I brush my fingertips across his cheekbones. This moment—this one moment between us—it’s so completely beautiful. I almost think it's a dream, but then his lips touch mine, and I know. I know that, for the first time, I'm not dreaming about him. I’m not wishing he were mine, because he is. He is actually with me. Loving me, kissing me, and I never want this moment to end.
He coaxes me down onto the blanket as he kisses my mouth. I am addicted to his lips. He pulls away, and I whimper in protest. “I didn’t bring you here to make out.” He smiles as I adjust my dress and sit up.
“Okay.”
He reaches over to the basket and pulls out a small box with a bow attached. “I want you to have this because it’s your birthday present, but I don’t want to explain it completely just yet. Okay?”
I meet his eyes, unsure of exactly what he means by explain it completely. I nod my head, remove the bow, and lift the lid off of the box. Inside, I find a silver box with various shapes of stars on the top. It’s beautiful. I’m unsure what it is, but it’s beautiful. I delicately touch the box all over as I feel the indents of inscription in the front of it. I turn it into my lap, but I can’t read it in the dark. I move to where the candles are brighter and read, For each star in the sky, I have a reason why I love you. When you look up at night, never forget this truth.
I look up at him, and he takes the box, flips it over and presses a button, which illuminate the stars. My breath catches as light comes out of each star shining on the blanket. I flip it over and realize it’s a nightlight of stars. “The idea is that no matter where I am, the stars will shine for you…to remind you of all the reasons why I love you. The reasons are endless. The stars will never disappear.”
Wow. No matter where he is? I don’t miss it, and that is what he means by not explaining it completely.
I don’t want to discuss his not being near either. “It’s beautiful, Josh. I love it.” I put it down and climb to my knees to give him a kiss. “No matter where you are, know that I’m looking up at those stars thinking of you and wishing we were counting them together.”
He stares at me for a long time, just touching my face, tracing around my features like he’s memorizing them. He sighs deep in his chest as he leans into my face. I meet him half way as we kiss, slow and deliberate. It’s not the desperate kiss. This kiss is passionate and full of the love we have for each other.
We spend a lot of time lying back on the blanket stargazing as he tells me just a few of the reasons why he loves me. Of course, I have many reasons in response. He’s right...the reasons are endless.
My phone pings from inside my purse. “Sorry.” I reach in and find a text from Emily.
Em: AT COLLIN’S. COME PLEASE. *PUPPY EYES
I laugh, and Josh looks at me puzzled. “Em went to Collin’s, and she wants me to come. Party time as usual I guess?”
“We can go. I told him that we might. I just didn’t want to commit since it’s your birthday.”
He’s lying back with his hands behind his head looking very comfortable. I crawl on top of his stomach, fold my hands under my chin and smile. “I think attending a party at Collin’s for the first time as Joshua Parkers girlfriend would be a ton of fun.”
He smirks. “Is that so?”
“M’hm. Perhaps you could take me upstairs, and we could have dessert.” I bite my lip and wait for my statement to click in his brain. There it goes... 3, 2, and 1.
He rolls me onto my back, pressing his hips into me. A soft moan escapes my lips. “Baby, I’m not making love to you in Collin’s bed. That’s like sharing you with other people, and I am not sharing you. Besides, when I love you for the first time, I want to take my time, to remember every sound you make as you respond to me…for it to be just us, no inhibitions and for our eyes and ears only.”
I smile, and tug his shirt to pull him to me. “I love you. I don’t care where it is, as long as I’m with you.”
He tucks my hair out of my eyes and studies my face. “I love you too, Riley. I want you...badly. I’m sure you can feel that.” I can feel him. “Not tonight, though. Okay? Not at his house, not in my truck, not here on this blanket. It needs to be special because you are special, and you deserve that.”
I nod and once again, wonder how I managed to get so lucky. Most guys don’t care where or how it happens, just as long as it does. Josh wants to cherish me.
“Let’s go before I try to change your mind,” I wink making him laugh.
He kisses my forehead, and we gather our stuff, blowing out the candles.
