by Carol Rose
“Sounds good,” Kelsey agreed, new tears prickling at her eyes.
She shut the door behind him moments later and leaned back on the wood panel with a sense of consolation. Her life might have gone to hell and her marriage was now in shambles, but at least Doug appeared to be over his infatuation.
Now if only he could convince her sister of the fact.
***
As Doug stood in the shadowed darkness, Amy walked out of the restaurant, her friend at her side. The foot traffic on the sidewalk was consistent, but he could see her clearly from where he waited.
The two weeks away from her seemed like an eon and he couldn’t keep from staring at her hungrily, his body tense as she came through the doorway.
Her shiny dark hair cascaded over her shoulders, curling in a casual abandon that pierced him. All those wonderful nights, he’d had her head on the pillow next to his.
She had to listen to him. He’d make her listen.
Standing beside Amy, Janelle, his information source, adjusted the strap of her purse on her shoulder. As they stood in the exit, the other woman cast him a surreptitious glance.
“I’m so glad you could join me tonight,” he heard Amy say, her smile warm despite the tiredness around her eyes. Had she been sleeping badly, he wondered. Missing him at all?
“It was a terrific meal,” Janelle agreed, turning to head off down the street with a final look in his direction. “Well, I gotta go. I’ll see you at work, Amy.”
Dodging a woman and a stroller, he stepped forward out of the shadows and into the light cast by the street lamp. Doug said, “Amy!”
She turned then, her eyes widening as she saw him standing next to her—and then hardening. Without a word, she turned and walked away toward the street corner, the line of her body stiff with anger.
Moving between on-coming pedestrians, Doug followed her, pleading, “Will you give me a chance to explain? At least, listen a minute?”
“No,” she said, continuing to walk briskly along the sidewalk, threading her way between elderly women with shopping backs and businessmen toting their briefcases.
“Amy, I’m an idiot and a fool, but I love you,” he said, not caring if he was overheard. If she wouldn’t stop, he’d make his plea this way.
But a sound of disgust in her throat was his only response.
“Amy! Please listen to me!” He walked next to her, shifting around the toddler who’d strayed from his father.
Amy came to the corner and joined the crowd standing there, her face cold as she waited for the light to change. “Get lost. I’ve already wasted too much time on you. Go talk to Kelsey.”
Doug grimaced, following her out into the crosswalk when the group of people moved. “I know I’ve been a fool. I don’t deserve you.”
“No, you don’t,” she agreed immediately. “Stop following me!”
“But I love you,” he said, matching his steps to her fast walk. “I’ve realized my mistakes.”
“Whatever. I don’t care.” She quickened her step as they came to a construction zone with scaffolding over the sidewalk. The poles of the overhead maze created lanes for foot traffic with only the occasional cross-through. Moving to one side as pedestrians streamed from the opposite direction, Amy kept walking.
“Will you stop and listen to me?” he asked when he’d fought his way through the shifting pack of people.
“No.” She didn’t pause. “I’ve listened to your lies too many times and if you don’t leave me alone and stop following me, I’ll get a restraining order.”
“Amy!” he said sharply as they stepped out from under the scaffolding, coming to another street corner.
But she didn’t turn, forging ahead as the light changed.
“Amy,” Doug called out loudly, following her to the opposite curb. “Your sister asked me to marry her.”
Ten feet ahead of him, in the stream of pedestrians, Amy stopped. She turned and looked at him then—the first time she’d looked him in the face since he’d surprised her outside the restaurant. Looking into her beautiful eyes, he saw raw pain and cursed himself for causing it, while rejoicing that she still cared.
“I hope you’ll both be very happy,” she told him and then turned as if to disappear into the flow of humanity streaming around them.
“I turned her down, Amy,” he said, his voice raised to reach her. “I turned Kelsey down.”
He saw her stopped on the pavement ahead of him, still turned away. Hurrying forward, Doug stepped around in front of her, saying urgently, “I turned her down because I realized I never loved her as more than a sister.”
