Love Delayed

by Love Belvin

  She pulled out her phone and showed me countless pictures of a colorless newborn and followed up the pictures with insignificant details of meeting him. With anyone else, this would have been painful to the point of my ears bleeding, but with Zo, everything was filled with wonder. She had a talent for that. I listened and dug into my plate.

  When Zoey walked me to the door, the living room was empty.

  “Thanks for dinner.” I raised my right hand. “And the gift.” I then raised my left. “This is really Christmas for me. I feel bad that it’s one-sided.”

  Zoey shook her head and whispered, “No it isn’t. Here, I’ll make it even.” And she pushed up on her toes and kissed me.

  At first it was a lingering peck, but then she came back for more and threw her tongue in the mix, twirling it, releasing a bunch of fucking butterflies in my stomach. I’d never had such a reaction to a kiss. Zoey did shit like that to me. She fucked with my head. My phone buzzed and she pulled back. Once fully on her feet, she timidly wiped her mouth as she sucked in her lips. That was a move uncharacteristic of the Zoey I knew. She never seemed to second guess herself.

  “Goodnight, Zoey.” I’d lost my voice in that kiss.

  “’Night, dork.” She smiled softly.

  I moved so she could unlock the door, then opened it.

  It was fucking hard leaving her without knowing the next time I’d see her, but I didn’t know how to address that. I still didn’t have a handle on this young girl.

  “Keep in touch,” were my last words before I left her New Brunswick home.

  I gotta get my shit together. She’s too young!

  Chapter 4

  Then

  January 2007

  Stenton

  “You meeting up at Delilah’s?” Alton asked, holding his duffle bag, about to leave.

  I turned toward my locker to grab my watch. “Nah,” I answered, not really looking at him.

  “What the fuck is up with you? You ain’t seen them golden tits and ass in months, man.” Alton’s 5’ 6” frame was facing me, awaiting a response.

  We were the last in the locker room, having had a long conversation with the coaches right after leaving the court. I was drained and just wanted to be alone with a cold brewski. I realized Alton was still there and therefore not dropping the subject, whatever the fuck it was.

  “Your point, man?” I asked, now turning to give him my undivided attention.

  His neck snapped back. “My point is what the fuck done crawled up your ass and is holding your balls? The whole crew is going to be in the building tonight. Don’t sweat the trading leads from tonight. We won. Bottom line.” He pumped his free fist. “Now let’s go celebrate with hard nipples and soft asses!”

  I chuckled. “I’m good for tonight, man.”

  My phone went off as I spoke. I grabbed it from the locker shelf and saw it was a text from Zoey. I felt a fucking million butterflies in my stomach at the sight of her name across my screen.

  Zoey: Hey! I know you’re busy in your season and all (by the way, great game tonite) but I just realized I have no winter break plans. My parents are going to a prayer conference in D.C. and asking me to attend. I’m sooooo not interested. So now I’ll be bored and alone.

  “What the fuck you smiling at? I hope that’s Erika Erceg, finally wearing your biker-boy ass down.” My head shot up at the sound of Alton’s voice. I’d totally forgotten he was there.

  “The fuck you talking about?”

  “You, fool! You smiling like a lil’ bitch at your phone, man.” Alton’s one peaked brow matched his tone.

  “Fuck outta here, man,” I rumbled as I typed back.

  Me: When exactly are you talking?

  I couldn’t believe I was considering this shit. I didn’t want to taint this girl. She was everything I wasn’t used to: smart, funny, lighthearted, fun and…fucking sexy. My Niña was so much the women who ran in my circles were not, which is why I did entertain her idea of spending time together. I’d missed her quirkiness.

  Zoey: Well when do you have off, dork?

  I found myself quietly chuckling at that.

  Me: My professional schedule is online. Is yours?

  “Man, fuck this. I’m out!” Alton huffed. “I hope that’s golden ass you arranging right now, my man.” He turned and left out the main area.

  Zoey: Hang on. Searching your schedule now…

  I finished tossing my things into my bag and made my way out of the locker room. I could now feel the smile plastered on my face. Shit!

