by Sarah Morgan
Tia stared at him.
How? How could she do that? How did she know that he wasn’t going to hurt her?
She just couldn’t bring herself to take that chance.
‘We’ve got patients waiting,’ she croaked, and he gave a wry smile.
‘Of course. This is the NHS. There are always patients waiting. We need to talk, Tia, but I agree that this is not a good time.’ He stood to one side to let her pass him. ‘Who is this lady you want me to see? Is she the reason you’re upset?’
Tia walked briskly past him, ignoring his last comment. ‘It’s a booking visit,’ she told him. ‘First baby, no problems that I can see. She just needs a routine medical check.’
He followed her out of the room. ‘Will you chaperone?’
Tia nodded and took him through to meet Karen.
He talked to her calmly for a few minutes about the baby and then examined Karen’s heart and lungs.
‘That all sounds perfectly normal,’ he said finally, looping the stethoscope around his neck. He finished his examination, scribbled in the notes and then leaned against the desk.
‘So…’ His voice was warm and caressing. ‘Tia has been telling me all about your conversation.’
Tia glanced at Luca with a puzzled frown. What was he talking about? She hadn’t mentioned their conversation.
Karen laughed. ‘I’ve bored her to tears,’ she admitted with an apologetic smile. ‘All I can talk about is this baby and how much I want it. I was absolutely desperate to get pregnant and I can’t quite believe it’s finally happened.’
Luca gave her a warm smile but his eyes rested on Tia. ‘Having a baby is a wonderful thing,’ he said quietly, ‘although some women have very mixed feelings and that is very natural, of course.’
Tia’s heart started to beat more rapidly. Was he addressing his remarks to her? Had he guessed how she felt about being pregnant?
‘I don’t have mixed feelings,’ Karen stated emphatically. ‘I’m completely delighted.’
Luca shifted his gaze back to the patient. ‘Good.’ He gave her a brief smile and stood up. ‘You’re in excellent health, Karen. You’ll be going to your GP next but if you have any problems you know you can phone us.’
With a last smile he left the room, closing the door quietly behind him.
‘Oh, that man is totally gorgeous,’ Karen drooled as she pulled on her jumper. ‘Can you imagine being involved with someone who looks like him? I’d be in a permanent state of faint.’
Tia coloured and Karen gave a gasp and clapped her hand over her mouth.
‘Oh, no! You’re not…’ Her eyes widened and she gave a groan. ‘You are, aren’t you? And I’ve just put my foot in it.’
‘It doesn’t matter,’ Tia reassured her quickly. ‘And, anyway, you’re right. He is gorgeous.’
Karen looked at her dreamily, embarrassment obviously forgotten. ‘Does he speak to you in Italian?’
Tia laughed and closed the notes. ‘Sometimes. But I don’t usually understand a word of it, I’m afraid.’ She changed the subject quickly. ‘As Dr Zattoni said, your next appointment is with your GP, but you know you can always call us with any problems.’
‘Thanks.’ Karen stood up and patted her stomach. ‘Do you think I’m crazy, being so excited?’
‘No.’ Tia managed a smile. ‘Not crazy.’
Lucky.
If only her own attitude to pregnancy was so simple.
Tia watched Karen go with mixed emotions, then she worked her way through a steady list of patients and was relieved to stop for a breather when Luca caught up with her later that afternoon.
‘Sharon called for you but you were with a patient.’ He lowered his voice, aware that people were probably listening. ‘She’s invited us to supper this evening but I wasn’t sure if you’d be too tired. I said I’d call her back.’
‘I’d like to go.’ Tia stroked her blonde hair behind her ear. ‘What about you? You’d like her husband—he’s a GP.’
He nodded slowly. ‘I met him briefly at the wedding.’ He gave a wry smile. ‘But I have to admit that I didn’t take much notice of him then. I’ll tell her yes, but we won’t stay late because you look exhausted again and you were so stressed earlier.’
‘It’s this pregnancy business,’ Tia muttered. ‘Tiring work.’
He frowned. ‘Have you spoken to Dan yet?’
