Too Close to Home

by Aoife Walsh

  ‘It’s fine,’ she said, shrugging. She did like Raymond, now he was older; she’d ignored him for most of the first year, just like she’d done with Selena, but now she was used to him. She read to him sometimes.

  The doorbell went again. Des looked up to heaven. For once Selena stayed where she was, so Minny scrambled up and went to answer it – it was Franklin.

  ‘Hi,’ she said.

  ‘Hi. Sorry. I forgot my keys,’ he mumbled. ‘I knew Judy was here.’

  ‘It’s OK. Come in.’

  ‘I don’t have to, if I can just get the keys.’

  ‘Come in. Do you want some tea or something?’

  He stood transfixed in the doorway; they’d all heard the bell and had gone silent, waiting to see who it was. Now they were all looking at him. ‘He was locked out,’ Minny explained.

  ‘Oh, Franklin, sorry, love.’ Granny started heaving herself to her feet.

  ‘I’ll make you some tea,’ Minny offered again, and left him, but he followed her into the kitchen.

  ‘God,’ he said. He looked unnerved.

  ‘I know. It’s a bit of a pile-up. That’s what our family apparently looks like these days.’ Then she wished she hadn’t said it, but she added bravely, putting a teabag into their very last mug, which was a Kit-Kat one Selena had got with an Easter egg, ‘How’s your mum?’

  ‘Oh. All right.’ He leaned against the cupboard and stared out of the window as she poured the boiling water. ‘I didn’t really go to see her. I mean, I just went in for two minutes to make sure she wasn’t dead or anything.’

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘I just said that to Judy because she’s a bit iffy about me going back to the estate. I think she thinks I’ll disappear back to my criminal past.’

  ‘Like Oliver Twist?’

  ‘Probably. But I had to see my mate.’

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘Just had to make sure she was OK.’

  ‘Oh, right,’ Minny said brightly. ‘Biscuit?’

  ‘Thanks.’

  ‘Girlfriend?’

  ‘What? Oh. No. Nothing like that. She just used to live next door to me, that’s all.’

  Minny couldn’t think of much to say. ‘You tuned the guitar really well.’

  ‘Really?’ He grinned at her over the biscuit. ‘Yeah, that’s a talent. Have you been playing it?’

  ‘Yeah, a bit.’

  ‘When are you going to come round so we can play the two together?’

  She cringed. ‘I’m really not very good. You should bring yours round here. Then I won’t be so embarrassed.’

  Her mother came hurrying in carrying all the chocolate boxes. ‘We need more biscuits; if Ash eats any more of this she’ll puke, and that would just be the icing on the cake this afternoon, wouldn’t it? Franklin, darling, have you got some tea? Well, both of you, come in then, please. If Aisling has to answer any more questions she’ll run away for ever and your father’s getting frustrated.’

  ‘And how’s school?’ he was asking as they all filed back in. His eyes combed Franklin down before he smiled at Minny. ‘How do you both like Raleigh?’ He’d left only about a month after they’d started there, Minny in Year 7 and Ash in Year 8.

  ‘I hate it.’ Aisling had stopped trying to avoid his questions, though she looked like she was on the verge of running out of the room.

  ‘Really?’

  ‘Oh, Ash,’ Nita said. Of course she knew school wasn’t heaven for Aisling, but they didn’t ask that kind of flat-out question very often in their house, because no one could deal with the answers. After all, you had to go to school.

  ‘What about friends?’

  ‘I don’t have any friends.’ He’d obviously forgotten what not to ask Ash.

  ‘You have me,’ Franklin said. Aisling smiled.

  Her father shifted in his chair. ‘Are you two in the same class?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘And you like some of the kids, don’t you?’ Nita encouraged her.

  ‘A couple.’

  ‘Well, that’s friends, in a way, isn’t it?’ God, Minny thought, he was really clunky. He used to know Ash so well. ‘What about the lessons? You were always so good – you must still like some of them?’

  ‘What about you, Minny?’ Harriet asked, which was a huge relief to everyone. ‘What do you like at school?’

  She shrugged.

  ‘English?’ Harriet hazarded. ‘Your dad says you’re a big reader.’

  ‘No, I don’t like it. I don’t like my teacher this year.’

  ‘Who have you got?’ Franklin asked. They were both standing just inside the door.

