Halo

by R. C. Stephens

  “I’ve been to a few competitions,” I reply, “but this is my first national. I was born in LA. We just moved out here six months ago. And you?”

  “Ah, a California girl…” He grins as if there’s an inside joke I’ve missed. “I was born in Florida. My family moved out here when I was two. We live in Rogers Park.” Holy crap, his smile is sexy. My insides are shaking and I don’t like this loss of control.

  “Oh! I’m in Rogers Park too,” I respond with an attempt at nonchalance, but I feel as if I fail miserably when my voice rises an octave. I know Rogers Park is a relatively big neighborhood but he can’t live too far away. The thought excites me.

  “Well, Halo, I will need to see you around Rogers Park then,” he says with yet another flirtatious grin. Butterflies dance in my chest. Jesus! Pathetic. He flirts well. He turns and goes back to his team and my heart continues to flutter. I am no longer focused on the competition when delectable Thomas is flexing his muscles on the bench beside my team.

  The competition gets under way and we win the first round. When Thomas gets in the water, I feel gooey-eyed watching him. His team is super good and he is definitely the star. My stomach flips in the most delicious way watching him.

  Amanda nudges me again. “Thomas has the hots for you. You should totally hook up with him.” I’m not sure what she means by hooking up exactly, but I definitely want to be seeing him again.

  When Thomas leaves the water after his team basically creams their competition, he walks directly over to me, sopping wet. My hormones are kicking in big time and I feel like my insides are doing somersaults.

  “Nice job.” I smile nervously.

  “Thanks,” he replies, running a hand over his buzzed brown hair. “I love swimming and I love the competition. How about you? How did you get into it?”

  “Ah well, I used to do swim competitions back home and when we moved out here my parents thought I should do a team sport and water polo just made sense since I’m not very athletic otherwise.” I try to think of some way to continue our conversation and ask, “How about you? Are you expecting some university scholarship or something? I saw how good you are.”

  He chuckles and looks down to the ground. When he looks up, I notice again how gorgeous his eyes are—a dark blue I’ve never seen before.

  “Not exactly,” he says. “I am not going to college. I compete because I want to apply to be a Navy SEAL. It’s my ticket out of Rogers Park,” he explains.

  “You don’t like Rogers Park?” I asked with a hint of curiosity. According to my parents it’s the best place on earth. I beg to differ.

  “We aren’t from the same area of Rogers Park I’m guessing, but no I don’t like it. I live with my father and I can’t wait to leave. I’ve been training since the day I turned fifteen. There’s a SEAL training camp in Great Lakes, Illinois and that’s where I’m headed. Then I’ll be property of the navy and allow them to take me wherever that may be as long as it’s away from here.”

  I can’t help but sulk.

  “Yeah, I wouldn’t mind going back to LA,” I mutter.

  “How old are you anyway?”

  “I’m fifteen. And you?”

  “I just turned seventeen,” he replies, biting his lower lip again. I wonder if it’s a nervous habit. “Are you going to give me your number?” he asks. He obviously didn’t have self-esteem issues. I look over to my side and I see Amanda practically drooling as she watches us.

  “Ah!” He takes a step back as if he’s tripped and holds his hand up to his chest. “I’m wounded. You seriously need to think about it? Well, that’s a first.” He shakes his head.

  Oh geez! He must have lots of girlfriends. Leave it up to me to be lusting after a player.

  “Well, if that’s a first then you don’t need to worry,” I snap at him, not liking his arrogance. “You must have them waiting in line for you.”

  He looks almost bewildered and remains painfully quiet. It makes me feel like I have the upper hand and I like it for once. Maybe I’ve been drooling too much and he senses it. Not happening.

  “There’s a line, but it’s your number I want,” he replies with a cocky grin.

  “Thomas, I am not that kind of girl,” I answer harshly.

  “Halo, I know you aren’t and that’s why I want your number.” His tone is filled with challenge.

  “Fine,” I snap again. I’m not even sure why I’m irritated. I should probably feel special. I look around, wondering where I can find him a piece of paper. Amanda stands and walks over to the assistant coach. She rips a piece of paper from his clipboard and takes his pen. After she hands them to me, I write my number down and pass it to Thomas.

