Marti Talbott's Highlander Series, Volume 5
Page 8
All they could do was look for a sign that Dolee had passed that way and there simply was no sign. The men spread out, drew in close together in the narrower parts of the meadows or valleys and spread out again, each taking a section of land and each watching the ground for something—anything that might tell them Dolee had come that way.
Ros occasionally glanced at a worried Camran, but there was little he could say or do to reassure the man. They dared not call her name for fear they might draw the wrong kind of attention to Dolee. So for the most part they just followed Nessa, kept an eye out for warriors from other clans and searched.
By the time they stopped for the night, Nessa was exhausted. She spread her plaid by the small campfire, sat down, pulled the bread Edana packed for her out of her sack and began to nibble. As soon as Ros sat down on his plaid not far away, she looked at him. “Dolee might have ignored my advice and gone straight across the Kennedy hold. If she came this way we would have caught up with her by now.”
“She had a good head start, we will find her tomorrow.”
Nessa nodded, but she blamed herself. If she had gone to Neil sooner, they surely would have found Dolee by now. She took another bite of bread, wrapped it back up in the cloth and then put it back in her sack. It seemed to take the last of her strength to chew and swallow. Her eyes drooped and her head fell forward just before Ros caught her arm, helped her lay down, and then covered her with her extra plaid.
THE NEXT THING SHE knew, it was morning and Camran was shaking her awake. “It is cloudy.”
She tried, but could not quite understand. “What?”
“It is cloudy and Dolee has no sense of direction. We must find her soon or she will be lost to us forever.”
Nessa quickly sat up and began to gather her things. She tried not to notice the terror in Camran’s eyes or the concern on the faces of the other men. She let Ros help her on her horse, but did not wait for him to mount before she urged her horse onward. If Camran felt it was urgent, then she felt it too.
Two hours went by before they stopped on the crest of a hill to see if they could spot Dolee. Nessa slid down off her horse. It felt good to stretch her legs and she too searched the land below with her eyes until Ros came to stand beside her. “Why do you think she took two horses?”
“I find it comforting that she did. Both had provisions and knowing she has food and water is a comfort,” he answered.
“I did tell her it would take at least two days going and two coming back. Perhaps she thought she would need that much.” Nessa turned to look in another direction. The trees were not as thick in this part of the forest and over the tops she could see a range of far off mountains. “I am so frightened for her and I fear finding her is hopeless.”
He wanted to hold her and give her his strength, but this was not the time or the place. “It is not hopeless and you must not think it. Camran will see if you give up and you must be strong for his sake.”
“You are right, of course. I recognize those mountains and we should turn south now. The Kennedys will not bother us here.”
NESSA WAS WRONG AND more than once, the MacGreagors hid in the woods to let a band of Kennedy warriors pass by. Then the MacGreagors moved on. Again they searched and again they saw nothing. But the terrain was beginning to look more familiar to Nessa and it was a relief to know she was leading them in the right direction. She did not say so, but the thought of getting them all lost weighed heavy on her mind. Now she could relax a little. By afternoon, the clouds drifted away and Camran seemed relieved, which also helped her relax.
When they stopped again, she knelt at the edge of a stream and splashed water on her face. Then she cupped her hands, drank and dried her face with her cloth. It was exactly the kind of refreshment she needed.
Camran had been quite for most of the day, but there was a question on his mind, “Nessa, do you believe the widow Kennedy could truly tell Dolee if she were to have children?”
She stood up and turned to look at Dolee’s husband. “I did, but not after Millin explained it to me.”
Camran offered his hand and helped her walk over the rocks until she was away from the stream. “What did Millin say?”
“Well, I was very young when I went to see the widow Kennedy. After my mother passed, I wanted to be certain she was in heaven. Widow Kennedy read the water rings and assured me she was. But Millin says a soothsayer can make the rings say whatever the person wants to hear. Who would know the difference?”
Camran nodded. “Millin is right.”
“I see that now.” Suddenly she did not know what to say. She thought to apologize again, but he surely did not want to hear it. She thought to offer some words of hope, but she feared he might find her feeble attempt insincere. So when he walked away, she let him go without a word and felt guilty for doing it. If only she could take back everything she told Dolee.
NESSA WAS PAYING VERY little attention to him, but Ros kept a close eye on her. Besieged by each of the sisters before they left, he faithfully promised to bring her back safe and sound. But that was not the reason for his attentions. She was perhaps not the most beautiful of the sisters, but she was by all accounts the most intelligent and he liked her...he liked her a lot.
When the sisters first came to live with the MacGreagor Clan they were constantly surrounded by men wanting their attention, so Ros did not even try. One by one the elder sisters married and then the English brides arrived and Nessa’s attention was not in such demand. But getting her to pay attention to him was more of a chore than he realized until a month ago. Finally, she seemed to realize he was alive and now they were together, often riding side by side, albeit for a very unhappy reason. On a more fitting occasion, he would have been pleased indeed.
