See How She Fights

by Michelle Graves

  “Lightning bolts?” he asked.

  “Mind reading is rude,” I said, blushing crimson. I hoped he couldn’t read everything that passed through my mind. That would just be embarrassing.

  “I apologize. I will do my best to not pry into your mind. There was such a look of consternation on your face that I could not help myself from seeing what had caused it. I will not do that again.” Aberto had such a serious look on his face I felt kind of bad for a split second. “We must get her fed, Guardian,” he said to Conall.

  “This way please.” Conall led us to the dining facility. We got strange looks the entire way. I wondered if Old Ones were really rare. The way people reacted to Aberto was unnerving. Then again, they were all reacting the same way I did. There was just something about him that screamed “I’m not like you.”

  “How goes the practice?” Conall asked me, pulling me from my reverie.

  “Horribly. I am pretty sure I will just end up puking all over Xavier instead of actually being able to save anyone. This whole thing sucks,” I grumbled. I was tired. I was cranky. My head felt like it was about to explode, and I was hungry.

  “When did she last eat?” Aberto looked at me concerned.

  “At breakfast this morning,” Conall said, looking at his watch. I looked over and noticed that the time had moved forward quickly. It was already three in the afternoon.

  “We must venture to take better care of the Council leader, must we not?” Aberto looked over at me thoughtfully.

  “You are correct. It was my duty to make sure she was cared for. I have failed in this.” Conall looked concerned.

  “I’m not a pet, you know? Plus I’m standing right here. Maybe ya’ll could talk to me like I’m a person. I can take care of myself,” I huffed.

  “Sorry Izzy. I feel as though I have not fulfilled the promise I made to Kennan when he left you in my keep. He won’t be happy.” Conall looked uncomfortable. I reached up and placed my hand on his arm causing him to jump.

  “It will be our secret. It isn’t your fault I forget to eat. A normal person would remember that they were hungry. Let’s just go get some food now, okay?” I moved past the men into the dining facility. I hoped they had a pizza somewhere. I was craving some carbs in a bad way.

  “You are anything but normal,” I heard Conall whisper beneath his breath. I looked back to find Aberto assessing Conall steadily. Whatever was passing behind his eyes, I didn’t care about. All I could think of was food and getting back to trying to save the Seers.

  I headed toward the kitchen area and found one of the chefs that the Council kept on hand.

  “Can I help you, Milady?” he asked with a deep bow.

  “Do you by chance have anything that I could eat? My stomach feels like it is about to eat itself.” I looked around the kitchen and heard the chef pull in a sharp breath as Aberto entered behind me. He stood entirely too close to my back. I felt his heat radiate out and wrap itself around me. I wanted to move away, but in the tight quarters there was nowhere to go.

  “And you sir, is there anything I can get for you?” The chef bowed even more deeply.

  “I will have whatever she chooses if it is no trouble,” Aberto said.

  “It is no trouble at all. Shall I heat up what we served for lunch? A Seer named Molly came down and told me to set aside some portions for you. She said something about you forgetting to eat,” the chef mumbled as he made himself busy moving around the kitchen.

  “That would be amazing.” God, I loved Molly. That girl was amazing. If I’d been in her shoes I would’ve been a pile of snotty, blubbery mess right now. She was a pillar of strength. When this was all over she and I were going to have some serious girl time. Hopefully sans Guardians.

  “I shall bring it out to you if you would like to make yourselves comfortable.”

  “Oh, Conall is with us. Do you have enough to feed him as well?” I didn’t want my substitute Guardian to go hungry.

  “Of course, Milady. I will have it out to you shortly.” He bowed once more and I grumbled as I left the kitchen.

  “Did he do something to offend you?” Aberto’s eyebrows creased in confusion.

  “No, I just don’t like the whole bowing thing. Or the ‘Milady’s.’ Or the whole ‘you’re the new leader of our people.’ I’m just not used to it. I need an adjustment period.”

