unstrapped my walking cast. My leg instantly felt relieved as I pulled it off along with my remaining sock. I knew the cast should stay on, but I just needed a break from it, and I told myself I’d keep pressure off of my ankle while it was off.

  “Are you sure there’s no weak spots?” He asked looking up at the air vent.

  “They’re too big to get through there, plus that air vent is separate from the rest of the buildings infrastructure in order to keep this place completely cut off from the rest of the office. You can sit down, it’s safe. I promise.” I patted the floor beside me.

  He hesitated for a minute more before finally giving in and sitting down on the floor beside me. He slowly began to relax, though his body still twitched from the cold. It wasn’t easy to let the anxiety go with the constant screeching coming from the other side of the door, but we were both trying. At least it was slightly muted in here. I hoped if we were quiet enough, they might give up and leave. Thankfully, the office outside the pani
c room had large windows that would bring in lots of sunlight. Only problem was it would be complete guess work on our part as to when the sun would shine through those windows again. Seth had a watch but that didn’t mean anything now that a storm had rolled in.

  Seth seemed to be thinking along the same lines as me. He was searching the room to see what supplies we had to get us through. Then a thought suddenly occurred to him. “There’s no washroom in here.” I laughed. That would be a bad thing if we were stuck in here for several days.

  “The door’s hidden behind the shelf. It’s fully functional and quite luxurious compared to the washrooms back at the factory.”

  “Hey, I worked hard on that washroom, no need to insult my skills.” I let out a little chuckle with a sigh. It was nice, if only for the moment, to feel safe enough to laugh. He was smiling at me again like his old self. The weight of what Alex had asked him was gone. We hadn’t really had the chance to discuss when it would happen. I didn’t even know if he was willing to do it, but that was a subject for another time.

  I reached down and tried to rub some of the pain out of my ankle. “Do you think it’s fractured again?” Seth asked.

  I shook my head. “No, it’s just sore. It gets this way when I try to do too much too fast.” I tried blowing some hot air into my hands to warm them up, but it wasn’t working. Seth took my hands in his and rubbed them together trying to warm both of us up, but it wasn’t very effective seeing as we were both just as cold.

  “We’re going to get hypothermia if we don’t do something soon,” he said.

  “What do you suggest? I didn’t exactly bring a spare change of clothes.”

  “Well we could always use our bodies to warm each other up,” he smiled. Of course, he would think of something like that in a time of crisis. We did need to get out of these wet clothes, but I didn’t think the two of us being naked together was the smartest idea. I was already struggling to resist giving in to temptation when we were fully clothed.

  Thankfully, I remembered that my old group members used to keep some things in the bathroom. “I have a better idea,” I replied with a smile. I hopped over to the shelf pushed it aside and opened the door to the bathroom. There was a little lamp in there too that I was able to light up. And sure enough, the two white hotel robes were still in there. They’d picked them up on one of their raids. I’d thought it was the dumbest thing to come back with at the time. Now I was grateful for their stupidity. I tossed one at Seth who almost looked disappointed.

  “I’ll change in here,” I said closing the door. The limited light made for a very spooky atmosphere. I didn’t like how it created shadows on the wall. I hung my damp clothing up in the shower and rung my hair out in the bathroom sink, before wrapping it up in a towel. When I was sure that my robe was securely wrapped around myself, I knocked on the door to make sure it was safe to come out.

  Seth was curled up on the floor where I’d left him. His robe was wrapped around him tightly, his clothes were hung up on the shelf. He’d stopped shivering. I was only just starting to warm up. There were still goosebumps on my skin, that only got bigger when I saw how little Seth was wearing. It took all my effort to keep my hormones in check.

  I hobbled over despite his offer for help and sat back down beside him. “Feeling better?” He asked. I nodded. The robe was the softest thing I’d ever worn. I tried to relax where I was, but something was bothering me. It took me a couple of minutes to figure out what it was. Seth realized something was wrong at the same time I did.

  Our attention was pulled back to the creatures when we realized how quiet it had grown. There was no more screeching, no more banging against the door. It wasn’t a good sign. They wouldn’t just give up like that. We had something they wanted. We’d learned that much from the little time Doc had with his specimen…with Alex.

  “What are they up to?” I asked not really expecting an answer. Seth was just as clueless as I was.

  He leaned over pressing his ear to the floor. “You said the whole room was built out of the super strong steel…does that include the floor?”

  I laid my head down on the floor beside his and listened. They were below us trying desperately to get through. I could tell by the way they were screeching and clawing that they weren’t having any success and I knew they wouldn’t. Thankfully, the boss kept blueprints of the building in his office. I’d studied them once upon a time. This room was the only thing about the blueprints that actually stuck out to me. It was a good thing that it did stick, otherwise I would have been just as worried as Seth.

