Tidings of Joy

by Margaret Daley

  “It’s supposed to snow tonight. What if we can’t come back?” Crystal threw a glance over her shoulder at her tree.

  “The van has snow tires. If we can’t come tomorrow, we will as soon as possible since Christmas is only two weeks away.” Tanya scanned the darkening clouds, a few flakes falling. She held out a gloved hand and caught a flake which melted immediately.

  Tanya tugged the blanket up and made sure that Crystal was completely covered. She snuggled closer to Chance, placed her arm around her daughter’s shoulder and pulled her against her side to warm her as much as she could. The temperature in the past hour they had been out had dropped at least five degrees. The wind gusted.

  “That hot chocolate sounds so good right now,” Crystal said, shivering.

  “It’s only a few more minutes.” Chance directed the horses onto the road that led to the barn. “I wonder what the others got.”

  Five minutes later Chance brought the horses to a halt right outside the barn’s back doors. He hopped down and went inside to retrieve Crystal’s wheelchair.

  Dane helped him get Crystal out of the sled. “Darcy and Joshua were gone when we got back a little while ago. She went to the hospital. Lizzie and Beth were waiting for us and insisted we have the hot chocolate and sweets. Darcy doesn’t want us all to go to the hospital. She wants us to wait until she calls. It could be a false alarm.”

  “This could be it. She’s only a couple of weeks early. If she has the baby now, she won’t spend Christmas in the hospital. She told me once she was afraid she would have her baby on Christmas Day and miss the celebration.” Tanya climbed down from the sled and followed Crystal, Dane and Chance into the barn.

  Inside everyone was back except Nick and Jesse’s family. Beth helped Lizzie, Darcy’s stepmother, pour three mugs of hot chocolate, then carried them over to Tanya, Chance and Crystal.

  After tying his pine to the roof of his car, Samuel and his son came in from the front. “Where’s your tree?” the reverend asked Chance, taking his own mug from his wife’s hand.

  “Still in the ground. I’m coming back to dig it up.”

  “That’s ambitious. The ground may be too frozen to do it.”

  “I’ve got to try. Crystal fell in love with this one and wants to plant it in the yard after Christmas. It hasn’t been that cold until lately.”

  “And winter has now hit with a vengeance.” Tanya joined Chance and Samuel, cradling the heated mug between her hands. She relished the warm steam, laced with the scent of chocolate, wafting to her face.

  Shamus Flanaghan’s cell phone rang. After he answered it, he said to the group, “It’s official. She’s gonna have the baby tonight, God willing.”

  “Let’s say a prayer for Darcy and Joshua.” Samuel moved into the middle of the circle and bowed his head.

  Tanya clasped Crystal’s and Chance’s hands, remembering back to when her daughter was born.

  “Lord, You are about to give a loving couple another child. Please protect them and be with Darcy and the new baby through her birth and the days to follow. Also, help Joshua to give Darcy the support and encouragement she will need tonight. We will be here to teach their new daughter Your importance and the love You and Your son, Jesus, have for us.”

  Amid the others’ amens, Tanya heard Chance’s clear strong voice utter the word. Her heart swelled with the sound. He had attended church with her and Crystal the past two weeks. His presence added a joy and hope that she hadn’t felt until he had started going to church. Maybe he was ready to forgive and put his trust in God again.

  Jesse and her family came into the barn. “Darcy’s in labor?” she asked, looking around at the smiles on everyone’s faces.

  “Yes, they just wheeled her into delivery.” Shamus hugged his grandson to his side.

  “Well, what are we standing around here for? Let’s get to the hospital.” Jesse nudged her husband who dragged the tree they selected behind him.

  “The staff isn’t gonna know what hit them when we come,” Tanya said with a laugh.

  “Nah. Remember the last time? Granted, we have added a few more people, but I think they expect us to all turn out.” Beth looped her arm through Samuel’s.

