My Heart's Desire

by Jo Goodman

  "You're bluffing, Rennie," he said softly. He crumpled the paper in his large hand and stuffed it in his jacket pocket. "You don't know the half of it."

  He dropped heavily into his chair and swiveled around to face the window again. The early spring sky was clear, bright with sunshine and somehow promising. He let its warmth bathe his features as he leaned back and propped his feet on the windowsill. It couldn't hurt to see her. Jay Mac was out of town. She had to be realizing that control of Northeast was slipping out of her fingers. Her message didn't sound as urgent as it did desperate.

  Hollis called to his secretary in the front office. "There's been a change in my plans. Cancel my meeting with Stringer. I'll be leaving early this evening."

  * * *

  Leaving nothing to chance, Hollis arrived at the church a full thirty minutes before his meeting with Rennie. The large oak doors to St. Gregory opened easily. The vestibule was empty. Hollis's shoes tapped lightly on the polished wooden floors, though he was hardly aware of the sound. He went to the side chapel and poked his head inside. No one was using the room. Satisfied, he closed the door quietly.

  A parishioner glanced over her shoulder as he entered the nave of the church. Hollis dipped his fingers in the font, genuflected, and sat down in the last row of pews. It wasn't long before the woman rose from her kneeling bench, lighted some prayer candles at the back of the church, then left altogether. As soon as she was gone Hollis went to the organ loft and investigated. There was no one there. He knelt on the floor and looked under the pews, both in the choir loft and then again in the nave. The rows were clear.

  There was no one hiding around the altar or in the nearby robing room. Entering that room made Hollis think of the time Jarret had laid him out on the floor of it. It was not a pleasant memory. He stepped back into the church and glanced around again. He was alone. There was a heavy silence that seemed to lay over everything, as if the air itself absorbed sound rather than conducted it. As it became darker outside, the stained glass windows lost their individual jeweled colors and became nearly as dark as the soldering between the panes.

  Hollis adjusted some of the gas lamps. Their light was reflected in the polished wood of the three confessional boxes. He realized there was still a place he hadn't checked. He started walking toward them.

  The door in the middle, the priest's box, opened. Hollis stopped in his tracks. The priest stepped out and shut the door. He yawned widely, not bothering to cover his mouth. He noticed Hollis only as he was turning to go to the back of the church.

  The priest pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and attempted to look alert. Where he had been slumped against the interior wall, sleeping, his hair was rumpled and his cheek was wrinkled. His round and gentle features flushed a ruddy hue. "I've been fairly caught out, haven't I, son?" he asked, smiling a shade guiltily. "I don't usually nap in the confessional."

  Hollis smiled broadly and easily. "I believe you, Father."

  "Is there something I can do for you?"

  "No, I just came in for a moment alone."

  The priest looked around the church, nodding, satisfied with that answer. "Then, I'll leave you to it," he said. "My housekeeper's making lemon pie for me this evening." He patted his generous belly and smoothed the twisted fitting of his cassock. "She might hold it back if I'm late." He took a step forward, then paused as the doors to the nave opened. "It doesn't seem like you'll be alone after all, son." His dark eyebrows raised a tad. "Unless you've made plans to meet this one."

  Hollis looked over his shoulder and saw Rennie standing on the threshold. She seemed to hesitate when she saw he was not alone. "It's all right, Father. I've never seen her before. We're not using your church as a trysting place."

  The priest nodded. "Good evening, then."

  Hollis made a polite bow with his head. "Good evening." He sat down on the pew and waited. At the back of the church he could hear Rennie's soft voice as she conversed briefly with the priest. A few minutes passed, and then she was sitting beside him.

  The church was cold. Rennie kept on her coat. A silk ivory scarf covered most of her hair. She stared straight ahead, and when she spoke her voice barely broke a whisper. "I wasn't sure that you'd come," she said.

  Hollis had to bend his head to hear her. "I sent a reply."

  "I know. I received it. But I still wasn't sure."

  "You'll have to speak up," he said. "I can barely hear you."

  Rennie looked around uneasily.

  "There's no one else here. I've already checked."

  She frowned, turning to him for the first time. "You've checked? What is that supposed to mean?"

