How To Psychoanalyze Someone
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How to Psychoanalyze Someone
Scarlett Kennedy
Copyright © 2018 by Scarlett Kennedy. All Right Reserved.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of very brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.
Liability disclaimer
The information provided within this Book is for general informational purposes only. While we try to keep the information up-to-date and correct, there are no representations or warranties, express or implied, about the completeness, accuracy, reliability, suitability or availability with respect to the information, products, services, or related graphics contained in this eBook for any purpose. Any use of this information is at your own risk.
The methods describe within this Book are the author’s personal thoughts. They are not intended to be a definitive set of instructions for this project. You may discover there are other methods and materials to accomplish the same end result.
The information contained within this Book is strictly for educational purposes. If you wish to apply ideas contained in this Book, you are taking full responsibility for your actions.
The author has made every effort to ensure the accuracy of the information within this book was correct at time of publication. The author does not assume and hereby disclaims any liability to any party for any loss, damage, or disruption caused by errors or omissions, whether such errors or omissions result from accident, negligence, or any other cause.
Table of Contents
Introduction
Chapter One: Getting Them To Open Up
Chapter Two: Body Language
Chapter Three: Their Past14
Chapter Four: Their Belief Systems
Chapter Five: Defense Mechanisms
Chapter Six: Emotions
Chapter Seven: Personas They Wish To Be
Chapter Eight: Their Expectations
Conclusion: Personality Profile
Introduction
“Well, what do you think it means when they do that?”
“Gee, why do they act this way?”
“Does this mean they don’t care?”
“Do you think he’s acting that way because he’s insecure?”
Once upon a time, I was that person. Asking this question, calling my friends at 3 a.m hoping they’d have any logical answer for me. Zero answers were provided. Nothing made sense. Wondering why in the world people behaved the way they did. Slowly losing my mind attempting to understand people - is what motivated me to discover how to analyze any individual's mind.
Seven years ago, I started this journey. Leading people on, dangling their desires in front of their faces, instilling misery, and obsession. Reflecting upon my former motivations for such actions - escapes me now - considering the changes in my values, personality and current life. These rapid changes caused several identity and existential crises.
It’s been two years since I’ve written and published my first book. Since having experienced severe crises, my intent was to delete this entire book, and throw the manuscript in the trash. However, there was a lingering frustration that caused me to complete writing this book. The irritation was hearing people asking this question. Furthermore; the pain, confusion, and loss of sleep these people experienced.
What is psychoanalysis, and why is it important?
Psychoanalysis is making the unconscious conscious. Psychoanalysis and therapy is normally associated with excruciating mental breakdowns on a comfortable couch as they uncover the “dirty” contents of their subconscious minds.
In this case, you are not having a therapy session to uncover your target's scars in order to heal.You're to uncover their scars, lost dreams, untapped potential, their darkest shadows of their unconscious mind to control them - to make them obsessed with you.
Our unconscious mind is in charge of our behavior. The unconscious mind is 90 percent in charge, while our conscious self is 10 percent of our behavior. Only these things reside in the subconscious mind of your target. If you've read my first book - you should know by now that you must identify someone's ideal lover list. The first book was somewhat of an overview. Here, we explore psychoanalysis in depth.
Why I wrote this book
My readers wanted a more concentrated method of psychoanalysis. During my active manipulative bitch years, there were specific things I looked for, to uncover information about a person. All the information I held was powerful. My readers knew this, and asked for it. The way I see it, is our behaviors are something of a metaphor. Psychoanalyzing someone is like someone during the winter season. They are layered in many clothes. Psychoanalyzing is stripping someone of all their clothes, seeing their full vulnerable naked body, and into the abyss of their soul. Internalizing the psychological make up of someone is quite risky. What you do with the information can nurture their hearts with love, or burn their souls. Perhaps both? That's up to you to decide.
Who is this book for?
For those of you good souls, you can use this to strengthen your understanding of your partner's needs. Thus, you are able to fulfill their needs and you're able to understand your own needs. If your intentions are not altruistic - you can use this book for your own personal gain. Whether it be getting that girl who otherwise would have never fallen in love with you - to do exactly that. Perhaps you want to stand out in the workplace and climb your way to the top. This will help you curb the time it would have originally taken - without this book.