  ‘Mrs Lemon.’

  ‘Oh yeah. Me too. She’s rubbish.’

  ‘I know.’

  ‘My last school was rough, but the teachers were better. I don’t even think she can read.’

  Minny laughed. Ash, who also had Mrs Lemon for English, looked confused.

  ‘What I’m dying to know,’ Des said loudly. ‘Well, one of the things, is how brilliant you all are these days. How you do at school.’

  ‘They’re all extremely bright,’ Nita said.

  ‘I thought so.’

  ‘Now you can attend their parents’ evenings,’ Babi said from the back of the room.

  It was bearable. It was awful, and not something anyone should ever have to go through, but it wasn’t killing anyone; even Ash had managed to stay in the room, and it was civilised. Minny was just hoping no one would mention visiting Dad’s flat, as if that was something they were going to be doing now. Babi, looking long-suffering, had taken the baby up to have his nappy changed, which allowed Nita to muster up the courage to talk to Harriet about her pregnancy. Minny heard her say the baby was due in September, which made everyone’s heads shoot up because it was sooner than any of them had been expecting.

  ‘Gosh,’ Nita said, a bit lamely. ‘You’re tiny, considering.’

  ‘Well, it seems to have spread all across me rather than just being a bump,’ Harriet said. ‘But apparently it’s normal not to show till late the first time. Everyone I know has been threatening me, saying the second one makes you pop out straightaway.’

  ‘You should try the fourth,’ Nita said sadly.

  ‘Anyway, I actually can’t wait. I’m on tenterhooks.’

  ‘And we’ve got some more news!’ Des announced, rubbing his hands.’

  ‘Oh God,’ Minny said, ‘it’s not twins, is it?’

  They all laughed, and she got embarrassed, but he said, ‘No, but it is about our family –’ he circled his arm energetically to show he meant him and Harriet – ‘the new branch, if it’s not too weird to call it that …’

  ‘It is quite weird,’ Aisling said.

  Their granny rolled her eyes.

  ‘But Harriet and I are getting married.’

  There was a silence.

  ‘Oh!’ Nita said.

  Selena squealed, in a non-verbal way.

  ‘Mother of God,’ said Granny.

  ‘Oh, thanks, Ma.’

  ‘Well, now, you’re going to have to give me some time to get used to the idea.’

  ‘Of course,’ Harriet put in hastily.

  Des waited a moment. ‘And we would love it if you guys would be part of it. More specifically, we hope you three will be bridesmaids.’

  This time it was Nita who got the giggles, and Minny who felt like pinching her. Things had been so polite she felt she couldn’t just say, ‘I don’t want to be a bridesmaid.’

  ‘I don’t want to be a bridesmaid,’ Aisling said. Thank God for that.

  ‘Me neither.’

  ‘Now, don’t say that straight off.’

  ‘I’m not going to put you in puffy pink dresses,’ Harriet said. ‘Unless you want me to.’ She smiled at Selena, who looked troubled as usual.

  ‘That’s not really the point, Harriet.’ Nita had got rid of her giggles quicker than Minny had. ‘I’m sorry, but I don’t think you can really put the girls in this position qui
te yet, Des.’

  ‘Well, maybe I shouldn’t have brought it up then. The wedding’s not till next year anyway, so there’s plenty of time to think about it.’

  ‘I don’t want to,’ Aisling said.

  Her mother glanced at her. ‘I think I’m going to say right now that Ash doesn’t have to.’

  ‘Well, of course she doesn’t have to—’

  Nita cut him off. ‘You might have forgotten, Des, that Aisling can feel very stressed out and pressured by things she thinks she’s going to have to do, even if they’re a long way ahead. And I can’t see her changing her mind on this one. It’s not the kind of thing she’s going to like.’

  ‘How do you know?’

  ‘Excuse me?’

  ‘Well, she’s never been in this situation before, has she? It might be good for you, Ash.’

  ‘How exactly might it be good for her?’

  ‘Dessie,’ Harriet murmured, ‘we don’t need to push this now.’

  ‘And this is her father’s wedding we’re talking about; it’s being a bridesmaid; it’s the kind of thing most little girls dream about.’

  ‘What, bridesmaiding when their father marries a woman who’s not their mother?’ Minny asked. ‘That’s some weird fantasy for all little girls to have, Dad.’

