Be with Me

by Maya Banks

  He lifted her off his lap, set her between him and Cam, then rose abruptly.

  “I’ll be back later,” he said shortly.

  Without a backward glance, he strode for the door, nearly colliding with Hutch as Hutch walked into the living room.

  Hutch stared curiously after him but shrugged then walked over to where Cam and Regina sat.

  “You ready to go shopping, baby?”

  She sucked in her breath. Yeah. Shopping. Anything to get her mind off the sizzling tension between her and Sawyer. Or the fact that she was sorely tempted to run after him, tackle him and fuck his brains out.

  She reached her hand over to Cam’s and squeezed. Then she leaned over to kiss him before she got up from the couch.

  “Later,” he said in a husky voice. “If Sawyer hasn’t carried you off to parts unknown by then.”

  There was knowing amusement in his voice, but also an easy acceptance that warmed her. God, they might really be okay in all this.

  “Love you,” she whispered, thrilled at how it sounded coming past her lips.

  “Love you, Reggie darling. Have fun with Hutch. I’ll be working. Stick your head in when you get back so I’ll know you’re here.”

  She smiled and got off the couch to walk over to Hutch. He reached for her hand when she got close. He laced their fingers together and pulled her toward the front door.

  Not one to take on any of the large malls in the Houston area, Regina instead opted for the nearest Super Wal-Mart and bought a couple of pairs of jeans, a few shirts, underwear and socks, and she snagged a pair of flip-flops. Because while she could at least reach down to lace her shoes now, it was still damn uncomfortable.

  When she suggested they pick up steaks for Cam to grill as they’d originally planned, Hutch look at her, appalled. She raised her hands, palms up. “What?”

  “You’re such a barbarian,” he muttered. “You and Sawyer, I swear.”

  “What?” she demanded again.

  “You do not buy steaks from Wal-Mart. If it’s not against the law, it should be. If you want steaks, we’ll run by City Market on our way home.”

  “That’s at least forty-five minutes out of the way.”

  He shrugged. “So? You not feeling adventurous today?”

  Her eyes narrowed. “Was that a dare?”

  He grinned innocently. “Would I dare you to do anything? I could pick up some good wine and the fixings for cheesecake. I make a mean one.”

  Her mouth watered. “You had me at sugar.”

  He pulled his wallet out to pay for her clothes, but she frowned and put her hand out to stop him. He sighed heavily but moved out of her way so she could give the cashier her bank card.

  “Any chance you’d make some fudge?” she asked hopefully as they climbed into Cam’s SUV.

  The corners of his eyes crinkled with amusement. “I could be talked into it.”

  “Yum,” she said enthusiastically. “Overcook it a little so it’s hard like I like it.”

  He stared balefully at her. “I’ve got something hard for you, little wench.”

  She burst out laughing. “Hutch!” Then she glanced over at him mischievously. “Make me chocolate, and I’ll do something about that something hard of yours.”

  For a moment she worried she’d gone a little overboard with the seductive tramp talk. It didn’t sound like her. Oh, not that she was pure sweetness and light. In fact, before a year ago, she could be just as crude as the guys when they horsed around.

  She grimaced. That was the problem. There were a lot of things she used to do when she hadn’t been worried about what they thought of her. With a sigh, she turned and looked out the window before he could respond.

  They navigated 610 and exited to go to the large gourmet grocery store that was a favorite of Hutch’s. She went in with him and watched him analyze every piece of beef behind the glass case before finally choosing four large ribeyes.

  While the butcher wrapped them, Hutch meandered down the display, perusing the other selections. Regina reached up for the package just as Hutch returned.

  “Let’s go over to the seafood. Thought I’d get some shrimp to do one night.”

  “Beer-battered with hush puppies?” she asked.

  “Of course. According to Sawyer, beer is its own food group,” he said dryly. “Well, that and ketchup.”

  That was true, and although Hutch tolerated Sawyer’s affinity for beer (and Reggie’s), he never once drank alcohol himself. The wine he was holding he got for the rest of them, but he never consumed it either.

  It had something to do with his father. That much she knew, and nothing more. Hutch never talked about his life prior to his arrival at Birdie’s.

  “You spoil me,” she finally said.

  He grinned. “I try. I’m not suave like Cam, not as intelligent and refined, and I’m not the great hulking muscle-bound beef-cake that Sawyer is, so my plan is to seduce you with food.”

  She laughed. “Knowing what you do about me, then, should tell you that you’ll get a lot further than the other two.”