  I pulled myself back up to sitting position. “The whole building was structured on metal beams and this room not only has that, but it also has the rest of the super strong material on all surfaces. It was meant to survive any number of catastrophes. I promise you we’re safe. You can relax.”

  “You know this place really well,” he said coming to sit back beside me. I knew where this was leading. “This was where you were before we met.” I nodded staring ahead at the wall. I still hadn’t allowed myself to go back to that time. We may have been in the same room where I’d shared myself with Alex, in the same building that Molly and I called home. That didn’t mean I was ready to let the emotions of it back in.

  I closed my eyes and tried to let go of everything. It was a technique that Helen had been teaching me. Before the plague she’d been a yoga instructor and one of her skills was deep meditation. It wasn’t a skill I was finding so easy, but I was trying to learn. The few times we’d found to practice it, I’d walked away feeling better than I had in my whole life.

  It was hard to get into the meditation zone though, when you could feel eyes staring at you. “What?” I asked with annoyance, my eyes still closed.

  “You called this place the love shack. Why did you call it that?”

  “Take a look around,” I smiled opening my eyes, “or better yet just press the play button on that music player.”

  He eyed me curiously as he stood up heading towards the nightstand. He sat down on the edge of the bed as he pressed the button on the music player. His reaction to the song that blasted through the speakers was priceless. The player was midway through the chorus of ‘I’ll Make Love to You.’ It took him several panicked attempts to shut the thing down. All the while I was laughing so hard my sides hurt.

  When he came back over, his cheeks were the reddest I’d ever seen them. It took me several minutes before I could settle the laughing down. Every time I’d try, I’d look at Seth and start laughing again. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d laughed so hard.

  “You, done yet?” He asked. He was smiling at me while pretending to be irritated.

  I tried to say yes but the word came out as a laugh and it started up all over again. He watched me with a look of amusement on his face and then without warning he pressed his lips against mine. Instantly, I stopped laughing. Warmth filled my body sparking the same desire I’d felt the night we met Alex on the roof. That felt like a lifetime ago, not just a week.

  I think he was expecting me to pull away. His lips only stopped kissing mine for a moment as he looked into my eyes judging whether or not what he’d done was okay. When I didn’t take the opportunity to move away, he started kissing me again. This time, the shock having worn off, I kissed him back just as intensely as I had that last time.

  The desires were building again, just like I knew they would. And I really didn’t want to stop. Feeling his lips on mine, his hands on my back pulling me in closer, I just wanted to be with him. But I couldn’t, not here.

  “I can’t do this,” I said finally breaking away. I hopped up off the floor weakly backing into the shelf against the wall.

  “I’m sorry,” he apologized as he stood up. “I promised you there’d be no pressure. I only meant for it to be a small kiss to stop the laughing. I never meant to take it so far.”

  “It wasn’t just you,” I assured him. “And trust me I want to; I really want to.” He smiled ba
ck at me. There was hope in his eyes. I knew what I said was true. I wanted him more than ever. Seeing Alex had been exactly what I needed. Yes, he was still alive, but not for much longer. He didn’t want to be and one way or another, his wish would be granted. I owed him that. And knowing that he was moving on, made it easier for me to move on. I should have hurt more over Alex, but I didn’t. At some point in the last couple of months I’d managed to pretty much let him go. Seth was in my heart now, more so than I think Alex had ever been. Alex showed me that I could love and for that I would be forever grateful. But Seth was my true love. What I felt for him was so much stronger. The desire to be with Seth was so strong it was taking everything inside of me to resist the temptation.

  He moved in slowly, cautiously judging my reactions. I didn’t move away. His body was so close to mine I could feel just how warm he was now. The way he was looking at me…it was the way my father used to look at my mother. She never saw it. But when he looked at her, Molly and I saw it. To him she was the most beautiful woman in the world, and he loved her with all that he had. Seth was looking at me the same way. And I knew I was dangerously close to giving into my desires.

  He brushed his hand across my cheek. A warm shiver vibrated through my whole body. “If it’s what you want, then what’s holding you back?” he asked. I searched for a way to explain it to him that wouldn’t make him think it was all about Alex. Yes, he was the reason for stopping, but not in the way I was sure Seth would take it. He gave up on waiting for my answer as his lips moved to my neck. My whole body quivered with desire. His hands wrapped around my body pulling me closer. “After all, this is the Love Shack. Shouldn’t we take advantage of the alone time,” he whispered as he nibbled my ear. My knees felt weak. His lips moved back to mine and though I told myself not to, I kissed him back anyways.