Finding Eden

by Dinsdale, Megan

  I realized that I needed to get out before I started doing crazy things, like purposely making myself bleed just to have something different to do. I remembered the gas station/convenience store that was only a few miles back and vaguely remembered seeing a Texaco sign standing tall above the building. I wondered if it was still there or if it had been completely demolished by the asteroids that had rained down without mercy years ago. At least that was what I assumed when I had come out of hiding to see all the plant life turned to ash and hundreds of craters scarring the now deadened earth. I was sure that if there were any snacks left over that they’d all be expired. But don’t Twinkies last forever? Maybe there would be some there. I would have settled for some stale barbecue chips. With my luck, some survivors had come through this area and completely cleaned it out. But as I glanced at the bare shelves, I reminded myself that I didn't have anything else to do or much of a choice either.

  I had been too frightened to ever attempt it before, but I had never been quite this desperate.

  “Might as well,” I breathed.

  It had been night for nearly two hours, so the time was probably around midnight, meaning I only had about four or five hours of darkness left. I’d have plenty of time to make it there and back before the threat of frying would rear its ugly head. The impending promise of starvation had finally pushed me to this point.

  I grabbed my bag. It was empty; I'd never had much use for it. I wondered if it was lonely like I was only to decide that I had never had such an odd thought. Along with the rest of the batteries, I filled two water bottles up and stuck them in my bag. I needed room for any loot that I would hopefully come upon. I stuck my Bowie knife into the sheath connected to my belt. It lay flat against my right hip; the flashlight was attached to my left.

  I tightened the laces on my knee-high leather boots, pulled my socks up to my thighs, and slid on my white tank top that fell just above my belt and corduroy shorts. Tightening the straps of my backpack, I realized I had lost a lot of weight since I'd last used it. Ignoring this fact, I made my way up the ladder and opened the circular hatch, all the while wishing I felt a breeze, but I only felt a rush of dry heat that enveloped me in its deadly embrace.

  Chapter 2

  [ Elle ]

  I closed the hatch and locked it. A large pumice stone was attached to the hatch and it played its part perfectly, camouflaging the entrance. Someone could pass right by the bunker and never even know it was there.

  Everything was still. I remembered coming to this place before it all went down. It had been windy then. At night I could hear the coyotes yelping and the brush rustle as the breeze danced around it. Now it was deader than a ghost town and hotter than hell itself. The moon was bright in the sky and dampened every star light. A big, glowing moon used to symbolize beauty and wonder; now it only reminded me of what it was reflecting and what the sky would bring in the morning. It really was a pity. I used to lay on the roof of my former home in the evening with friends and stargaze until we lost all track of time.

  The desert was flat for miles and completely desolate. The plant life had long burned away, taking the wildlife with it. Sand and rocks seemed to stretch on forever, until it all just disappeared into the darkness. I silently prayed for a breeze that would never come.

  Within seconds, I could feel myself beginning to sweat—the beads already forming on my forehead and the back of my neck. The blonde strands that escaped my braid stuck to my naked skin. I felt parched as I breathed in the dead air and immediately ignored it, pushing it to the deep recesses of my mind. No matter what, I had to conserve the water. It was my one and only mantra.

  To reach my destination, all I had to do was head to the main road and follow it until it exited towards the gas station. It wouldn’t take long, but I knew I had to take my time; I would dehydrate quickly if I used excessive energy. The road was to the right of the bunker, so I headed in that direction, the light emanating from the flashlight leading the way. Within minutes, I was slick with sweat. My top was stuck to my body like glue and I had to constantly keep the sweat from dripping into my eyes. Like an idiot, I had forgotten my bandana.

  When I reached the main road, I looked both ways. It was a good habit to have, though an old habit, but now it was just redundant; I laughed at myself. The sound was almost hysterical, like I was tiptoeing on the edge of sanity. I was beginning to scare myself.