Puzzlement and disbelief filled Amy’s face.
Doug took a step closer, reaching out for her hand. “I’ve never loved her.”
She didn’t resist him, didn’t pull her hand out of his, but only searched his face with eyes now fearful and confused.
“I’ve never loved anyone but you,” Doug said fervently, drawing her closer by the expedient of tugging on her hand. “I love you.”
Shocked silence was his answer, her gaze searching his, a tremulous smile beginning to quiver on her mouth.
In a rush of love and relief, he fought back the choked feeling in his throat and dropped to one knee on the pavement in front of her.
“Amy, I love you. Will you marry me?”
“Doug!” she said, a stunned note in her voice, her gaze bouncing from his face to the flood of people walking by them, back to his face.
“Will you?” he asked again, unconcerned about the amused looks they were drawing.
“I don’t understand,” she gasped, half tearfully.
“It’s a simple question,” he replied, his laughter soft and full of love.
Amy shook her head as if to clear it. “But Kelsey isn’t living with Jared now. There’s no reason to think they’ll stay married—“
“I know and I’m sorry for them,” he said without hesitation. “But as far as I’m concerned, it doesn’t matter. I’m not in love with Kelsey. I love you.”
“My God,” she breathed, her face growing pink under the glare of the streetlight. “My God.”
“This is a proposal, you know,” Doug said humorously, gesturing to his kneeling position. “I don’t have a ring in my hand, but you still have to answer.”
“Omigod,” she said slowly. “Omigod.”
Doug got up, took her into his arms and lowered his mouth to hers, so soft and warm. A quiver ran through her and the feel of her response sent hunger and need and relief raging in him.
Completely disregarding the curious stares and snickers, he held her tight in his arms and kissed her for all he was worth. His woman. His own, perfect woman.
At last he had his head screwed on right. With Amy in his arms, all the craziness of the past two weeks evaporated and his world righted itself. She was what he needed, the woman he needed for a lifetime.
His infatuation with Kelsey had only been a projection of his own self-image. But he didn’t need it anymore.
Lifting his head, he asked in a husky voice, “So will you marry me?”
“Yes.” Amy started to cry, her smile more beautiful than he’d ever seen.
“Right away?” he asked, his arms tightening around her.
“Yes.” She nodded and cried more.
“I’ve wasted so much time,” Doug said, bending to kiss her again.
***
“No, Brinkman,” Jared said sharply, “I do not want you to fire my wife.”
“I had no idea you two were—“ the head of the advertising agency broke off, starting again. “Marriage can be difficult. Ask any of my three ex-wives. I just didn’t know that you and Kelsey were having trouble.”
The older man looked harassed. “We don’t want you to feel uncomfortable here.”
“My relationship with my wife,” Jared said, emphasizing the last word, “is not your concern and in no way effects my doing business here.”
Brinkman cast him a doubtful gla
nce, the worried furrow between his brows not lessening. “Kelsey has always been an excellent art director, but your account here—“
“Is not affected,” Jared repeated, feeling the tension coursing through him just knowing Kelsey sat only a few feet away from him. God, how he missed her.
“Well, if you’re sure,” Brinkman murmured, glancing anxiously through the open doorway to the conference room where the Meriton team waited. Kelsey sat to the side of the table, the smooth bell of her dark hair hiding most of her face.
Just seeing her here like this brought hunger clamoring inside him—hunger for her smile, her touch, the silver note of her laughter.
“Don’t fire her,” Jared repeated. “Our relationship is our own concern.”
“I just thought it might be uncomfortable,” the other man said, obviously uncomfortable himself.
“Let’s go in.” Jared turned, entering the conference room. All eyes turned toward him, except hers. Making his way to the seat reserved for him, he was deeply conscious of Kelsey keeping her gaze averted, the beautiful curve of her mouth in a tense line.
Brinkman started the meeting. “Well, boys and girls, what have we come up with for the Meriton’s new campaign….”
