When Our Worlds Ignite (An Our Worlds Spin-Off Book 1)

by Lindsey Iler

  “No more than they already are?” I say, an obvious starkness in my tone. She opens her mouth to protest or give an excuse to her back and forth behavior, but I cut her off, raising my hand to stop her. “Just go to bed, Violet. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  When I’m alone, I plop down on the couch and take a deep breath.

  What the fuck am I going to do?

  “No, Mom. I’m not even in the city,” I say into my phone as I walk down the stairs. Dan pokes his head out of the kitchen, waves, and then disappears. His presence distracts me. I don’t even hear what she says. “Mom, seriously, I can’t deal with this right now. I have my own stuff to worry about. Let me call you back.” I can’t worry about your and Dad’s shit when I have my own pressing matter downstairs whipping up breakfast.

  My feet drag me into the kitchen. “Good morning.” I scratch my head as if I just woke up.

  “How’d you sleep?” Dan flips a few pancakes onto a plate.

  “Like shit,” I answer. A game of toss and turn kept me up most of the night.

  “Me, too.” His voice is laced with the sadness I caused. Hearing its presence grips my heart, serving as a reminder of how I left things between us last night.

  “Can, um, we, uh, well, talk?” I ask. “Outside maybe?”

  Dan follows me to the back deck, and I sit on the top step that leads to the back yard. The brisk morning air on my face is welcome. His hand lands on my knee, and he shakes it.

  “So, what’s up?” he asks, hoping to stop the awkwardness from creeping between us. It’s ever present. I’m not sure what could make it disappear.

  “I love you, but I don’t even know who I am anymore.” I shake my head, hoping to ward off tears. I feel like an alcoholic admitting I have a problem. It’s a cry for help.

  “I know who you are.” His shoulder sways into mine, and I smile.

  “If only it were that easy, Dan.” I clasp my hands together and rest my elbows on my knees. The lake is a perfect distraction, a way of avoiding looking at him. “I’m not sure when, but a lot has happened, and what I need right now is for you to be my friend. I can’t . . .” My chest heaves for relief, and I grip at my t-shirt. “I need you to be my friend. That’s a really shitty thing to ask of someone who’s in love with you, but I need you.” I bow my head. “Dan,” I wipe the stream of tears from my cheeks, “I need you.”

  His warmth wraps around me, and my body slumps into his arms. He kisses the top of my head, and I sigh in relief.

  “You have me. We were friends before we started dating, Vi. If the only way I can have you is as a friend, then I’ll take it, because nothing’s felt right these past months. None of it,” he whispers into my hair.

  Just as he is for me, I’d be there for him if the shoe was on the other foot. Our history is too deep. We’d never truly be able to turn our backs on each other.

  We sit in silence for almost a half an hour. The whole time, I question what I’m saying and what I’m doing, but I know, even though it hurts, I’m doing the right thing. For the both of us. At least for now, I’ll know I’m not leading Dan into something I’m not ready for.

  “Should we go finish making breakfast?” I stand and pull Dan with me, offering a bright smile to try to get us both to relax.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I see his lips moving. Is he talking to himself? His right hand makes a slight gesture when I step in front of him. He’s irritated. Rightfully so after you friend-zoned him.

  Back inside the house, I mix the batter, and Dan heats the two pans resting on the stove. We stay quiet as we work. Bacon goes in the oven, and plates are set on the table.

  Before I take my first bite, I blurt, “Maybe I should still leave early.” My uncertainty rears its ugly head again. Unlike before, my actions are selfish driven. This is going to be too difficult for him.

  Let him be the judge of that.

  “What?” Dan drops his fork, making a loud clanking noise. I jump from the interruption. His hand covers mine possessively. “You aren’t leaving.”

  “How do you expect this to work, huh? We’re barely talking to each other and its only breakfast.”

  “It’s going to take me longer than an hour to adjust to the fact that what I thought was going to happen between us, isn’t now.” His words sting when they hit.

  “I understand, and that’s why I think it’s best I leave before it gets even more weird between us.” I stare over at him. His arms cross over his chest, and he looks at me in disbelief. “Dan, being around you is confusing. I want to climb in your lap and push you away, at the same time.” Don’t even think about it, little lady. His skin on your skin will only confuse you more.

