by Alexa Davis
My blood ran cold. Was she serious? I shook my head from side to side as I tried to work out what her crazy motivation might be. Why the hell would she want to be anywhere near my family ever again?
“No, I don’t think…”
“Look, Adam.” Mom’s tone was firm now. “If Lindsey has agreed to give this another try, then I think you should, too. Now, I’m just going to use the bathroom then I’ll come back to make us all a pot of tea. I would love to spend more time with Lindsey now we can actually talk. It’s always been a bit chaotic before.”
“That’s one way of putting it,” I sneered as she left the room. Then I turned to face Lindsey head on and I searched her face intently with my eyes. “Are you sure about this? You do realize what you’re getting yourself in for, don’t you?”
She giggled and nodded with the most serene smile on her face I’d ever seen. It appeared she had gone crazy, after all. “I don’t mind. It was really nice of your mother to come all the way out here to invite us, don’t you? She apologized when she wasn’t even in the wrong.”
“It’s never been my mother that’s the problem. It’s the rest of them,” I warned. “I don’t want you to think that Christmas day with my family will be a nice affair because it won’t be. It’ll be irritating, stressful, and unpleasant.”
She took my hand in hers and smiled once more. “Yes, but it’ll be better than being alone.”
And there it was. The ultimate shut down. I couldn’t exactly say anything else after that, could I? She had no one. Even if I didn’t like who I had, I wasn’t alone. I nodded slowly, accepting Lindsey’s decision, however much I didn’t like it. Usually, I tried to do all that I wanted to do. I didn’t want to think too much about what others wanted, but for Lindsey, it seemed that I was willing to break that rule.
“Fine, but I’m warning you that you won’t come out of it with any Christmas spirit at all. It’ll suck it right out of you.”
“I never have it, anyway.” She shrugged determinedly, giving me a glimpse of that delicious fire again. “That won’t be an issue.”
I was beat. She had me in a bind. Lindsey had won. I shrugged in defeat and moved to put the kettle on. I wouldn’t be involved in the next lot of conversation so I might as well make the tea. Mother would only focus on Lindsey now, and that was fine by me.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Lindsey
Tuesday
There was something of a skip in my step when I arrived back at the apartment. I was flying on air. I probably had a wide grin spread across my face like a mad person but I didn’t care. I was happy, falling, desperately in trouble but I really didn’t care.
“Hey, Denise, what’cha doing?” My smile faltered only slightly when I saw that she had suitcases piled up at the front door. “Are you going somewhere?”
She huffed and rolled her eyes at me. “Have you forgotten? I’m going home for Christmas. I’ve been trying to call you to see if you want to come, but your cell phone has been off for nearly two days.”
“Oh, yeah.” I giggled, I just couldn’t help myself. “I’ve been out and my phone died.”
“Out for days?” Denise gave me a disbelieving look. “That isn’t like you at all. Where the hell have you been?”
I blushed but the words spilled out of my mouth anyway. I couldn’t control myself I was so happy that I felt compelled to share. “I was at Adam’s house. Things have taken a very positive direction.”
“Positive?” Denise didn’t look impressed as she grabbed her purse. “You mean you slept with him? Is that really a good idea? Didn’t I warn you that this will end up being a whole lot of trouble?”
I could see why she’d think that way if I wanted to look at things from her point of view but I didn’t want my bubble burst. I wanted to relish in this post orgasmic bliss for a little while longer. For a lot longer, actually. It felt wonderful. I was the happiest that I’d been in a really long time.
“I know what you think, Denise, but trust me. I know what I’m doing.” She thought I was naïve, I could see it in her eyes. I needed to lie just a little bit so she thought I was telling the truth. “I know that this might not work out, but I also know that things are good for the moment. It didn’t happen on a night when any money exchanged hands, so it isn’t weird. It’s just…” There was that grin again, I just couldn’t control it. “I’m just having a really good time at the moment. That’s all.”