Not anxious to display his marital difficulties for Kelsey’s entire office to observe, Jared sat casually in his chair, careful to respond when addressed. His mind, however, couldn’t care less about the advertising for one of his damned hotels.
How had he gone wrong, he wondered, fiercely aware of her sitting just across the smooth, polished surface of the conference table. Somehow, he’d failed miserable. Failed her, failed himself.
For a time, he’d believe he was breaking through her barriers, building trust with her. But that illusion had been shattered when he’d come home to her note. He hadn’t managed to break through crap with her, obviously. She’d come to a vulnerable point and run like a coward. Run like a woman who feared for her life.
“…this graph shows the sector we’re reaching….”
Forcing himself to keep his hands still, Jared resisted the urge to drum his fingers on his knee. This damned charade was killing him. All he wanted to do was leap across the table, take her by the shoulders and shake her till she admitted she loved him.
Of all the people in the world, Kelsey had the biggest, bravest heart. Why didn’t she trust herself, trust her heart?
Not for a moment did he believe her supposed pregnancy had driven her from him. It was something else, something that eluded him. If he could discern the problem, he could fix it. But his lonely, sleepless nights, spent prowling the apartment while going over every step of his failed campaign in his head, yielded no answers.
He’d have been more angry with her if he thought she even knew the question to be answered. In truth, his beautiful wife seemed even more miserable than he felt.
Throughout the meeting, she’d been sitting silent, her tense, somber gaze on the blank notepad in her hands or fixed glassily on Brinkman. Since Brinkman wasn’t a riveting kind of guy, Jared concluded she must think the man at the head of the table was the safest place to train her gaze.
Following her example, Jared brooded on Brinkman’s tie and wondered again what his next step should be. Giving up on her had never occurred to him. He was just so miserable he couldn’t concentrate enough to find the right angle, the optimal way to overcome Kelsey’s issues.
Hell, he didn’t even know why she thought she’d had to leave. That bullshit about Doug and Amy was a screen.
His stare still fixed on Brinkman’s silly cartoon tie, Jared felt her gaze touch him like the warm stroke of her hand. He sat there a moment, assessing the sensation, knowing she’d lifted her gaze to him. From the corner of his eye, he saw the strained expression on her face.
Deliberately, Jared looked her full in the face, catching her startled glance and holding it for a long moment. In that one look, he poured everything—his understanding of her anxieties, his determination to win her over.
As much as a man could promise with a look, he promised. This wasn’t over. It couldn’t be over.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Kelsey unlocked her office door and the scent of roses surrounded her. Vases of the flowers were everywhere—on her desk, on the file cabinets, on the floor. Every corner of the room was filled with roses, dozens and dozens of them in every color until the small space looked like a floral stall at an open-air market.
The smell of foliage and refrigerated petals was over-powering.
Her heart thudding, Kelsey stepped into the room, carefully shutting the door behind her. This would draw comments from her co-workers and she just didn’t want to hear them yet.
As romantic gestures went, a room full of flowers tended to make a woman’s knees go weak.
Crossing the room, she lifted the single rose lying in the seat of her desk chair. A folded piece of paper lie beneath the solitary bloom. She lifted the blood-red thing to her face, the petals soft against her cheeks. Closing her eyes as tears welled, she held it cradled there.
If only. If only it were true. If she could only believe in all the implications.
The folded sheet of paper crackled in her hand as she opened it, wiping the back of a hand across her eyes.
This is crazy, he’d written. I miss you. Can’t you give our arrangement another chance? We agreed to a year. Come home.
Disappointment threatened to choke her. It smelled of roses and terror.
He said nothing of love, nothing more than “come back.” She had an office full of man’s favorite way to get around a woman. More manipulation. And typically, he’d done it big.
Dropping the flower into the trash, Kelsey sank into her chair. He wanted her to come back, wanted her in his bed, his life…for the rest of the year he had coming.