  "It means I don't trust you, Rennie. I'm not certain why you've asked me here. Oh, I know what your note said, but knowing that you need to talk isn't the same as knowing what you want to talk about." Hollis tried to stretch his long legs under the pew in front of him. It was uncomfortable. He moved closer to the end of the pew and pushed his legs into the aisle. He looked askance at her, almost daring her to slide along the bench toward him. "We were married in this church, Rennie," he said with an ironic smile.

  "I don't need to be reminded. If we hadn't had a mass, I wouldn't have required an annulment from the courts and the church."

  "It didn't seem to prove much of an obstacle," he said, regarding her with a derisive, hooded glance. He laid one hand along the back of the pew. His fingers drummed against the wood, nearly brushing Rennie's shoulder. He waited to see if she would move away. She didn't. "You have some powerful friends. Judge Halsey I've met, of course, but who was the bishop that got you the church decree so quickly?"

  "Bishop Colden. My godfather."

  Hollis laughed, shaking his head. "I think I made an error choosing Nina over you." His laughter faded, and his dark brown eyes became bleak. "No, that's not true. I wanted Nina. Her death..." His voice trailed away. There was a long silence while Hollis stared off into space. He turned to Rennie suddenly and said impatiently, "What do you want, Rennie?"

  "The same thing as you," she said. "Northeast Rail."

  One of Hollis's heavy brows arched. His fingers stopped their drumming for a beat, then began again. "Is that right? And just how am I supposed to help you achieve your life's ambition?"

  "I've seen the writing on the wall, Hollis. You're going to take control away from my father."

  "Am I?"

  Rennie's features were set gravely, her eyes implacable. She nodded stiffly, watching him closely. "Unless Jarret finds something in the accounts that goes back to you, you've neatly managed to incriminate Jay Mac."

  Hollis's broad face was giving nothing away. "That's a serious charge you're making, Rennie. I don't think I like it."

  She ignored his subtle denial. "You offered to head the investigation yourself knowing full well that Jay Mac wouldn't stand for it; then you welcomed his naming Jarret to do it in your stead."

  "Why shouldn't I?" he asked casually. "I have nothing to hide. I take it your husband's investigation is proving that."

  "What I've learned from Jarret is that I've seriously underestimated the depth to which you covet Northeast. I would guess that you've been planning the takeover almost from the moment you arrived at the Worth Building."

  "Ambition's not a crime, Rennie." His look was significant. "As you well know. In fact, if you were not so ambitious yourself, I doubt we'd be having this meeting. Isn't that right?"

  She didn't flinch from his dark gaze and nodded.

  "What is it you expect, then?"

  Rennie took a steadying breath and let it out slowly. "I expect to have an equal say in the operation of Northeast," she said baldly.

  Hollis didn't blink at her demand. He didn't say anything either. His broad shoulders shook first with the force of his silent laughter. It burst out of him like thunder, reverberating in the hollow interior of the nave. Tears formed at the corners of his eyes, and he eventually pulled out a handkerchief to wipe them away.

  She waited hi
m out calmly, and when his laughter faded, she said clearly, "In light of what you've done, Hollis, it's a reasonable request."

  He sobered. "What I've done?" he asked. "What have I done, Rennie?"

  "The night of the confrontation with my father in front of the board, you directed your friends to abduct me from my own home. I recognized James Taddy and Warren Beecher, and I heard them talking about you. I know that if things had gone badly for you at the meeting, you would have played me like a trump card, used me to give yourself time to get away."

  "I don't know what you're talking about."

  His denial was what she expected, and Rennie went on as if he hadn't spoken. "I kept thinking it was the act of a fearful man, and the more I thought about it, the more it surprised me. It appeared you were certain nothing in the ledgers would incriminate you, yet your actions that night would seem to indicate otherwise."

  Hollis pulled his legs in from the aisle. He was watching Rennie with a bit of wariness in his dark eyes, but he invited her to go on. "You tell a very good story," he said. "I'm intrigued. What is it that you think you've found?"