  ‘I’m not a little girl,’ Aisling said.

  ‘That’s right, Des, she’s nearly sixteen. It’s been quite a time since she was a little girl, but that’s the time you missed. You can’t come in here and suggest that your daughters owe you anything, or that one of them is strange or abnormal for not wanting to wear a ludicrous dress in front of a lot of people and be part of your wedding to a woman – excuse me, Harriet – she hardly knows.’

  ‘Two,’ Minny said. ‘Two daughters. I’m not doing it either.’

  ‘Now hang on a moment.’ Her father was sitting in his annoyed-bear position. ‘You can back off, Nita. If the girls truly don’t want to once they’ve had a chance to think about it, then that’s up to them. I’m just saying, this would be a chance to do something nice, not just for me, or for their new brother or sister, but for themselves. Get all done up, wear a pretty dress – it looks to me as if they might not often get the chance just to do that—’

  ‘What?’ Nita said loudly.

  ‘Well, they’re three gorgeous girls, Nita, growing up, and I just wonder, have your own personal opinions, and your feminist spirit – which you know I’ve always admired—’

  ‘Oh, get to the point, Des.’

  ‘If you let them wear what they might like to wear, and make the most of being beautiful girls.’

  There was a pause. Most people in the room were rigid with embarrassment. ‘What the hell are you talking about, Dad?’ Minny asked.

  ‘Do you get to buy many new clothes, Minny, that’s what I’m asking.’

  ‘Well, we don’t have that much money.’ She was surprised to find herself shouting.

  ‘Now, I think everyone should just calm down,’ Judy said.

  Des ignored her. ‘Mmm. And, Nita, how has the baby affected your finances, if you don’t mind my asking?’

  ‘I mind you asking.’ That was Gil, of all people, suddenly standing up.

  But Minny was already yelling over him, before she knew she was going to. ‘Probably not as much as your new FAMILY.’

  She was aware of Aisling and Sel sitting together on the sofa looking scared. And Franklin, though he was so close she could only see him out of the corner of her eye.

  ‘It’s all right, Minny,’ Nita said. ‘Des, you have to stop crossing lines like that. If you’ve got questions to ask me that are rude and intrusive, please don’t do it in front of the girls.’

  ‘Don’t do it at all,’ Gil said. He was tall, probably taller than their father.

  Des stood up too. Only a little shorter actually. ‘If it’s not my business, Gil, it’s certainly not yours.’

  ‘I don’t want to see anyone bullying Anita.’

  ‘That’s all right, Gil,’ Nita said. ‘I can stand up for myself.’

  Everyone just wanted to hide by now, but thankfully Des and Harriet left quite quickly. Babi came downstairs with the baby and Gil swept her off, probably so he could give her the lowdown on what had happened. Judy and Franklin stayed to finish their tea, which was good because it kept Selena distracted and not actually crying. Nita wasn’t in a frame of mind to comfort her, nor to talk to guests; she stomped all over the house and curses came whistling out from odd places every few minutes. Aisling had gone into her room. Minny read some books to Raymond and then left him piling up Jenga blocks with Franklin for a minute and went upstairs. Nita was pretending to tidy her room.

  ‘He was always like that,’ Minny said.

  ‘Arrogant, egotistical, control-freaking insensitive arsehole.’

  ‘Yeah, like that.’

  ‘I shouldn’t have lost my temper. Not in front of you three anyway. I shouldn’t have let him lose his temper; he’ll be sorry by now. But honestly …’

  ‘Do you know she’s a Liverpool fan?’

  ‘What?’

  ‘Harriet, she’s a Liverpool fan.’ Her mother had her mouth open, like a toddler when you distract it from screaming with something shiny. Then she started giggling, and they both giggled for a bit until Selena heard them and came upstairs with brimming eyes to ask just what was so funny.

  SIX

  They didn’t talk about it much after that, except when Nita calmed down she and Babi did have a conversation that began at Gil. ‘I’m not saying anything against him, Mama, I was honestly touched that he was defending me, but it was unnecessary.’

  ‘You say that, Nita, but you always end up bowing down to Des and what you think he needs.’

  ‘Not any more.’

  ‘Oh, please. It didn’t take long for him to be sitting in my front room with his … girl, his unborn child and his mother, did it?’

