War of the Posers

by Eric Ugland

  “Sounds lovely.”

  “Indeed. I know a few people who know him — I can make some inquiries.”

  “You mentioned you knew something about the Fayden,” I said. “Can you, I mean, would you mind focusing on that?”

  “The Fayden?” he asked. “Sure. I can try to get something going. It will complicated though. Not exactly my area of expertise.”

  I thought about making a crack about everything beyond serving stale beer being outside his area, but it didn’t seem like it was the atmosphere for jokes.

  “Right,” Matthew said, taking control once again, “Titus is on this Fayden person. Godfrey and Lothar, you two button these three buildings up. I want to know they are all safe, and, if possible, get us a bolt hole out.”

  “The bolt hole is done,” I said. “Boris?”

  “Yes,” Boris said. “That is me.”

  “You made a bolt hole?”

  “You said make no holes.”

  “Didn’t you already make a hole?”

  “I have made many holes.”

  “I’m talking about a specific hole — the one in the basement of this building leading to the sewers.”

  “Yes?”

  “Did you make that hole?”

  “Yes.”

  “So, there we go.”

  “But also unmade it.”

  “You unmade the hole? Filled it in?”

  “Yes.”

  “How filled in?”

  “With hands.”

  “I meant what did you use to fill it with?”

  He held up his hands. “You call hands other name in your world?”

  “I can work on that,” Shae said, putting her hand on my arm. “I’ll work with the kobolds on secure and secret exits.”

  “Fine. Nox,” I said, “can you look into getting all our kobolds citizenship?”

  He nodded at me.

  Matthew whistled and shook his head.

  “That’ll get us noticed,” he said.

  “I don’t want hunters coming in here and killing our kobold buddies.”

  “Hey, I agree. I’m just saying...”

  “We’ll attract attention.”

  “Yes.”

  “That’s a price I’m willing to pay.”

  “It is a price we all must pay,” Godfrey said, peering at the little kobold next to me. I could feel Boris move back just a little, doing his best to just hide behind me. “I believe it will be worth it, eh little friend?”

  “I am not little,” Boris snapped back. “You are oversized.”

  Godfrey laughed.

  Some tension let off with that laugh, and the room slowly began to transform as people started talking among themselves. It was clear that cliques were already forming, and while that wasn’t exactly what I would have wanted, I didn’t really think there was any chance of it not happening. The nature of groups, I suppose.

  Matthew came over, grabbed me by the back of the neck and steered me into a corner.

  “I will guide you along in all of this,” he said quietly, directly into my ear. “But you have my family involved in this game of yours. I believe in you, but know that I will see you destroyed before the slightest bit of harm might befall them.”

  “I get it.”

  “See that you remember it.”

  “I remember it,” I said. “But also know that, as odd as it may sound, I have already died for the people in this room. And I will likely do so again. It is not something I regret, nor something I will shirk from.”

  “That is something odd to have to consider,” he replied.

  Titus was suddenly standing next to me, looking at Matthew. “Are we threatening him?” Titus asked.

  “You can if you want,” Matthew replied. “I’m finished for now.”

  “I kind of want to.”

  “Do you have to?” I asked.

  “I think he understands the gravity of it all,” Matthew said. “That our families are involved as well.”

  “Well, apparently he is family, so—“ Titus started.

  Matthew grunted, shook his head, and looked around the room. He saw Nox, clearly he who was looking for, and gestured to the man.

  Nox came closer to our little group of four.

  “Yes?” Nox asked.

  “You are a researcher, yes?” Matthew said.

  “Among other talents. I—“

  “I know your tjene leader and our guild leader has asked you to look into kobold citizenship,” Matthew started.

  I opened my mouth, ready to rush to defense of the kobolds, but Matthew held up a finger to me.

  “But your primary task should be working with Leofing,” Matthew continued. “And it will surely be an unpleasant one. You must investigate the missing children.”

  “In general?” Nox asked.

  “Visit every home they have gone missing from. See if there is something that connects them. There must be something, some clue that others have missed—“

  “Have others even looked?” I asked.

  “Likely not.”

  “So I, a Carchedonian, am supposed to gain entry—“ Nox said, but Matthew interrupted him.

  “That’s why Leofing will be with you,” Matthew said. “He is a paladin of the goddess of life. People will trust him. You are there to investigate, he is there to placate.”

  Nox thought about it for a moment, then nodded. “That will probably work,” he said.

  “Let me show you where to begin,” Matthew said, walking Nox over to the bar.

  Titus leaned against the wall and looked at the other people in the room.

  I rubbed the back of my neck. Matthew was not ever gentle.

  “I didn’t want to talk about this in front of the others,” Titus said, “because they’re a pretty not-bad group of people. The thing is, the Fayden is, well, I don’t know who that might be.”

  “Tell me there’s a but coming and that’s not the end of this,” I said.

  “He’s some sort of underground magician, right?”

  “I mean, I don’t know if he’s actually underground, but yeah. As far as I can tell he’s not an Imperially-sanctioned mancer.”