  Seconds later, my phone pings again.

  Zoey: Christ! You have no life between October and June! So I was able to find three days in the second week of January. Do you have personal plans?

  She was determined. And I was nervous as hell. I didn’t want to fuck this up. I wanted to spend some time with her. Hell, I could see myself coming home to her every night. Hanging out for a few days meant more than she was proposing. Was it something she understood she could be getting into? Was I ready for that shit?

  Me: I do now. Send me the dates and we’ll make it happen.

  After hitting Send, I felt excitement like never before. This girl had no idea how much she got under my skin.

  Zoey: Yippee! Guess who won’t be bored the entire winter break? #Zoey! Yeah, boy!

  I laughed my ass off at the door of my car.

  Me: Wait. What are we supposed to be doing exactly?

  I couldn’t deny the anticipation. I felt like a fucking kid, talking about Christmas morning expectations.

  Zoey: Does it matter? Can’t go far because of your demanding job. I dunno. Somewhere low key because of your stalkers.

  I could see the sarcastic grin across her pouty lips. Lips that I’d been dying to touch again since Christmas. I swore to myself I wouldn’t cross the line with her. I just couldn’t resist her company. She was so cool to just chill with. Hmmm… Where could we go on the low for just a couple of days? It wasn’t until just before I was going to call it a night that I replied.