  I stopped in the center of the road. The asphalt felt soft beneath my feet as if it had just been laid down and hadn’t solidified yet. The smell was heady and it declared war on my nostrils. My nose wrinkled in response. I turned left and walked down the middle of the road. It felt strange, kind of like I was breaking the law. Wandering down the middle of a main highway was not the definition of intelligence or safety, but it no longer mattered. I almost felt like a rebel doing it. It felt exhilarating, or maybe I was just getting high off of asphalt fumes.

  Time seemed to drag on and paranoia began to set in. I felt it develop in the pit of my barren stomach. I had no idea how much time had gone by since I had left. What if it had been a couple hours? Would I make it back in time? My mind filled with worries. There would be absolutely nowhere to hide from the sun once it arrived. The only place for miles upon miles was the bunker. My current depression melted into fear. I had been so bent on the idea of finally meeting my end and not having to fight for survival, but now with the threat of my imminent frying, it didn’t sound so desirable anymore. In fact, it was downright petrifying. I picked up my pace. All of my senses seemed heightened. I couldn’t see the exit yet, and even though I knew I was getting closer, I still felt as if it was getting away from me—like the road was stretching on for thousands of miles and no matter how far I walked, I would never reach it.

  Crack!

  I whipped around at the noise. The damp hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. Someone or something was following me; I knew it. I turned back around and continued on my way. My hand hovered above the handle of my knife. I would play coy. My enemy would never suspect it. I shrugged, like I had imagined the whole thing, playing my part perfectly. My façade would be foolproof; it would be perfect.

  A soft breeze hit the back of my neck, and it felt so foreign. I could hear heavy breathing, almost panting. My enemy was behind me. Quickly, I grabbed my knife, swung around, and jabbed at…the air. No one was there. I was alone—completely and utterly alone. I half expected a tumbleweed to blow across the road in a comical fashion.

  That’s when I realized I was hallucinating. I tore the backpack from my shoulders and pulled out a water bottle and downed half of it.

  “Shit,” I hissed. I needed to pay more attention, not to mention I was quickly losing grip of my sanity. I reminded myself that I was the only one here. Maybe I was the only one left in the entirety of California. It wouldn’t have surprised me in the least.

  By the time I reached the exit, I was down to one water bottle and I felt as if it was already in the form of sweat on my skin. I could vaguely see the outline of the gas station under the moonlight. For the most part, it seemed to be still upright.

  I was tempted to open my other water bottle, but I stopped myself and repeated the mantra in my head over and over again. I quickly forgot about my thirst as I reached the gas station. Thankfully, it was indeed still standing, but it looked ancient, like it had been abandoned for a hundred years. The earthquakes, from what I could tell, must not have completely affected it. The wood looked sun-bleached and the huge Texaco sign was lopsided above the entrance. The colors were faded and the whole building looked like it would fall to ground if the earth even jolted a little.

  I took a deep breath and pushed at the door with my foot. It didn’t budge. I found a large rock nearby and threw it at the door; it immediately shattered. The sound was foreign and frightened me. I wasn’t used to loud noises.

  I was hesitant at first, but I shook off the foreboding feel of the situation and stepped through the demolished entrance. I
shined my flashlight around the tiny store and everything was as it should have been. Some things were knocked over, probably from tremors, but no looters had made it this far; it was as expected. I made a beeline to the candy aisle. I grabbed a chocolate bar and watched as it flattened in my hand. The sweet confection inside was completely liquefied. I put it back. It was a stupid idea anyway; I shouldn’t waste any pack space on something as trivial as candy, so I grabbed a few packs of gum and some hard, butterscotch-flavored candy. I could die tomorrow, I decided. I might as well live it up for the time being.