  “Much has been asked of you since you came of age.” Aberto looked at me thoughtfully.

  “Yep.” I was so not in the mood for a serious conversation. I wanted to eat and get back to trying to separate my soul from my body. Wow, that’s a sentence I never thought I would say. When did my world get so weird?

  “Was there food made available to you?” Conall asked from a table that had a glass of sweet tea waiting on me.

  “Yes, and thank you for the drink. You are a prince. Truly.” I sat down and took a long drink of the sugary delight. They’d started making sweet tea for me when I stayed after the lab incident. I think they had wanted to do anything that might appease the crazy person back then, but they’d gotten so used to making it that it was always available now. I wasn’t complaining. I felt the sugar rush into my system giving me a jolt. “He is bringing some food out for you as well.”

  “You should not concern yourself with my well-being.” Conall looked surprised.

  “Yes I should. You’re my friend and right now you are acting as my Guardian. So yeah, color me concerned. If you don’t eat, you can’t protect me. So really, I’m just being selfish.” I smiled at him, causing him to drop his guard a little.

  The food arrived shortly thereafter. It wasn’t the pizza I’d been longing for. Instead I found a plate filled with roasted turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, and green beans. I guess the chef was in a Thanksgiving sort of a mood. I wasn’t going to complain. Although I was a little concerned I would be sent into a tryptophan coma.

  I devoured my food hardly taking a second to breathe. I looked up to find Conall and Aberto staring at me.

  “What?” I mumbled around a mouthful of mashed potatoes.

  “Nothing, I just didn’t believe Kennan when he said you could out perform a vacuum. Not until now,” Conall said, earning him a kick under the table. He just laughed at went back to eating.

  I tried to slow down in my hoovering but I was famished. Sometimes I didn’t realize how hungry I was until I started eating. This was one of those times. I went back to ignoring the two men and continued devouring everything on my plate. By the time I finished, I felt completely sated. I leaned back in the chair and rubbed my stomach, earning a raised brow from Conall.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Is there something we do not know about?” Conall looked at my stomach.

  “Oh, God no! It is just my food baby,” I said, looking down at my now full stomach.

  “What is a food baby?” Aberto looked perplexed.

  “My stomach gets really full after I eat and I call it my food baby because it causes it to stick out a little,” I said snickering. These men were all so literal.

  “So, there are no babes yet?” Conall asked.

  “No, and none in the plans for a long time. Being a mom is not exactly on my agenda right now. Maybe if the world would stop falling apart I would have time to think about it. For now, I just need to survive this latest catastrophe. If the world stops crumbling after that, well, maybe.” I thought of little Kennans running around and started to smile. I hoped he would return tonight. I missed him.

  “If you are finished, I fear we must return to the task at hand,” Aberto said, changing the subject. I looked at him and found that the sadness had returned in his eyes. I wondered what had caused the change.

  “Alright,” I sighed, getting up from the table.

  “I shall wait outside the door once more,” Conall said, following us out of the dining facility and back to the office.

  We walked down the hall and entered the office, leaving Conall to stand guard outside. Aberto walked up to
me, putting his body so close to my own that we were almost flush with one another. I tried to step back, but he grabbed me pulling me ever closer.

  “Excuse me?” I placed my hands on his chest and tried to push him away. I didn’t like it when he got that close to me. It made me uncomfortable for so many reasons. Some of which I was not willing to look too closely at.

  “Please stop fighting me. I would like to try something. It may help you to separate yourself. I will not do anything untoward. You have my word.” He looked down at me with pleading eyes.

  “Fine, but no funny business.” I narrowed my eyes at him. I trusted him to help me but no further than that.

  “Thank you. Now I need you to relax.” He took his hands and placed them on either side of my face. He closed his eyes, causing his long black lashes to fan out against his cheeks. It was so unfair that he had such pretty lashes. He began saying words I could not comprehend and I felt a strange sense of peace settle over my body. He stopped and stepped away from me.