He did not show it, but he was as unsettled by not having found Dolee by now as Nessa was. And as concerned as he was for Dolee, he was beginning to worry almost as much about the growing despair in Nessa’s eyes. It was easy to see she blamed herself and there was little he could do about it.
Not good at concealing her feelings, Nessa’s expressions gave her thoughts away and Ros had learned in just a short time when she needed to stop. But she would not allow him to stop for her often and instead kept them moving. She was determined Dolee was not going to die just because she was tired. By the time they halted for the second night and the men began to fall asleep around the campfire, she was so distraught and weary, all she seemed able to do was stare into the embers of the fire.
Her eyes were shifting and Ros feared she was going over all the horrible things that might have happened to Dolee, so he tried to distract her. “Do you miss your father and brothers?”
She looked at him and rolled her eyes, “Does a cow miss a pesky fly?” She enjoyed the laughter in his eyes and smiled. “We cannot be very far away from my father’s home now.”
“Are you afraid of them?”
“Nay, they are afraid of us. However, I would not wish to see my father again or talk to my brothers. They sold us, you know.”
“I heard that.”
“Slade found us, brought us to the MacGreagors and we are happy. I do not believe our lives would be half so good, if Slade had not agreed to take us with him that day in the woods.”
“Can you sleep now?” Just as he hoped, distracting Nessa helped and when she nodded and then turned to stretch out on her plaid, he covered her and stayed until she was asleep.
Even in her sleep, the worry lines did not completely leave her brow.
CHAPTER VII
MORNING DID NOT COME so early, nor was Nessa awakened so urgently as the day before. On this morning, the sky was again clear and the directions were easy to discern by the placement of the sun. Dolee would be able to tell east from west even if she happened to get turned around. The question was, did she happen to get so turned around the day before, that she went a considerable distance in the wrong direction altogether?
Suddenly, Scotland was way too big.
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nbsp; Again, they searched, again there was no sign of Dolee. They were traveling well out of the forest and into the relatively barren land of Nessa’s youth. As they rode past the cottage, the sheds and the corrals of her father, Nessa saw no one at all and the sheep and cattle were gone. She breathed easer and moved on without pointing it out to any of the men. It was a life happily left behind. She thought about stopping to put flowers on her mother’s grave, but she decided against it. The last thing Camran needed was to look upon a grave.
The MacGreagors rounded the loch, and the number of hills from the loch to the Widow Kennedy’s house numbered only two instead of three or four. But there were no horses tied in front of the cottage and the old woman sat alone in a chair outside.
The sight of twenty men wearing unfamiliar plaids might frighten the old woman, Nessa thought, so she slipped down off her horse and walked the rest of the way up the hill alone. Though still alert of mind, the widow looked considerably older than Nessa remembered. Her cottage was aged and weather beaten, which was something Nessa had not noticed before.
Nessa spoke to her in soft tones and then did the hardest thing she had ever had to do—she turned to look at Camran, shook her head and watched him lower his eyes. The Widow Kennedy had not seen Dolee. In fact, she had not seen another human being in a fortnight. Nessa thanked her, promised to come back again someday and then walked back down the hill.
Her heart hurt for Camran but when she returned to the men and remounted her horse, she hid her feelings. “That loch we passed has a good number of fish begging to be caught. Perhaps we got ahead of her. Perhaps we should stay at least until morning and wait for her.”
Slowly, Camran nodded. He followed Nessa back to the loch, dismounted and then aimlessly looked out across the water. He tried not to think the worst, but even he knew the longer it took to find his wife, the less likely she was still alive. The men tried to get him interested in fishing, but he declined and walked to the top of a nearby hill to see if he could spot her. Too soon, the sun would set.
Nessa watched him from below, hoping for a shout or a signal of some kind. So intense were her hopes, she did not notice that Ros was standing right beside her again, where he always seemed to be. She had not forgotten her attraction to him, but she had set it aside. Yet when she finally noticed, his nearness sent unexpected excitement through her veins.
“It is not your fault,” Ros said.
Nessa let out a forgotten breath and closed her eyes, “Why did she do it? She said she would have her husband take her.”
“Dolee kept taking potions that made her sick and Camran forbid her to take any more. She was well aware he would not bring her.”
“Then it is my fault. She asked if the Widow Kennedy had bottles and I said she did, though I did not know what they were for.”
“You could not have known she would go alone.”
“Nay, but if I had not mentioned this place she would not have tried to find it. Alison is right, I am witless.”
Said Ros, “All brothers and sisters think the others are witless.”
Nessa was not really listening. Instead, she watched Camran finally give up looking and bow his head. It made her want to cry. “Is there no way to ease his pain?”
“If there were, I would have done it by now.”
“Dolee loves him very much, she told me so.”
“Perhaps later you should tell him that. He might need to hear her words if we do not find her.”
Nessa finally took her eyes off Camran and turned to Ros. “We will not stop looking, will we?”
“We will not and you need not worry about that. When we go back, we will go straight and we will find her.”
“I do so pray you are right.” Nessa allowed herself just a moment to look deep into his eyes, then she walked back to take her sack off her horse, open it and spread her plaid.
