Hotshot

by Ahren Sanders

  “I’m thirty fucking years old. I’ve been around the block a few times, so it’s not like this is some fling. You always meant something to me, but I was too blind to see. Now, you don’t mean just something to me… you mean everything. Am I alone here? Going too fast? Pushing too hard? Did I read the signals wrong because I’m in love with you, and if you don’t feel the same way, now’s the time to say it.”

  She draws in an audible breath and wraps her arms around her stomach, staring at me as my chest heaves. Tears start to fall right before she lunges at me, curling her whole body around mine. My hands catch her as I take a step back to steady us both.

  Warm drops fall on my cheeks as she cups my face and crashes her mouth to mine.

  “In.” Kiss.

  “Love.” Kiss.

  “With.” Kiss.

  “You.” Kiss.

  “Too.” Kiss.

  Her lips linger on mine longer as she slips her tongue through, touching mine lightly then leaning back too soon. “I do feel the same,” she whispers.

  Warmth floods through my body and the anger disappears. “Jesus Christ, baby.” I squeeze tight. “Don’t ever do that shit to me again.”

  Her head drops to my shoulder, and she sniffs a few times, trembling against me. “I’m sorry, Shaw, but please, understand where I’m coming from. I’m so scared.”

  “Scared of what? Tell me and you’ll never be scared again.” There’s so much truth to the statement, me pleading with her to tell me everything.

  “Most people don’t go away on a weekend trip and come back in love.”

  “We’re not most people.”

  She leans back, her eyes shining bright, the tears almost dried. “I don’t want to hide. But can we wait until the next monthly dinner night and explain it to the guys?”

  “Mathis already knows my feelings. He called me out before we left. And obviously, Gail knows something.”

  She narrows her eyes then starts to laugh, throwing her head back. “Claire will know the minute she sees me.”

  “So it’s just Nick?”

  “And our parents.”

  “Why wait, Bizzy?”

  “Nicky is a bit protective. I think we need to ease him into this.”

  “He’s almost twenty-five. He’s a big boy.”

  She gives me a skeptical look and puts her forehead against mine. “You may not understand. You may never understand, but I need to plant the seeds with him. He may be a big, tough football player, and even more of a macho ass with the guys, but he’s very protective of me. I’d like to do this my way. It means a lot.”

  Well, shit. When she looks at me with such love and concern, I falter. To me, Nick is a powerhouse. But in reality, the woman in my arms, the woman I love, is also his best friend, the one woman he’d die for, so understanding starts to sink in.

  “I’m not happy about this, but we’ll do it your way. Next MDN, everyone knows,” I mumble.

  “Agreed.”

  “I’ll make it up to you, promise.”

  “I’ll hold you to that. And when we finally let the ‘secret’ out, we’ll talk about you moving in.”

  “Shaw!”

  “Don’t say another word. I’ve agreed to too much already. Now is when you kiss me, declare your devotion, and spend the next fifteen minutes convincing me I wasn’t just cock-blocked by my baby brother.”

  “Oh, I can assure you, your baby brother will never block your cock. But, after today, let’s never mention the two in the same sentence again.”

  She starts to nibble on my ear and kiss her way down my jaw. Then she shocks the hell out of me, erasing all coherent thoughts. “When we get home tonight, I’ll finally have access to all my lingerie… Maybe it will finally get some use.”

  This night has taken a turn for shit. I sit in Bizzy’s living room, cramped in her shitty armchair, watching Nick and Claire look at her pictures. If it were up to me, we’d have ditched everyone the moment we walked into her apartment, but Nick had other ideas. He wanted to discuss the game yesterday, never being dissuaded when I explained we watched every second of it. Then Claire showed up with bags of take-out.

  I’d have fallen for her best friend slash interested routine until she took one look at my scowl. She darted her eyes between Bizzy and me for a good ten seconds before settling down and insisting Bizzy upload the pictures to her computer so she could see them better. I knew, she was testing me. It was hard to swallow my aggravation until I saw Bizzy’s excitement. She gave me a knowing look, and I relented, sitting in the chair, while she gave a rundown of the weekend, minus the sex, the intimacy, and the declaration of love.