  “I’ll be calling, Halo. You can be sure of that.” He grins, holding the paper and waving it at me like he just won the lotto. Then he walks away without a goodbye.

  We come in first that day for the girls’ competition and Thomas’s team also comes in first for the boys. I grin for the rest of the ride back home and when I lay in bed that night thinking of Thomas’s smile and his blue eyes, I feel delicious butterflies floating happily in my chest and stomach.

  I just can’t get the self-assured Thomas Wells out of my mind. He said he was from the other side of Rogers Park. Did he mean the lower-income side? That stuff doesn’t matter to me anyway. I know my father hopes I’ll become a doctor like him one day, but I’m still undecided.

  Three days pass and I don’t hear from Thomas. I sulk, figuring he’s just another stupid player.

  When he finally calls on the fourth day, I’m not sure if I want to talk to him. “Hello,” I say quietly into the phone.

  “Halo, it’s Thomas. Would you like to hang out tonight?”

  “Tonight? Uh…”

  “Is it short notice?”

  “No, uh... It’s just…” The sound of his deep voice has me dying to see him again. But I have a science test to study for… “Yeah tonight is great,” I say, quickly choosing him over studying. His chuckle makes me feel like I’ve made a great choice.

  “Okay,” he says. “Give me your address. I will pick you up in twenty minutes.”

  I give him my address, put down my phone and panic. Is this a date? Like a real date? I glance at my closet. Should I change out of my jeans? Put on makeup? I decide not to worry about what I look like. I have enough to worry about—like what Thomas and I might do when we “hang out.” I was new at this.

  Twenty minutes later the doorbell rings and I plummet down the stairs, hoping to open the door before my mother does. I don’t make it, though. My mom opens the door and there he is—Thomas Wells with clothes on. He’s wearing a ripped pair of blue jeans and a black leather jacket. His brown buzz cut has sprinkles of snow in it. He smiles widely when he sees me.

  “Mom… uh… this is Thomas Wells. We are going out for a bit.” It’s not much of an explanation, but I hope my mother won’t embarrass me by asking a bunch of questions.

  Thomas extends his hand and my mom shakes it hesitantly while glaring at me. Thomas Wells looks like the epitome of a bad boy and I don’t care at all. In fact I kind of like it. I notice he’s holding a motorcycle helmet in his other hand. Uh-oh…

  “Halo, a motorcycle in this weather is like a death trap,” Mom says in her loudest “no way” voice.

  “Oh, don’t worry Mrs…” Thomas pauses. I'd never told him my last name.

  “Pearson,” my mother inserts. I avoid her eyes and quickly put on my coat and boots.

  “Mrs. Pearson, I’m very careful and I drive slowly.” He tries to sound reassuring, but the picture he makes is working against him. The helmet, the leather jacket, the hot-as-hell grin. I know my parents won’t be down with the idea of me leaving with him at all.

  “I’m sorry, Halo. I don’t think so,” my mother says apologetically.

  An uncharacteristic surge of defiance comes over me. There is no way in hell I’m not going to go out with Thomas. He makes me feel good. I like him. I’m tired of my parents try
ing to control my life. I hadn’t had a choice about moving to Chicago. Tonight it was going to be my choice to hang out with my new friend.

  “I’ll see you later, Mom. I’ll be fine. I won’t be home too late.” I give her a peck on the cheek. She wasn’t expecting straight-out defiance from me, because she stands there in stunned silence as I take Thomas by the hand and lead him to the door.

  When we’re outside, I close the door with a solid thud. He looks down at me with an amused grin.

  “Come on,” I urge. “We need to keep moving before she comes out here and drags my ass back inside.”

  Thomas’s eyes sparkle. “Okay, okay. Put this on.” He passes me the helmet. I put it on and we climb on his bike.

  “Wow a motorcycle…this is my first time,” I admit feeling my nerves build. I want to spend time with Thomas but I’m not an idiot. I know my mom is right about motorcycles being dangerous in the snow.

  “Sorry, I can’t afford a car. I work as a mechanic’s helper part time. He’s a nice guy. He helped me build this bike from old scraps so I can get around. I know it sucks in the winter. I wasn’t kidding. I’ll take it slow.”