Tia’s eyes slid away from his. ‘Not yet,’ she murmured, purposely vague. ‘Give me time.’
‘I’ll give you time,’ he said softly, ‘but not too much time. Remember that, Tia. Either book yourself in or I will do it for you.’
Before she had time to accuse him of more male arrogance he turned on his heel and strode away, leaving her staring after him.
With a great effort of will she got on with her work and was forced to call Luca again when she examined a woman who was 32 weeks pregnant and discovered that the baby was breech.
‘Does that matter?’ Sally Clarke looked at her anxiously and Tia gave her a reassuring smile.
‘Not at all, but we do refer breech presentations to the doctor.’
Luca walked into the room at that moment and Tia explained what she’d found.
Sally was starting to look anxious. ‘I really don’t want to have a Caesarean section,’ she admitted. ‘It’s the one thing I dread. Will I have to?’
Luca shook his head. ‘Not necessarily. We will need to keep close eyes on you but a vaginal delivery is sometimes possible. It depends on a number of factors.’
Sally bit her lip. ‘Can you turn him around?’
‘Not at 32 weeks,’ Luca told her. ‘He would just turn around again. But that may be an option in a few weeks’ time. We’ll keep an eye on you and maybe try turning him nearer the time of delivery.’
Luca ordered a number of tests and examined Sally himself.
‘I really hurt under my ribs,’ Sally grumbled, rubbing herself gently, and Tia smiled sympathetically.
‘That’s because his head is pressing on your diaphragm.’
She and Luca spent a long time with Sally and Tia made a mental note to try and be on duty when she delivered. She knew that many obstetricians sectioned breech presentations routinely, but clearly Luca was willing to consider letting her try for a normal delivery.
Her shift over, Tia decided to nip up to Special Care to see how little Harry Gibbs was doing. Everyone on the unit was keeping tabs on Sue’s progress and were thrilled to hear that she was stable.
Harry was still in an incubator and Eddie was sitting in a chair next to him, reading out loud from a children’s book.
‘How’s he doing, Eddie?’ Tia peered into the incubator and Eddie closed the book with a sigh.
‘Well, they tell me I’ve been lucky. Apparently he could have had all sorts of breathing problems, but he seems fine apart from the fact that his sats keep dropping. Whatever that means.’ He gave her a rueful look. ‘I’ve been swamped with so many medical terms in the last twenty-four hours that I’ve given up asking for translations.’
Tia smiled. ‘If they’re telling you that his sats are dropping, they mean that his oxygen saturation is a little low at times, which is why they’re giving him the oxygen. But clearly he’s doing brilliantly. Have you talked to Sue?’
‘She’s still unconscious,’ he told her, ‘but I sat by her all night. I talked about the baby. Said all the things we would have said together had we known she was pregnant.’
Tia slipped an arm around his shoulders. ‘This has been such a shock, hasn’t it? And you’re coping so well.’
‘I don’t feel as though I am.’ Eddie stared at his son. ‘Do you realise, we haven’t even got a cot at home?’
‘Well, he won’t be ready to go home for a while, so don’t worry about that,’ Tia advised. ‘Just get through the next few days. You’ve got plenty of time to think about the detail. When did you last sleep?’
He looked at her blankly. ‘I’ve no idea. Two days ago?’
‘Why don’t you go home?’
Eddie shook his head. ‘No way. Not until I know Sue’s going to be all right.’
Tia racked her brains. ‘Wait here.’
She found one of the SCBU nurses and explained the problem. ‘Is your parents’ room free?’
They had a room available for parents with severely sick children.
The nurse frowned. ‘It’s free, but if we have a very ill baby—’
‘Then Eddie will have to move out,’ Tia agreed. ‘But at the moment it’s the only chance the guy has to get some sleep. Please?’
The nurse nodded. ‘I’ll clear it with Sister. Tell him to help himself.’
‘Thanks.’
Tia gave the news to Eddie and helped him settle himself in the small but adequate bedroom.
Then she glanced at her watch and realised that Luca was probably waiting for her downstairs. And they were going to Sharon’s.