  Nick whoops, standing proud, when Bizzy tells about her meeting with Darren and his reaction to last year’s game. Mathis comes over, handing me a beer and nudges me, jerking his head to the back porch.

  No one gives us a second glance when we walk out, too involved in Bizzy’s stories.

  “What’s up?” I don’t waste time when we get outside.

  “You went for it.”

  I look behind me to make sure Nick is occupied then turn back to my brother’s questioning eyes.

  “Yeah, you got a problem?”

  “No, she looks happy. Happier than I’ve ever seen her. So did you, before Claire came storming in here.”

  “She’s a nut.”

  “She’s a hot nut.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding me? You have a thing for the nutcase nurse?”

  He shrugs and gives me a look of indecision. “We’re not talking about me. We’re talking about you.”

  “Bizzy wants to keep us quiet, ease Nick into it. She’s concerned about his reaction.”

  “Why?”

  “Fuck knows. If it was up to me, we’d be moving her in tomorrow.”

  Mathis chokes mid-sip and spews his beer everywhere. “What the fuck? Move her in?”

  “Hell yeah.”

  “Are you insane?”

  “In a way. I’m insane about her. She’s worried about Nick.”

  “Understandable. He’s going to go ape shit.”

  “He’ll get over it.”

  “He’ll only get over it if you’re serious.”

  “I’ve never been more serious in my life.”

  He stares at me, searching for something, then his face breaks into a wide, cocky grin. “I’ll be damned.”

  “Yep,” is the only response I give.

  “Must have been some resort, to turn the notorious jackass who’s never uttered the word commitment into a fully taken man.”

  “It’s not the resort. It’s the woman, you dumb fuck.”

  “Huh, I’ll have to remember that.” He takes another swig of his beer, still smiling.

  “So are you satisfied or do you want to gossip some more?”

  “I’m done, for now. But why don’t you fill me in on the actual business side of the trip?”

  The door opens, and Nick comes out rolling his eyes. “What are you two talking about? Hopefully something more interesting than breaking down the hotness factor of Joe Palos, Perry Carver, and Darren Jackson.”

  A low, throaty, rumble escapes, and Mathis starts to cough to cover my jealousy. “Shaw was telling me about the weekend.” He shoots me a look, telling me to get it together.

  I glance over my shoulder and catch Bizzy watching me through the window. She purses her lips, trying to hide her amusement. I raise an eyebrow and give a slight nod to let her know it’s not funny.

  She throws her head back laughing, and Claire starts shaking her finger at me. It takes all the willpower I have not to stalk to her, throw her over my shoulder, and haul her to her bedroom, showing her exactly how I feel about her discussing the ‘hotness factor’ of other men. Especially the same men who took every opportunity to razzle me by flirting their asses off with her.

  The thought of teaching her a lesson and showing just how possessive I am sends a message to
my dick, which starts to twitch. Images of her writhing under me as I fuck her until she begs for mercy, then pounding every thought of other men out of her head, play through my mind.

  My tongue darts out, licking my lower lip and pinning her with my eyes. As if she knows every dirty thought flowing through my mind, she stops laughing, and her face starts to flush.

  Oh yeah, I’m definitely—

  “Shaw, did you hear me?” Nick’s irritated voice breaks me out of my sexual haze.

  “Nope, I was thinking about work,” I lie, turning to him. “It’s going to be a bitch this week.”

  “I’d think you’d be the golden boy for at least a month with the clients you just landed.”

  “Well, now the real work begins.” I focus on my brothers and explain the upcoming contracts that need to be drafted, the change of representation press releases, and the initial outreach to endorsement holders to explain the changes. Not to mention my current roster of clients.