  I could feel my glands convulse as I set my eyes on the chip rack. I swallowed as I found my barbecue chips. I was tempted to sit down and eat an entire bag there, but I knew it would only waste time; the salt content would result in a stronger thirst for water. I stuffed a few snack-sized bags in my pack, along with some sour cream and onion flavored ones. Unable to stop myself, I threw in a couple small bags of cookies, which I was sure were horribly stale. I couldn’t forget the Twinkies either. I walked over to the refrigerated section, which obviously didn’t work, so I didn’t bother taking anything but a few water bottles. I’d come back for the rest another day. What little space I had left in my bag, I stuffed with toothpaste, first aid items, tampons, and other much needed miscellaneous items.

  Without warning, the light on my flashlight flickered a few times before dying altogether. As I cursed and reached for a spare battery, I saw a shadow pass by a window on the other side of the store. I quickly put the flashlight into its holder on my belt as I crouched down between the candy and first aid shelves. This time I knew for a fact that I wasn’t hallucinating. I could hear the footsteps and the crunch as the person stepped on the broken shards of glass. They were heavy footfalls. I immediately assumed it was a man and I placed myself on guard. I slid my knife out by its handle and tightly wrapped my fingers around it, fully gripping it. In deep concentration, I bit down on my bottom lip. I heard something unzip. He was filling his own pack with supplies. I knew if I just kept quiet and hidden, he would just go about his business and leave; there wouldn't have to be trouble.

  I heard him grow closer. I was discrete as I moved around the end of the aisle. My breathing was steady, silent. I crouched behind the checkout counter thinking I was completely safe, when arms came from behind me, pulling me into a headlock. I gasped.

  I pulled and pushed at the arms, but they didn’t move an inch. Whoever it was they had an immense amount of strength. Remembering I had my knife, I brought it up and sliced at his forearm. He growled an oath and backed away. I backed away too, in a crouched stance, ready to attack if he advanced at me again.

  “Oh, fuck. You’re a girl,” was all he said, and before I knew what I was doing, I was the one advancing at him. I sprinted forward and sprung up at him, successfully knocking him onto his back. My knees pinned his arms to his sides and I had my knife at his throat. Droplets of blood slid down his neck.

  I allowed myself to look into his eyes. They were brown, but that was neither here nor there. What did interest me was the amused look in them. And then his lips twitched into an arrogant smirk. My eyes widened infinitesimally then narrowed.

  “Don’t. Move.” I hissed, watching more blood well up around my blade.

  My attacker did the complete opposite. Only humoring me by allowing me to hold him down, he flipped me over like I weighed absolutely nothing. Now I was on my back, watching my knife slide across the linoleum tile just out of arms reach. Before I could make a run for it, he was on top of me and his hands were gripping my wrists; his knee was pressed into my windpipe.

  I coughed and sputtered as I kicked my legs, trying to get out from under him, but every time I moved, his knee sunk deeper into my neck.

  “About done there?” He was still amused.

  I tried to speak, but nothing came out. I knew there was no point wasting energy fighting this man; nothing would come of it. Even if I had the will to go on, I was still only five-foot-one with barely any muscle tone. I went limp underneath him.

  “There we go,” he spoke again. “Now, if I let you go, you have to agree not to lunge at me again. I won’t hurt you; I promise.” His words tried to reassure me, but I was still on edge, not even close to putting any trust in him.

  He lifted his knee and I nodded, not sure if I could speak. My neck would be bruised later.

  “I’m trusting you,” he warned.

  “I’m trusting you,” I lied.

  He was on his feet and took several steps back, reaching for something behind him, but he never grabbed it. I had a feeling it was his insurance policy.

  I grabbed my knife; he flinched, so I placed it securely back in its sheath. My hands were up in the air, showing him I was no longer a threat. He nodded and rested his arms at his sides.

  “Damn,” I cursed, my voice hoarse. “How long until sunrise?” I had completely forgotten the situation at hand, momentarily stunned by how long we had been at battle.

  I saw fear flash across his face. He stuck his head outside and I realized he was checking the position of the moon.

  He grimaced. “I’d say a couple hours.”

