Isekai Rebuilding Project: Volume 2

by Yukika Minamino

  “Anything we could do?”

  Tiamat slowly shook her head to answer my question. Apparently, we couldn’t prepare any of the tools in her arsenal in our situation, and we’re not even supposed to try and help when we weren’t asked to do so. Only detectives in mystery novels (and those online horoscopes) try to deduce someone’s mind. Counselors, on the other hand, wait as long as it takes for the patient to open up to them.

  “All we can do is sit back and watch, then?”

  “You may feel like it’s not enough, but the human heart usually doesn’t take a straight course.”

  At that, I turned around to find Leon petting Baze’s fur. It seemed more like compensation than a part of pet therapy. I couldn’t help but avert my eyes.

  8.

  Leon the Demon Lord did not have a panic attack upon seeing Baze’s human form and only did one long exhale. Perhaps Tiamat understood the meaning of that action, but I was far from doing so. I couldn’t dig in with a bunch of questions either.

  “When she’s ready, she’ll tell us on her own.”

  I could only decide to trust my fiancée’s words.

  There were no incidents at the town we stayed the night in, either, other than rumors going around about us. Rumors about the Hermit that defeated the monster army out of Mostail with the hero of the city, Earl Agamemnon; about the wise holy man, with the Dragon Princess and Star Breaker in tow, traveling the world to bring it peace and prosperity; about the saint who never accepts any reward other than the smiles of the people he saves.

  So... who was this sketchy guy that sounded like some cult leader? Even in bars, the bards were singing about us to showcase their talent. If there was a hole, I would have buried myself in it.

  “That expression originated in the ancient text of Jia Yi, by the way, meant to be used when you are ashamed of your own lack of knowledge. Not when you are embarrassed.”

  “Damn it. If there was a hole I would bury myself in it!”

  “During the bubble economy in Japan, it was used for a much different meaning, since it was trendy to have as many sexual partners as possible.”

  “That usage is so derailed.”

  Trivia DLC in full force. That knowledge was seriously useless.

  “What hole?” Leon crooked her neck.

  See! Look who responded! A highschooler!

  “I-I-I-I-I think you’ll understand when you’re older. I think. Probably.”

  I tried to mend the situation, albeit a little rattled, while Tiamat was over there enjoying her ale like she did nothing wrong. Damn it.

  “Weirdo.”

  The girl laughed, ever so slightly I thought. Was that a good sign? More importantly, I was being called a weirdo way too often. I wasn’t weird. I was the straight man of the group, if anything. I looked at Tiamat for some assistance.

  “Another one.”

  “Oh, another ale for me too, please.”

  Since I was met with a spectacular brush-off, I ordered a drink too. We were munching on soybeans and some stewed meat. They were only seasoned with salt, but the flavor of the meat pulled through. They went pretty great with ale. We were no longer in season for edamame, but they seemed to be cooking the soybeans themselves.

  “It’s good, right? These were taught to us by the Hermit, too.”

  The woman who appeared to be the manager of the joint informed us of this blatant lie as she brought us ale. I never came with dishes like these, so it must have been Mister Murdock’s doing. His troupe was way ahead of us, and it seemed that they advertised soybean dishes everywhere they went.

  It was great PR to claim that the dishes originated from Hermits, and they had actually traveled with those Hermits themselves. What’s more, the ingredients were practically free. Given the prowess of that old storyteller, I expected them to make bank if they sold the dishes for dirt cheap. They were business-savvy, alright. I let out a chuckle as I imagined the scene unfolding.

  The capital of Noura, Nourn, was about the same size as Lishua of Azul with a population of around thirty to forty thousand. Once we arrived at the city without a hitch, we first decided on the inn to become our base of operation. I mean, there was no way we would have an audience with the king just by walking up to the castle. We’d be right back on the streets in a minute. We couldn’t even reach the conversation stage without a plan to have an audience with him.

