A Lot Like Adiós

by Alexis Daria

  It didn’t matter, because asking for advice was out of the question. Too much time had passed, and Gabe had worked too hard to get his father’s voice out of his head. He had to sort this out on his own. He’d gotten into this mess, and he was the only one who could clean it up.

  He didn’t have time to dig into the past with them like he suspected they wanted, but the least he could do was say goodbye in person.

  And Michelle. What was he supposed to say? Sorry for dragging you into this, but I’m either selling the gym or partnering with the investor, and even though I think your idea is perfect, he isn’t going to go for it. Fuck, what a mess. And it told him all he needed to know about how much his own business had already gotten away from him.

  The whole thing was fucking embarrassing. After all they’d gone through on this trip for the sake of the gym, he had to admit that it was a failure. He’d make sure Michelle got paid for the work she’d done, and after that . . . he didn’t know what they were going to do. He had nothing to offer but old memories and a big dick. She was smart and funny and beautiful, and she deserved more.

  For now, he had to get out of here. This wasn’t his life anymore. His life was back in Los Angeles, and he’d already been gone too long.

  Before he could change his mind, Gabe pulled up the airline app. There was a flight in a few hours. He bought a ticket and started packing.

  Fourteen years ago

  Windows Messenger Chat Transcript

  Celestial Destiny: Episode 11 Planning Session

  Gabe:

  I think I wrote us into a corner.

  Michelle:

  Don’t worry, we’ll figure out how to free them from the dungeon.

  Gabe:

  In a way that isn’t totally contrived?

  Michelle:

  Zack has his memory back, so he knows what his powers are.

  Gabe:

  But he hasn’t used them in years.

  Michelle:

  Maybe he tries to use them to get out but fails.

  Gabe:

  That’s gonna kill him.

  Michelle:

  Not literally!

  Gabe:

  No, but he’s going to hate failing.

  Michelle:

  So what? They’re not at the end yet. He can’t have too much growth by this point. Let him mope for a while.

  Gabe:

  Fine, but you’re writing the moping scenes.

  Michelle:

  But you’re so good at moping!

  Gabe:

  Chapter 22

  Michelle was in the basement at her father’s desk, working on a new vector design for the Agility logo, when Gabe came downstairs.

  She turned to him with a smile, which faltered when she saw the downcast look on his face.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked, getting to her feet and going to him. “Did your parents—”

  “I’m leaving.”

  “Oh.” This was her chance to drop hints about continuing to explore what was growing between them. “Will you be coming back at some point to—”

  “No. We’re probably selling the gym.”

  The words hit her like a punch. They were the absolute last thing she thought he’d say.

  “What? I thought you were opening another location.”

  Gabe’s voice was clipped and formal. “The situation has changed and the best option now is to sell. I appreciate all the work you’ve put into this, but—”

  “Gabe, what happened? Yesterday I gave you the presentation and today you’re saying it’s all over.” Michelle didn’t like this bleak, guarded version of Gabe, or the feeling that the gym was the only thing keeping him in her life. Because without it . . . where did that leave them? “Why is this the best option?”

  His tone was full of bitterness. “Fabian’s out and Powell’s ready to buy immediately. The smart choice is to throw away everything I’ve worked for.”

  “But you’re selling it,” she said, trying to understand. “You’re not throwing it away.”

  His lips compressed and he shook his head. “Feels the same.”

  “Why don’t you sit down? We’ll brainstorm. You don’t have to make this decision alone.”

  “I do,” he said stubbornly. “It’s all on me.”

  “Gabe—”

  “Anyway, I came down to tell you I’m leaving.” He wouldn’t meet her gaze.

  Her breath caught. “When?”

  “Now.”

  A chasm opened inside her, threatening to suck her in. This was happening sooner, and faster, than she’d expected. But she gathered her mettle and spoke the question in her heart. “Can’t you stay a little longer?”

  “Michelle, my business is falling apart.”

  “Maybe if we talked about it—”

  “What is there to talk about?” Gabe ran his hands through his hair. “You knew I was going to leave. And now it’s happening. I would’ve been gone already if I hadn’t run into my dad.”

  Michelle had no idea how they’d gotten from planning the expansion to a corporate takeover, but that wasn’t the point here. Gabe was clearly conflicted about the decision, and if she could only get him to calm down and discuss it with her, she was sure they could work it out.

  And maybe, they’d be able to work something out between the two of them too.

  Thirteen years earlier, Gabe had told her he was leaving.

  Damn it, she wouldn’t make the same mistake she had last time.

  “Gabe. Please stay.”

  There. She’d said it. In no uncertain terms. She was putting her heart on the line, making herself vulnerable. It was scary as hell, but worth it.

  He was worth it.

  “Mich, I can’t.” Anguish roughened his voice, and his eyes pleaded with her to understand. “I have to go back and deal with this.”

  Michelle waited, but he left it at that. Nothing about how he’d come back after it was taken care of, or how he’d call her once he was in a better frame of mind. No mention of the future at all.

  Because she, clearly, wasn’t worth it.

