Pontypridd 07 - Spoils of War

by Catrin Collier

  ‘Her head is a bit fuzzy, like yours when you wake up first thing in the morning and she’s forgotten some things, so we’ll have to remind her about them. And while she was sleeping she couldn’t eat, so she lost some weight. But we can fatten her up by giving her lots of biscuits and slices of Granny’s cake.’

  ‘Will there still be enough for me?’

  ‘I should think so, Billy,’ Ronnie smiled. ‘How would you like a game of tiddlywinks until Mam has settled in enough to see us?’

  ‘Catrina doesn’t play it properly.’

  ‘And she isn’t going to learn if we don’t teach her to play it with us.’ Ronnie opened the box and tipped the counters out. ‘What colour do you want?’

  ‘Red.’ Catrina grabbed the large red bone disc and eight smaller ones while Ronnie set the pot and cardboard scoreboard on the lino at the edge of the rug.

  ‘Can I have blue, Dad?’ Billy asked.

  Ronnie nodded absently, not even thinking about the game. Like Billy, he had noticed that Diana had lost weight. The only time he had seen her in two and a half years were the few minutes on the night of his arrival, and although she had been wrapped in her dressing gown he was sure she hadn’t looked quite so thin and gaunt then. The navy serge suit she was wearing – one he remembered – had hung loose on her slight frame, the white blouse under the jacket positively baggy at the collar. He felt a tug at his hand and looked down. Catrina handed him the die and Bakelite shaker cup.

  ‘Play!’

  ‘Of course, darling.’ He stretched out on the rug between the children. ‘It’s a real treat to have a fire in here, isn’t it?’ he enthused in an effort to convince them that the unusual activity in the house was all for their benefit. Catrina tipped the die out on the lino.

  ‘You’re supposed to shake it, Cat,’ Billy reprimanded crossly.

  Ronnie slipped the die back into the cup. ‘Try again, sunshine.’

  Jumping to his feet, Billy shouted, ‘I don’t want to play, I want to see Mam.’

  ‘Ssh, keep your voice down. You will see her, Billy, I promise, and in a very few minutes.’ Ronnie pulled him back on to the rug. ‘But she’s been very ill and needs to rest after her journey here.’

  ‘And she doesn’t want to see me and Catrina because she’s resting?’

  ‘Of course she’ll want to see you.’ Rolling on his back, Ronnie lifted him high in his arms. ‘And when Granny comes to get you, you can give Mam the flowers we bought on the market and Catrina can give her the bar of chocolate.’

  ‘Granny’s never coming.’

  ‘Roll the die, start playing and I bet you …’ Ronnie pulled the change from his pocket and laid two silver threepences on the tiled hearth. ‘Those two joeys that Granny will come to get you before the game is over.’

  ‘I’m not an invalid, Mam.’

  ‘Yes, you are, and you’ll do as you’re told.’ Megan bustled Diana into one of the easy chairs placed next to the range. Pulling a blanket from beneath a cushion on the sofa she unfolded it and tucked it around her daughter’s legs.

  ‘Now I’m going to roast.’

  ‘Quiet, or I’ll set Andrew on you.’

  ‘Great, now I’m the bogeyman.’ Andrew carried Diana’s case in, and left it by the door.

  ‘If you don’t do as you’re told, he’ll have you straight back in hospital.’

  ‘All you’ve succeeded in doing is swapping one dragon witch sister for another, Di,’ Bethan cautioned.

  ‘Tea’s ready when you are,’ Tina called from the wash house.

  ‘Come and meet the invalid before you lay it,’ Bethan suggested.

  ‘I thought we weren’t supposed to overwhelm her all at once.’ Picking up a towel, Tina dried her hands on it before joining the others. Megan was hovering anxiously over Diana, Andrew had sat next to Bethan on the sofa but William and Dino were standing at the door like sentinels.

  ‘Hello, Di.’ She bent to kiss her. ‘Nice to see you up and about and looking so well. Boy, your hair looks great.’

  ‘One of the nurses cut and shaped it for me.’

  ‘Any chance of her coming to the house to do mine?’ She looked across at William and Dino. ‘You two standing guard, or what?’