Living with him and knowing the end would come would be like going willingly into the mouth of hell. She couldn’t.
***
“Doug proposed?” Kelsey gasped, surprise pushing back the gray misery surrounding her. “Right there in the street?”
“Yes,” her sister sighed, her eyes misting over at the memory. “I’d given up on him. Truly, I’d even accepted a date with that guy who works two floors down.”
“The blonde guy who’s always riding the elevators,” Kelsey asked, momentarily distracted from her sister’s astounding news.
“Yes.” Amy nodded and giggled. “Then Doug showed up outside of Pietro’s and kept trying to talk to me.”
“He proposed.” Kelsey felt stunned at the wonderful turn of events. In the face of her own devastating emotional turmoil, at least her sister’s life had taken a turn for the better. “Wow. So, I guess Doug’s not the idiot we’d decided he was?”
“I don’t know,” Amy responded happily, “but regardless, he’s my idiot now.”
“And you’re not mad at me anymore?” Kelsey ventured hopefully. Having her sister so withdrawn and angry had made the past few days even more horrible. Her heart was mangled inside and she couldn’t even turn to Amy.
“No. I never was really mad at you. I was just furious with everything and you got tangled up in it.” Her sister smiled at her. “Doug told me you asked him to marry you—“
“What?” Kelsey gasped. “I did not!”
“Well, later he admitted that you’d just said you should have married him instead of falling in love with Jared,” Amy conceded. “But that was enough. That was what did the trick.”
“You’re kidding.” Confused, Kelsey stared at her sister.
“Nope. It was like, suddenly the thing he thought he’d always wanted was in sight and he realized he didn’t really want you,” Amy concluded beatifically. “No offense.”
“None taken,” Kelsey responded immediately. “That’s what did the trick? Me making a stupid, miserable comment about marrying him? I was talking about the mistake I made in marrying Jared.”
“Well,” Amy said, blowing on her ever present cup of coffee, “th
at’s what did the trick. Combined, of course, with his misery at not seeing me.”
“Of course.” Kelsey smiled at her sister, her own misery lessening some. “So you’re getting married next week? That’s incredibly fast. You’re sure you don’t want the big church ceremony thing?”
“Yes. We want to get married as quickly as possible. Doug says he’s wasted too much time already,” Amy told her smugly.
“Speaking as the woman who was the focus of his wasted time,” Kelsey said dryly, “I agree.”
“Kels,” Amy said after a moment. “I’m thinking of inviting Dad to the wedding.”
“Dad?” Kelsey looked at her blankly. “Our father, you mean?”
“Yes,” Amy laughed. “Our father.”
Kelsey hesitated, remembering the stranger she’d gone to the investment seminar to see. She still couldn’t reach out to him herself, couldn’t put aside the anger that had grown in her since seeing him. “Of course, it’s up to you, but he’s never chosen to be a part of our lives.”
“I know,” Amy said wryly. “I’m not doing something so silly as asking him to walk me down the aisle. I’ll do that like you did—walk alone. I don’t know. I’m just considering inviting him. But I kind of feel like it’s time to heal the breach.”
“That’s not something you can do alone if he’s not willing,” Kelsey warned her, not sure how she felt about her sister’s overture toward the man who abandoned them both.
“No. But maybe he’s ready to make amends and just doesn’t know how to find us,” Amy paused. “Maybe he made a mistake a long time ago and doesn’t know how to mend it.”
“That would certainly be consistent with the way the rest of us in this family work,” Kelsey said heavily, her own errors in judgment returning to mind. She’d known Jared would be dangerous to her heart, but she’d married him anyway. The end result—Amy’s happiness—was wonderful, but in the meantime, Kelsey knew she’d never be the same woman. She wondered if she’d ever find a way to stop missing Jared. Ever wake up and not long for his arms around her.
The scent of roses still lingered in the room despite her ruthlessly removing every bouquet, every last fluttering rose petal.