  “Violet, do you want us to be friends?”

  “Of course, I do.”

  “Then quit being a pain in the ass. Eat your delicious pancakes and then go get into your swimsuit. We’re going to the water park.”

  “The water park?”

  “Yes, the water park, where laughter is bound to happen.” He grins.

  “You’re a rather persistent idiot, you know that?”

  “An idiot who is determined not to allow you to push me or anyone else away. If you can’t figure out yourself with your friends by your side, then how can you?” He scoops up the last remnants of his pancakes.

  “You’re sweet.” I jump from my chair, encouraged by how he’s acting, wrap my arms around his shoulders, and squeeze. His words carry a sense of hopefulness. Let’s hope it doesn’t fade. “You can do the dishes. I need to shave my legs.”

  “Violet, we may be friends, but I’m not your girlfriend. Spare me the gory details of what it takes to make you look like you.” He ghosts his hand over the length of my body.

  I back out of the kitchen until I’m on the bottom step. “I’ll be down in like thirty. Will you be ready?” I shout, leaning over to get a glimpse of him.

  “Yeah, and Violet?” His eyes frost over with an unrecognizable emotion.

  “What?”

  “It’s nothing. I’ll see you in a bit.” He waves me off and turns back to the sink.

  I run up the stairs and dive onto the bed. My hand stretches to the bedside table for my phone to call Amanda.

  “This better be important. It’s too early to be calling me unless you’re bleeding. Are you bleeding, Violet?”

  “I’m not, but I need advice and to yell at you.” The string on my pajama shorts falls victim to my restless fingers.

  “Call Kennedy. She’s the advice giver, not me.” She yawns in the phone. “Hell, call Rico. He’s better at it than me, too. As for yelling at me, I’d apologize, but I’m not sorry.”

  “You really sold it with the packed suitcase by the way and I don’t need their kind of advice. I need yours,” I ramble.

  A stirring sound comes through the phone.

  “What you’ll want to do is relax your throat. Hum a little tune, if you need to. I suggest Twinkle-Twinkle.”

  “Not that kind of advice,” I yell. Wait a second. “But does that really work? Oh, never mind. It doesn’t matter anyway. The next time that happens, let’s just say, it’ll be awhile from now.”

  “That’s the only advice I’m capable of this early in the morning.”

  “Be serious for like two seconds, please,” I beg. “Dan and I are . . .” I pause.

  “Spit it out.” Amanda’s demanding personality is something I love about her.

  “Can Dan and I be friends?” I ask, ashamed I need someone to tell me the answer.

  “Oh, boy. What is with you and Kennedy? It’s like you’re incapable of understanding yourselves and the men who love you.”

  “Easy for you to say, Amanda I’m-never-going-to-settle-down Drims.” I sneer.

  “Touché.” She laughs. “You and Dan can be friends, but it will take work. You can’t go jumping his bones or looking at him like he’s a piece of steak.” There’s a long pregnant pause. “I’ve got to ask, though. Why are you and Dan just friends?”
>
  “Have you ever felt like you don’t know who you are? You look in the mirror, and everything seems the same, but something doesn’t feel right?” The question is futile for a girl like Amanda. She’s the most secure, confident girl I know.

  “I don’t, but that doesn’t mean I won’t ever find myself in your shoes. You’ve got to straighten your shit out. Get happy, girl. You only have one life.”

  “You sound like Richard.”

  “He’s one hell of a doorman.” Her giggle tickles my ear. “Now, let my ass go back to sleep.”

  “I love you.” I laugh with her.

  “I love you, too, and Violet, try to relax. Have some fun. Remember, when you get back, you’re jobless, so you might as well enjoy your time away.”

  “Thanks a lot.” The line goes silent. “Did you hang up on me?” I pull the phone from my ear, and the screen says, ‘Call Ended.’ “Bitch,” I whisper, tossing my phone at my feet.