  It was on the tip of her tongue to say the other piece, the thing that had been brewing inside her for a few days.

  I’m falling in love with you.

  But she wouldn’t use that on him. Not like this. So she locked it away inside what was left of her heart.

  “All right.” Her voice was brittle, and she felt like she was about to break into a thousand pieces.

  He gave her a pained look. “I have to do this, Michelle.”

  “What about us, Gabe?”

  “I don’t know what to tell you. My life is in LA. You knew that.”

  “So you’re just going to pretend like nothing happened?”

  “Michelle, whatever we’ve been doing here, playing house, isn’t real life. My real life is falling apart and I have to go fix it.”

  It didn’t matter that she’d opened up to him more than she ever had with anyone else. It didn’t matter that they were good together. It didn’t matter that she loved him.

  She’d loved him before—granted, not like this, but she had—and he’d still left. And according to him, he’d wanted her back then and left anyway. Cut her out because of his feelings for her.

  Was it any surprise he was doing the same thing now?

  As much as Michelle wanted to wish otherwise, she knew that once Gabe left, she wouldn’t hear from him again. This was it. She could either argue with him or scream at him like she had before, or she could say goodbye and accept the truth.

  Let it be real.

  But it wasn’t real. He’d just said so.

  He was leaving, and they were over.

  “Good luck,” she said. Because what else was there to say? She’d known this was coming. From the beginning, he’d been clear that he was going back. It was her own stupid heart that had hoped he might change his mind. Or that even if he left, he’d do it sweetly, with assurances that he’d return.

  Exce
pt it wasn’t meant to be. He was leaving her. Again.

  It was as Michelle had always suspected. Love was for other people. And she was meant to be alone.

  If even Gabe didn’t think she was worth sticking around for, who would?

  He turned and headed for the stairs. Halfway there, he stopped. His hands clenched and unclenched. Then he spun around and stomped back to her. The look on his face was fierce and hungry, and she was already moving toward him when he caught her around the waist and pulled her in for a kiss.

  Michelle slung an arm around his shoulders and went up on tiptoe, pressing their bodies together, soaking in the feel of him. Gabe held her close, and she poured everything she felt for him into the kiss. It was pure heat, the intensity drawing whimpers and moans from their throats as their tongues tangled and their teeth nipped. It was a wild, unspoken war of all the things they had and hadn’t said.

  It was goodbye.

  As she had in this very basement all those years ago, Michelle reached for the waistband of his pants, yanking at the elastic in desperate movements. Before she could free his cock, he gripped the back of her thighs and lifted her, carrying her to the desk. He deposited her on the surface and shoved her laptop and notebooks aside. She didn’t even care that the pencil case fell to the floor, her collection of colored pens spilling out across the beige carpet. Urgency was the only factor here.

  Their mouths parted long enough for Michelle to lean back on her arms, lifting her hips so Gabe could yank her shorts and panties down her legs. He shoved his own pants and briefs to mid-thigh as she hurried to find a condom in her zip-around Wonder Woman wallet. She ripped open the wrapper and gripped the base of his dick, holding him still as she rolled the condom down his hard length. He hissed in pleasure, his eyes rolling back as she sheathed him, but he didn’t say a word and neither did she.

  There was nothing left to say. There was only this.

  Gabe hooked his arms under her knees, angling her hips so they aligned with his cock. His mouth found hers again in a searing kiss, and she reached down to guide him into her. She was wet, but not enough, and it was her turn to hiss as he stretched her. She scooted forward as much as she was able, urging him on, and he pumped his hips to work his way in.

  From there, he set the pace for a hard, fast fuck.

  Face-to-face, with barely a breath between them, Michelle could barely hold a thought in her head. Everything about him overwhelmed her senses, from his size, to his heat, to the sound of his harsh breaths and his clean, soapy scent. She took everything he gave and committed it all to memory. She kissed him so hard her lips felt bruised, but she didn’t care. She needed as much of him as she could get before he was gone.

  His eyes were closed, like hers had been the first time they’d had sex, and she couldn’t blame him. It gave her the opportunity to study his face as he fucked her, to memorize the crease between his dark brows, the way his jaw tightened and his lips parted to reveal a flash of clenched white teeth.

  But eventually the sensations became too much for her, and her own eyes drifted shut. Michelle stopped thinking and just let herself feel. From this angle, his cock was rubbing both her clit and her interior walls in the most delicious way. She moaned as he moved inside her, and the feelings intensified. She tightened her thighs around him as her body wound with tension.

  Holy fuck, she’d never felt this close to a vaginal orgasm before. Her toes curled against his ass and she threw her head back, giving herself over to him. He took her cue and ran kisses up and down her neck, swirling his tongue against the sensitive skin as he picked up the pace, grinding deeper and harder.

  The climax hit her fast, sudden and devastating. She cried out, digging her nails into his shoulders as she shook and shattered. A second later, he groaned and pressed his forehead to hers, his body heaving as he came.

  And then it was over.

  Tingles still spiraled through her, but he’d stopped moving. Her heart pounded like it was going to jump right out of her chest and follow him to California.