  “We’ve practically doubled in size.” Jesse held up her hand, counting off the people as she named them. “There’s Samuel, his children, Chance, Dane.”

  “Just wait until you have yours.” Tanya started for the front doors. “Less than six months to go.”

  Jesse moaned. “Don’t remind me. Six months of gaining weight and looking like a beached whale.”

  Chance opened the massive double doors. “You can drop me by the apartment on the way to the hospital.”

  Tanya halted halfway to the van. “You don’t want to come and celebrate the birth of Darcy and Joshua’s daughter?”

  “I don’t belong. It’s a family—well, not a family affair but…you know what I mean?”

  She placed her hand on her waist, aware that it was beginning to snow a little harder. A couple of flakes caught on her eyelashes and she blinked. “No, I don’t understand. You’re a part of this group. Darcy would be disappointed if you weren’t there.”

  “I don’t—”

  “Going by the house is out of my way. I want to get to the hospital before it really starts snowing.” Tanya walked to the back to operate the lift for Crystal.

  When she secured her daughter in the van, she moved around to the driver’s side and slipped in. “Besides, you are at my mercy. You go where I go.”

  Chance opened his mouth to say something, but no words came out. He pressed it closed and stared straight ahead.

  CHAPTER TEN

  At the end of the church pew Chance sat between Tanya and Crystal in her wheelchair. He stifled a yawn as Samuel rose to give his sermon. Being up half the night took its toll on him, especially when he didn’t sleep the other half because of the woman sitting next to him and her insistence that he accompany her and Crystal to the hospital. To be a part of Darcy and Joshua’s celebration of their new daughter. To be a part of the close friendship the five families had for each other. No matter how much Tanya wanted it, he was still an outsider. He would always be the outsider.

  But for a few minutes last night, it had been nice to wonder what it would feel like being a part of this close-knit group of friends.

  As Samuel began to talk about hope, using the illustration of the birth of Joshua and Darcy’s daughter, Tanya slipped her hand over his, sending him a smile. Deep in her eyes he saw a connection forged between them with the shared experiences of the past few months. A strong urge to tug his hand away deluged him with panic.

  Then Samuel’s words came to Chance, calming him. “Jesus died for us. God gave us hope with His Son’s resurrection. Peter best said it, ‘Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to His abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.’ Remember those words when you think there is no hope in your life. Remember what Christ went through for us in the end, all because He loved us. Believe in Him and you will always have that hope.”

  Was it that simple? Chance wanted it to be. Mentally recapping his life, he needed to do something. He needed a purpose. Soon his job would be done here. Then what?

  As everyone around him rose for the final song, Chance stood and joined in with Crystal and Tanya. The calm that had started with Samuel’s sermon spread outward to encompass his whole body. By the time Chance left the pew and followed Crystal and Tanya toward the exit where Samuel greeted his congregation, Chance latched onto the feelings developing inside him. He liked those feelings—the peace. He hadn’t had that in a long time.

  “Nice service, Samuel,” Chance said and shook his friend’s hand.

  “After being up most of t
he night, I wasn’t sure I would be able to string more than a few sentences together.”

  “Well, you managed just fine.”

  Samuel studied him. “Did they give you something to think on?”

  He nodded.

  “Then this has been a good day.” Samuel turned to Tanya and Crystal. “Are you all staying for refreshments?”

  “For a few minutes. We still have to go get our Christmas tree this afternoon.” Although Tanya answered Samuel’s question, her gaze never left Chance’s face.

  The second they were out in the church foyer, she stopped him while Crystal continued toward the rec hall. Off from the others milling about, Tanya leaned close and whispered, “You felt God’s presence, didn’t you?”

  “Yes.”

  She beamed. “He hasn’t abandoned you. Let’s go get something to drink and eat. We’ve got hard physical work ahead of us this afternoon. I want the Christmas tree up and decorated this evening. Think that’s possible?”