  We did have a good connection though, by the name of Earl Agamemnon. While earldom was not one of the highest ranks in this country, he was trusted with a major port. I imagined he had considerable influence in court, and we had his heir with us: Ruey. We would get an appointment through him.

  That was our first step, but this wasn’t something we could immediately expect the results of. A letter, accompanied by a bribe, would change hands a few times before reaching the king. This process alone would take days. Then the king would arrange his schedule and send us a messenger with the date of our meeting. By a rough estimate, I expected this process to take ten to twelve days.

  “Mm. It would still be a major event just to have an audience with him,” Tiamat said.

  “Yeah. It’s the same thing as requesting to see our emperor.”

  By handing a solitary letter to one of the imperial palace guards. In Japan, there’s no way that could fly.

  One reason that we could pull it off in this world was our title as Hermits. Just as it did in the kingdom of Azur, it carried a special weight such that even a king could not ignore a request from us. Another reason was, as I’ve mentioned, our connection. The recommendation of Ruey Agamemnon, a member of noble society, would become a competent weapon for us. And finally, a handsome reward. A trifold strategy that would make Oda Nobunaga blush!

  “What does this have to do with the battle of Nagashino?”

  Leon gave me an icy stare.

  Stop it, little girl. If you look at me like... I’ll fall for you.

  “Mm. I can’t give you an icy look, so I’ll give you a hot breath.”

  “Don’t! You’ll kill me!”

  Tiamat and I were goofing around.

  “Weirdo.”

  Leon seemed exasperated. This was going to be my playstyle for a while. Adults were nothing she had to fear. She was at a good place when she found us a little annoying, even. I had suggested to Tiamat that we up our lovey-dovey-ness until Leon grew exasperated, after noticing a very slight sense of relief in Leon every time she called me a weirdo. My guess was that she feared any non-weirdo adult. Tiamat didn’t oppose.

  “It can’t hurt her,” she’d said, and agreed to play along.

  Tiamat and I had been putting our love on display ever since, no matter who was watching.

  “So that’s what you call a comedy routine in Hokkaido? I didn’t know,” said Leon.

  “Apologize to all 5.3 million of its residents!”

  “You will?”

  “Sorry.”

  Perhaps aided by my plan, it felt like Leon was slowly opening up to us. However, Tiamat had said that this was the most perilous stage, too. Leon had been abused for several years, at least. It would have been a little overconfident of us to imagine that we could thaw her frozen heart after a few days of knowing her.

  “But it is really boring just waiting for a royal messenger.” Tiamat, in human form, stretched her arms.

  Boring? We had just arrived at Nourn the same day. Did she think life was a sprint? Let’s take it slow. I, for one, wanted to laze around for a few days in the inn!

  “While we’re here, do you want to do a gig?”

  “I don’t see the connection.”

  All work and no play makes Eiji a dull boy.

  “We’re adventurers, but haven’t done any adventure-y things. We are in a fantasy world after all. This isn’t right.”

  Um... We did go hunt gagds, dug up beets, traveled with a band of performers, got caught up in a battle against the monster army, walked right into the Demon Lord’s lair, and now we were about to negotia
te with the Demon Lord and the king to find a peaceful resolution.

  “No, no. Don’t you think our journey has been rather eventful so far?”

  “I want to dungeon-crawl.”

  Now, we hadn’t done anything like that. No underground dungeons or treasure hunting adventurers. Everything we’d done so far had been all about day-to-day life.

  “Don’t you want to catch a monster and cook it?”

  “That’s definitely from a particular manga.”

  “I want to eat a Red Dragon.”

  “Isn’t that cannibalism?”

  Tiamat was a dragon. Why did she want to eat a dragon?

  “I hate to break it to you, Sir Eiji, Lady Tiamat. There are no dungeons around Nourn,” Ruey informed us with a half-chuckle.

  “How lame.”

  “If there was a dungeon, you really wanted to go, Tia?”

  My fiancée was always a wild one. We were about to see the king, and she wanted to dungeon-crawl.

  “Weirdo.”

  Wait, Leon. I’m not the weirdo here. Tiamat is.