CHAPTER 14
On replay in my mind is the way Riley looked and felt last night in my truck as she shivered. The sounds she made when I touched her for the first time have me high. A high I never want to come down from.
I wake up on Collin’s couch feeling slightly hung-over. I have Riley’s body on top of mine. She wriggles a little, and I smile as I snuggle her tighter to me.
Collin walks in the door with a grocery bag and a smirk. “I’m glad y’all are dressed,” he says grinning.
“I heard that,” Riley says, groaning.
I laugh. She climbs up off of me and stands. I watch mesmerized as she stretches like a feline. I clear my throat and look away. It’s getting harder to breathe around her without taking everything she has.
“I’m not one of the skanky hoes you let roam this house at your parties, Collin,” Riley says.
Collin eyes flick to the balcony where his room is. I try to remember whom he took up there last night, but I don’t.
“I know that, Riley. I was just joking with y’all.” Collin says defensively.
“I’m going to the bathroom,” she says walking down the hall.
Collin actually looks sheepish all the sudden. It’s weird, and suddenly I care a lot about who he took upstairs last night. His eyes keep flicking up there. “Why do you look nervous?” I ask.
He looks at me and sets down the bag full of breakfast burritos. “I um, I sort of hooked up with someone that I’m sure I shouldn’t have.” He frowns and sits on the recliner with his head in his hands.
“Who? I already know it wasn’t Preslee, thanks for that by the way.” I say.
Last night, we were well on our way to having a kick ass graduation party when like the bitch she is, Preslee tried to crash it.
We were all standing in the yard drinking and having a good time when Preslee arrived with Laiken. Time froze and all eyes were on Riley. Turns out the head of the rumor mill had a name—Preslee. She was the one that had videoed us, then sent the video around. She apparently was also behind all of the notes. Needless to say, shit got real, and Riley wasn’t holding anything back with her anymore—not that she had before.
“You shouldn’t be here,” Collin said, “Only my friends are invited, and you aren’t on that list,” he added.
Preslee laughed. “Oh, I’m not your friend? Just a quick fuck when you need it? Real nice, Collin,” she snapped.
Riley was tipsy and a lot bolder. “Oh, my God. Is there anyone you haven’t fucked? You are such a slut,” she said.
“I’m a what?” Preslee shouted as the group of us laughed our asses off.
“Should you even be partying in your condition?” Riley asked her, ignoring her last question. I couldn’t agree more with her terminology for Preslee.
Preslee’s gaze raked up and down Riley with disgust, and she rolled her eyes. “And what condition is that exactly?” she asked full of irritation.
I debated on intervening, but it was entertaining seeing Riley handle her own. “Um, well let’s see...you being with child, bun in the oven, preggers or just plain fucked. However, you consider it? It’s a condition,” Riley said, gesturing to Preslee’s stomach.
Preslee smiles and bites her finger, “Oh that. Well, come to find out it was just a false positive. I’m good to do whatever I want.” She actually looked at me when she said want as if it were a possibility. That chick was crazy.
“WHAT!�
� WHAT!” Riley and I both said at the same time.
“Does Dean know?” Riley asked. Of course, that pissed me off. I wondered why she would care.
Preslee snorted, “Tsk tsk, Riley. Should you care about how your ex-boyfriend feels? I was kidding. I’m pregnant, but you know what’s good about that. I can fuck whomever I want—slow or hard—all fucking night—and I don’t have to worry about getting knocked up because your boyfriend already handled that. Oh, ex-boyfriend I mean.”
“You’re a fucking bitch!” Riley shouted throwing the remains of her drink in Preslee’s face.
Preslee squealed, and all of us stood their speechless with wide eyes.
“Preslee get the fuck off my property and leave Riley and Josh alone!” Collin gestured to her car.
Preslee ringed out her hair and wiped her face. “Seriously? You are choosing her over us, Collin?” Laiken asked, finally piping in.
Collin walked right up to both of them, “Yeah, I am. You’re right, neither of you were ever my friends. You were both just quick fucks that a lot of us enjoyed from time to time, but I’m done. Now leave!”
