Just Pretending

by Leah Rooper

  I take a big bite of noodles. “Okay. Better get to the airport, then.”

  “I can’t!” Daniel cries. “Right now, my beloved, delicate, fragile mother—who so lovingly made the food you are scarfing down—is on a date with none other than Coach Zabinski.”

  Noodles fall from my open mouth to the plate. Hayden gives Daniel a sympathetic pat on the back. “Sorry to hear that, bud. We all knew it was coming after the way they were dancing at your royal ball last summer.”

  Daniel shivers. “So, you can clearly see why I have to follow them and make sure she’s not getting too up-close and personal with his mustache.” He aggressively motions for us to follow him to his bedroom.

  “You do realize how creepy that sounds, right?” I say.

  Hayden flops down on his bed. “So, what, you’re going to drag your princely charge around with you while you spy on your mom?”

  “Don’t be ridiculous,” Daniel scoffs. “Here, Tyler, put on this.” He grabs a garment bag out of his closet and throws it on the bed. Cautiously, I put my plate on his nightstand and open the zipper.

  “Oh God, it’s so shiny!” I’m temporarily blinded by a royal-blue uniform with golden lining and frilly shoulder pads. It has matching pants with swirls of gold down the leg.

  Hayden gives a mighty “Oof!” as Daniel tosses a pair of binoculars on his belly.

  “Tremblay and I are going to go spy on Ma,” he says. “Evans, you’re going to be the Official Eldonian delegate. Have fun!” He rushes to the door. “Come on, Tremblay, no time to lose!”

  “Uh, wait just a minute,” I say, zipping the garment bag closed and rubbing my eyes. “You want me to pick up this prince and show him around today? Not happening!”

  Daniel crosses his arms. “What have you got to do today?”

  “I…uh… have to watch Millie.”

  “No, you don’t,” Daniel snaps. “Today is your dad’s day off. Don’t even try to get cute with me, Evans.”

  I stand up and cross my arms. “If you think for a second I’m going to dress in that goofy getup and spend my afternoon with some random European princeling, you’re dreaming.”

  Daniel’s eyes dart to the clock, and he taps his foot anxiously. “I’ll pay you.”

  I suck in a breath as if I just got checked into the boards. “Dude. Don’t.”

  Both Daniel and Hayden know better than to offer me money. It’s not easy having one friend who’s the brother of an NHL player, and another who’s a goddamned prince. It’s even harder when you can tell they both pity you. It wasn’t that long ago that Daniel was just as broke as me. That was before Eva became Queen. He never wanted handouts from his kingly dad, but I guess being on his little sister’s payroll is a whole different thing. All I know is the trainer’s office where Madison works is always stocked with fresh flowers.

  I can feel Hayden’s gaze darting between us, and then Daniel takes a step toward me, eyes averted. “Sorry, man, I didn’t mean it like…” He looks up, his brown eyes wavering. “I’m just really desperate.”

  I stare at my best friend, at the urgency etched across his face. This is really important to him.

  I sigh. “Fine,” I say. “I’ll do it.”

  Daniel pumps his arm. “Yes, Evans MVP!”

  Hayden claps me on the back. “They don’t call you Mr. Nice Guy for nothing.”

  “Don’t forget your binoculars, James Bond.”

  Five minutes later, Daniel has put me into this ridiculous outfit, complete with a golden sash. “I look like I belong on the cover of one of Millie’s books,” I groan, staring aghast into the mirror.

  “You look like a million bucks.” Daniel smiles evilly. “Especially when I do this.” He squirts a massive pile of hair gel onto the top of my head and starts slicking back my blond curls.

  “Get off!” I say, but it’s too late. My hair is as solid as a helmet. I hear snickering behind me and turn, giving Hayden a glare that rivals Alice’s when she loses a puck. He immediately shuts up.

  “So, can I at least have a little background on what I’m doing?”

  “His name is Prince Tiberius,” Daniel says. “He’s the only child of the king and queen of Perienza. I only met him once, three years ago, when I accompanied my dad on a business trip there. He was a wild child, to say the least.”

  “Oh, great.”

  Daniel shrugs. “Maybe he’s mellowed out now.”

  “What am I even supposed to do with him?” I cry.