  She smiled. "Nothing about the Queen's Point project, Hollis. You covered for yourself quite thoroughly there. Quite cleverly, too. Everything points to Jay Mac and Seton Contracting." Rennie chastised Hollis with her expressive green eyes. "Seton Contracting? Seton... Stone. That was rather obvious, but then I suppose you meant it to be, isn't that right?"

  Hollis shrugged. He folded his arms across his chest. "This is your theory," he said. "You tell me."

  "All right, then. It was intentionally obvious. You wanted someone to see the connection. It pointed another finger at Jay Mac by drawing in my sister's husband. You've put Jarret in a bind. The evidence suggests that not only is Jay Mac guilty, but that he was in collusion with Jarret's best friend."

  "You should be telling this to the directors, Rennie, not to me. In fact, I would have no way of knowing any of this if you weren't sharing it with me now. Do you think I won't use it?"

  "You'd hear it all anyway," she said. "Jarret plans to make a full report. I thought this was a good time to meet with you." She looked around and gestured with her hand to indicate their surroundings. "And a good place."

  "Confession?" he asked, chuckling under his breath. "I don't think so. Any confessing I have to do will be done in there." He pointed to the confessionals a few feet from where he sat. He started to rise, finished with his conversation with Rennie. "It's been interesting, but—"

  Rennie didn't move. She raised her face to him. "Don't you want to hear about Juggler's Jump?"

  Hollis was caught halfway up, halfway down, and completely off guard. He hesitated a moment, then slowly sat down again. "What about Juggler's Jump?"

  "Hollis, I've been there. I've seen the wreckage firsthand. I know that what happened wasn't an accident."

  "It wasn't?" Both his eyebrows rose as he examined Rennie with new interest. "This is the first I've heard of it."

  "How can that be when you were responsible?" She held up her hand, stopping his reply when he would have denied it. "I've always suspected, Hollis, but the difficulty was in proving it. I know you didn't personally pull the coupling pins that derailed No. 412, but you hired the men that did."

  Hollis stood now. He towered over Rennie. "I've listened to you this long because what you've had to say has been amusing. That's no longer the case." He started to turn away, but Rennie reached for his coat sleeve and held on. He stopped and stared down at her hand, ready to brush her aside.

  "I wondered how you paid them," she said quickly, releasing him before he slapped her away. "I know you're not a wealthy man, Hollis, certainly not in the league where you can pay people to commit crimes for you and then keep paying them to stay quiet about it. At the back of my mind there was always the question of money. I thought you had used Queen's Point to funnel funds to yourself, but the records prove that wasn't the case. Three hundred thousand dollars you let sit in an account in my brother-in-law's name. If Jay Mac had died in the accident, you would have pulled it out, but when he didn't you had to leave it there.

  "Juggler's Jump must have cost you something, though. Quite a lot probably." Rennie's smile was sly, her demeanor one of a coconspirator. "And then I remembered something Jarret told me about the afternoon he left New York nearly a year ago. You sent Taddy and Richard and Warren to see him off, and they did it in grand fashion: ruining his gun hand and his livelihood, and taking the draft that Jay Mac had made out to him. The draft was for ten thousand dollars, Hollis. That's enough money to arrange for mass murder and a cover-up."

  He backed away from her and stepped into the aisle. "It's a theory unless you have proof."

  "You tendered the draft," she said. "I looked through Jay Mac's private accounts. This wasn't a draft drawn on the funds of Northeast, Hollis. He wrote it on his personal account, and when you took it to the bank and forged Jarret's signature it showed up again among my father's receipts. Jay Mac never knew the draft had been stolen and forged. He thought Jarret had collected his money long ago. Only I knew differently."

  Hollis shrugged. "So I exchanged the draft for cash. It doesn't prove I used the money to arrange an accident at Juggler's Jump."

  "It's a good start, though, don't you think? It's enough for the board to wonder what else you may have done. The draft ties you to Jarret's beating on the platform. It connects you to forgery. I'm afraid it goes to your tactics, Hollis. It gives a person pause when evaluating your character."

  He started to walk away. Rennie did not reach for him this time. She had already glimpsed the anger simmering just beneath his rigidly controlled expression. She raised her voice and summoned his attention that way. "Why did you use the draft when you had Nina's money at your disposal?"

