Touch Me When We're Dancing

by Suzanne Jenkins

  “Not at all. I’m still known as Mrs. Smith around town. Jack’s legacy is not going to fade away anytime soon.”

  “I’m so sorry. I should have acknowledged his death when it happened, not all this time later.”

  “It’s perfectly fine. I meet old acquaintances of his all the time. If we had to acknowledge every death, that’s all we’d do.”

  “Would you like a cup of tea?” she asked, seemingly uncomfortable. “I’m just going to have some myself.”

  “Okay, if it’s no trouble,” Pam answered, unwinding the scarf from around her neck. What would she have to talk about with this woman? She’d better feign interest in her.

  “When Ted told me you were going to rent his place this morning, for some reason I didn’t think he meant today.”

  “It did happen fast. I only decided to try it when I saw the ad in the flyer. Exquisite beachfront property available for just the discriminating person. It’s when having MD after my name makes the biggest difference. I could be a maniac, but if I’m a doctor…”

  “I never thought of that,” Pam said, trying not to judge her arrogance.

  A phone beeped, and Marian Cooper looked at hers. “Must be yours,” she said.

  Pam reached over to her coat draped over a kitchen chair and dug through the pocket for hers. “I’d better look at this. My husband will be wondering where I am.”

  Sure enough, he’d texted her. Where are you?

  Happy for the distraction of Marian Cooper, Pam texted him back. Next door with Ted’s new tenant. Will be home shortly.

  “I’d better bypass the tea,” Pam said when it appeared Marian Cooper had forgotten about it.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. I never entertain, so I don’t do this very well. I hope you’ll come back.”

  “I’d love to. I’ll take a rain check,” Pam said, pulling her coat on again. “It was nice meeting you. Enjoy your first night on the beach. It can get pretty noisy with the wind, and at high tide, expect the windows to be wet.”

  “Okay, I will. Thank you for coming over.”

  Marian held the door for Pam, and she fought the wind to get back over the dune to her house. She turned once to wave goodbye, and Marian was still standing there, watching, and waved back.

  When Pam made it over the dune, Randy was waiting in the veranda for her, and as soon as she got close enough, he opened the door.

  “Jeez, what a night! It was clear and still in town.”

  “I think we’re in for a storm,” she said. “A nor’easter. I heard on the news.”

  He helped her with her coat, and the schism between them was so obvious it was painful. Grabbing her as soon as the coat was off, Randy was ready to do anything to bridge the gap.

  She stiffened up like a board in his lanky arms, even his touch angering her.

  “Oh, darling, don’t let this come between us. It’s nothing. Sandra means nothing to me. I usually can’t stand to be in the same room with her. When I saw her, it was like I was watching a robot. I swear to you she doesn’t appeal to me, I have no desire for her, she’d can’t touch us. We’ll be using her because she’s beautiful, like a statue.”

  “You have to allow me time to think about this, Randy. I don’t think you’re grasping the full extent of what this means to me. Sandra saw Jack’s body before I did the day he died. She was in the room with the nurse. She was pregnant with his baby. He made her a full partner in his will. The entire law office knew about the changes he’d made before I did. I let her have a place in my life because, at the time, there didn’t seem to be an alternative. Jack wanted her there, so there she was.

  “I didn’t ask you to buy her out. You did that on your own. I’m still not sure where you fit into the attack Clint made on her—”

  “You don’t know for sure it was Clint—” he interrupted.

  “Randy, stop!” Pam put her hands up, her frustration level growing so large she wasn’t sure she was going to be able to control her emotions.

  He took her hands and held them to his chest. “Pam, what can I do that will satisfy you? I already offered to bow out of the production.”

  “We’ve based your retirement on you having the show to do. I don’t want you to bow out.”

  She pulled away from him again and paced the floor, feeling unreasonably selfish. But she had to have her way this time.

  “I want Sandra out. I’m going to call Peter and tell him, as his partner, she’s not to use the offices or the staff. If he doesn’t comply, I’m going to sue him and shut the whole place down.”