“Did you want to come for Christmas then, or not?” She ignored my point and tried to drag me away from the city for a break from it all. I guess she assumed that was what I needed. “I’ve told Mom you might…”
“I’m going to Adam’s parents’ house for Christmas dinner. His mom invited me as way of an apology.”
“Are you serious?” Denise flung her arms out in utter despair at me. “Don’t you see how messed up this is? Now you’re hanging out over the holidays – you are putting yourself in the dangerous path of falling in love.”
I know that… I don’t think I mind.
Of course, I couldn’t say that aloud, so I went for something different instead. “I know that, I’m not foolish. I’m just taking each day as it comes until it ends.”
She cocked her head to one side and she stepped closer to me. “Lindsey, I just care about you, you know that. You need a break from this. You need to come home with me for the holidays to get some distance. Try to work out how you really feel about all of this. Maybe with some perspective, you’ll see that this isn’t as straightforward as you think.” She breathed deeply as if she was really trying to keep her emotions locked away. “Maybe this thing between you and Adam can work, even if I don’t think it can. Maybe I’m wrong, but I just think the smartest thing to do would be to give the pair of you a bit of a break.”
Maybe she was right. Maybe I did need that – but it wasn’t what I wanted. Usually I did the right thing, but this was the one time that I really didn’t want to. I just wanted to bathe in this incredible feeling and to have it last for as long as it could. It wasn’t smart, but I didn’t want to be smart.
“I’m going to stay,” I told her firmly. “And, I’m going to have Christmas dinner with Adam’s family. I want to. I promise you, I’ll be fine.”
Her mouth tightened as she grabbed her things. “Fine. I can see that you have your mind made up. I guess I’ll just get going then.”
As she stomped towards the door in a fit of anger, I realized that I couldn’t let her go like this. The last thing I wanted was for me and Denise to spend Christmas on bad terms. It’d be too long until we saw one another again and things could sour.
“Denise, don’t leave yet.” I thought on my feet, trying desperately to get her to stay. “I know you don’t like it, but it’ll be fine. I know what I’m doing. Let me take you to lunch before you go.” She folded her arms across her chest, looking very unimpressed, but she didn’t leave which I decided to push that little bit further. “Come on, we’ll go to that bakery where the hot guy works. Maybe today will be the day you get his number.”
“Fine,” she conceded unhappily. Her facial expression said it all. She didn’t want to, but she didn’t want to spend Christmas with us fallen out either. “But you’re paying, you realize that, right? I know you can afford to these days, what with your fancy ass job.”
I ignored the malice there. I let Denise get her little dig in – it was clearly what she needed right now. Thankfully, she was staying so I knew for a fact that we would be able to sort this out. “Yes, I’m paying. Come on, let’s go.”
***
I chuckled to myself as I watched Denise overtly flirt with the hot guy behind the counter. She had no shame as she leant across to him, revealing her cleavage and laughed at all his jokes in a cutsey hair flipping way. Why he wasn’t responding I would never know, but that was the mystery of men. Why he wouldn’t want the super sexy Denise and why Adam wanted me… I would never understand.
Quite frankly, it was a relief when sh
e gave up and she joined me at the table. At first, I thought the look of resignation on her face was about him, but then she spoke again and I realized perhaps not.
“So, I suppose you better tell me about you and Adam,” she grumbled. “I might not like it, but I best know all the details before things get way out of hand. Is he still a bum with no job?”
“He isn’t, actually,” I declared proudly. “He volunteers at the orphanage, so that takes up too much time for him to do anything else. He’s a good man, he gives so much of himself…”
“He volunteers?” she scoffed, much to my surprise. “How the hell does that pay the bills?”
“Oh, well…” I wasn’t sure how to answer that. “He doesn’t need to, does he?”