  “Okay then. So I can’t point you to him, but I can probably get you in the vicinity of people who do know him. So, that’s got to be worth something.”

  “Who are these people?”

  “Low-life scum who dwell in a hive of villainy.”

  “That’s no way to talk about our family, Titus,” I said.

  He gave me a very disappointed look. “Look, as a new member of our family, you need to work on your jokes. They suck.”

  “They don’t suck. I’ve got great jokes. Like, what are shorts short for?”

  “Whatever the right answer might be, this joke is already too long.”

  “Now you’ll just have to live with not knowing.”

  “Oh, how will I ever get over that?”

  “I’m going to bed.”

  “Wise move.”

  I went through the back way, climbing up the secret ladder to my apartment. It was dark inside, and I didn’t bother to turn on a light. I just gave the place a cursory glance. It would certainly be like the Iron Silents to have some assassin waiting for me in my apartment.

  But for once, it was empty. Devoid of life, and also furniture. It looked like I was going for more of a refugee motif. Fleeing the homeland chic.

  I’d half expected Nadya to be in the room waiting for me. Ready to have it out. She’d shout at me for not telling her the truth, and then I would have explained everything to her, and, in my fantasy world at least, she’d have understood why I’d done it. I’d apologize, she’d forgive me, and things would be back to being what they were. Good. Good enough.

  But no one was there. And that made me glum.

  Below me, though, in the apartment directly beneath mine, I heard something. Something was moving down there. I thought about yelling at Hellion the Mimic to knock it off, but it’s not like he was annoyin
g me on purpose. He was just being himself. Perhaps hanging out on the ceiling. Which made me curious, thinking that it might be worth going down and checking in on Nadya’s pet monster. It was possible Nadya was down there, too. I sat up in bed.

  But going there seemed confrontational. I’d seen enough of terrible relationships growing up, I knew that it was important to give people their own space, and their own time, especially when faced with something unexpected. Finding out the person you’re into is from another world — I’m pretty sure that qualifies as something you might need time to process.

  I laid back down.

  I closed my eyes.

  Nothing.

  Wide awake.

  I cycled my mana through my body, feeling the burn of it. I pushed the cycle harder, faster, and the pain flared. I gritted my teeth, and tried to heal myself while cycling the mana.

  It was a bizarre sensation, healing and damaging at the same time, knowing, logically if not otherwise, that both effects were happening to me because of me. But with both things happening at the same time, it was hard to keep anything else in my mind. Even as it was, just juggling the two simultaneously was incredibly taxing. But I noticed that my efficiency was much higher. I had plenty of mana, and even though I was clearly doing some impressive internal damage, I was spending less mana than I had in the past to heal myself.

  My door opened, and I snapped out of it. I threw the blankets off my body, pushed myself out of bed, and snatched the nearest weapon from the nightstand.

  “Why do you have a broom?” Shae asked, flicking the lights on with a wave of her hand.

  I looked at my chosen weapon.

  “I was cleaning?”

  “Ah.”

  She closed the door behind her, and moved toward one of the dressers. She pulled out some clothes, and disappeared into the bathroom.

  I put the broom down, and looked at the bed. The whole living with Shae thing and only having a single bed was getting odd. I mean, it was always odd in a way, but it was now more odd considering what was going on with me and Nadya. Which, to be fair, might be nothing. It was just a kiss, and that was before the whole truth came out, and who knew where it was going to go from there?

  The problem was, I didn’t really know what I wanted. Or, to be more fair, who I wanted. Shae was clearly into me, and she was still the most beautiful person I’d ever seen, even including the one goddess I’d come across. But I had no idea who she was. Or even what she was. Given the realities of Vuldranni, it was within the realm of possibilities she wasn’t even human. I mean, I wasn’t.

  And if I did want things to continue with Nadya, whatever those things might be, it wouldn’t do to sleep in the same bed as Shae. That just didn’t sit right. Or sleep right.

  I did a quick clothing switcheroo, got some coinage, and headed out to spend some money on useless shit at Gideon’s. Maybe I’d look into getting another bed.

  I went downstairs, choosing to pretend I didn’t hear Shae calling after me. I opened the door, and got punched in the face.

  Chapter Three

  “Oh gods,” Titus said. “Sorry. Complete accident. I was about to knock.”

  I rubbed my eye, as if that would stop it from turning black.

  “It’s fine,” I lied, “fits in with the night.”

  Titus just stared at me for a second. Matthew, who was standing behind him, gave him a little nudge.

  ”Speaking of rough nights, did you get enough of a nap in?”

  “Now?”

  “Just then.”

  “When?”

  “Before now.”

  “I wasn’t napping.”

  “Sleeping. The semantics aren’t important. Are you ready to go do a thing?”

  “I’d really prefer not to do anything important right now—“

  “Well yes. In an ideal world, it would certainly be better to be able to choose when we went on this particular journey. But I only know where the event is taking place tonight. I just found out, and it’s one hell of a gamble if I’m going to be able to get this kind of information again.”

