The Walls We Built

by Kassandra Garrison

  Hey, Ezra.

  Hi, Charlotte.

  I tried to call.

  Yeah, I saw. There’s been a lot going on lately.

  Sophie told me about your dad. I’m glad he’s getting help.

  Me, too. I guess you saw Mason and I talking.

  Yeah, I’m glad you guys are getting along now.

  I could tell he was unsure of my intentions as I stepped even closer to him, closing the distance between us to ensure privacy.

  I didn’t mean for you to leave, Ezra. I said a lot of things I shouldn’t have.

  Yes, but you also said something I needed to hear. You were right. I let my dad control every aspect of my life. After I left the farm, I drove back home and confronted him about everything. How I wanted to make my own decisions and how his drinking affected the entire family. He was resistant at first but after a few rough weeks and a lot of family discussion, he ended up admitting he had a problem and agreed to get help.

  That’s great, Ezra.

  What about your family? What happened after I left?

  Ezra’s hands were casually pushed into the pockets of his jeans as he rocked back and forth on his heels.

  My dad apologized for everything and Cara talked me into opening back up to my mom and Mason. Since then, we’ve had multiple visits and Mason wants to have coffee tomorrow morning after class.

  Wow, Char. That’s a big change. And you’re okay with them now?

  Well, we’re all rebuilding relationships and trust so it’s been hard. But I’m grateful for it. It’s opened my eyes.

  I studied his still stoic expression, wanting desperately to have the old Ezra back. The funny, witty, and sweet Ezra.

  Ezra, I’m sorry. There’s so much I want to take back but I can’t…

  What’s done is done, Char. Enjoy the block party, okay?

  As Ezra began walking away, I grabbed his elbow until he turned back around. His eyes were guarded as he looked down at me. My heart nearly beat out of my chest when I realized my opportunity to get through to him was slipping away.

  My name is Charlotte Pryor. When I was eight, my mom left with my brother without a word. My dad hid secrets about their divorce from me for ten years. Now, we’re starting over and I’m scared to death to trust them again. I have trust issues and I push people away because I’m afraid anyone I love will leave.

  Ezra watched intently as I poured out my soul to him, making myself vulnerable like never before. I tore down every wall I ever built as I stood before him, desperate to win him back.

  For years, I hid behind books because they were an escape from my issues. But now, I don’t want an escape. I want this life. I want my messed-up family. And I want you, Ezra Blake. You’ll never have to tear down my walls again. I’ve torn them down. Forever.

  Suddenly, he stepped toward me, towering above me as he spoke. I flinched as I awaited the rejection I deserved.

  You are the most frustrating person I have ever met. You’re stubborn, guarded, sarcastic, and irritatingly independent. I had to chase you for months before you admitted your feelings for me. You always say your mind even if it hurts people’s feelings.

  There was no doubt Ezra took my advice about speaking his mind as he continued to unleash his opinion of me.

  And now that I am speaking my mind and making my own choices, I want to tell you what I really think about you.

  Wait, there was more? My gosh, at this point, I’d be running back to my dorm with my tail permanently tucked between my legs.

  I have never regretted chasing after you or the work I had to complete to win you over. Because, Char, you are the most witty, intelligent, funny, real, and beautiful girl I have ever met.

  My flinching gradually turned into a smile as I realized his confession was leading to positivity. Finally, the Ezra I knew and loved came back to life as his eyes softened and a smile played across his lips.

  Can I buy you a lemon shake-up, Ezra?

  A lemon shake-up, Char? Isn’t that a big commitment?

  Yeah, but I think I’m ready.

  Ezra closed the gap between us and pulled me against him. He smiled as he bent his head down and kissed me softly on the lips. When we pulled away from one another, I allowed myself to get lost in his deep blue eyes.

  Does it change anything if I want strawberry?

  Nope, Ezra, not a thing.

  As we joined our friends hand in hand, I realized there was no book I would rather be reading in that moment. For the first time in ten years, I wanted to live the life I was given.

  Yes, life can be filled with heartache. Every person will react in their own way, make their own mistakes, build their own walls, just as my family did. My dad built walls because of loss, my mother because of guilt, my brother because of rejection, and Ezra because of his father.

  I wasted so much time pushing people away, building walls around my fear of abandonment. Yet, what I found in my vulnerability was a family, a boyfriend, a best friend, and so much more. I found love. And all I had to do was look behind the walls we built.