  “Try now.” He nodded toward the couch for me to lay down.

  “What did you do to me?” I asked, doing as he commanded.

  “I eased your fears. You are holding yourself back with your self-doubt. You are a soul walker, Izzy. You have done this before, yet your fear of being unable to save the Seers is holding you back. I eased some of that fear,” he said, moving to stand as far away from me as the office allowed.

  “Thank you.”

  I laid back against the pillows on the couch and let myself melt into the cushions. I did as I had that morning. I thought of myself as two halves of a whole and I mentally began to untie the binds that held me together. This time it did not feel forced. It felt like the most natural thing I’d ever done. I pulled myself apart and found myself standing over my prone body. I felt nothing pulling me back. I looked over to find Aberto staring at me.

  “Very good,” he said.

  “How can you see me?” I asked.

  “Now is not the time for those answers. Put yourself back and do it again,” he commanded. He was so bossy and vague. He could totally win a man of mystery award. It wasn’t nearly as appealing of a trait in real life as it was in the movies.

  I narrowed my eyes at him before I pulled myself back into my body. I felt everything stitch itself back together and I opened my eyes. I was once more lying on the couch. I breathed deeply and thought of the Seers. I needed to get this right. I had to perfect this so that I could save them. I felt a wave of nausea creep up and I tamped it down. I had no time for it. I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes once more.

  “Do not try and force it. Let it happen. This is not unnatural, Izzy. Like your visions, this is a part of you. Accept it and it will no longer be a burden. Now, do it again.” he was relentless. I wanted to throat punch him every time the word “again” passed his lips. Stupid know-it-all.

  We spent the next couple of hours that way. I hopped in and out of my body like some sort of deranged Jack-in-the-Box. I was exhausted and hungry. I wanted nothing more than to quit and go sleep for the next five days.

  “Now, we will try it without the damper.” he moved toward me and pulled me up from the couch. My body was flush with his, once more. The closeness drew that strange familiarity back to the surface. I knew this man, but I the truth was, I didn’t know him at all.

  He lifted his hands to my face and I kept my eyes staring straight forward. I did not want to see what secrets were written in his blue eyes. I wanted to survive this and go back to Alabama. I wanted to marry the man I loved and have a future that did not involve eyeless Seers and death.

  I felt my fears come rushing back to the surface and instead of letting them drown me I embraced them. These fears were not unfounded. I would take them and make them fuel I was determined to get this right. Just as I resolved myself the door to the study burst open and Kennan came stomping in.

  I looked up to find his eyes burning with a fire I’d only ever seen there once. I was afraid of what he thought was going on. I felt like I needed to defend myself and then I realized he was the one being unreasonable. I swallowed my explanation and moved away from Aberto and towards him.

  “I missed you,” I sighed as I wrapped my arms around him.

  “What is going on here, Izzy?” he asked slowly. He pulled my body against his own and I immediately felt like I was home once more. All of my fears washed away to be replaced by the comfort of his protection.

  “I am teaching her to soul walk,” Aberto said, eyeing us steadily.

  “How long have you known you could do this, Izzy?” Kennan asked, pulling back to look down at me.

  “I didn’t know what it was. I did it the night of the tattoo ceremony,” I shrugged, pulling myself back against his body and leaning my head against his chest.

  “Did you not think to tell anyone?” he asked Aberto.

  “It was not the right time. She was not ready,” he replied. “We must return to our training. If you feel the need to remain in the room you must not interfere.”

  “Can’t I just take a break and come back tomorrow?” I asked. All I wanted to do was go up to my room and wrap myself around Kennan.

  “You do not have the luxury of following your whims. Learning to do this is imperative if you wish to save the Seers trapped between planes. Do not balk at your responsibility just to fulfill your personal delights.” Disdain dripped from his every word.