  “That’s impressive, Thomas. I can’t believe you built this from scratch.” I grin a little too much. I try to tone it down a bit. Being with Thomas is exciting. Being with Thomas on his bike is even more exciting. My life is boring and this is definitely out of my norm. True to his word, he drives slowly and carefully through the neighborhood and onto a street with lots of markets and shops. He pulls up to a coffee shop and we go inside.

  We find a table and I sit, keeping my coat zipped and my hands shoved in my pockets. “You’re freezing,” he says, almost like he’s chiding himself. “What can I get you to drink?” He rubs his hands together. His skin looks red and chapped and as cold as mine.

  “I’ll have an Earl Grey tea with milk,” I reply with a slight blush. I’m on my first date with the hottest guy I’ve ever laid eyes on. He gets the drinks and we settle in, talking for hours as if we’re old friends. He tells me how his mother left him when he was two and how he lives with his abusive alcoholic father. His openness causes me to open up too. We’ve only just met, but there’s something so comfortable about the way he watches me from across the table, like he’s intrigued by me and he cares what I say.

  After talking to him for about three hours I know more about him than I know about my teammates—girls I’ve spent twenty hours a week with for the last six months.

  “Is your father why you want to leave so badly?” I ask him.

  “Yeah, pretty much. I live in a shithole. I need to get out of this place.”

  “Why don’t you use your skills at water polo to get a scholarship? You could probably go to a university for free.” My parents have always taught me that education is number one.

  His eyebrows come together and the lines around his mouth crease deeply. “Halo, we don’t come from the same place. My father has always told me I’m dirt. He blames me for my mother taking off. There is no way I’m going to college. I’m going to be a SEAL. That’s what I want. I’ll show them I’m not a nobody.” He jerks his chin sharply. He won’t argue about this point.

  I looked down at his strong hands. They’re gripping his mug tightly. “Thomas, I have a feeling that your father doesn’t know ass-shit.” There’s surprising vehemence in my tone. I want to stomp across town and kick his father’s behind.

  Thomas’s face contorts at my words, almost like he doesn’t believe me.

  “Seriously, Thomas,” I say. “Your father sounds messed up. From what I’ve seen since meeting you, you’re a pretty awesome guy.” I sound so sure I surprise even myself. It’s taken me just a few hours to realize there were no walls where Thomas Wells and I are concerned.

  For such a badass looking boy on the outside he sure sent me for a loop. He leans across the table and my heart skips a beat as he places a soft kiss on my lips. My eyes close and my breath quickens. I perform an internal happy dance, thinking it’s the best first kiss a girl could ask for.

  A stupid grin erupts on my face. But then Thomas says, “I’m sorry for kissing you.”

  I’m confused. I’m sure those kinds of kisses shouldn’t be followed by an apology.

  “Don’t be sorry,” I tell him. I want him to do it again.

  “I don’t want you to think I was using you or something.” He pulls his gaze away from me. “I like you,” he says shyly. I get the feeling he’s not shy with girls very often. Probably never.

  “Thomas Wells, is this a first for you?” I ask with an almost mocking tone.

  “Yes, it is, Halo Pearson.” He grins widely, his out-sized self-esteem returning.

  “I’m guessing you’ve had lots of girlfriends,” I say, narrowing my eyes.

  “I have, Halo. I’m not going to lie. But you really are the first one I’ve liked.”

  I blush again and he gives me another light kiss. I feel my body gently float up to the clouds.

  “So what do you do for fun?” Thomas asks, looking at me intently.

  I look down at my empty mug, feeling embarrassed. “I read books.”

  When I glance up at him, his eyes are wide. “Me too.”

  “Really?” I ask, surprised. I haven’t pegged him as a bookworm type.

  “Yeah, I work out a lot. I need to be in shape for when I sign up to be a SEAL. I heard boot camp is brutal. When I’m not training, I read. We don’t have cable. I get books from the library.”

  “Wow. So let me guess, Thomas. You compare yourself to Ralph from—”

  “Halo, I think I just fell in love with you,” he says, cutting off my sentence.

  “Huh? How do you know what I wanted to say?”