How is this book different?
A repetitive pattern in: books, videos, and other informational products have done their research. Excellent - but have you applied? Application here isn’t testing these theories in a lab, or controlled environment. I’m talking psychoanalyzing yourself, taking the theories and applying them to the right people. What I’ve noticed is people recite studies professionals have done in a lab. While I have much appreciation for the people who conduct the research, followed by the eager people who share the research - that’s not going to prove it works on the streets. What’s different about me? I’ve applied all techniques to myself as well as understanding my former targets. Other experts discuss one technique applied to all, that is simply impossible. I cannot stress this enough: one size does not fit all. That’s implying you have identical tastes and preferences compared to everyone around you.
How to read this book
I don’t believe in babbling, beating around the bush, or vague explanations. However, I do believe in clarity. Thus, each chapter starts with an introduction, then splits into sub-sections. Each subsection starts off with its own introduction. Followed by: Why it’s important, how to discover specific information, an example and lastly, what to do with this information - which serves as the conclusion. No frantically searching for information, no confusion.
Chapter One
Getting Them To Open Up
What's a psychoanalysis without your target opening up?
Why is this important?
You need reassurance that your victim can feel unguarded around you. Getting your target to open up is allowing them to be vulnerable. Vulnerability shows your target feels safe. Granted, the feeling of safety and security leads to exposure of how they're feeling, and their secrets. Additionally, if they can't tell you anything - you'd only be able to go by behaviours, reactions, and body language. These things are very telling, yet the cherry on top is them - verbally sharing. Sharing dark secret
s, and opening up gives anyone the illusion of a bond forming, and growing.
Do you hear people complaining about how other people wouldn't/don't open up to them? There’s a reason for that. Here's a comparison of the characteristics of people your target may open up to, versus the types of people your target may close up to.
The characteristics of people other people open up to:
Firstly, to read my book - it requires you to open your mind. If you read my first book: How to Make Someone Obsessed with You, you'll realize you have to open up to listen. Additionally, an open mind is required to play various roles for your target.
People will unconsciously pick up cues that indicate you'd be a great person to vent to or not. If you are sarcastic, narrow minded, and judgemental then why would anyone want to express themselves to you? An open minded person shows they are open to suggestion, and have flexibility on their beliefs. As a result they try to understand the other person’s perspective. Here is the list:
A great listener:
There are four types of listening:
1. Goes in one ear and out the other.
2. You're hearing what they say but you're mentally creating clever responses.
3. You're hearing what they say but your mind is filled with something else; what's for dinner tonight, god look at that pimple, god he's so hot. Oh maybe I should watch that movie tonight.
4. This one is true listening: your mind is clear. You're outright present and only listening to the other person. You're not just listening - you're internalizing what the other person is saying.
Again, people will habitually recognize which listener category you fall into. This'll determine whether someone will open up to you or not.
They trust you:
Trust is the key factor. This is the first thing you'll have to establish. If you can't establish trust, you can't create anything. Without this in mind - the only thing you'll create would be rejection. Trust isn't exclusively about "not telling anyone”. Trust is about trusting the person won't judge you. Furthermore they won't put you down. Nor will the person use the confidential information as blackmail further into the relationship.
All these gestures sends the other person a message: you matter. I care about you. Haven't you felt that way around someone who you could be genuine around? That anything you say matters - that you're significant? I know I have. If someone chooses to express themselves to you - don’t pride yourself on how great it was. Under those circumstances, don’t assume they’ll do it again. This is presumptuous. Your target may have been desperate and unknowingly opened up their mouths. Just allow them to do so without perpetually speaking of “that one time they opened to you.” Otherwise - it will be one time. Go with the flow. Don’t force things. You’ll build more rapport.
The ideal candidate for people to NOT open up:
● Judge mental:
A judgemental person doesn’t have to say “oh my god, you shouldn’t have done that” - to be judgemental. Technically, a judgement is placing a label on something. Thus if you tell someone “that is good.” can be great - yet if your target doesn’t perceive what they are sharing with you to be good, there will be tension. Given this, the both of you will have different perceptions of what is “good and bad”. This can result in your target feeling tense around you. Because they know they wouldn’t measure up to your standards of good versus bad. The reason we’re judgemental is because that’s how we make sense of things in this crazy world. It’s how we go from disorder to order.