  My shower is quick. The crisp air on my damp skin is refreshing. It’s September, for Christ’s sake. Much different temperature from here to New York. The heat will start taking a toll on my hair. Luckily, I’ve found a stylist who has somehow concocted a way of taming the wild, red beast. Let’s just hope it holds for the remainder of the trip.

  I throw on my bathing suit with a pair of shorts and a tank top. After slipping my flip flops on, I squeeze the door handle.

  “You can do this. The alternative is losing him, and that can’t happen.”

  *****

  “I’m so happy we decided to do this,” I say as I stuff my wet towel under my arm and sling the bag over my shoulder.

  Dan slips his shirt over his head, guiding his arms through the sleeves. Don’t look at him like he’s a piece of meat, remember?

  “You ready to go?” The way Dan’s eyes rake boldly over me has me on edge in a good way. “We needed today, didn’t we?” My cheek rests on his bicep. It’s something I’ve done a hundred times, but it feels different now. Friendlier. More complicated.

  “We did.” The sparkle in his eyes makes me think he’s enjoying himself a little too much. “Now, let’s get back.”

  The drive home is as relaxed as the entire day has been. As Dan drives through the winding roads, every few minutes I glance at him. He looks different, but he’s still Dan. I’ve ridden shotgun too many times not to pick up on his habits in the car. The rhythmic way he drums his thumbs on the steering wheel. How he holds the steering wheel with both hands when he takes a turn as if he’s afraid he’ll lose control.

  “It’s like I know everything about you. You’re so familiar,” I blurt out loud. The moment the words leave my lips, I regret them. They sound intimate, straight from the mouth of a girl in love.

  Dan pulls onto the shoulder and turns to me. His arm drapes over the back of the bench seat. A finger wraps into the ends of my hair.

  “I shouldn’t have said anything.” My attempt to take the words back is pointless. “It’s like I’m stuck between the old us and the new us.” In seconds, the door handle and my hand connect, and I jump from the cab of the truck. Dan’s gentle touch on my forearm stops my escape as I approach the hood.

  “Where are you going?” he asks. “Running away, are we? Is that how we deal with this? We run away now?” His shallow breaths beat a melody in my ear.

  “I can’t do this.” My lungs beg for air. He’s too close. I’m too confused. “I don’t know how you’re keeping your cool. We’ve spent the entire day together, and all I could think about is how . . .” My eyes move up to his broad chest. “Is how—”

  “Is how, what, Vi? Spit it out because I think I know what you’re going to say, but I’d hate to assume.” He bites the corner of his tongue. His eyes fill with lust.

  “Assume,” I say confidently.

  Before I can even take a breath, Dan scoops me up, and my legs wrap around his waist. My ass hits the hood, and it buckles under my measly weight. Dan’s nose buries in my neck. His lips trace along the length.

  “You aren’t the only one pretending, Vi.” His breath is warm on my skin. “Earlier in the kitchen, I called out your name. It wasn’t just because I like the sound of it on my tongue.” His next words will change everything. “I can pretend like I’m okay with us just being friends, but it’s a lie, Violet. I wanted to tell you, no matter what, I’ll still love you.”

  I grab the sides of his face, my fingers dancing through his hair. Our lips brush, and hunger wages war in my heart. His tongue skates over my bottom lip, and everything is forgotten. Our kiss deepens, and Dan pushes against me. His arm wraps around my waist as he slides me down the hood until I’m perfectly in his arms. He carries me to the bed of the truck. With his free hand, he pulls the hatch and sets me down without breaking our bodies apart. He crawls his entire length on top of me and grins.

  “What’s the smile for?” My head leans back so I can gaze into his eyes.

  “This is going to screw everything up, isn’t it?” The back of his hand skates down the side of my face, tickling the skin.

  “Maybe, but right now, I don’t care.”

  He swallows hard, trying to come up with a reason why this shouldn’t happen. A part of me wants to stop this for his sake. Put him out of his misery because it’s not fair. Laying down for him is cruel, but his lips feel too good. His body feels too familiar to walk away.

  My hand reaches between our bodies to untie his damp board shorts.

  “Are you sure?” he rasps.

  “No, but we’ll deal with it in the morning.” My lips skim the corner of his mouth. He takes it as an invitation.