  ‘I know it’s your front room, Mama …’

  ‘That’s not the point.’

  ‘But I really didn’t need anyone to stand up for me. I already had to calm down Minny. Also, it ratcheted up the tension even more, which was not what I wanted. I want things to be easier for the girls.’

  ‘You need to remind him of that.’

  ‘I did, and I will.’

  ‘It wasn’t Gil’s business,’ Minny said, to no one in particular, gathering up dishes to lay the table.

  ‘Look, Mama, the bottom line is that Des is the children’s father.’

  ‘Yeah,’ Selena said, glaring at Babi. ‘He is.’

  ‘He is,’ Aisling confirmed.

  It got hot and sunny that week. On Tuesday Franklin came back from school with Minny and Aisling and they sat outside in the garden, taking it in turns to play the guitar and sing, while Raymond splashed in the paddling pool. Of course they’d had to laugh about the Sunday tea before anything else. Franklin was fairly careful not to mock their father too much, so they spent more time on Gil. ‘He was pretty tough,’ Minny said.

  ‘Yeah, it was sexy,’ Franklin agreed.

  ‘Almost felt sorry for my dad there.’

  Selena came out in her swimming costume and sat beside them for a while. She wanted to sing ‘Midnight Special’, and Franklin obligingly strummed along for a bit, but then she had more and more ideas, until Minny had to tell her to go away.

  Penny was around more than usual all week because Jorge had some deadline for a module in geography. He finished on Friday and Penny had to go off to meet him. ‘Do you want to go to the park later?’ she asked Minny at lunchtime.

  ‘Sure, maybe.’

  ‘Good. Well, Jorge and I might be there too. See you if we are.’

  Left alone, Minny sighed. Actually she was glad Penny wasn’t going home with her, because she had to pick up Selena from school again and had already told Ash she could walk with her. She’d been sensitive all week about Penny watching her watch out for Aisling. Besides, she wasn’t feeling very sociable by the t
ime school finished because of PE being last thing. Back to tennis today; she only hit the ball once during the whole lesson, and sent it out.

  As it happened, Franklin joined them as they were leaving school. ‘We’ve got to get Selena from her after-school club,’ Minny explained.

  ‘I don’t mind.’

  ‘OK, but we’d better hurry up. If we’re a minute later than half three they charge Mum more. I wish we were rich. Then we could just leave her there all night. In fact we’d never have to see her.’

  ‘Poor Selena,’ he said. ‘We could go to the park after we’ve picked her up.’

  ‘OK. If we go home now Gil’ll just be there, and we’re not allowed to make him feel uncomfortable so let’s just stay out.’

  ‘What about Pointless?’ Ash asked from a few metres behind.

  ‘Oh, watch it on the internet later. Or you can go back home if you like.’

  ‘No, I don’t want to.’

  They were a few minutes late. Sel was standing in the corridor outside her classroom waiting, tears leaking down her cheeks. ‘What’s wrong with you?’ Minny asked.

  ‘Nothing.’ She was clutching her lunch box and water bottle and a sweaty handful of the stupid little animal toys she insisted on taking to school every day. ‘I couldn’t find my bag.’

  ‘Did you look properly?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Well, you’ll find it on Monday.’

  ‘But I can’t carry all this stuff.’

  ‘Here, gimme that. Ash, you take the lunch box.’ But she couldn’t get it into her bag.

  ‘I’ll take it,’ Franklin offered.

  ‘No,’ Selena snapped. ‘Then I’ll forget it and I won’t have it next week.’

  ‘Give it here.’ Minny emptied all the litter in it into the big bin which was supposed to be for paper. Used lunch boxes smelled terrible. ‘Put your stupid toys in it and Franklin can put it in his bag for now, unless you want to carry it yourself.’ Selena wiped her face and looked sulky.

  The park was nice when they got there. Hot and green but with a breeze blowing up the paths off the river. They wandered down one, taking the longer, cooler way to the playground.

  A man was fishing off the towpath, from one of those green folding chairs. He looked almost asleep. The river was fat and flat and oily. The water nearly always looked filthy, but it was still pretty at the park because there were so many trees, and green space on the other side, and ducks and swans swimming all around the moored boats. Minny always wondered who those boats belonged to. She’d lived around there all her life but never known anyone who owned a boat.