  A string of words escaped my lips, both vulgar and surprising to me. I looked up at the man; I couldn’t tell if he was going to laugh at me or do the same thing. He pulled out a wide piece of paper and scanned it urgently. He ran his hand over his head, obviously incredibly stressed.

  “My next stop isn’t for almost eight miles.”

  I was exasperated and I couldn’t believe I was doing this. I walked across the store, grabbed two more water bottles and handed him one. I may not have trusted the man, but I wasn’t going to let the only human I’d seen in more than four years die. I would have felt exceedingly at fault and insanely guilty.

  “Let’s go,” I grumbled to him as I headed towards the door. I felt around my body, making sure I had everything I came in with and that it was all secure. I could already tell that the temperature had risen a degree or two. I turned around; the man was just standing there with a surprised look on his face. “Are you coming or not? If you want to fry, by all means, be my guest. But I’m going back. Now.”

  I heard him move behind me, but I didn’t look back. I wasn’t afraid of him attacking me; I knew I was his only chance at survival. I held all the power and it felt good; I basked in its light. The arrogant prick was probably suffering at the thought. I held my laughter in.

  An hour later I had already finished off the water bottle I had grabbed and I had to pee. I told him to wait where he was as I found a boulder to go behind. It resembled a meteorite. He looked entertained.

  “It was either now or when the sun goes down. No human can wait that long.” I paused. “Wipe that look off your face.” I was bright red and indignant.

  We finally reached the turn off to my bunker. We were both slick with sweat, parched, and panting. The sky became ominous as it started to lighten. The air was getting hotter by the minute. We looked at each other; I saw the panic in his eyes and I was sure he saw it reflected in my own.

  “Sprint,” I commanded and we were both on our feet, running completely off of adrenaline. I assumed he could run faster than me and I felt guilty because he had to follow behind. If we were too late, it would be my fault. My lungs were burning, pleading for me to give them a rest. A deep, unrelenting pain stung my sides and within minutes my legs would no longer move. They were jelly beneath me. I saw the sun’s rays grabbing the edge of the desert mountains, teasing me—tormenting me.

  Without warning, my knees gave out.

  I didn’t think about what I was about to say; I knew it was the right decision. “Go ahead without me,” I said. “If you keep going straight for another half mile, you’ll see a boulder made of pumice. Lift it. Here—take my key. Lift the boulder up; you’ll see a hatch.” I took a deep, torturous breath. My lungs felt bruised and used up. “I’ll catch up,” I lied. I had no clue why, but I needed one of us to survive and I had a feeling it wasn�
�t going to be me.

  I was surprised when he didn’t even hesitate in his decision not to go ahead without me. He didn’t even look in the direction of the bunker. He just scooped me up and threw me over his shoulder. His grip was tight over my legs and he was off and running towards our survival. I felt my backpack begin to slip over my shoulders, so I held it tightly against me. I was going to protest his decision, but I didn’t have any energy left in me to do so. I knew we only had minutes, but I must have blacked out for a moment; when I came to, we were at the bunker and he was asking for my key. He put me down and I unlocked the hatch then opened it. Right before I climbed inside, I saw the sun rise above the mountains. It looked angry at me for escaping it all these years. I felt that it wanted my life and it knew I was finally within its grasp. My skin began to burn so quickly that I stepped into the bunker, not even using the ladder. I dropped to the ground, feeling bruised, beaten, burned. He jumped in after me and closed the hatch.

  I grabbed Teffy from my bed and held him firmly against my chest.

  Chapter 3

  [ Unknown ]

  This crazy girl was something else. Looking at her, I would have never thought that she would have been so bold and show such strength back at the gas station. Of course, I hadn’t realized she was a girl at first either. It was too dark. She looked to be barely over five feet, so I should have made the assumption. I blamed it on the complete surprise of seeing another living human. It was probably sexist of me to automatically think a woman couldn’t survive on her own out here, much less one the size of a child.