  He winked at her. “I know. Your stomach is the door to your soul.”

  They checked out and walked back to the truck.

  “How are you holding up?” he asked as he slid into the driver’s seat.

  “I’m good,” she said as she buckled her seat belt. “Don’t worry.” She held up her wrist and bent and rotated it for him. “See? Almost completely well. Just a little stiff and twingy.”

  “Your bruises are almost gone,” he said quietly.

  Her hand went to her throat reflexively. “Really all that I still feel is the cut on my head. I should be able to go back to work soon.” Or maybe not if her department didn’t have any luck with their investigation. That thought depressed her.

  Hutch scowled as he drove out of the parking lot. “I wish you weren’t going back at all,” he muttered.

  She stared at his profile in surprise. “Why would you say something like that?”

  He glanced briefly away from traffic and locked gazes with her. “You want me to lie?”

  “No, of course not.”

  He turned his attention to merging onto 610. “It’s dangerous,” he said. “It worries me.”

  She twisted in her seat as much as the belt would allow and faced him. “I can take care of myself, Hutch. I’m a trained police officer. I can fire my weapon with pinpoint accuracy. I qualified first in my department at the range. I’m trained in self-defense, and I’ve taken numerous classes in martial arts and hand-to-hand combat. I’m not just a skirt and a pretty face behind a badge. I’m damn good at my job.”

  “All of that training didn’t help you the night that bastard attacked you. Qualifying first with your gun doesn’t help if it gets taken away from you,” he said darkly. “He almost killed you. He tried to kill you.”

  She took deep breaths and struggled not to let anger get the best of her. She knew he worried about her.

  “I didn’t say I was invincible,” she said calmly. “No one is. No one person could have withstood that attack. Sawyer couldn’t have taken it, and he’s a big guy. This guy was bigger. Much bigger. And crazy as a loon.

  “A normal person, I would have taken down and made the arrest.”

  “But it only takes one not normal person, Reggie,” he said quietly. “He could have raped you. He could have beaten you to death. He could have choked you. Any number of things could have happened to you because he was bigger and stronger. I get that the result would have been the same with anyone else. But you’re not just anyone else to me, baby.”

  She gazed steadily at him. “I know all those things, Hutch. I do. I train for the worst. I prepare for the worst. Yes, he could have raped me. I know that. But it didn’t happen. I did what I was supposed to do and it paid off. I’m alive because of my training.”

  He paled at her words. “How can you be so calm about this? So matter-of-fact? You talk about being raped like it’s all part of the jo
b. Like him beating the crap out of you was just a hazard of the profession.”

  “It is a hazard of the profession,” she said gently. “It’s not one that occurs with frequency, but it’s always a possibility. I could get shot. I could get beat up. I could get raped. Or run over. There’s a million what-ifs. I knew that going in.”

  His fingers were white around the steering wheel, and his jaw was drawn tight. “You knowing it doesn’t make it any easier for me to sit back and worry every time you go to work.”

  “What are you saying, Hutch? Are you giving me an ultimatum here?” Worry clutched at her belly, and warning bells were clanging with ferocity in her head.

  “No, of course not,” he muttered. “Damn it, I just worry. That’s all I’m saying.”

  She reached across the seat and put her hand on his shoulder. “I know you worry, Hutch. I wish there was something I could do to make you stop. All I can promise you is that I’ll be careful and that I’ll do everything in my power to come home to you each and every time.”

  “Are you?” he asked. “Going to be coming home to me every time?”

  She glanced away. Maybe she’d been precipitous in saying that. “I’m willing to see where things take us,” she said quietly.

  “That’s all I can ask, baby.”

  He picked up her hand and kissed it then lowered it to his lap, where he kept his fingers laced through hers. They drove the rest of the way in silence, but he kept his hand tight around hers.

  CHAPTER 23

  Regina and Hutch took the food into the kitchen, and Hutch unwrapped the steaks and set them to marinating. When he started to put the ingredients for the cheesecake into the fridge, her brows went up.

  “Not going to fix it?” she asked.

  “Later,” he said shortly.

  Then he pulled out a pen and paper and scribbled a note. He propped it against the pan the steaks were marinating in then went to the sink to wash his hands.

  Regina walked up and leaned over to read the note. Hutch’s hand curled around her shoulder, and she jumped.

  “Just me telling Cam that the steaks will be ready to grill in an hour,” Hutch said easily.

  “You going somewhere?” she asked.

  “Upstairs. With you.”