  I felt the angry tears start to rise in my eyes and I tamped them down. I didn’t know what I’d done to deserve such censure. I swallowed down my pride and nodded. I pulled back and reached my face up to kiss Kennan deeply. I knew that Aberto was right. I needed to worry about someone besides myself. It didn’t excuse how he had talked to me, though. I pulled back from the kiss and looked in Kennan’s eyes.

  “Are you sure? You don’t have to do this right now. We can find another way,” Kennan said, running his hand down my cheek. I leaned into it. He looked over to Aberto. “Don’t push too far, Old One. She is still new to this. Remember that,” he said before turning to leave.

  “You can’t protect her from her destiny, Guardian. You know this,” Aberto said.

  “I can try,” Kennan said before slamming the door.

  “What was that?” I said, wiping at my eyes.

  “Get back to work,” Aberto said coldly.

  I threw myself back on the couch, fuming. I could not stand this rollercoaster I’d been on for the past few days. I would master this and then leave Aberto to find Kennan. I longed to surround myself in his comfort. I wanted to forget about my responsibilities for a while. Most of all, I needed to belong to myself again. I swallowed my anger and concentrated on ripping myself apart. I did it more quickly than I’d done all day. I stood outside my body and looked over to find Aberto assessing me with steady eyes. He nodded toward my body.

  “Again,” he said.

  I mended myself back together and did it all again. I repeated the process another ten times. Each time he said again. Each time I let my anger fuel me. Finally, I sat up on the couch and looked at him steadily.

  “I’m done,” I said, getting up to leave.

  “You can’t allow him to hold you back from what you are meant to be,” Aberto’s voice was calm and steady, causing my nerves to be set on edge.

  “Do not pretend to know anything about me or Kennan. You weren’t there last year. He may be trying to protect me, but he is not doing it just to keep me to himself. I’m done for today. I’ll look at the ceremony tomorrow and if I find that I can’t do it on my own I’ll find you.” I got up from the couch and headed to the door. “Thank you for your help,” I added. I knew that he had helped me and I felt guilty for not at least acknowledging it.

  “I am ever at your service,” he bowed as he faded from my sight. I looked around the room wondering where he had poofed to. I wondered if he was still floating around where I could not see him.

  “Whatever,” I mumbled and left the room in search of Kennan
. I didn’t have to search far. I found him sitting just outside the room, next to Conall.

  **********

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  “Are you done?” Kennan asked.

  “I am for tonight. Want to get some food?” I asked, heading toward him.

  “I would love to.” He wrapped me under his arm and placed a kiss atop my head causing me to smile up at him.

  “I love you,” I sighed into him.

  “As I do you,” he replied.

  “If you need me, you know where to find me, Brother,” Conall said before bowing.

  “Thank you for your help. I am indebted to you,” Kennan said.

  “It was my honor to serve her,” Conall said as he made his way down the hall.

  “Are you okay?” Kennan looked me over as if to make out any small thing that might have altered in the last day and a half.

  “I’m fine. I just want to put an end to all of this and get back to Alabama. I know I probably won’t be able to stay there for long, but there has to be some sort of vacation time associated with this job. Right?” I looked up at him with wide eyes. I really hoped I would get some time off from saving the world. Doing it for another two hundred some odd years with no break was not something I was interested in.

  “I’m sure, as the head of the Council, you can make your own schedule, Izzy. Just don’t overexert yourself before then. I’m worried about you.” Kennan pulled me closer.

  “I’m fine. Really, I promise. I don’t feel bad. I’m just a little tired from popping in and out of my body all day.”

  “What did he say to you today about your destiny?”

  There were secrets hidden in Kennan’s voice that I did not like. Once again, I knew he was keeping something from me.

  “What aren’t you telling me Kennan?” I pushed away from him so that I could look him in the eyes. I wanted to watch and see if he would lie straight to my face after everything we had been through the past week.