● Interrupt while you are speaking:
This one is evident. If you can’t let someone complete their sentence, put this book down and go learn some manners. Coming back is optional.
● Tell you your feelings aren't valid:
Someone may speak of the past and you’d hear “get it over it, it’s the past.” Guess what? The past heavily affects us and shapes our perspective. Saying this, invalidates how they’re feeling. We are aware this is the past, yet it still affects us. The difference between the people everyone opens up to and the ones people avoid, is the open person will listen and tell you everything is okay.
● Telling people:
Sometimes these types can be hard to spot. An easy indicator of someone like this would be:
“Don’t worry I won’t tell. Just tell me.”
They will tell you other people’s secrets.
● Tell the other person how they should and shouldn't feel:
This goes hand in hand with invalidating someone’s feelings.
● Fake sympathy:
April 07, 2013 was the day my former best friend committed suicide. A girl called me and “cried.” Most people can see through bullshit (unless they’re doing the bullshitting.) And, faking sympathy can put you in anyone’s bad books. That girl is definitely in my bad books. Plus, you don’t have to cry to show me your sympathy!
● They make it a competition:
Whose pain is worse. Who went through worse. The other person makes it about them.
An example:
I used to have a friend who I would vent to. Then he would start talking about himself. Once, I was venting about my mom then he said "well you’re lucky your mom only did that to you - my mom did ____ to me. That's worse. So why do you even feel bad?" This is a person I knew I could never open up to again (although we stayed friends for a few years).
● Person bragging about how many people open up to them:
This is like trophy wives/husbands except they're trophy open uppers. So really - it's not about caring that you need to open up - it's about playing the rescuer and using this as a trophy. Whoever opens up to this type of person - they've just won another trophy.
That sums up the kinds of people that people wouldn't and shouldn't open up to.
Just notice - do people actually open up to you? Have they said why? Was it a one time thing or was it consistent?
What to do with this information:
If you seriously want to be able to psychoanalyze your victim you must portray the character of a fantastic listener, and the therapist.
Chapter Two
Body Language
Body language is the language of which our subconscious minds unfold via our body movements, facial expressions, and gestures.
You know the quote actions speak louder than words? Well that's what our bodies do. Our words are only 10% of our minds. Body language showcases 90% of what we truly feel. You can determine if your victim is lying, feeling self assured, troubled, somber, cheerful, among others. Don’t listen to their words. Rather, observe their body language.
Body language is essential in communication and psychoanalysis. For psychoanalysis in relation to obsession, body language will determine a few things:
● The truth versus lies.
● What is/has hurt them.
● Attraction versus repulsion.
● What makes them happy, and what their values are.
If they are telling you the truth, or they are lying:
It is in our genes to lie. We sometimes (or always) lie because the truth hurts, lies can be a form of denial, to make our lives appear much more grand than it is. Other reasons for lying can prevent someone from getting hurt, or the complete opposite: to hurt someone. There are a million reasons why we lie. The trick is to figure out when your victim is lying, and how their bodies react when they’re lying.
Truthful Body Language:
● Palms facing out.
● Consistent eye contact.
● Steady breath.
Deceptive Body Language:
● Overcompensation.
● Constantly looking around.
● Looking up to the left (for right handers) vice versa, for left handers.
● Blushing.
● Pauses.
If they are attracted to you or repulsed:
One of the utmost critical things in leading someone into their obsession with you, would be attraction. Hate and/or repu
lsion can make one obsessed as well, but that’s not the goal here. A pleasant obsession is what we’re aiming for, here.
Attractive Body Language:
● Feet pointed towards you.
● Torso pointed towards you.
● Dilated pupils. (If they’re constricted - they may be nervous).
● Raised eyebrow.
● Parted lips. (Think primal).
● Upward curve on mouth.
● They look at you when they laugh.
● Smile with their eyes.
● Chest is open, open body language.
● Mirroring your body language.
Repulsed Body Language:
● Feet pointed towards door.
● Torso pointed elsewhere - primarily towards the door.
● Arms crossed - closed body language.