  We talk for a while longer and eventually join Bizzy and Claire back in the house. I almost kiss Mathis when he finally decides it’s time to go. Since he’s my ride, I force myself to leave, whispering in Bizzy’s ear that I’ll be back soon. Tonight, we’re staying at her house. She nods, flushed again, and moves out of my hug to walk us all out.

  It kills me when we drive away, but I know in less than one hour, I’ll have her again.

  Naked and calling my name. The bed, the wall, the sofa… Oh yeah, all of it sounds good.

  Chapter 10

  Bizzy

  I make my last note, close the patient chart, and stack it with the others, then drop my head down on the desk. It’s been a long shift filled with highs and lows. My heart aches as I remember Nurse Evie sitting down next to me in the lounge on my first break. It was obvious something was wrong, so I braced for the worst. When she told me Grady wasn’t responding to the small amounts of natural medicines, I knew there was no more hope.

  Hearing the news reconfirmed why I became a nurse. So I spent a little more time with each child, telling jokes, playing cards, and coloring pictures. It was as much for them as it was for me. I needed the time with them, knowing there was a level of pain and discomfort, but at the same time, a sliver of hope in their eyes.

  It took every bit of energy I had to finish the charting, and I wish I could snap my fingers and be home, in bed, and preferably with Shaw holding me.

  “You’re supposed to come back from vacation rested, you look terrible.” Claire plops down beside me and lays her head on her arms.

  “I probably should have slept yesterday, but I couldn’t. Now, I’m paying for it. I’ll bounce back. Another shift should do it.”

  “I brought clothes. I’m coming home with you.”

  “Okay.”

  “We’re sleeping for at least six hours.”

  “Sounds good,” I mumble.

  “Then you’re going to tell me every single detail of your weekend.”

  “Thought I already did that.”

  “I want the scandalous stuff. Don’t think you’re getting off that easy. Although, by the look of you when you started this shift, I’d say you’ve been ‘getting off’ a lot with Shaw Bennett.” She cackles at her own joke, and I jump out of my chair, making sure no one heard her.

  Unfortunately, no such luck. Nurse Evie is less than five feet away. She covers her mouth too late to disguise her grin. The corners of her eyes crinkle when she gives a little laugh.

  “SHHHH! Will you lower your voice?” I slap Claire’s arm.

  “Ow! What’s your problem?”

  “I’m not ready to announce our relationship yet,” I hiss.

  All humor disappears from her expression. “You can’t be serious. Why the hell not?”

  I glance at my watch and see we have ten more minutes before the shift ends, so I motion for her to follow me. When we get into the nurse’s lounge, I give a silent thanks we’re alone. Then I proceed to explain my logic of being secretive about our relationship.

  Instead of the look of understanding I was expecting, her face morphs into a look of horror. She crosses her arms, staying silent and glaring.

  “What?”

  “That is the most asinine and juvenile idea you’ve ever had in your life. You are an adult and free to date whomever you want. Nicky may be shocked, but he would be an idiot to get upset. He loves you both and will be over the moon happy.”

  “But what if something happens and this goes wrong? It’s still so fresh and new. The novelty may wear off soon, and I’d rather not have the awkwardness.”

  “For the love of God! Can’t you let yourself feel happiness for once? You’ve wanted this for as long as I’ve known you. Don’t ruin this because of stupid insecurities. Why can’t you see yourself the way we all do?”

  “I’m not being insecure. I’m being cautious.”

  “Bullfuckingshit,” she deadpans, staring a hole into me.

  “Seriously, Claire, I’m totally comfortable with myself. I’ve left the past in the past.”

  “Start acting like it. I saw the way that man looked at you the other night. I felt the intensity of his feelings the second I walked through the door.”

  “It’s still new.” I try to remain strong.

  “How does Shaw feel?”

  “Not happy,” I admit.

  “Damn, Bizzy, for someone who claims to love your friends so much, you really don’t give us much credit.”

  “That’s not true!”

  “Okay, how’s this for a scenario? What if the situation was reversed? What if Nicky met someone special and kept it from you?”