  “I don’t know,” Daniel says. “What about taking him to the Skydeck? Or a horse-drawn carriage ride through the park? The guy has traveled all over the world. Just let him take the lead and go with the flow in the most stylish outfit you’ve ever worn!”

  I pull on one of the dangling string things from my shoulders. “Where is Perienza? Shouldn’t I at least know that much if I’m supposed to be some Eldonian delegate?”

  “It’s a cluster of islands south of Greece. Here.” Daniel pulls out his phone and starts tapping. “This is what the prince looks like.” He holds out his phone, revealing a photo of a young man with a shockingly white smile, flowing dark hair, and bronzed skin. “And this is Perienza.” He holds up another picture, this one of turquoise water leading to white sandy beaches that trail up to rolling green hills.

  “Wow,” I say. “What’s important to know about it?”

  Daniel shrugs. “I don’t know. Tiberius and I were drunk the whole three days I was there. I don’t remember anything but my dad yelling at me and spending a lot of time on the bathroom floor.”

  “Dude!”

  He sighs. “Okay, Wikipedia says, ‘Perienza is a country in Southern Europe. It is an archipelago off the southernmost tip of the Balkan Peninsula. Perienza’s diverse natural scenery, warm climate, bountiful wineries, and abundance of ocean-front public beaches make it a popular destination for tourists, biologists, and gourmets.’” Daniel looks at me. “Good enough?”

  I nod.

  “Okay, Tiberius arrives at O’Hare in one hour, so you’ll have to catch your Uber quick.” He hands me a black credit card. “This is the crown’s card. Use it to pay for transportation and any entertainment tonight.”

  Hayden and I both stare at him. “C-Crown card?”

  “Eva gave it to me in case of emergencies! Don’t get weird about it!” He shakes his head. “The PIN is one three one three.” He looks off, adoringly. “Thirteen is Eva’s favorite number.”

  I snatch the card and turn back to the mirror. I look ridiculous—a street rat dressed up like royalty. “I can’t believe you’re making me do this.”

  “Come on, how bad will it be to pretend to be someone else for a day?”

  I stare at the stranger in the mirror. I guess it can’t be any worse than being Tyler Evans.

  Chapter Three

  Tyler

  My heart hammers in my chest, and I pull on the neckline of the ridiculous royal uniform I’m wearing. It’s so hot in this thing! I look around the airport and stare at the big Arrivals sign. The Prince should be walking out of those doors any minute.

  My palms are sweaty and slick on the stems of the bouquet I’m holding. I was a few minutes early to pick up Prince Tyrone, or whatever his name is, so I stopped at the gift shop. The official delegate of Eldonia would bring the prince a welcome present, wouldn’t they? A Wrigley Field ball cap seemed a little tacky, so I opted for flowers.

  I stare down into the wilting purple and yellow blooms. The colors swirl together, and I sway on my feet. What am I doing? It doesn’t matter that Daniel’s my best friend—I should never have let him talk me into this!

  There’s an old lady standing beside me, also holding a bouquet. I stare at her until she catches my eye, then I hold up my flowers, too, as if we’re toasting.

  “Nice flowers!” I say. “Who are you waiting for?”

  “My grandchildren,” she says, her voice raspy. “Their names are—”

  “Oh, that’s great!” I say. “Interesting
choice, huh? Flowers for kids? See, I’m picking up a prince. You know, like royalty.” I stare hard at the flowers again. “I bought him flowers. What do you think? Too much? Too little? These ones are kind of wilted. I just bought them from the gift shop—” I stare hard at her. Her bouquet is made up of beautiful pink lilies. “Wow, yours are way nicer.” I step closer, fixing her with a gaze so intense, it makes my eye twitch. “Want to trade?”

  She curls her lip and takes a few steps away.

  “Aw, come on! I have a credit ca—” Before I can barter my way to a better bouquet, I catch some rapid movement out of the corner of my eye.

  A young man floats out of Arrivals, his long brown hair blowing behind him as if he has his own personal wind machine. He’s dressed in a lime-green suit emblazoned with pink flowers. He’s wearing micro sunglasses with white rims that make him look like he just stepped out of a 90s movie. He’s pulling a matching lime-green suitcase.

  “Please don’t let that be—”

  “DANIEL!” the man cries, his voice heavily accented. He strides over to me. With his green suit and gangly limbs, he looks like a grasshopper.