  He chuckled. “Yeah. I definitely think it is.”

  * * *

  Later that evening, a fire burned in the fireplace. The scent of wood permeated Tanya’s living room. Cozy. Romantic. With only the lights from the Christmas tree and the blaze, for a while, the rest of the world didn’t exist. There were only the three of them—Crystal, Chance and her. Charlie slept in front of the fire, oblivious to what was going on around him.

  Tanya stood back and surveyed the small pine with so many ornaments on its limbs that they drooped, the bottom ones almost to the carpet. “I won’t be surprised if one morning we wake up and find all the balls have slid off the tree.” Her head tilted to the side, she tapped her finger against her chin.

  “We can always remove some.” Crystal positioned her wheelchair next to the pine and reached for a cardboard circle colored with red and green markers and a silver glittered glob in the middle.

  “No! Not that one. Remember you made that for me in first grade.”

  Crystal went for another homemade one, and Tanya shook her head. After going through several more, her daughter blew out a breath, her bangs lifting.

  “Mom, half of these are ugly.”

  “Not to me. They’re precious. There’s a story behind every ornament on that tree.”

  Chance moved forward, his arm brushing against Tanya’s. “We had ornaments like that.”

  The roughened edge to his voice riveted Tanya’s attention to his face. Pain etched his features. “Where are they? Maybe we can get another small tree and you can have one in your apartment.”

  “No!” he said as forcefully as Tanya a moment ago.

  “You need something.” She itched to smooth away the creases in his expression.

  “Why? I’m perfectly content to come look at yours when I need a Christmas fix. Besides, I don’t want anyone to go to any trouble. I don’t spend enough time there.”

  Crystal yawned loudly. “I’m tired. We did a lot today. Since I have some homework I need to finish, I’d better do it before I fall asleep. Good night, Chance, Mom.”

  “Night, Crystal.” Chance’s gaze drilled into Tanya’s.

  “If you need some help, let me know, honey.” Tanya refused to look away from him.

  When the sound of the wheelchair faded down the hall, Tanya asked, “What happened to your Christmas decorations?” He would never get on with his life if he didn’t deal with his loss, every aspect of it. She knew; she’d been there with Tom.

  Pain still reflected in his expression, Chance pivoted away and walked to the fireplace, staring down at the flames as they licked the huge logs in the grate. He stuffed his hands into the front pockets of his black jeans. Focusing on the plaid pattern of his flannel shirt for a moment, Tanya gave him some time to bring his emotions under control.

  As his rigid stance dissolved into a relaxed one, Tanya strode to him and laid her hand on his arm. “What happened?”

  After taking in a calming breath, he visibly swallowed and said, “Ruth’s parents took them, along with most of her and my daughter’s things.”

  “Why haven’t you gotten them back?”

  “I don’t want them. The picture I have in my apartment is all I need. I can’t bring either one back. They are in my past and as much as I wish they hadn’t been murdered, I can’t change what happened.” His gaze sought hers. “Today, for the first time in a long while, I felt hope when I listened to Samuel’s sermon. I don’t want to let that feeling go.”

  “Then don’t. I have fond and loving memories of Tom, but I have had to learn to move on with my life. I can’t afford for Crystal’s sake to live in the past.”

  His smile deepened the dimples in his cheeks and the pain disappeared completely from his gaze. “I’m working on it. I enjoyed decorating your—” he looked at the small pine “—uh, tree this evening.”

  She basked in the teasing that shone in his eyes. “It’s not too bad. I’m beginning to think like Crystal. That tree was calling out for someone to take it, and after Christmas, we can plant it in our backyard so we can remember this holiday for years to come.” I know I will. Chance’s presence made the first Christmas since Tom’s death bearable to her and Crystal. “I’ve got some more hot chocolate. Want a refill?”

  “Sure. But you sit and I’ll go get it. I know my way around your kitchen.”