  Her eyes widened, and her heart skipped a beat, giving her that panicky, hiccup feeling in her chest. He pulled her into his arms and stared down at her mouth with half-lidded eyes, as if he wanted nothing more than to kiss her.

  Her mouth fell open as she tried to gulp more air into her painfully squeezed lungs. She was nervous, yes. Particularly now, after having made love to Cam. Hutch knew it, he had to. She and Cam hadn’t exactly been discreet.

  What were Hutch’s motives? And did it matter, when she wanted him so badly?

  He angled his head and slowly closed the distance between them. His lips pressed gently to hers, taking possession of her mouth.

  His tongue glided effortlessly over hers, tasting, offering his taste to her. He was present, inside her, every time she inhaled. His scent filled her. Comfort. Safety. Love.

  For all practical purposes, this was the first time they’d make love together. Just the two of them. And suddenly she was scared to death.

  Hutch felt her tremble against him, shake underneath his fingertips as he held her close. Her little gasps came raggedly, and when he drew away, her pupils were dilated. She looked frightened.

  Pain curled its fist around him, squeezing uncomfortably. She was afraid. Of him.

  “Why are you looking at me that way?” she asked.

  He must have allowed his feelings to show, not that he’d ever been good at hiding them from her. She had a way of prying him open, flaying him wide for the world to see. Not a comfortable prospect for a man.

  “You’re afraid of me,” he said in a low voice.

  Sorrow filled her eyes, and she reached out to cup his face. He couldn’t help the reaction that had him turning into her palm to kiss the baby-soft skin.

  “Not of you,” she whispered. “Never of you, Hutch. But I won’t lie to you and say I’m not afraid. Not of you, but of what you think. Of what you feel.”

  His brows drew together in confusion. He sensed this was an important conversation, and he didn’t want to have it down here, no matter that he was supposed to be willing to share Reggie with Cam and Sawyer. No one ever said he couldn’t hold some part of her special, away from the others.

  “Will you come upstairs with me, baby? We can talk in the bedroom.”

  She nodded, and he took her hand, holding it tightly in his. They walked to the stairs, side by side, and he curled his arm around her waist as they started up.

  He nudged her into his room and shut the door behind them. Without hesitation, he pulled her against his chest, tilting her head back so he could claim her lips.

  “I’ve waited so long to have you like this, Reggie,” he whispered as he walked her backward toward the bed. “In my arms, looking at me like you looked at me in the kitchen.”

  He eased her down onto the bed, coming with her, holding himself above her as he stared intently into her eyes.

  “Tell me what you’re afraid of, baby.”

  She gazed up at him and reached to touch his face. She traced the lines of his forehead and feathered down to his jawline. Tentatively, she ran one finger over his firm lips.

  He caught the tip between his teeth, nipping ever so slightly as he sucked it into his mouth.

  A quiver worked over her body. She wanted that mouth on hers. He would be so exquisitely gentle. He’d always treated her like fine china. Had always been protective of her, always supported her hopes and dreams.

  “I’m not afraid of you,” she hastened to explain. “Never of you, Hutch. I’m afraid of seeing the way you look at me changing. Of the way you feel about me changing.”

  His brow crinkled, and his eyes flared. “Why would any of that change?”

  “Because I made love with Cam,” she said quietly. “Because . . . I’ll make love to Sawyer.”

  His breath blew slightly over her hair, ruffling it from her forehead.

  “Cam said . . .”

  “What did Cam say?” he asked, a note of curiosity in his tone.

  “He said that if it had been you or Sawyer who made love to me the other night, that while he would have wanted it to be him, he wouldn’t have been upset. He said he’d have been relieved.”

  “Relieved.” He frowned a little as he said it, and she held her breath until his expression eased. “I suppose I can understand why he put it that way.”

  “Can you?” she asked. “Are you angry or hurt that I was with him?”

  He shook his head emphatically, even as his expression remained indecisive. He slid his knee between her legs and shifted a little to her right so they rolled to their sides. He pillowed her head on his muscular arm, and he stroked his other hand down her side until it came to rest on her hip.

  “I’m not angry or hurt, baby. I knew if this was going to work for us that you would be making love with Cam and Sawyer. I don’t expect the times you spend with them to always be in a group setting. I don’t expect to share my every moment with you with them, so it isn’t fair for me to expect it of them.”

  “But are you really okay with it?” she asked anxiously. There was still an undercurrent of doubt in his voice, and it pulled at her.

  “Define ‘okay,’ ” he said with a wry laugh. “I won’t lie to you and say that when I walked downstairs and saw you lying with Cam on