  “That’s your call as a partner,” Randy said, turning his face so she couldn’t see his shocked expression. “It will make it easier on me if you confront him.”

  The sound of the front door opening and little children running ended the dialogue for now.

  “I forgot Lisa was coming. They were moving today,” she said.

  “Hey, where is everyone?” Lisa called.

  “We’re back here in the kitchen,” Pam replied, walking out to meet them. “I expected you earlier today.”

  “It took longer than they thought, as usual. But everything is moved. It’s chaos, but at least we’re in our new space.”

  “I can’t wait to see it,” Pam said. “I was out earlier, but it’s a bit too cold for little guys on the beach.”

  “Granny, we’re living at the beach now,” Megan said.

  “Well, come on in and we’ll order pizza for dinner.”

  Lisa didn’t reply, thinking she could have ordered pizza on her own. What was going on with her mother? There was a time when she’d have a four-course meal prepared nightly.

  “You know, Mom, I’m not really in the mood for pizza. Could we fix something else?”

  “Lisa, frankly, I’ve had a bit of an upset this evening. I don’t feel like cooking. But be my guest. You know where the stove is.”

  “What happened?” Lisa asked, gathering the kids’ coats. “Order the pizza, then.”

  This was a first in Lisa’s memory. It was bad enough that she’d been ordering lunch even, but to offer pizza to her grandchildren when she’d known for a week that they’d be coming by was a new low for Pam.

  Before she answered, she closed the door to the hallway that led to the children’s wing. Randy had been using Brent’s old room for his office, and when he heard Lisa coming, he retreated to it, like a child hiding away.

  “To make a long story short, one of Randy’s producers happened to see Sandra at Lang today and asked her to host the show Randy was going to produce about New York architecture.”

  “Sandra, the seductress,” Lisa said. “Why was she even there? I thought someone bought her out.”

  “Someone did. However, Peter let her use the office and his staff. I’m going to put a stop to it. I was going to call Peter in the morning, but I think I’ll call Dan instead. He’ll act as my representative to the other attorneys. I can’t stand any of them.”

  “No wonder you don’t want to cook,” Lisa said.

  “Let me order that pizza,” Pam said, distracted. “Put a video in for your children before they destroy the place. Where’s Brent, anyway?”

  “With his father, as he should be,” Lisa said. “He doesn’t let him out of his sight for too long, and I had enough on my plate today without watching him, too.”

  “What happened to the nanny?”

  “She left early today because of the weather.”

  “God forbid parents have to watch their own children,” Pam said, looking for the pizza place menu.

  “Mother, what is that supposed to mean?” Lisa asked, stunned at Pam’s recrimination.

  “What?” she said, looking up from the phone.

  “You know, forget it. I’d rather go out for pizza anyway.”

  She went into the den and wrestled her children back into their coats, seething. But her mother seemed unaware, definitely preoccupied.

  “Thanks for stopping by,” Pam said, relieved. “The next time you v
isit, hopefully life will have calmed down.”

  “There will always be something, Mother,” Lisa said. “I would have thought by now you’d be rolling with the punches.”

  That comment ignited Pam’s fury.

  “No, I don’t think I will anymore. You were my most vocal critic after Daddy died. You accused me of sticking my head in the sand. It was the first time I’d heard that expression. Here I was, mourning the loss of your father, and you said those words to me.

  “I’m not going to do it anymore. I’m faced with a crisis and you’re worried about eating. Go eat!”

  “Mother, are you sure you’re okay? I feel like you’re overreacting. You invited us for dinner, remember? When I told you we were moving today, your exact words were come over and we’ll have dinner together.”

  “Lisa, please just go. I don’t want to argue with you. I’m definitely not up to whatever is going on right now. Let’s move beyond it, please.”

  Buttoning up Marcus’s coat, Lisa stood up and looked at Pam. She moved to her and kissed her cheek. “I’ll talk to you later.”

  “Goodnight, children,” Pam said, patting them on the heads.

  “Is Granny cranky?” Dan Junior asked.

  “You could say that,” Lisa muttered.