  9.

  Our meeting with Lyser, the king of Noura, happened a lot faster than expected. To our surprise, a royal messenger came to our inn a mere two days after we gave the guard our letter. That was a little more than expedited.

  “Murdock had already gained an audience with him. The king was so very happy to hear of my father’s and your bravery, Sir Eiji, that he had been wanting to see us,” Ruey informed us, after speaking with the messenger.

  Way to go, Mister Murdock! He had managed to perform in the palace when his troupe arrived. I bet they made a fortune in tips. I planned to have him buy me a meal when I saw him. If they were still in Nourn, that is.

  “I told the messenger that we will come to the palace tomorrow.”

  “Hm? Why not today, Ruey?”

  The sun was still high. While I couldn’t tell accurate time without my Chronograph, it was definitely before noon. I didn’t understand why we would wait until the next day.

  “I thought it might be necessary for us to clean ourselves up a bit.”

  “Oof...”

  Right. I was dressed like any poor adventurer just starting out on his career. Definitely not the kind of look you want when going to see the king.

  “Why don’t we take the opportunity to go to a barber, Sir Eiji?”

  “Ooh, good idea,” I agreed as I played with the ends of my hair, which had grown a decent amount. Nearly three months had passed since I arrived in this world; three months without a single haircut. I had only been shaving by grazing my cheeks with a knife too. I was not well-kept by any means.

  We had soap with us, but it didn’t lather like a bar of soap in modern Japan. It was just congealed charcoal and animal fat anyway. It didn’t even smell good. Apparently, a rudimentary form of soap was first used in 3000 B.C.E., coincidentally invented both in ancient Rome and Mesopotamia around the same time. And, by the eighth century, ‘soap maker’ had become a profession. According to Tiamat, of course!

  In any case, I couldn’t deny that I hadn’t paid much mind to my appearance since arriving in this world. I couldn’t lick myself clean like Baze or Hieronymus.

  “Mm. You do need to at least keep yourself presentable. Not only when meeting royalty, but anyone.”

  With that Tiamat sent us off, after making plans to meet up later and get decent clothes. Of course, we weren’t talking luxuries like made-to-order stuff from tailors. We weren’t nobles or tycoons. Just like many commoners, all we needed were touched-up second-hand wear. Not that those were very cheap either.

  It may be well-known that haircuts used to be performed by surgeons. Barber surgeons, they were called. Their red, white, and blue pole used to represent blood, bandages, and the veins, respectively.

  Feeling refreshed after a haircut and a shave, Ruey and I met up with the rest of the party and took a walk around the streets of Nourn.

  “You look more manly now,” Tiamat said.

  “Are you falling for me all over again?”

  “Not that I ever fell for your looks to begin with. There’s no newfound love just because you became 1.12 times manlier.”

  “How precise of you! What’s with the decimal point?!”

  “It’s an approximation.”

  “What’s that in math, again?”

  Sorry, I was the opposite of a math major.

  “Not the perfectly accurate number, but an approximate number that is close enough to be used in its place,” Leon answered.

  Yeah? Well, I still didn’t get it.

  “...Like pi.”

  “Oh.”

  The example helped a lot. I learned to represent pi as 3.14, but pi is indivisible. Since it wouldn’t have been efficient to calculate hundreds and thousands of digits, we settled on 3.14 for convenience. Which means that my manliness was boosted about 1.12 times through the haircut, ignoring all the digits after the hundredth that make the rate indivisible.

  Wait. That was really a strange amount. Was the base product so bad that it improved a little over 10% from just a haircut? Or was 12% the best I could improve my looks, despite my efforts? As I sank into despair...

  “Weido,” Leon said, with a little laugh.

  In any case, we bought our clothes.

  “What is with that lackluster description?”

  “I mean, nothing noteworthy happened.”

  We just bought clothes that looked decent enough and changed into them. If I was some beautiful young lady, a scene in the dressing room might have had an audience. But who wanted an inside look of a man in his thirties picking out clothes?