CHAPTER SIX
THE minute they arrived at Sharon’s, Tia knew it was going to be a difficult evening.
Sharon was obviously dying for an update and barely waited until Luca was out of earshot before asking, ‘Well?’
‘Well, what?’ Tia shrugged out of her coat and hung it in the hallway, one eye on Luca as he strolled through to the sitting room with Richard, Sharon’s husband.
Sexual awareness poured through her veins as she watched Luca sit down on the sofa, stretching long, muscular legs out in front of him with the easy confidence of someone totally at ease with themselves.
He was on call and had dressed smartly in well-cut trousers and a black polo-neck jumper that accentuated his Latin looks.
‘He’s stunning,’ Sharon muttered, following her gaze, and Tia pulled herself together, wishing she was better at hiding her feelings.
‘Looks aren’t important, Shaz.’
And she was fast discovering that there was more to Luca Zattoni than just looks. She’d learned more about him in the past few days than in all the weeks that she’d lived with him in Italy.
‘I want to hear everything.’ Sharon glanced after the men and then gestured towards the kitchen. ‘Come and help me in here. We can talk in peace.’
Tia followed dutifully, her eyes flickering over the various pans boiling on the cooker.
‘Can I do something?’
‘Yes.’ Sharon whipped a pan off the stove and placed it on a mat. ‘You can give me an update on your love life. The suspense is killing me.’
Tia shrugged. ‘There’s nothing to tell. We’re fine.’
‘Fine? What’s that supposed to mean?’ Her friend bustled around the kitchen, warming plates and draining vegetables. ‘I’ve been worrying myself to death all week and all you can say is that you’re fine? Elaborate! Are you talking? Are you sleeping together?’
‘Shaz!’ Tia glanced at the door and prayed that Luca wouldn’t appear. She’d die of embarrassment! ‘Of course we’re not sleeping together. We’re getting to know each other, remember?’
Sharon stared at her. ‘And he was OK with that?’
‘Yes, of course.’ Tia smiled brightly, trying not to think about the level of tension that was steadily building between her and Luca. It was anyone’s guess which one of them was going to explode first.
Sharon lifted a casserole dish out of the oven, obviously unsure what to say. ‘And are you getting to know each other better?’
Tia shifted in her seat. ‘Shaz, it’s only been a few days.’
‘But you weren’t sure how you felt about him as a person.’ Sharon popped a spoon in the casserole and tasted it. ‘Do you like him?’
Did she like him?
Tia thought of the times he’d held her when she’d been sick, of the omelette he’d made and the way he’d slept in the spare room even though he must have been hideously uncomfortable. She remembered the candles and the shopping and the warmth he showed to patients and his obvious skill at practising medicine.
‘Yes,’ she said finally, her tongue licking her dry lips. ‘Yes, I like him.’
‘And has he mentioned Luisa?’
‘No.’
It was the one black spot. He still hadn’t been completely honest with her.
‘Need any help, Shaz?’ Richard stuck his head round the door and looked at his wife. ‘We’re starving to death out here.’
‘Don’t rush me.’ Sharon shot him a reproving look. ‘You can carry the plates through if you want to help.’
The meal was superb and Luca gave Sharon a warm smile. ‘This is excellent,’ he said quietly, a smile playing around his mouth as he complimented her. ‘Truly excellent.’
‘Oh. Well…thank you.’ Sharon blushed, flustered by the attention, and Tia watched Luca, her eyes resting on his jaw and then sliding down to his broad shoulders.
The need to touch him—to be touched—was becoming an overwhelming ache. She wanted to slip his shirt over the smooth skin of his shoulders and bury her face in his warmth and strength.
His gaze intercepted hers and she knew that he’d read her thoughts. Her heart thumping, she tried to drag some air into her starving lungs, heat flooding her body as she saw the raw desire flare in his eyes.
Sharon’s voice broke the spell. ‘So are you still being sick, Tia?’
Tia blinked and dragged her gaze away from Luca’s, aware of Richard’s mild protest.