  Me: We can go out to my place in Jersey.

  ~~~~~~~~~~

  We pulled up to the gate where I scanned my card for entry. As the metal doors opened, I looked over at Zoey, who was uncharacteristically stumped. It was almost midnight. I’d picked her up as soon as I left the arena. I was uneasy about bringing her here, but with her it felt right. Zoey was cool.

  I rarely went home; I practiced so damn much, keeping me in the South Jersey/Philly area. I didn’t have all the bedrooms there furnished because no one hardly came over unless I was having a big ass summer party.

  As we rounded the fountain to get to the front of the house, I saw Zo’s jaw drop as she spied it. I parked the car and turned to see her sights were still beyond me, observing the grounds. It was hard not to focus my attention on her damn breasts that were bulging in a tight ass blouse she wearing. I’d wondered why she didn’t have her coat zipped up. And her jeans. Fuck! They looked like they were painted on. I knew she had curves, but I learned that night they weren’t as modest in clothes as I’d assumed. Her pouty lips looked dipped in gloss. I was getting cold feet again about this trip; those nervous waves had been coming every day in my stomach since I agreed to this.

  “Zo,” I called out to her.

  Her brown eyes quickly zoomed in on my face. “Hmmm?”

  I lifted a brow. “You good?”

  Her neck jerked in response to my question. Her mouth opened and closed along with her eyes. Then I saw the humor rise in them.

  “W-what? Boy, please! I done been to many mansions in Alpine! This is modest.” She rolled her eyes and turned towards the front of the house. “I just remembered that I have a tutoring call first thing in the morning.”

  She held on to her giggle for a few seconds. I shook my head and laughed at her as I got out of the car and pulled our things from the trunk. I let us inside and disarmed the security system. Then I turned to her and observed her eyes assessing the vestibule.

>   “I would show you around, but it’s pretty late. I guess we can do that in the morning.”

  Was I tired? No. My body was bursting with nervous energy. I had Zoey alone in my place and I didn’t know what to do or expect. If she were just any woman, I would be counting down the minutes to fuck her. But she’s not; she’s my little angel.

  She turned to me excitedly, damn near bouncing on her toes. “What are the sleeping arrangements?”

  I cocked my head and wrinkled my forehead, unable to hide the smirk on my face. “What do you mean?”

  Zoey slowly walked over to me and stopped just at my chest and mischievously lifted only her eyes. “What do you think I mean, dork?” Then her chin rose and I had a perfect view of her lips that parted.

  My dick got hard. Damn. I couldn’t think of her in that manner. I had to get my shit together. I backed up to grab our bags and headed for the staircase.

  “Wherever you find a bed. There are six bedrooms, but not all are furnished. Pick one and make yourself at home.” I was midway up the twenty five steps by the time I was done.

  Later that night, I changed into more comfortable clothes and posted up in the theater room. Zoey wanted to watch horror films and eat popcorn as though we were at a sleepover. Picture that. She even parted her hair into ponytails to add to the experience. It was cute.

  What was not cute was when she’d showered and changed, she met me downstairs in tiny ass retro-basketball shorts that stopped at the bottom of her ass cheeks, a tight tank t-shirt that showed the impressions of her bra, and long socks that came above her calf muscles. Upon seeing that, something hit me: Zoey wasn’t that cool, laid back beauty that I revered as cute last summer. She was still funny as hell, more aggressive, definitely cool, but undeniably sensual now. More sensual than I could trust myself to be around.

  While watching the second flick, “Resident Evil,” I realized she was damn near underneath me with her legs curled beneath her. She stopped eating her popcorn, which thankfully I did have in stock, during the first flick. Horror films didn’t do much for me. I’m more of an action buff, but I preferred this predictable shit to that fluffy romance crap. Zo seemed all into it. I looked down at her and noticed the glow from the big screen casting a bright light on her wide eyes and mouth. Her hair smelled like flowers and I could even pick up a secondary vanilla scent from her body. She was sexy as hell. But no matter how mature she looked in that moment, the way she was curled beneath me reminded me of my old Niña.

  Her head popped up and she caught me eyeing her. Our eyes locked for a minute before she wiggled into a taller position and then kissed me. Her tongue remained in her mouth, but her lips parted to pull at my lower one. I felt the hike in my breath at that move. She had to have caught it, too, because it damn sure was audible enough. Then there was that smoldering look in her eyes again. The one I’d seen the first time we’d kiss and hours ago at the front door when she’d asked about the sleeping arrangement.

  Zoey took to my mouth again. This time she did insert her tongue, swirling it around and around. She changed the angle of her face as our mouths dipped into each other’s. I commanded my hands to stay off her body, even though her perky breasts were rubbing against my chest. Even though her hands perused my chest and then abs. Her fragrance took on a new experience at this proximity. I didn’t know how long I’d be able to hold out. When Zo’s little hand slipped beneath the elasticity of my waistband, I caught her wrist and pulled my mouth back.

  “Zo, we can’t do this.” I didn’t recognize my own voice.

  Hell, I couldn’t believe she wanted me…and that my dumb ass just shut it down! My cock wanted to be buried deep inside her, proving to be the best lover she’d ever had. But something else deep within wanted to hold off on sex. I wanted to hold on to our friendship just a little longer.

  “Why not?” she asked, her eyes pleading with me.