  Lisa herded the children back out to the car. When she got behind the wheel, she texted Tim to meet her at their new house, they’d be camping on mattresses on the floor, and then she called Shore Pizza and ordered enough food to get them through a day or two. Daniela could shop in the morning.

  The feelings Lisa had regarding Pam were a double-edged sword. On one hand, she felt slighted and childish that Pam had disregarded her needs. They were making a huge move to be closer to her, and the first opportunity that she had to show Lisa her appreciation was a bust.

  But on the other hand, she was proud of Pam for standing up to what was happening with Randy and Sandra. And she couldn’t wait to tell Tim about it. If Sandra landed the coup, a visible acceptance of her by respected businesses, it would make her a better candidate for regaining custody of Brent. He might have a tougher road ahead of him to keep Brent away from her.

  After herding the children into the pizza parlor to pick up their dinner and then get them into the car without dropping anything, they made the trek back to the beach. It appeared that the forecast was correct. Snow started to fall, just a few flakes on the trip home, and by the time she pulled into the garage, which was half packed with boxes, it was a blizzard.

  The house was drafty, rocking with the wind, and once she got her coat off, she flicked the gas starter on in the fireplace packed with logs. Each child had a backpack with pajamas and a change of clothes for the next day, and the next minutes were spent encouraging them to change.

  “When you have your PJs on, we’ll eat.”

  “When will Uncle Tim get here?” Megan asked.

  “He should walk through that door any second,” Lisa answered.

  They were sitting around the kitchen table with slices of pizza and chicken nuggets when the front door opened and Tim and Brent walked through, accompanied by his literary agent and girlfriend, Elizabeth, and her infant.

  Taking a deep breath, Lisa wasn’t expecting her and felt unreasonably aggravated that she’d come. Weren’t things chaotic enough?

  “Wow, that snow!” Elizabeth said, shaking flakes off her head.

  Lisa grabbed a paper towel and gave it to her, forcing a smile.

  “I hope we don’t lose power,” Tim said, putting Brent down. “Sorry we’re late. I wanted to sweep the house out in case we couldn’t get back tomorrow. The forecast says six to eight inches, but I bet it’s more than that.”

  “Here’s pizza,” Lisa said, pointing to boxes and bags on the counter.

  It seemed like the pizza was the main topic for her, the cause of a fight with her mother and now to stop Tim’s assessment of the weather. She hoped Elizabeth would jump in for a change and contribute something instead of acting like a guest. Perhaps Lisa’s pregnancy was to blame for her orneriness, and not everyone else. The thought popped into her head just as the phone beeped. It was Ryan.

  Without an explanation, Lisa disappeared into the back of the house where the master bedroom was. The movers had put her bed together, and the bare mattress looked so inviting, she lay down on it and answered the call.

  “Are you snowed in yet?” he asked.

  “Not yet. I moved today.”

  “You did? To the beach?”

  “Yep, a few houses down from my mom.”

  “I was thinking about you,” he said. “I miss you.”

  “I’m sorry, Ryan.”

  She didn’t want to feed into his manipulation, so she didn’t return the feelings. She missed him, too. She longed for him. But he wasn’t safe to have around her children.

  “Is Tim there?”

  “Yes. With Elizabeth, no less.”

  “Wow, he doesn’t have a brain in his head, does he?”

  “I told him he’ll have to marry her now. His book isn’t even done yet and it’s already on the New York Times bestsellers list. Maybe he’s waiting for the release and then he’ll ditch her. He’s not saying much.”

  “When can I see you?” Ryan asked.

  “You know that’s not a good idea,” she said.

  “Let me come there and see the new place at least. I want to see your belly.”

  “Alison is getting big. She’s over seven months now.”

  “I guess I’m going in the delivery room with her and Davey boy,” Ryan said.

  “He’s good to her, Ryan. You should be nicer to him.”

  “Hey, I’m very respectful. The last time I was there, I called him sir,” he said, cackling. “How far away are you from her?”

  “My house is halfway between hers and Pam’s. It’ll be good for the kids.”

  “If I can get there tomorrow, I’m coming,” he said. “What’s your address?”