  I stand stricken, my heart lurching painfully in my chest. A bead of sweat drips down my face, and the smell of hair gel is suffocating.

  The man stops in front of me and removes his micro glasses in one quick movement. “No, not Daniel.” He looks me up and down. “But in Daniel’s clothes. I thought Queen Evangeline would be picking me up today.”

  “Uh, I’m, uh, I’m the—” I wring the stems of the flowers in my hands. “I-I’m the official d-delegate from E-Eldonia. I-I’ll be showing you around t-today—”

  The Prince of Perienza stares at me intensely. I feel like I’m a mannequin on display and he’s deciding if the royal-blue of my uniform will match his neon closet. “Here!” I squeak and thrust out the bouquet of flowers.

  “For me?” he says. He snatches them from my hand, inhales deeply, then tosses them to the floor behind him. I stare at them dejectedly.

  “Here!” The Prince pushes the handle of his suitcase into my hands. “Be a good sir and take this to my room at the Grand Ritz.”

  “Wait, what—?”

  In one swift gesture, he grabs my face with his hands and plants a wet kiss on my forehead. “Thank you for your hospitality, my friend, but tell the Queen Dowager I do not need a babysitter!” He gives a twirl away from me, spreading his arms like a great green butterfly. “I’m off to enjoy the pleasures of the city! Aντίο!”

  I stand there dumbstruck, blinking my eyes and staring at the back of his green suit as he skips away. “W-Wait…”

  My heart quiets for a moment as I realize exactly what’s happened. I’ve lost the Prince of Perienza. “Wait!” I call again and dart forward. Several other planes must have just arrived, because suddenly, the foyer is filled with families embracing. “Wait!”

  I scoot through the crowd, searching the giant foyer. How can I lose someone wearing so much green? Oh, God. Daniel’s going to kill me when he finds out I screwed up the one thing he asked of me.

  I turn in circles. Which way could he have gone? To the cabs? Down the escalator?

  My eyes catch a glimpse of someone storming toward me through the crowd. I blink hard. Oh my God. I stumble backward.

  It’s Queen Evangeline.

  And she’s not alone. Her giant bodyguard, Dwayne Boulder, is following right behind her like a giant shadow.

  Oh God, oh God, oh God…. She knows I lost Prince Tiberius. She’s here to murder me. I’m literally going to be sent to the guillotine.

  Her face is focused, intense, and then as she stops within a few feet of me…she smiles.

  That smile lights her face up like a sunrise.

  “Welcome!” she says. “I’m so glad we found you!”

  “H-hey,” I say, amazed I can form words.

  “I’m Queen Evangeline.” She steps closer, her beautiful, full body as graceful as a swan’s. She’s introducing herself—of course she doesn’t remember me from Eldonia or even when she ran into me at the ice rink. “Apologies for our late arrival.”

  “It’s okay,” I say. “I thought you weren’t going to be here?”

  She taps her foot and crosses her arms. “Well, my darling brother Daniel, with whom you are acquainted, was so kind as to offer to be your escort.”

  “My escort?”

  She throws her hands up in the air. “Let’s just call it women’s intuition! I had a feeling Daniel wouldn’t show up! Please, I offer you our deepest apologies on behalf of the Eldonian Crown. Never send a prince to do a queen’s job!”

  “You don’t have to apologize to me.” I shrug. “I’ll just make Daniel buy me pizza.”

  “Don’t be silly.” She laughs daintily. Then she reaches out and touches my arm. “We’ll have dinner at the finest restaurant in Chicago tonight…Prince Tiberius.”

  I nearly burst out laughing. “You mean Ty—”

  “Oh, do you prefer Ty? I suppose Tiberius is a bit of a mouthful. Evangeline is the same.” She looks up at me with a small smile. “You may call me Eva.”

  “E-Eva…”

  She smiles sweetly. “It’s so nice to finally meet you, Prince Ty.”

  Oh, my sweet lord.

  This can’t be happening.

  She actually thinks I’m Prince Tiberius? Prince Tiberius of Perienza? The lime-green suit wearing, flower-throwing, forehead kissing, MIA Prince Tiberius?!

  Oh boy, is she going to be disappointed.

  “Your Highness—”

  “Eva!” she urges. She turns toward Dwayne and starts walking. “Here, let’s head to the car. We’ve got the sparkling apple juice chilled, just the way you like it. It’s so crowded here.”