The men who fished caught enough to feed them, men built a fire and tended the cooking while still others took turns standing guard. They were out in the open with no trees to hide behind, but at least they could see someone coming from a good distance away.
Nessa tried to relax so she could sleep, but when the fire began to diminish, she got worried and got back up. She looked for Ros, spotted him talking to the guards and hurried to him. “You must build a bigger fire and keep it burning all night.”
Ros started to ask where she suggested they get that much wood in this barren land, but then noticed the look of terror in her eyes. “Are you afraid the Kennedys will find us?”
“Nay, I am worried a wild boar will.”
“I see.”
“I doubt you do. They are common in this part of Scotland and not to be ignored.”
“And they are the thing you fear most in the world.”
“Aye.”
“Nessa, we are twenty men capable of protecting you even from a wild boar.” She did not look convinced and when she started to wring her hands, he took hold of them to stop her. “I will alert the lads and if it pleases you, I will put my bed next to yours. You will be safe.”
Nessa pulled her hands away and went back to her bed. She doubted they understood the danger, but there was little she could do about it. A man, even a brave man could not fully understand until he was actually face to face with an angry and determined wild boar. For the first time, she was grateful Dolee had not made it this far for she forgot to warn her about the wild boars.
SHE DID NOT THINK SHE would sleep, but when Nessa awoke the next morning, Ros was sleeping next to her as he promised. To her relief, the wild boars stayed away and to her sorrow, Dolee was yet to be found.
They packed up their things, mounted and headed into the land of the Kennedys. Again, they passed the place of her birth and this time Nessa marveled at how small their cottage was. How on earth had so many people managed to live in there?
As they had before, the men spread out and looked for signs of Dolee—broken branches, tracks and God forbid blood. With each passing hour, Camran looked older and even more pale. Nessa tried not to watch him but now that she was not leading them any longer, Camran was in front of her and she could not help but see when he slumped or took a deep breath. It was breaking her heart into tiny pieces, but she vowed not to cry. This was neither the time nor the place for self-pity.
By the noon meal it was not Camran or Dolee Ros was most worried about. Nessa barely slept the night before, did not want to eat and seemed constantly on the verge of tears. Losing one woman was more than enough to his way of thinking, so when she went off by herself for her comfort, he ordered the men to quicken their pace.
Camran ate the last bite of bread he brought with him and then turned to Ros. “Take her back; there is no need for her to be here now. I will stay behind and look for Dolee.”
Ros was not surprised when most of the men agreed to stay behind with Camran. He nodded and when Nessa came back, he explained they would be splitting up. He did not elaborate on why and was grateful she did not ask. They both now believed finding Dolee was hopeless, but neither wanted to say it out loud.
She hugged Camran, wished the men staying behind well and let Ros and two other men take her toward home. But Nessa could not stop thinking about the missing woman. Suppose Dolee’s horses got loose in the night and wandered off. She could be on foot and the forest held so many hiding places a hundred men could not see them all. Even if she still had the horses, she might have seen men wearing unfamiliar plaids, got upset and was afraid to continue on. Perhaps she fell and broke a leg, perhaps the horse threw her, or she was ill, or a man with immoral intentions got to her.
Nessa could certainly see how Neil’s edict forbidding the women to go anywhere alone was a good one. Dolee was simply gone and no one would ever come to tell them what happened to her. They might never, ever know and as hard as she tried, Nessa could not shake her fears and imaginings.
Finally, Ros insisted they stop in a small meadow to rest the horses. As soon as she dismounted, she led
her horse to a creek, let him drink his fill and then held on to the reins while he grazed on the tall grass. It was a peaceful little meadow which she found comforting. But too soon, Ros got them headed home again.
Ros was worried about her. She had not said a word and even when they stopped for the night, she was quiet. Then her mood seemed to brighten a little and she looked at him with hope in her eyes.
“Perhaps she is not lost at all. Perhaps Neil found her and is waiting for us to come home.”
Ros nodded. If it pleased Nessa to think that, then it pleased him. At least she seemed to be a little less upset now that she was not constantly watching Camran. Still, when he offered her some barley oats to eat, she again was not hungry and it concerned him. “Nessa, you must eat. If I do not bring you back healthy, your sisters will do me in.”
Nessa smiled for the first time in two days. “You should just surrender immediately. It will be less painful that way.”
“I surrendered more than a week ago, you just have not yet noticed.”
“I do not understand.”
“I did not think you did. Come with me and I will show you.” He enjoyed the perplexed look on her face. She truly had no idea what he was about to do. As soon as he got her out of sight of the other two men, he stopped, put his arms around her, drew her to him and kissed her.
But Nessa resisted and pulled away. “What are you doing?”
“I am kissing you.”
“Well I know that, but you cannot.”
“Why not?”
“Because you are...I mean, what about Emily?”
“Oh.” He let go and moved away. “That means you have noticed me.”
“Of course I have noticed you, but you are always with Emily and I thought...”
“She is not here now.”
“Nay, she is not, but I wish she were. I do not...what I mean is, if she prefers you, I would not want to hurt her.”