They did. The rest of the night was less drama. Just a few close friends having a good time together.
“Hey, what time did Emily leave last night? I don’t even remember her telling me bye.” Riley says, walking back in the room, not allowing enough time for Collin to tell me who he hooked up with.
Collin’s eyes dart to mine, and in an instant I know.
Riley has her phone in her hand. She clicks a few buttons and then puts the phone up to her ear. The ringing starts—the ringing we all hear—because it’s coming from upstairs.
Her eyes cut to the shut door above the balcony and then widen. She looks back to Collin, “You didn’t?”
Collin looks down. Oh damn.
“Hello?” She says into the receiver. “Hey, Em. Sleep well?” Pause “I’m not yelling. You never told me bye last night. I got worried since Josh and I crashed on the couch.”
“OH, MY GOD! Where the hell are my clothes?” We hear Emily shout from upstairs.
“She hung up on me.” Riley says dropping her phone to the coffee table. “Is this breakfast? Awesome. I’m starved,” she says grabbing a burrito.
Collin and I exchange a look, as Riley acts nonchalantly as she bites into her breakfast burrito.
“You’re not mad?” Collin asks.
Riley’s eyes harden, “Oh, I’m fucking pissed, Collin. But Emily is a big girl, and she makes her own decisions.” She sets her burrito down and leans forward, “But if I hear you refer to my best friend as a quick fuck in any future conversations with anyone, I will cut your balls off and hang them for the pit bulls next door to devour. K?”
Holy Shit!
Collin just stares in disbelief at Riley as she picks up her burrito and devours it. “Thanks for breakfast. I will be upstairs helping my best friend find her clothes before she does the walk of shame.” Then she leaves.
“Damn, dude,” Collin says.
“I know, right. She is amazing,” I say.
“What are you going to do in a few weeks without her?” he asks. We got our schedules, and we have summer drills in July that I haven’t yet told Riley about. Shit, I haven’t told Riley anything about any of it yet, even though I know she knows.
I run my hand across my face, “Go crazy,” I answer truthfully.
It’s been an amazing two weeks for Riley and me, even with the looming fate nearby, as I have to leave in a few weeks. We’ve been actively doing things outside of her bedroom and mine, purposely avoiding the temptation of going further. I’m not sure what we are waiting for, but it’s just not the right time yet. So we hang out. We go to the movies, and we swim at the lake, which let’s face it—seeing her in a bikini is distracting and just as tempting, but we’ve been good—until today.
Her mom and sister left to go to Sugar Lake earlier today for a weekend away. Riley stayed behind due to Beau’s wedding tomorrow. We get the weekend to ourselves in a hotel in San Antonio, separate of course. We leave tomorrow and for tonight we are behaving.
“I hate my hair,” she gripes staring at herself in the mirror as I watch her try to tame her curls. She just took a shower, and my mind starts imagining what Riley looks like wet and lathered in soap. Shit!
Clarification—trying to behave.
I reach for the brush and come to stand behind her. “Let me.” I meet her eyes in the mirror. She smiles. I love her smile.
I take to brushing my girlfriend’s hair, and it’s the best damn feeling in the world. I don’t know why. It just gives me a warming sensation in my chest. So does the way she breathes shallowly when I’m this close to her. So does the way she stares at me in the mirror with a look of wonder. I love that she is affected by me.
“There. You’re beautiful and tangle free.” I say as I place the brush on the dresser in front of her. I rest my chin on her shoulder and stare at her in the mirror. “We look great together, huh? We are so going to make some awesome looking babies together one day.” She laughs. I love her laugh, too.
She rolls her eyes. “You’re so crazy.” She wiggles away and starts putting away folded clothes from the basket next to her dresser. I laugh, as she seems flustered.
I lean against her dresser with my ankles crossed and ask amused, “Watcha doing?”
“Laundry,” she says grabbing a handful of undergarments to place in the top drawer next to me. I visually begin exploring the lot of them.
“Nice,” I say as I reach in the drawer to retrieve ivory silk and bring it to my nose. She gasps and snatches them out of my hand.