  “You said ‘Ralph’. You’ve read Golding’s Lord of the Flies.” It’s a statement, not a question.

  I nod. “Is Ralph your inspiration? The boy who represents order and civilization,” I continue with my analysis and comparison of the protagonist, Ralph. “He watches how the other boys give in to bloodlust and savagery and yet he doesn’t succumb. You are a calculating guy, Thomas. You are doing everything you can to make a better life for yourself, and joining the navy means that you also want to fight the bad guys and save society.”

  Thomas leans back in his chair and gives me a panty-dropping grin. “Halo Pearson, everything about this night has been unexpected. Your observations are close, but what you forgot is that when Ralph kills the boar he experiences the thrill of bloodlust and violence. There is evil within Ralph too as within all humans. He then finds himself in despair, but it’s his desperation that enables him to cast down the Lord of the Flies.”

  I’m in awe when he continues, “Don’t frown, pretty girl. It’s not a completely tragic ending. There is good. If you see me as Ralph, then my father is Jack, the antagonist that represents savagery. I don’t intend to let the savages win.” He winks.

  I smile widely. “I’m glad. I think you’re pretty amazing.”

  Something that seems dark and painful passes over his features for a brief second. He smiles but it looks forced. I’m not sure what just happened.

  He looks at his wristwatch. “Whoa, it’s really late. I should get you home. It’s a school night. I don’t need your parents hating me. I have to take you out again.”

  When Thomas drops me back home, he helps me off his motorcycle and removes my helmet. He walks me to the door. Before I go inside, he takes me in his arms and drops his head toward mine. Our lips collide, but when the kiss begins he’s slow and gentle, running his tongue along mine. Hot, red fire shoots between my thighs.

  I want more. I place my hands on the back of his neck, drawing him closer. The kiss grows even hungrier as our tongues collide and I learn his taste. He’s sweet from the cocoa but there are layers there that I can’t wait to get to know. I’m drawn to him, need more of him.

  He pulls away, placing his hands on my shoulders as he stares down at me with dazed eyes. He’s panting like I am.

/>   “Uh, yeah. Okay… Wow.” He exhales a long breath and runs both hands over his buzz cut. “You have a great night, Halo Pearson. I will need to see you again soon.”

  He walks down the steps of my front porch and climbs on his bike. Again, there’s no goodbye.

  No goodbye…

  January 15, 2008

  Rogers Park, Chicago

  Halo

  My eyes open. Nurse Judy is standing beside my bed with a slight smile. “You must have been having quite a dream,” she says, patting my shoulder. “You and the baby are both doing good. Your contractions are closer now. We must be getting close. I’ll find the doctor and have him come check you,” she says before leaving the room.

  I’m halfway between dreamland and being awake. I’ve dreamt about my past with Thomas so many times. The good times and the bad. As I think back to those times I remember the chip on his shoulder. He was the boy from the wrong side of town. Not only did his father put him down, my parents didn’t accept him either.

  Right now I try to concentrate on the good. I need to relax for my baby. The day I met Thomas was one of the best days of my life. Getting married was a great day. And today will be amazing because I will be meeting my son.

  There’s a weird beeping noise on my monitor and my heart begins to beat rapidly. The doctor arrives and checks the monitors. His brow furrows and he places a hand on mine. “Halo, the baby’s heart rate is dropping. We need to get you in for an emergency C-section.”

  “Will my baby be okay?” I ask as my eyes fill with tears. I feel droplets of sweat break out along my forehead. I feel like I can’t breathe.

  “Relax, Halo,” Nurse Judy says as she takes the doctor’s place at my side. “Breathe. You need to stay calm. It will be better for you and the baby.”

  “Relax?”

  “Yes,” she says calmly.

  I see colors flying past my eyes. There are lots of doctors around me or maybe nurses. Everyone’s wearing blue scrubs. My heart thumps quickly and I can hear each beat ringing loud in my ears. I’m sweating and the room feels stifling.

  A bright light shines in my face. It looks like a halo. It reminds me of my parents. My father was an obstetrician and would always run to the hospital at night to deliver babies. I wish he were here now to help my little one. The doctors talk amongst themselves. I’m too panicked to understand what they’re saying.