  “B-because,” I exhaled, rubbing my face with my hands. I felt like a damn sucker because I didn’t have a legitimate answer. I couldn’t believe I felt pressured by ass; Zo’s pretty one, no less. I took another breath, willing an answer to come. And it did. “Because I don’t have any rubbers,” finally came out, sounding convincing as hell, too.

  She paused, now resting on her knees next to me. Please don’t say you’re on the pill so it’s okay… She sat back letting out a sigh. Whew! That was my out. It was also my cue. I stood, grabbed the various remotes to shut down the system and turned up the lights.

  I walked her to the guest bedroom nearest my suite and kissed her head. “Goodnight, Niña.” I yawned. “I’m up at five for a workout downstairs in the gym. I’ll be done around eight.”

  My chest tightened when she turned into the room, visibly moping as she headed to the bed. Each step farther into the room she took, I watched her little ass jiggle. My dick was so hard the shit was painful. I don’t know how, but I found sleep at some point after twisting and turning much of the night with Zoey’s scent still in my nostrils.

  Later that night…or early morning, I rolled over and was stopped by something small and warm. I opened my eyes to find Zoey, quietly snoring with her lips parted. She appeared so innocent and calm, even more than I knew her to be before we arrived here in Alpine, where her seductress persona materialized. This was the Zoey I knew; soft and drama-free. After staring at her for a few minutes, I was able to fall back asleep. But my lewd dreams of her were something I couldn’t control.

  The following morning, I was slamming refrigerator and cabinet doors while trying to time the stove. Grease was popping everywhere and my fucking pancakes looked nothing like I’d ever been served. The bacon had burned to a crisp just as I was searching for a bowl large enough to whip the eggs in. And to top it off, I’d be damned if the bread didn’t pop from the toaster black as tar. I’d fucked up big time and I had little food to start with. I already knew the first thing we’d do this morning was hit the grocery store. Where was Emilda when I needed her? Out of nowhere, I felt the damn spatula being snatched from my hand.

  “No, Leo,” she sighed. “It wasn’t Lewin’s research on conditioned reflexes that influenced the rise of behaviorism. It was Pavlov’s experimental methods that helped transition psychology from introspection and subjective assessments to objective measurement of behavior.”

  That reminded me of the tutoring call she said she had this morning. As she spoke, Zoey removed the pan of bacon from the eye and turned the stove off. She rotated, in search of something and then took long strides over to the refrigerator. I couldn’t help but notice she was irritated, certainly not my cool and funny Zoey.

  “Lewin was groundbreaking in modern social psychology because of his work that used scientific methods and experimentation to explore social behavior. Remember,” she paused, scanning the contents of the refrigerator. “Uhhhhh…he was a seminal theorist whose great influence in psychology still makes him one of the most distinguished psychologists of the 20th century.”

  I stood back from the open area to give her space. Zoey wore fitted jeans, a brown sweater and ugly ass Ugg boots. She tapped on the fridge door, humming. “No, that would be JP…Jean Piaget. Yes…”

  She pulled out the nearly empty carton of eggs, shredded cheese, a half cut green pepper and deli sliced ham. Then she started opening and damn near slamming cupboard doors, making me flinch. Finally she found another frying pan.

  “Hang on Leo, I need to put you on speaker while I cook.”

  She punched a few keys and then I heard the voice of young Leo. He sounded like a jock. I’d hoped he was paying her a fair wage. All of sudden I didn’t like sharing her time with a frat boy. They exchanged words as she continued rattling off names and theories. A crazy sensation ran through my chest when I realized she never paid me a glance since walking into the kitchen. I’d hoped she wasn’t hanging on to my rejection last night.

  “Yeah…well, I know his work is in psychosexual development. No one can forget Freud!” Leo informed, just a litt
le too excitedly, bringing my attention back to their conversation. “Do you think if he were around today, he could help me score with you?”

  My ass bounced off the counter. Zoey’s neck snapped to find me. Her arm slammed into my chest when I went for the phone. I stood in the middle of the kitchen flexing.

  “Uhhh…” she eyed me warily. “Leo, it doesn’t seem that I’ll be scoring…with anyone.” She rolled her eyes away from me on that. “Listen, go over the ones we’ve discussed today and we’ll plan a time to meet and get you acquainted with the others when I get back on campus.” She sounded even more aggravated.

  When she hung up, she transferred plates of omelets and toast to the island then went looking for utensils. My Niña was obviously frustrated.

  “The last on the left,” I advised, feeling like a useless ass.

  She got forks and knives and we sat down to eat. The omelet was delicious. I was grateful that she was able to pull a rabbit out of a hat for breakfast. I hadn’t planned on being at the house these few days and didn’t leave any notice for my housekeeper to stock it with food. We were lucky to find what we did. I’m usually in Philly during the season. Not much got me off schedule. Until…

  I glanced across the island. Zo was quiet.

  “You okay, kid?” I tried, adding a smirk to lighten the moment.

  “Mmm-hmm,” sounded from her throat after filling her mouth with a forkful.

  “Then why the hell won’t you look at me?” I was now getting a little irritated.

  Her eyes slowly rolled up to mine. “Happy?” she snapped her neck.

  There was my smart ass Zo. I chuckled and in spite of herself, so did she.

  “You meeting up with the kid, Leo, when you get back?”

  Yup, I’m sitting on a fucking maxi pad.

  “That’s how I make my money.” Her sarcasm was thick.

  “Talking about psycho-development…specifically sex?”

  She shrugged. “You know what they say: those who can’t have sex, talk about psychosexual development.” More sarcasm.