  Diana looked at them and laughed. ‘Little and large.’

  ‘Who’s the large?’ Megan asked.

  ‘That depends on whether you’re looking sideways or head on,’ Tina teased.

  ‘You’re my stepfather?’

  ‘You recognise me, Diana?’ Dino asked hopefully.

  ‘From a photograph Bethan gave me of you and Mam that had been taken on your wedding day. Apparently I was there but I don’t remember a thing about it. You’re even wider than Mam said and I thought you would be.’

  ‘Diana! I said no such thing,’ Megan exclaimed.

  ‘It’s all right, I grew a skin like a rhinoceros when I married into this family,’ Dino grinned, ‘but only because I had to.’

  ‘I think I’m going to like you, Dino. Did I before?’

  ‘Glad to see you’ve lost none of your tact and diplomacy along with your memory, sis.’ William perched on the other chair and looked up at Tina. ‘Tea, woman.’

  ‘No ordering me about to show off in front of Diana or I’ll hit you.’

  ‘See how cruelly she treats me? She needs you to set a good wifely example …’ He stooped to rub his ankle where Andrew had kicked him.

  ‘Where are the children?’ Diana asked.

  ‘In the parlour. We lit the fire so they could play in there.’

  ‘That’s my fault, not Megan’s,’ Andrew explained. ‘I thought you shouldn’t be bombarded with too many people at once.’

  ‘And I’d like this to be a normal day and a normal family teatime. You should have invited Uncle Evan and Phyllis …’

  ‘And all my brothers and sisters.’ Tina carried an enormous oval meat plate piled high with Welsh cakes into the kitchen and set it in the middle of the table, ‘including my mother and Gina, who’s just had a baby.’

  ‘Boy or girl?’

  ‘Girl. Sorry, Andrew,’ she apologised as he shook his head at her. ‘I didn’t think.’

  ‘But I remember Gina marrying Luke,’ Diana protested. Tired of the strained atmosphere that was the result of everyone trying too hard, she looked from Andrew to her mother. ‘I want to see the children.’

  ‘Andrew?’ Megan asked.

  ‘I want to see them, not him.’ Reaching for her crutches, she heaved herself to her feet.

  ‘I’ll go and check the fire in the parlour.’

  ‘There’s no need, Beth. It will be fine.’

  ‘How do you know?’

  ‘Because there’s no way you lot would leave a five-year old and a two-year-old alone in a room with a fire. I know their father’s with them and I think it’s time I made his acquaintance.’

  ‘Peter, what on earth are you doing here?’ Liza stared in amazement as she walked into the lobby of the nurses’ home and saw Peter standing in the foyer.

  ‘I’m here because they told me I couldn’t wait anywhere else.’

  ‘But how did you find me?’

  ‘You told me you worked in Cardiff Royal Infirmary. Today’s my half-day in the garage, I caught a bus into Cardiff found it, and asked for you.’

  ‘Someone in the Infirmary told you I was here?’ She pulled her nurse’s cloak closer to her body, holding the edges together with her fingers. She’d been fast asleep after her night shift when one of the other trainees had woken her with the news that there was a young man waiting to see her. She’d thrown on a few clothes and run down expecting to see Angelo, but Peter’s white-blond head shining like a beacon in the tiled gloom of the hostel foyer had taken her breath away.

  ‘You’re angry with me.’

  ‘Just surprised.’

  ‘I wanted to see you.’

  ‘I’m on night shift for the next three days.’

  ‘The nurse I spoke to told me.’


  ‘But I have next Thursday off.’ Try as she may she simply couldn’t stop looking into his eyes. Blue – deep blue – so unlike Angelo’s dark brown ones.

  ‘I have to work in the day, but I could meet you here in the evening, or if you come to Pontypridd I could see you there.’

  ‘I’m going home to see my sisters.’

  ‘Then we’ll go out on Thursday night.’ She suddenly realised he hadn’t asked but told her. ‘Do you have some free time now?’

  She looked at her watch. ‘A couple of hours. I intended to spend them sleeping.’

