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Boy Minus Girl

Page 17

by Richard Uhlig


  Charity whispers to me, “This is the same theater Louise danced ballet in as a girl.”

  Soon the lights dim and organ music starts. A black-and-white title flickers on-screen: Pandora’s Box. I’m fully expecting to be bored by a silent movie made in 1929. Within minutes I’m hooked.

  A very sexy Louise Brooks, called Lulu in the movie, isn’t a hammy old-time actress at all. With her trademark black hair and severe bangs, she plays a dance-hall girl with a dazzling smile and naughty moves. In the fast-paced story she breaks up her boyfriend’s impending marriage to another woman, then winds up hiding out with her lover’s grown son, who is a sleazy gambler. There’s lust, gambling, adults cheating on each other, hookers, murders, and even lesbians (Lulu dances with a woman she’s attracted to on her wedding day!). No wonder Charity idolizes her. And at the breath-stealing end Lulu takes a final lover, who turns out to be none other than Jack the Ripper himself, and he murders her!

  When “The End” flashes on-screen, everyone applauds like crazy. The lights come up, and an old woman in a wheelchair is rolled out onstage by a tall bald man in a suit. Charity is the first on her feet, and by far the loudest clapper. I can’t see much of Miss Brooks from where we’re sitting, just that her long hair is a dark gray and she looks to have an oxygen tank beside her chair.

  The bald man turns out to be the mayor of Wichita. He’s about to give Louise the key to the city when Charity bolts into the aisle and toward the exit as if the building is on fire. Where is she going? I run after her.

  “What’s up?” I call out as I chase her down the stairway.

  “I have to meet her!”

  “Just don’t . . .”

  In the downstairs part of the theater I stand with Charity along the back wall while the mayor babbles about what an honor it is to have Miss Brooks back in Wichita. I can see Louise better from here, but still not great. A small plastic tube is hooked under her nose. Her face is remarkably wrinkle free, and her eyes are still stunners.

  “She’s so beautiful,” Charity whispers. I’ve never seen Charity so excited about anything (except for maybe Kristy Lynn).

  The mayor hands the microphone to Louise. In a forceful but winded voice she says, “Thank you. I feel that today I have finally made peace with my hometown. Or perhaps it’s made peace with me.”

  Pictures are taken, more applause.

  “Miss Brooks will now be greeting some people on the stage,” the mayor announces. No sooner does he say this than Charity scrambles down the aisle, where a line is fast forming. I struggle to keep up with her. We wait in line for twenty minutes as fans slowly file past the star, shaking her hand and getting her autograph. Charity’s eyes don’t deviate from Louise for a second. It’s when Louise starts to cough heavily that the mayor says over the microphone, “I’m sorry but Miss Brooks won’t be seeing anyone else. . . .”

  Charity jumps the line—jumps the line!—and bounds up onto the stage. I start to go after her but a security guard lays his big mitts on me.

  Charity kneels before Miss Brooks, who smiles. They talk for a good minute—it looks like a fairly intense conversation, with Charity nodding a lot. Finally Miss Brooks is wheeled offstage and Charity lopes back my way. She doesn’t look elated, which surprises me. She looks, well, a little let down.

  Later Charity and I amble along the path by the Arkansas River, the sun-reflected skyline of downtown Wichita towering behind us. Charity has been pretty subdued and preoccupied since meeting her idol.

  “Y’mind telling me what you and Louise talked about?” I ask.

  “She told me she was flattered she’s my idol,” Charity says, “but that I really don’t know her. And that if I did know her, I wouldn’t idolize her.”

  “Strange thing to tell a fan.”

  “Then she said, ‘Imitation is suicide.’ ”

  “Wow.”

  “ ‘But I respect everything you stand for, everything you’ve done,’ I told her. Her response was: ‘It’s more important you find out who you are and what you’re capable of ’. ”

  I glance back at Mom and Dad strolling about fifty feet behind us. Dad’s arm is around Mom and he kisses her cheek—something he would never dare do in downtown Harker City.

  Charity stops and leans against the wooden railing. “Problem is, Les, I’m not exactly sure who I am.”

  “Think I know what you mean.”

  “Do you? Sometimes I feel like there’s nothing to me. That’s what I love so much about Louise. She’s always had courage, she always knew what she wanted, never cared what others thought. Or so I thought.”

  Looking out over the brownish rippling water, I say, “You know, I idolized my uncle Ray. He was always so smooth, so cool. I wanted to be him. And then he came to stay with us . . . and, well, I realized I don’t want to be him. Still, I really admire the guy.”

  She turns to me and says, “You know something, I think Kristy Lynn did me a huge favor. Thanks to her, I can’t pretend any longer. Till now no one at school, besides you, knew the real me. Now everyone does. Like it or not, I have to be me when I go back and face everyone on Tuesday. The problem is, it scares me half to death.”

  I can’t help but laugh. “It’s kinda like me. I have to figure out how not to impersonate Uncle Ray, and still talk to girls.”

  “Well, Booger, looks like we’ve got our work cut out for us.”

  THIS IS A BORZOI BOOK PUBLISHED BY ALFRED A. KNOPF

  THIS IS A WORK OF FICTION. NAMES, CHARACTERS, PLACES, AND INCIDENTS EITHER ARE THE PRODUCT OF THE AUTHOR’S IMAGINATION OR ARE USED FICTITIOUSLY. ANY RESEMBLANCE TO ACTUAL PERSONS, LIVING OR DEAD, EVENTS, OR LOCALES IS ENTIRELY COINCIDENTAL.

  COPYRIGHT © 2008 BY RICHARD UHLIG

  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PUBLISHED IN THE UNITED STATES BY ALFRED A. KNOPF, AN IMPRINT OF RANDOM HOUSE CHILDREN’S BOOKS, A DIVISION OF RANDOM HOUSE, INC., NEW YORK.

  KNOPF, BORZOI BOOKS, AND THE COLOPHON ARE REGISTERED TRADEMARKS OF RANDOM HOUSE, INC.

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  LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA

  UHLIG, RICHARD ALLEN.

  BOY MINUS GIRL / RICHARD UHLIG. 1ST ED.

  P. CM.

  SUMMARY: WHEN HIS CHARMING BUT IRRESPONSIBLE UNCLE COMES TO VISIT HIS SMALL KANSAS HOMETOWN, FOURTEEN-YEAR-OLD LES ECKHARDT HOPES TO GET TIPS FROM HIM ABOUT SUCCEEDING WITH GIRLS, BUT HE LEARNS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT LESSONS FROM HIS STODGY AND PREDICTABLE PARENTS AND FRIENDSHIPS WITH A LESBIAN CLASSMATE AND ONE OF UNCLE RAY’S FORMER GIRLFRIENDS.

  [1. INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS—FICTION. 2. UNCLES—FICTION. 3. RESPONSIBILITY—FICTION. 4. LESBIANS—FICTION. 5. SEX—FICTION. 6. KANSAS—HISTORY—20TH CENTURY—FICTION.] I. TITLE.

  PZ7.U32578BO 2008

  [FIC]—DC22

  2008002566

  RANDOM HOUSE CHILDREN’S BOOKS SUPPORTS THE FIRST AMENDMENT AND CELEBRATES THE RIGHT TO READ.

  eISBN: 978-0-375-89136-6

  v3.0

 

 

 


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