  Gabe finally opened his eyes and met her gaze. His expression was bleak, but he raised a hand and brushed aside the hair that had fallen into her face during his vigorous attentions. Then he reached for the box of tissues—and froze. Michelle glanced over to see what he was staring at. When Gabe had pushed everything aside, a yellow legal pad had shifted out from beneath the pile of notebooks.

  And on it, her Pros and Cons list.

  With a shuddering sigh, Gabe slipped out of her and backed away, grabbing a handful of tissues from the box on the desk. He wrapped them around himself, then raised his pants before walking into the bathroom and shutting the door behind him. A moment later, she heard water running in the sink.

  Michelle let out a long shaky exhale and slid down, trying not to think about the fact that she’d just had her bare ass on her dad’s desk. Thank god her parents had left early that morning to go to the beach.

  She retrieved her panties and shorts and put them on. She could leave the basement while he was in the bathroom. Just go and lock herself in one of the upstairs bathrooms, waiting until he’d left. But she wouldn’t make this easier for him.

  Besides, she wanted one last look at him.

  Michelle relived the last few minutes in her mind as she waited and tried not to cry. She’d never felt this way with anyone else before, and she knew no one in the future would ever come close. Gabe was special. He was hers.

  But it wasn’t meant to be, and she had to get used to that fact.

  She was still leaning against the desk with her arms crossed when Gabe exited the bathroom a few minutes later. He paused when he saw her, like maybe he’d expected her to be gone, but he crossed the carpet and, with the gentlest movements, took her face in his hands and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

  Michelle’s heart twisted into a knot as she watched him walk away. A heavy sense of finality settled over her.

  This was truly the end.

  Without a word, and without looking back, Gabe went up the stairs and disappeared from sight.

  Michelle waited until she heard the door at the top of the stairs close. Then, with trembling fingers, she pulled out her phone and sent a message to the Primas of Power group text.

  Michelle: He’s leaving.

  Ava’s reply came a second later.

  Ava: I’ll be right there.

  UPSTAIRS, GABE TOOK a quick shower and packed the last of his belongings.

  He hadn’t planned to have sex with Michelle, but damn it, he hadn’t been able to walk away from her without at least one last kiss. And when she’d reached for him, he’d given in to the impulse to be with her.

  One last time.

  No matter how much he’d prepared for this moment, it was still tearing him apart to leave her again. He’d thought doing it a second time would hurt less than the first, but if anything, it was worse. As close as they’d been as kids, it was nothing compared to how deeply they’d connected over the past week. Walking away from her downstairs had felt a bit like dying.

  It was tempting to leave now and head straight for the airport, thus avoiding yet another uncomfortable goodbye. But he recalled Michelle’s words from a few days before, from outside the quinceañera venue.

  It’s not too late, you know.

  For what?

  To run away.

  That’s your MO. Not mine.

  She was right. His natural inclination was to run away from emotionally uncomfortable situations, to protect himself by avoiding whatever was making him feel too much.

  Just like her MO was to make a joke, using humor to dispel the tension and change the subject. They both had their patterns.

  But Gabe had told his parents he would be there, and he couldn’t bring himself to bail on them.

  Hefting his suitcase and laptop bag, he went downstairs and out the Amatos’ back door. He didn’t see Michelle on his way out, and ignored the sense of unease that came from already missing her. Outside,
he crossed the backyards—now connected through a gap in the lattice fence—and strode up to his mother’s kitchen door. As Gabe let himself in, a knot formed in his stomach at how much it felt like the old days when he was a kid running back and forth between the two houses.

  This wasn’t even his house anymore. He probably should have knocked. But his mother looked up from the sink and greeted him with a big smile, so he knew it was okay.

  The kitchen was warm, and Gabe was immediately hit with a sweet, familiar smell. He sniffed the air as childhood memories assaulted him, and his mouth watered. “Mami, are you making pan dulce?”

  “Sí. I made mini conchas. You used to love them.” After Gabe dutifully kissed her cheek, she flipped back the towel covering a basket full of the round pastries.

  Damn, Gabe hadn’t had a concha in years. The Mexican sweet bread had been a staple of his childhood, but despite living in Los Angeles all this time, he hadn’t found himself frequenting any Mexican bakeries. Not when he so closely monitored his sugar intake. Gabe inhaled deeply, the smell of pan dulce easing some of his stress. It was hard to feel like the world was ending when you were surrounded by fresh-baked goods.

  “Toma uno,” his mom prompted, so Gabe picked one out of the basket and took a bite.

  “Ay dios mío,” he mumbled as sweetness exploded on his tongue. It was just as delicious as he remembered, although sweeter than he was used to now.

  “¿Te gusta?” his mother asked.

  “Sí, Mami. Está perfecto.”

  She gestured toward a tray with three bowl-size mugs of café con leche. Gabe lifted one and washed the bite of concha down with the sweet, milky coffee.

  Gabe heard footsteps on the stairs and a moment later his father entered the kitchen. To Gabe’s surprise, his father hugged him before reaching over and snagging a concha from the basket.

  “Should we sit in the living room?” Norma asked, but Gabe shook his head.