  “Not even the same thing. This is his oldest brother. He adores Shaw, always has. If this turns out to be nothing, I don’t want to cause strife between them.” My argument sounds stupid slipping from my lips.

  “That’s ridiculous! How long do you plan to keep this a secret?”

  Her words slam into me, sending a chill down my spine. “You make it sound so dirty.”

  “No, that’s the way you are making it sound. You’re not being fair to anyone in this situation, and I personally can’t believe you.”

  “Why are you being so nasty about this?” I grip the back of a chair as guilt floods through me. “I need you to be on my side. Maybe show some understanding.”

  “There are a lot of roles I take as your best friend and one of them is to tell you when you’re being an idiot. This is one of those times. Shaw’s not the kind of man that stays hidden. Hell, he was practically shooting laser beams full of sexual tension in the room the other night. Each time he looked at you, it was as if you were the only one he could see with all of us there. There’s so much chemistry, I got turned on. You’re making a mistake here, one you can’t come back from.”

  Her words hang in the air then hit me full force. She’s right.

  I love Shaw, love him in a way that will never ever be replaced. Even if things between us don’t work out, I’ll always have him in my life. He’s a part of my past and hopefully my future.

  “Being discreet about our relationship is ludicrous,” I admit out loud.

  “Hell yeah, it is.” Claire waves her hands in the air. “Thank God, I got through your thick head. You can thank me by introducing me to Perry Carver when he’s in town.”

  I grab one of her hands, yanking her into me, and blow a loud raspberry on her cheek. She tries to push me away, but I hold tighter. She smacks me playfully on the back, mumbling about being a stubborn ass and getting the hell off her. We both stop moving when a throat clears behind us. I’m prepared to face any number of doctors or nurses we work with scowling at us.

  Instead, I turn and my heart drops to the floor. Shaw is standing, propped against the doorframe, watching us with a smirk on his handsome face. My knees go weak as I take him in. He’s dressed for work in a black suit and no tie, his shirt open at the neck and showing off his tan skin against the stark white of hi
s shirt.

  My mouth starts to water as I ogle him shamelessly.

  “Fuck, it’s getting hot in here.” Claire nudges me, breaking my stare, and fans herself dramatically.

  “I was thinking the same thing,” Shaw comments.

  “I’ll get my things and meet you at the desk.” Claire breezes by, leaving us alone.

  “Hey, what are you doing here?”

  “I brought you some breakfast. Thought I’d take you home before I head into the office. Evie told me you two had snuck off in here, so I came to find you.”

  “That was really sweet.” I walk to him and rise on my toes to kiss the underside of his jaw. “You didn’t have to do that.”

  He leans down and kisses me again then tugs at my ponytail, urging my face to his. “How was your first shift back?”

  “Long, but good.”

  “I missed you last night.”

  “Missed you, too.”

  “Didn’t sleep for shit.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “You ready for me to take you home?”

  “What about my car?”

  “I’ll bring you back at seven.”

  “Claire’s coming with us. She’s gonna crash at my apartment and wants details of our weekend.”

  “What kind of details?”

  “You know, dresses, dinners, and dreams coming true…”

  His thumb brushes gently across my chin, barely touching my bottom lip. “I like the sound of this conversation.”

  “I want to tell Nicky, and everyone,” I blurt out and watch his face closely. He doesn’t show surprise; instead, his lips tip up in a mischievous grin.

  “Good thing I invited my brothers and parents to dinner Saturday night.”

  “You didn’t.”

  “Absolutely did.”

  “What about waiting? You promised me we’d do this my way.”

  “We did, and by the time Saturday rolls around, it’ll be almost a week since I got my first taste of the sweetest pus—”

  I cover his mouth and peek over his shoulder to make sure we’re still alone. “Stop.”

  He opens his mouth, touching his tongue to my fingers, and my body zings to life. All exhaustion is gone, and I wish like hell we were at home, so I could show him exactly how much I want him right now.