‘Darling, we’re eating,’ he pointed out, his tone amused as he looked at his wife. ‘And you never ask a pregnant person if they feel sick. It instantly makes them feel sick. You’re a midwife. You should know better.’
Sharon looked apologetic. ‘Sorry.’
Luca smiled. ‘Tia is coping very well with the sickness. She is being very brave about the whole thing…’ He paused slightly. ‘Especially considering how frightened she is about having this baby.’
Tia’s face lost its colour and her eyes flew to his. He’d guessed that she was frightened? How?
‘She told you?’ Sharon gave a smile of relief, oblivious to the tension simmering between her guests. ‘Thank goodness for that. I told her you’d understand but she was completely convinced that, being Italian, you wouldn’t want a woman who was scared of marriage and children. She has a serious commitment phobia does our Tia.’
Thank you, Sharon.
Tia closed her eyes and wished herself somewhere else. Now that Sharon had confirmed Luca’s suspicions, what was there that she could say?
The conversation moved on but Tia was aware only of Luca’s dark eyes resting on her from time to time and she knew that the subject was far from closed.
‘So what’s it like, practising medicine in the UK compared to Italy?’ Richard topped up the wineglasses and the conversation shifted to more general topics.
While Luca and Richard debated the merits of various health systems, Tia moved the food round her plate, trying to work out what to say when Luca confronted her in private.
They were finishing coffee when Luca’s bleeper sounded.
He pulled a face and went to use the phone, returning minutes later with an apologetic expression on his handsome face.
‘They are concerned about a twin delivery,’ he explained, reaching for his jacket and car keys. ‘I have to go, I’m afraid. Sharon, thank you for a lovely evening. Tia?’
Tia stood up without argument, seeing a means of escape. If she left now, she’d be in bed asleep by the time he arrived home. Which meant that they could postpone the conversation she was dreading.
Several hours later Tia heard the sound of Luca’s key in the door. She hadn’t slept. Not even for a minute. Her mind was too full of what had happened at Sharon’s.
And now Luca was home.
And ready to talk, no doubt.
Hearing his footsteps on the stairs she kept her eyes closed and tried to breathe steadily, knowing instinctively that he would come into her room.
The door opened and there was a long pause. Then she heard him walk across the room and the bed dipped a
s he sat down.
‘Your parents may have been actors, cara mia, but they didn’t pass on their talents to you,’ he drawled softly, stretching out a hand and flicking on her bedside lamp. ‘Has anyone ever told you that you are the master of avoidance?’
Tia burrowed deeper under the covers. ‘I’m not avoiding anything,’ she mumbled. ‘I’m just trying to sleep.’
‘Don’t lie to me, Tia. You have been wide awake all evening, worrying about this conversation,’ Luca said, his voice low and rough. ‘I saw the expression on your face at dinner. You were horrified that I’d guessed how you felt. Horrified that I have managed to uncover a little part of what you are feeling. You are constantly hiding from me, Tia. Especially about this pregnancy. I need you to be honest with me.’
But was he being honest with her?
She lay still for a minute, feeling a lump building in her throat. ‘All right.’ She sat up suddenly, her fingers clutching the duvet tightly against her as if she was using it as a barrier between her and him. ‘You want to know what I think of this pregnancy? Well, you’re right. I am frightened. Actually, I’m terrified. I swore I would never get married and have children and suddenly—’ She broke off, her breathing rapid, and wrapped her arms around her knees in a gesture of self-protection. ‘I don’t expect you to understand. I know that I’m nothing like any woman you’ve ever met before.’
‘Well, that’s certainly true.’ He stroked her face with a gentle hand. ‘But it’s not true to say that I don’t understand. I want to know exactly how you feel, Tia, and this time I don’t want you to hold anything back. You say that you never wanted to get married and have children. Presumably because of your own childhood, no?’
Tia stared at him with dull eyes. She might as well tell him at least part of the story.
‘As I told you the other night, my parents’ marriage was a disaster,’ she said flatly. ‘My father had one affair after another—he seemed unable to commit to one woman. And then when Mum died I was passed around a string of foster-homes.’