  Hollis pivoted on the balls of his feet. One of his hands rested heavily on the shoulder of the pew. His fingertips pressed whitely against the wood. "Nina's money?" he asked, one corner of his mouth lifting derisively. "She had no money that your father didn't control. He kept all the house accounts, and he gave her an allowance."

  Rennie's mouth parted fractionally. "Oh, just like he did for my mother. That explains it, then. There wouldn't have been enough to finance a murder." She shied away, retreating a narrow step as Hollis looked as if he wanted to hit her.

  He glanced around the church again to make certain they were alone. "You remember what it was like to feel the flat of my hand," he said. "That's good, Rennie. Keep that in mind and stop throwing your groundless accusations at my head."

  "I remember your fists," she said. "And I'll say what I think. I'm showing you the courtesy of hearing it first. I plan to tell this all to the board." She paused a beat. "Unless..."

  "Unless?" he asked.

  "Unless you give me an equal say in running Northeast."

  Hollis's dark eyes narrowed. He thrust his hands in his pockets and rocked backed on his heels. "So we've come back to that."

  "It was my purpose in being here," she said calmly.

  He was thoughtful. "Who knows about the draft?" he asked.

  "Jarret knows it was taken, and he suspects you of arranging its theft, of course; but I haven't told him that I found it in Jay Mac's records." She sighed. "He's been so busy trying to connect you to Queen's Point that I'm quite afraid he overlooked everything else."

  "But not you," he said. "You were always clever, Rennie."

  Her smile was as insincere as Hollis's compliment.

  "Did you tell your husband you're here?" he asked.

  "I thought it was better to keep this between us."

  "An equal say in running Northeast," he said thoughtfully. "You don't think you're reaching a bit high?"

  "On the contrary. I may not be reaching high enough. You did try to have my father murdered, Hollis. Sixty people died in that derailment. That's your responsibility."

  A muscle worked in Hollis's square jaw. "Let's establish something right now," he said. "Juggler's Jump wa
sn't my idea. It was Nina's. It was a foolish plan from the beginning, and you're not laying responsibility for it at my feet."

  Rennie's mind worked furiously. She wasn't prepared for Hollis to shift the blame to Nina. "You went along with it," she said. "You financed it even though you didn't need to. You had everything already in place for Jay Mac's downfall, yet you agreed to Nina's plan."

  "That woman had me tied in knots." As soon as he said the words he wished he could have called them back. He saw Rennie's surprise, and it made him angry and caustic. "You wouldn't know anything about that, would you? How a person can get your thinking all tangled so that you'll do just about anything for them?"

  "Is that how it was for you with Nina?" she asked. "I thought you were using her."

  "Like I did you?" he asked. "No, it wasn't that way with Nina. Well, perhaps at first, but not as time went on. I came to love her... or need her... I'm not certain anymore what it was. In the beginning I thought our goals were the same, that we both wanted to wrest control of Northeast away from Jay Mac. It was true to a point; then Nina grew impatient and she wanted Jay Mac dead, not merely humiliated."

  Rennie was finding it difficult to breathe. "Her method almost succeeded. You nearly gained Northeast after Juggler's Jump. You had control of her interests in the company. You were still married to me, so you had control of mine as well. It almost worked for you."

  "It didn't, though. You found your father." His eyes settled hard on Rennie's pale face and bright eyes. "I'm not sorry about that, Rennie. I like Jay Mac. He gave me my first chance. I've always known that someday I wanted to be sitting where he is, but I never wanted him dead in order to do it."

  "How am I supposed to believe that?" she asked. "Someone tried to kill him at the train station the moment we returned. Are you telling me you didn't have anything to do with that?"

  "It was Nina."

  "She arranged it."

  "She did it. Jay Mac knows that. He told her the night he asked her for a divorce."

  Rennie frowned. "But how do you know that?" she asked softly. "Nina killed herself that night." Rennie's entire body stilled; then her eyes widened a fraction. "You were there, weren't you? She talked to you about what Jay Mac said." She saw it in his face then, the terrible truth that she had never suspected until just this moment. Rennie's knees buckled, and she sat down in the pew again. "Oh, my God, Hollis. You killed her."