  “There’s no fun in that.”

  “Utility over looks when it comes to adventuring.”

  Like a military uniform. It wasn’t something fashionable, but only needed to be functional and useful.

  “On the other hand, your outfit is on point, Sir Eiji. No one would guess that you’re an F... Oh, excuse me.”

  Ruey caught himself, much, much too late.

  “Mm. Doesn’t look at all like someone who can barely swing a sword.”

  Et tu, Tiamat?

  “He had a knack for fashion back in the Dragon Realm, too. Didn’t expect that, did you?”

  “Weirdo.”

  In the midst of the jeering, Baze alone refrained from any comments, but I figured that was only because he lacked interest. He was chewing on some skewers he had bought along the way.

  “The military uniform is the water main of all men’s fashion. Utility is the superior style.”

  Back in Japan, I had just incorporated a little military element into my outfit to make it a lot more fashionable. Now I simply did the same with adventurer gear. I included a few adventurer items in my ordinary street clothes, like a leather vest and a dagger on my belt. Dressing like some master adventurer would never have suited me well, anyway.

  “You don’t look trained, but there’s no flaw in your outfit. It exudes this quiet confidence. Anyone would take you for a skilled adventurer.”

  “Just on the outside,” I chuckled at Ruey’s compliment.

  I wasn’t a master in disguise, unfortunately. With no surprise factor or trick up my sleeve, I was a fresh rookie. With just one movement in combat I’d be found out.

  “Negotiations require a little visual aid. In that sense, our battle has already begun,” Tiamat said.

  Not being underestimated was pretty important. The dialogue wouldn’t even begin if he disregards us as some peasants or something. That’s why we had Leon buy an outfit too. Nothing over the top, but just a simple, clean outfit. Since Tiamat and Baze were transformed with a spell, they didn’t need any new clothes.

  “I feel like we should bring something, but there’s nothing we can buy that we could gift to the king.”

  We could actually be considered disrespectful for bringing anything unworthy. I find it often ignored in fantasy pieces, but disrespecting royalty was a serious crime. One punishable by de
ath. I mean, if an office worker disrespected the owner of the company in Japan, he’d get fired. Same kind of thing.

  I recalled a work of fiction where an entire clan was massacred because one of them committed the disrespect of not kneeling before the king, enraging him. But, even in modern-day Japan, you didn’t really have a place in society if you couldn’t show etiquette when it mattered.

  “Mm. Etiquette is also said to be a mask that covers one’s true emotions. Putting on a different persona to match the situation is a skill required of all adults in human society. I am thou, and thou art I.”

  “Per...”

  I began to strike a peculiar pose as Tiamat finished. I could have used some funky jazz in the background.

  “Is that really how an adult should act in Japan?”

  Leon was watching me with a shade of pity.

  10.

  The next morning, our party visited the castle. It was as large as the castle in Azur, with stereotypically medieval-fantasy architecture. Much more impressive than the melon castle in Yubari.

  “My name is Ruey, son of Earl Agamemnon. I am here to speak to His Majesty.”

  The earl’s heir declared our intention, loud and clear. Of course, I was sure that the guards were already aware.

  With a courteous bow, a soldier invited us five into the castle. I was a little jumpy because I had already done the screw up of being killed in a castle before. That was something I hadn’t really gotten over.

  Determined to not take any food or drink they would serve no matter how warm their welcome, I walked down the large corridor with my party. The aforementioned soldiers were leading us, followed by Ruey, then Tiamat and I side by side, with Leon and Baze in the rear.

  I chalked up the lifelessness that loomed around the extravagant décor to the castle being a public building. The clerk’s office was the same, too. Some female coworkers had attempted to breathe a little life into the place by decorating the counters with flowers and such, but it only changed the atmosphere a little. People never used that kind of facility unless they had to. No one goes to the city clerk’s office just to hang out. We the workers do want to make it inviting for anyone with a problem that needs solving, but we can’t really get rid of that formal atmosphere.