“Oh, my God, perv. Give those back. They probably smell like downy soft not pussy.”
Holy shit! As soon as the word leaves her mouth, her cheeks flame the sexiest shade of pink and her hand covers her mouth. My eyes dart to her in surprise. “Oh hell, you said the p word.”
She puts her head down and starts fiddling with the laundry again. “It wasn’t on purpose. I just...ugh...go over there,” she says, shooing me with her hand.
I can’t help but chuckle at her innocence on some things. I love it...a lot to be honest. I sit down on her bed and rest back comfortably with my hands behind my head. She can’t meet my eyes. She’s embarrassed. “What’s the big deal with you and saying stuff like that? You say fuck all the time, and that doesn’t bother you.”
As if her cheeks couldn’t get any sexier with her blushing, she turns to glare at me. Her hands on her hips and her head tilted to the side. “For your information, Josh, I say fuck in a different context—like you’re so fucking stupid or what the fuck? I don’t say, fuck like, I want you to fuck me, Josh,” she says in one deep breath. Damn.
She looks away. Everything in her statement and her body language tells me that it is what she wants though. “But you do, though?”
“Do what?”
I reach out and grab her hand, pulling her to the bed, where I flip her to her back and breathe in the scent of her by her neck. She shivers. I breathe the words into her ear, “Want me to fuck you. It’s written in your eyes. You might not have said it...sober that is, but you do want it. Don’t you?” She whimpers as I reach my hand under her shirt and feel her skin.
“Yes,” she answers breathlessly.
I pull back to study her eyes, and I see her answer. That edge of decision is no longer there. She wants me. She is ready to take this step, but am I? I claim her mouth, cherishing it, tasting every bit of her sweetness. She is so damn delicious. I can never get enough. When we pull apart, out of breath, I lock eyes with hers and grin. “I guess we have a problem then,” I state full of mischief.
Her eyes lift in question. “Why’s that?”
I roll off of her and feign unaffected, “Because, I’m not that easy.”
She laughs, and the sound of it is like music—a symphony of angels singing. “You are ridiculously crazy, Parker.” She snuggles up to my shoulder as I wrap an arm around her. She drape
s her leg over my waist, and we both sigh in contentment.
“I can’t help it. You make me crazy, but in a good way, of course.” I admire her eyes. Today, they are more green than blue. Gorgeous.
She begins to rub circles on my stomach under my shirt. “So, tomorrow will be our first wedding together. You promise to try not and propose to me? I know it’s going to be tough being as though you love me so much and stuff.” She grins.
I smile and shake my head, “Now, you are crazy.” I peck her lips. “For now, you are safe, but I make no promises on the future of non-proposals. We have a forever future to plan, remember? A wedding is just another moment of practicing for us.”
She smiles and nods, and then we spend the next several minutes reminding each other’s mouths of how crazy in love for each other we are.
Moments later, we are lying on her bed listening to music. She has my shirt lifted, and she’s writing something on my chest with a pen. It tickles, and I’m curious about what she is writing. She places a soft kiss to where my heart is and then she lowers my shirt and climbs back into her spot. “Done,” she says.
“What did you write?” I ask grinning at her.
“You will see it when you get undressed later. Don’t peek until then. Promise?”
“Promise.”
She rolls onto her back and places her head into the crook of my shoulder and neck. She lifts my hand into the air and interlaces our fingers. I pull our intertwined hands to my lips and kiss them. She begins to hum along with City and Colour.
I have my other hand dangling off the bed, and Tink is rubbing her body against it. I decide to be stupid as I scoop her up onto the bed.
I open my mouth and wait for her horror, “I never thought I’d be the kind of guy to say this but...I really love your pussy—,”
She jumps up and stares down at me, “WHAT?”
I laugh because she didn’t let me finish, and I knew that would be her reaction. She can be so predictable about some stuff. Tink meows and I point to her, “Cat, Riley. I was going to say I really love your pussycat.” I tap my index finger to her nose. “You have such a dirty mind, pretty girl.” I laugh at her shocked face that is a pretty pink color again. I love it when she blushes. I don’t know what it is about that word and her.
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