  “Wait…I have to explain,” I say. Dwayne grabs the suitcase from me. I never thought I’d see something so strange as Dwayne Boulder pulling a tiny green suitcase.

  Evangeline turns to me, and with a single swish of her hair and the bat of her lashes, I feel like my heart has been pulled from my chest. My head feels heavy and light at the same time.

  She is so damn beautiful.

  “What is it, Ty?” she asks.

  Do I know how to speak? It seems like an impossible skill, topped only by moving, which also seems beyond my abilities right now. Somehow, I’m able to stutter, “D-Daniel—”

  Then her face changes, and suddenly I feel like I’m on the concrete floor of the arena again, listening to her berate me because I dared to comment on her drawings. Her eyebrows arch over her eyes, her mouth turns into a harsh scowl, and her shoulders hunch forward.

  “I know, I’m so sorry! I cannot believe he didn’t show up! I told him how important relations between our two countries are. But you know Daniel.” She shakes her head and then suddenly her face calms. She looks like the subject of a Renaissance painting. “At least you’re all right. If something happened to you,” she says, baring her teeth, “I would have to skin Daniel alive.”

  I suck in a breath. Oh my God. Daniel is going to get it when I tell Eva that I’m actually just her brother’s spineless friend and the real Prince Tiberius is out on the town, probably consorting with the worst of Chicago.

  And me? I stare at Eva’s sparkling face one more time. I want to soak it in before it turns feral again. Before, I was invisible to her. What will I be when I tell her I lost the Prince?

  I wonder if they have public executions in Eldonia?

  She wraps an arm through mine, and I stiffen. “What a lovely suit you have on! The men wear a similar style in Eldonia.” She looks up at me, and I can tell she finally sees me.

  But not me. She sees Prince Tiberius.

  “S-Sure,” I say. “Let’s go.”

  “You’re going to love Chicago!”

  I step with her, the weight of her hand on my arm grounding me to earth.

  I can’t rat out Daniel. Eva will chew the crap out of him, or worse, cut him from her payroll. And I can’t take having her look at
me like I’m scum again. Worse than scum. Like I’m nothing at all.

  For one night, I can be someone else. Then tomorrow, Eva will be free of her royal obligation to entertain Tiberius, Daniel will get off scot-free, and I’ll be done with this nightmare.

  I look down at Eva, as vibrant and sparkling as a sky full of fireworks.

  Okay, maybe tonight won’t be a nightmare.

  Maybe it will be a dream.

  …

  Eva

  “Where to next, Your Highness?” Dwayne asks as we walk out of the Museum of Science and Industry.

  “Well, I suppose we could go to the Skydeck,” I say. “You can see five states from up there. Or is it three?”

  Prince Tiberius gives a curt nod. “Okay, sounds good.”

  “How about coffee first?” I ask. “Do you drink coffee?”

  At this point, I don’t care if he drinks coffee or not, but I know I’m going to need it to get through the rest of this day. It’s not that I don’t like museums. But this is the eighth one I’ve been to this week. And Prince Tiberius may be adorably handsome, and blue is totally his color, but he’s barely spoken a single word. It’s like carting around one of the suits of armor from my castle.

  This is so not the day I had planned. A cloud of sadness hangs around me. I’d been really looking forward to spending the day with Alice and Madison, to feeling like a part of their group. But of course, my queenly duties had to get in the way again. Alice and Madison were so nice when I canceled on them, promising we’d reschedule. But I know it’s not going happen, considering Madison’s crazy schedule and all of Alice’s hockey practices.

  When I left Daniel in charge, I wanted to forget about Eldonia and just be plain old Eva. But all I could hear was that voice screaming in my head: your country needs you.

  Even though the rational part of me knows ditching Tiberius—or relying on my flaky older brother—wouldn’t send Eldonia into a downward spiral of horrors, I can’t help but feel like this was something I had to do. If there’s an issue regarding Eldonia, I have to fix it.

  So here I am. With the Prince of Perienza.

  He’s definitely not what I expected. I look over to him, pulling a gold thread on his sleeve. This is the prince who stayed out all night partying with my wild brother? This is the prince who streaked naked down the town square to protest the import of furs into Perienza? This is the prince who named a national holiday after his pet chameleon?