“Oh that’s right: Daddy’s money. How could I forget.” She rolled her eyes and ate a huge slice of cake. The she continued to talk, despite the fact that her mouth was full. “Come on, Lindsey, don’t you want more for yourself? Someone with a bit of ambition.”
“I don’t think working at an orphanage is a bad thing,” I shot back rapidly. “I think he’s doing something really good. I know what it’s like to have no parents, remember?”
That shut Denise up but I could tell that she still thought the same thing. She assumed I should want someone whose main goal in life was to make money – clearly that was what she wanted for herself, but that wasn’t me. I didn’t think it had ever been me, but now I knew that with utter certainty, more than ever before. I wanted someone with heart, with integrity, someone that wanted to give back. That was Adam, I just knew it.
He had opened my eyes to all sorts. I now knew myself better just from spending time with him. He gave me a confidence in myself that wasn’t there before. I wouldn’t give that up for anything.
“Look, that’s what he does, and like I said before I’m happy with him. I just want to keep things as they are. I like that he volunteers, I’ve seen what he does to make the kids lives better. I honestly do know what I’m doing.”
Denise sat back in her chair and she regarded me closely. I really didn’t want this to end in a fight, not when things were finally back on track. I just wanted this to be done. I always accepted Denise for her choices, why couldn’t she do the same for mine?
“You don’t have to keep seeing him for money, you’ve got enough to pay the rent for ages now. Please don’t keep spending time with him for that.”
I shook my head fast. “No, I won’t. This isn’t about the whole fake girlfriend anymore. It’s all about me and him. I won’t take another penny from him.”
I hoped that would be the end of it, and when she changed the subject right back to the hot guy at the counter, I let out a breath that I hadn’t even realized I was holding. At least with random small talk, nothing could escalate. Like she already said, Denise didn’t have to accept me with Adam; there was no part of her that had to like it. She just needed to let it go until whatever would come next. Whether it was good or bad, I hoped she would be there for me.
Eventually the time came where we had to go back to the apartment so Denise could get her things and go. By the time that happened, the atmosphere had completely changed again. She was much more jovial, which allowed me to relax, as well.
“I guess I’ll see you soon then,” she said while wrapping her arms around me. “You just be careful. Look after yourself over the Christmas break and don’t let yourself get in too deep, okay?”
“Sure, sure,” I chuckled. “And you take care of yourself, too, although not too much. I want to hear all about your drunken escapades. That always cheers me up come New Year.”
“There’s bound to be some.” She winked at me playfully while putting her hand on her hip and striking a sexy pose for me. I couldn’t help but laugh at her silliness. “And maybe some sexy stories to tell, as well.”
I hoped that I’d have some sexy stories of my own – not that I would tell them. I wasn’t really the kiss and tell type, not even with my best friend. God, I wanted to get my hands on that amazing body of his again. Adam was something else, he was on a completely other scale. Those muscles, those shoulders, everything about him was phenomenal. I just wanted to touch him.
“Yeah, I hope so! Have a good time and I’ll see you soon.”
As she walked away and closed the apartment door behind her, I didn’t feel as locked away and alone as I normally did at this time of year. For the first time in a very long time, I had plans that I was actually looking forward to. Sure it would probably be awkward and incredibly uncomfortable with Adam’s father and brother there, but at least I’d be with him. That was really all I cared about. I could suffer the arguments and the crappy moods as long as I got to be with him.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Adam
Wednesday
I just stepped out of the shower when I heard it. At first I assumed it was in my mind, that I was simply hearing things or that it was just the house settling itself again, but it quickly became obvious that wasn’t the case, at all. There was someone knocking at the door, and judging by the way they were petering out they’d been going on for a while.
“Just coming, hold on!” I called out while grabbing onto the nearest tee shirt. I didn’t have time to get pants, too so I wrapped the towel tightly around my waist to cover up my bottom half. I wasn’t sure how decent I was but I didn’t want to keep whoever it was waiting any longer. “Be right there.”