  “Uh, okay,” I said. “Do I need anything?”

  “Got some coin?” he asked.

  I jingled the heavy coin pouch at my side.

  He gave me a smile. Then he waved at Matthew, who nodded.

  We walked out into the Glaton night, and Titus nodded at a dark figure standing next to my apartment. Klara stepped out, dressed for protection and stealth. Black leather armor, a thick cudgel at her side.

  “Boss,” she said.

  “She’s coming with,” Titus said, “to make sure we don’t get into too much trouble.”

  “I want to make sure at least one of you comes home,” she said.

  “Preferably me,” Titus said. “He comes back no matter what, right?”

  “I can’t say for sure,” I said, “but that’s the theory.”

  Titus pushed a heavy black hooded cloak into my hands, and pulled his own hood up over his face.

  Klara did the same a moment later.

  “Hoods up tight, lads,” he said. “We’re aiming to be unseen if we can.”

  I pulled the hood up, and the cloak tight, slipping into the edges of darkness as best I could.

  “Mind telling me where we’re going?” I asked.

  “We’re going to an underground event,” Titus said. He spoke quietly, somewhere between a complete whisper and normal. The sort of conversational tone that went unnoticed.

  “Is it literally underground?”

  “Yes.”

  “And what is it?”

  “That part I don’t really know,” he said, pausing as we came to a cross-street. He looked both ways, and then crossed the street quickly. I followed close behind.

  He took another right turn at the next opportunity, and we went down a narrow side street. And then another right. And one more time until we were back where we started.

  “Balls,” he said quietly. “Being followed.”

  I looked around behind us, as did Klara.

  “Don’t bother,” Titus snapped. “They’re not visible.”

  “How do you—“

  He shook his head, and beckoned for me to follow. “Be quick, and follow close behind.”

  We moved through the city just this side of running, and in no time, I was completely lost. I realized how little I actually knew about the part of the city I lived in. Sure, I knew the bit directly around the Heavy Purse very well, all the alleys and back-ways included. But where we were, I had no idea. It was all commercial properties on the ground floor and housing up above. Every building was old, with lots of stone, and between four and six floors high. The streets were paved with round, worn-down stone. Just like everywhere else in Old Town.

  Titus turned us down an alley and sprinted at full speed.

  He caught me by surprise, so it took me a few steps to catch up. But then he was gone out of my sight.

  I went by a small box, and someone yanked me to the ground. I felt like I disappeared into the shadows. Klara would have missed us too, except Titus pulled the same maneuver.

  “Quiet now,” Titus said.

  He was huddled next to me, with Klara on the other side. The three of us tucked in behind to a crate someone had tossed away. We sat there in the mild darkness for what felt like ages. I was about to get up, to say something, but Titus’ hand gripped my arm tightly.

  A figure breezed by us, so close I could smell its smokey scent. The figure hurried down the alley, got to the end, and looked both ways. It chose to go right.

  I let out a slow breath.

  Titus held up a finger. We continued to wait in stillness and silence.

  A minute, or longer, later, the same figure appeared in the alley, this time walking along a little more carefully. It didn’t see us, despite coming very, very close to our little hiding spot. At the end of the alley, it went left.

  This time, Titus gave my arm a squeeze. Slowly he stood up, and shook some of the st
iffness out his legs.

  I did the same.

  When Klara got up, I caught a glint of light off an exposed blade.

  “Safe to talk,” he said. “In case, you know, you want to ask me about that.”

  “You know what that’s about?” I asked.

  “Not a whit.”

  “Was that some—“

  “Just a human, nothing supernatural.”

  “How did you, I mean, I never even saw—“

  “An ability of mine. A little trick from the old days. Now, ready to get on to what we were getting on?”

  “Aren’t you curious who was following us?”

  “Of course. But now that they aren’t following us, it becomes a problem for Matthew and tomorrow. We have our own issues to deal with tonight. Gotta learn how to delegate, dear boy.”

  He gave me an almost roguish smile and clapped me on the shoulder.

  Chapter Four

  We came to an almost hidden door, something I wouldn’t have ever noticed if I hadn’t been looking for it. Its grayish wood matched the surrounding stone exactly.

  Titus knocked twice on the door, waited a moment, and then scratched three times.

  A portal appeared in the door, just big enough for a face. A face did indeed peek out from it to look around. It wasn’t human, at least not exactly. It was kind of like, somewhere else, there was a human pushing their face through a mirror, and looking out through the door that way.

  “Password?” the face asked. Its lips contorted and the sound came out like it was underwater.

  “Stag toothwort,” Titus replied.

  The face disappeared back into the portal, which just sort of fizzled out of the air.

  “Remind me again,” Titus said quietly, “your level?”

  “Uh, nine.”

  “Excuse me?” He asked, turning to me with his eyes wide and eyebrows up. “You’re only nine?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’ve seen his sheet,” Klara said. “Nine.”

  “How in the hells is that possible?” Titus asked.