  His hand rests on the side of my face, brushing my hair away. The only touch that feels like a piece of art. Romantic. Inspired. Something only Dan’s capable of. His palm makes its way down my body until his fingers dip inside my bathing suit. They run over my small bundle of nerves, and my body buckles from the contact.

  “Lay still.” His lips cascade through the valley of my breasts as he pulls up my shirt, perfectly working me into a frenzy. He licks along my stomach and pops the button on my jean shorts.

  A raspy whimper escapes when he pulls his hand from my bathing suit.

  “Don’t worry. I’m not done.” He jumps from the bed of the truck and moves me to the edge of the hatch. He wrestles with my shorts, pulling them and my bathing suit off.

  “What if someone drives by?” The idea alone causes a thrill to run through my body.

  “Keep an eye on the road. It’s dirt and pebbles. You’ll hear any car coming,” he explains, ducking his head between my legs. He pops back up. “Tap me on the shoulder as a warning.”

  “Whatever you say, boss.” My reaction seems to amuse him. He winks before ducking his head back down. A deep breath of air fills my lungs when his tongue strokes my clit. Making sure to keep an eye on the road, I rest back on my elbows. “Holy shit.” My back arches from the sensation, and I fall back. Fireworks build inside of me, burning deep inside. His tongue blocks out everything else in the world.

  “Dan.” When I think I hear something, a tuft of his hair is yanked to grab his attention. You’ve got to be kidding me. I was this close.

  “Yeah, baby?” he mutters. His words vibrate against my sensitive skin.

  “Car!” A shriek escapes me from fear of being caught with my pants literally down. He springs up, and I swivel back as he closes the hatch.

  “You broke down, sir?” an older man asks seconds later. At least I think he’s older. I won’t dare look over the side of the truck.

  “No, I’m all good here. Just had to stop for a second. Thought I heard someone scream my name,” he tells the man.

  I roll my eyes but have to cover my mouth to stifle the laugh begging to come out. The car pulls away, and Dan pops the hatch. He stands at the end, a definite bulge in his pants and just as big a smirk on his lips.

  “You’re an ass.” I chuckle. “I thought I heard someone scream my name? Really?”

  “Let’s see if I
can hear it again.” He crawls into the truck bed and nestles a hand between my thighs, spreading them apart.

  “Slow down, cowboy.” I push on his chest. “As much as I love the exhibitionist lifestyle, let’s go back to the house.”

  “Get dressed.” Dan throws my bathing suit bottoms and shorts at me. They smack against my chest. “Hurry up,” he urges, circling his finger in the air. His urgency is contagious.

  I laugh as I cover myself. My skin tingles and my knees wobble as I jump to get back in the cab of the truck. Dan’s foot slams on the gas pedal, and we race back. The entire drive, his leg shakes up and down. I place my hand on it to stop its assault on the floorboards. He offers a smile of the devil as he pulls in front of the house, running around to pull me into his arms and carry me inside.

  “Put me down,” I shout. My legs kick for an escape.

  “I’ll put you down.” He throws me onto the couch and covers me with his body. My wrists trapped under his light but forceful grip, he dips his head level with mine and connects us again.

  “This feels too good to stop.” Having Violet in my arms feels like heaven. She’s soft in all the right places, and her body moves perfectly alongside mine.

  “Then don’t,” Violet whispers in my ear.

  I don’t know how long we stay connected. Time is futile and obsolete. What matters is the way she leans into me and the brush of her hands all over my body I thought I’d never experience again. The kisses grow urgent as Violet tugs the shirt over my head, only allowing our lips to break for a split second.

  One by one, our clothes land on the floor until we are panting at the sight of each other.

  “You’re immaculate,” she whispers. Her cheeks redden, letting me know she didn’t mean to say it out loud.

  Her lips trace over my chest and stomach, stopping short of the promise land. In her hand, she holds me at her beck and call. I grow harder under her grasp, and I groan. Her tongue delicately wraps around the head of my dick, and my hands thread into her hair, holding her and controlling her pace. She swats them away when she feels the slightest of pressure, and I laugh, allowing them to fall to the couch cushions beneath me.