  Against her better judgment, she gave it to Ryan. At least during the day there would be no chance for more than a friendly visit. Her libido was out of control since she was pregnant, too, which made her think she was having a boy. When she was pregnant with Megan, the sight of a penis gagged her. But with Marcus, she was jumping Dan all the time. Now with no opportunity for it, she longed for male arms around her body. Having Ryan close by might be a problem.

  “Just so you know, Dan and Julie are going to be here sometime this weekend.”

  “That’s no problem for me,” he said.

  With Pam’s help, Jack’s old Madison Avenue apartment where Ryan now lived had been redecorated. It was a soothing retreat in soft grays, greens and taupe. All the nineteen seventies yellow and floral was history, the yellow carpeting ripped up and oak flooring put down. It was modern, yet serene. On the night Sandra had visited him, she was the critic who gave the space the thumbs-up.

  “After being in jail, this is very nice,” she said, walking through the apartment.

  “How does it compare to Michael Bennett’s palatial SoHo penthouse? I wanted to barf when I saw that tabloid cover.”

  “Michael Bennett’s apartment reminds me of what a newly single, middle-aged guy would think a bachelor pad should look like.”

  “So you like this place better?”

  “I was only here once before. And not with Jack.”

  “How’d that come about?”

  “I met Pam here for lunch on a weekend and her son, Brent, was here. God, I haven’t talked about that day in a long time. No one would have believed me anyway.”

  “Did he rape you?” Ryan asked.

  “Yes,” she said shortly. “But we’ll never speak of it because I don’t want my son to know. I want him growing up to believe that he was loved and wanted by his father.”

  “Good luck with that,” Ryan said.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “How do you think you’re going to pull that off? You don’t have any history with th
e man, nothing to show his child. Wouldn’t it be better to say you had a one-night stand? Plus, hopefully the kid will learn to count, and when he finds out his father was killed exactly nine months to the day he was born, that’s not a lot of time for him to be excited about the stork.”

  “You’re really despicable,” she hissed.

  “I only speak the truth. Why did you call me, anyway?”

  “I needed a friend, but I guess I chose wrong. Michael is grieving. Tim is nowhere to be found, and Lisa and Pam won’t answer my calls, so you’re the lucky winner.”

  “I have my own problems,” Ryan said.

  “And what might they be?” she asked, forgetting that his girlfriend had sliced her wrists in that very apartment.

  “Nothing for you to worry about. You’re welcome to stay here. The guest bedroom is in good shape, thanks to Pam. Feel free to stay over. I’m exhausted, so I’ll say goodnight.”

  “I thought we could party,” Sandra said, desperate.

  “No, not tonight. I couldn’t get it up if you were carrying a whip.”

  “I’ll leave,” she replied and, not wasting any time, walked out of Ryan’s life for good.

  They’d made a date for dinner, but she canceled. He didn’t know if Sandra was aware of Lisa’s pregnancy, and he wasn’t about to tell her.

  He’d started dating Jennifer, the receptionist, again, and doing it right this time, no funny stuff, just dinners and shows; he even took her flowers once. She was lovely and fun, but he didn’t love her. And then he thought maybe he could. But he felt like he was wasting her time. Peter had tried to put the kibosh on it.

  “Don’t mess with the staff,” Peter had said.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Now that you’re in a front office, lay off Jennifer. We have enough problems here without a sexual-harassment lawsuit.”

  So he’d cooled it off, seeing her on the sly, and she was okay with it. When he could, he spent the weekends with Pam. Now that Randy was back from Greece, he’d do what he could do make himself indispensable to Randy, too. He needed a family, faux or not.

  Chapter 4

  Without a care in the world, Sandra stuffed her briefcase with files and new contracts, unconsciously smiling. A handsome, sexy man in a fabulous penthouse in SoHo was waiting to take her to their new favorite restaurant—Gracie’s on the Way. Once she got home, she’d have to work the rest of the night, but it would be worth it in the long run. Just as she was pulling her coat on, with all the excitement of a life well loved, Peter opened the door.