  Tanya settled on the couch before the fireplace with the tree off to the side, listening to Chance rummaging around in her kitchen. When he reappeared with the two mugs, steam floating upward, her stomach flip-flopped with his look that said he only had eyes for her. She wanted to savor this moment so she could revisit it in the future when Chance left Sweetwater. If only he would stay, then—She shook that wish from her mind. She had to be practical for once and steel her heart as much as possible against the hurt that would follow his departure.

  Pausing in front of her, Chance held her mug out. She slipped her fingers around the warm ceramic, brushing against his. He eased down next to her, close but not touching. All Tanya wanted to do was feather her lips across his, be surrounded by his embrace. But she stayed where she was and concentrated on taking one sip, then another of her hot chocolate.

  “I love chocolate, and this is great on a cold night,” she said to break the silence after a few minutes.

  He placed his mug on the coffee table, half his drink gone. “You get no complaints from me.”

  Tired from a long, productive day, she set her mug next to his, relaxed back against the cushion and watched the flames dancing in the fireplace, the red-orange blaze mesmerizing. Her eyelids slid closed. From afar she heard the crackling of the fire, felt the warmth it generated….

  “Tanya, we’d better call it a night.”

  Chance’s voice penetrated the fog that shrouded her mind. Tanya blinked her eyes open and found herself pressed against his side on the couch, his arm along the back of the cushion, her head resting on his shoulder. What a great way to spend an evening. Content, she didn’t move for a good minute. Then slowly she straightened.

  “Yes, you’re right. Six o’clock tomorrow morning will come soon enough.” Tanya glanced at her watch and realized she must have dozed about fifteen minutes, cuddled in his arms. That thought sent her heart beating a shade faster.

  Chance unfolded his long length and rose, then tugged her up. He wound his arms around her waist and brought her near. “As much as I’m enjoying myself, I agree. Tomorrow starts a long work week.”

  He bent his head a few inches closer, and Tanya could smell the chocolate on his breath. “Thank you for digging up the tree for us. It really is a nice one. Just don’t tell Crystal I said so. I love how protective she is over it.”

  “My lips are sealed.”

  Her gaze fixed upon those lips, and she couldn’t take her eyes off them. She wanted him to kiss her. Ev
ery part of her screamed for it.

  Slowly his mouth settled over hers, ending her frustration. His kiss stamped her his, even if he would never know how much she really cared about him. She would never forget this time with him.

  As he deepened the kiss, she melted against him, clinging to him. With each second that passed, she became more and more connected to him on a level that left her shaken. He was a man who had suffered greatly and was trying to put his life back together. And today he had taken the first step in his journey back to the Lord.

  Chance pulled away and firmly put some space between them. His breathing was short and raspy. His look nearly undid her all over again. It proclaimed the connection in his glittering blue depths. Her mind wiped blank, she stared at him as he collected himself, the rapid rise and fall of his chest slowing.

  “I need to leave. See you tomorrow,” he finally said in a voice rough, intense with emotion.

  She didn’t follow him to the door but just watched him stalk toward the front hallway. A few seconds later she heard the door shut. She pressed her hands to her cheeks. The warmth beneath her palms seared the past few minutes into her mind.

  Their relationship had moved to another level tonight. She could no longer kid herself that she and Chance were just good friends. The kiss they had shared made a mockery of that. She had wanted more, and in his expression she’d seen he had, too.

  * * *

  Chance stormed into his apartment and headed for the closet. He dragged out his duffel bag, emptied the top drawer of the chest and stuffed his T-shirts, jeans and socks into his only piece of luggage. Halfway back to the closet to get his pants and shirts, he halted.

  Staring at the overflowing duffel bag, he realized how many material items he had acquired in the past three months. But most of all, he realized he couldn’t run away. He wasn’t a man who went back on a promise, even though he had made it to himself. He would stay through the holidays and make sure that Tanya and Crystal were cared for.