I pulled the door open and smiled at the face standing on the other side of it. It was a surprise, but a very pleasant one. “Hello there,” she said playfully, holding out a box of chocolates. “Just thought I’d drop by unexpectedly and give you these.”
I loved that Lindsey was ballsy enough to just turn up out of the blue, confident enough in herself to believe that I liked her. She wasn’t arrogant about it, she just understood that this was something. If she didn’t, she probably would have messaged me beforehand. I was glad that she didn’t, I wanted her to be comfortable.
“Why, thank you.” I took the box from her. “Do you want to come inside? I’m just about to head out to the orphanage for the day, but you’re more than welcome to come in until then.”
A part of me considered not going into the orphanage today to spend time with Lindsey instead, but I hadn’t ever let the kids down before, and I didn’t want to start now.
As Lindsey followed me inside, I wondered if she knew how naked I was underneath my towel. The idea that she might whip it down before seducing me sent an excitable thrill racing up and down my spine. I feared if I kept thinking along those lines I might spring to attention and show her without the need to whip anything down.
I didn’t want to be inappropriate, but if she initiated it, I sure as hell wasn’t going to turn her down.
“I wanted to talk to you about that actually… Would you mind if I came with you again?” she asked me coyly. “I had a really awesome time last time.”
“Oh right, of course you can come.” I smiled to myself, glad that she wanted to. The kids loved her and wanted her around and I sure as hell did too. It was always fun at the orphanage, brightening up the kid’s days, but with Lindsey by my side that would be even better. “That would be cool. Are you sure you didn’t have anything better to do?”
“Than hang out with you? No, of course not,” she told me playfully. I loved the teasing in her tone, it was sweet and alluring. “Only if you’re sure you want me.”
“Well, there’s always playing to do and cooking, too. I won’t turn down the world class chef that you are.”
She rolled her eyes and chuckled at me. “Alright, no need to be like that about it. I’ll help you cook, but I’m making no promises about the quality of what I’ll produce.”
“Maybe I’ll keep you out the kitchen then.” I squeezed her arm playfully. “I’m just going to get dressed. I’ll be back in a minute.”
As I pulled my clothes on I grinned to myself with sheer happiness. I couldn’t believe how well things wer
e going with me and Lindsey, I was so damn lucky. Things could have gotten really awkward really fast between us after all that had happened, but it hadn’t.
Once I got back into the kitchen, Lindsey was looking at her phone, completely oblivious to the rest of the world. I watched her for a while with my shoulder leaned up against the doorframe. Her expression and face were so beautiful when she didn’t think anyone was looking at her. She had an angelic appearance. Of course, I also enjoyed the devilish side of her.
Stop that, I warned myself. Today we have a job to do. This isn’t a day for that.
Eventually she sensed me looking up at her and her eyes met mine. There was no denying the bolt in my chest as we connected. I coughed and pushed myself upwards as I realized my cheeks were reddening. She was making me feel all kinds of things that I hadn’t before and I liked it a lot. Sure it was scary, but I didn’t want to focus too much on the fear. I just wanted to enjoy the moment while it lasted.
“Are you ready to get going?” I nodded towards the front door. I needed to move before I lost my mind and devoured her whole. “The bacon won’t cook itself.”
“I thought I wasn’t allowed in the kitchen!” She grinned and jumped up, while shoving her phone into her bag once more. “Let’s get going.”
As she walked towards the door I couldn’t stop myself from staring at her ass. That girl looked damn good as she walked away from me. I couldn’t believe there was ever a time when I believed we didn’t have any chemistry. It sizzled between us all the time. I must have been in denial. I couldn’t have missed it, it was intense. The most powerful sensation in the world. It threatened to consume me whole if I let it.
Well now that I was aware of it, I couldn’t ignore it again!
***
“Are you singing?” Lindsey asked me in a shocked tone as she came up behind me in the kitchen, where despite all my protests I’d ended up letting her in willingly. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard you sing before.”