  ‘But you’re awake now. I could take you …’

  ‘For a coffee, a walk, or to the pictures.’ She expected him to accuse her of making fun of him but he smiled.

  ‘Any or all of those things.’

  ‘Give me a quarter of an hour to get ready.’

  ‘You are ready.’

  ‘Not if you look at what I’m wearing under this cloak.’

  ‘I could help you dress.’

  ‘Say that within earshot of the warden of this hostel and you’ll never have any children. Fifteen minutes, no more, I promise.’ She ran back up the stairs.

  ‘Liza, he’s gorgeous.’

  ‘Where have you been hiding him?’

  ‘Who is he?’

  ‘He looks Scandinavian.’

  ‘I thought you were going out with that Italian boy.’

  ‘I am,’ Liza mumbled, remembering that she still hadn’t had time to tell Angelo of her change of heart, and he deserved to hear about it before a crowd of her fellow trainees.

  ‘Does he know about this one?’

  ‘Peter’s a friend of the family.’

  ‘I wish my family had friends who looked like him.’

  ‘He’s only sixteen.’

  ‘Now we know you’re lying. If you get fed up of him you know where to send him.’

  As Liza finally managed to push her way back up the stairs, she stole another glance at Peter in the foyer and knew with absolute certainty that she didn’t want to send him anywhere – especially away from her.

  The door to the parlour opened and Megan beckoned to Billy and Catrina. ‘Better get the flowers and chocolate, she’s coming.’

  Billy rushed to the table to pick up the bunch of daffodils and tulips he had helped Ronnie pick out earlier that morning, while Ronnie handed Catrina the chocolate that had used up his month’s sweet rations.

  Diana hobbled round the corner.

  ‘Sit down before you try to hug them,’ Megan advised.

  Diana almost fell into the nearest chair and opened her arms. Billy stood still for a moment then, clutching the flowers, he hurtled at top speed on to her lap throwing his arms round her neck.

  ‘Steady now, Billy. Remember Mam has been very ill.’ Megan brushed a tear from the corner of her eye.

  ‘But I’m fine now.’ Sitting back, Diana held her son away from her with both hands and looked at him. ‘You’ve grown into a fine boy.’

  ‘You home for good, Mam?’

  ‘I hope so, darling. If it was up to me I would be but I still have to do what the doctors say.’ She looked across the room to see Ronnie struggling to hold Catrina, who was fighting to climb off his lap.

  ‘She knows her mother,’ he said quietly.

  ‘Here, Billy, shift over.’ Diana made room on her lap and Ronnie lifted Catrina gently on to her. ‘Chocolate, flowers, for me?’ She kissed both of them. ‘Thank you so very much. Now I want you to tell me everything that you’ve been doing since I’ve been away.’

  Ronnie moved closer to Megan as the children began babbling.

  ‘Do you think she remembers?’ he whispered, hoping, although he already knew the answer to his question.

  ‘Well prepared. She’s been pumping Bethan all morning,’ Megan muttered under her breath.

  ‘Me and Daddy saw you coming.’

  ‘Did you, darling?’ Diana kissed Billy’s cheek.

  ‘And we bought you flowers. I chose them.’

  ‘They’re lovely.’

  ‘And chocolate.’

  ‘You’re spoiling me.’ She handed Megan her presents. ‘Don’t you think it’s time I saw this mystery Daddy?’

  ‘Perhaps when the children go into the kitchen for tea.’ Megan looked away, unable to meet Ronnie’s eyes.

  ‘Daddy’s no mystery,’ Billy giggled.

  ‘Billy, why don’t you take Catrina into the kitchen and see if Auntie Tina’s set out those iced biscuits we made this morning? If she has, pick out the two nicest and put them on a plate for Mam,’ Megan suggested.

  ‘Mam …’

  ‘I’m not going away just yet, Billy.’ Diana allowed Megan to lift the children from her lap.

  ‘They’re quite a handful,’ she said, as Ronnie closed the door behind Megan, before sitting in the chair opposite hers.

  ‘Most children are.’

  ‘Tina said something about having a party and inviting all her brothers and sisters; I had no idea she was serious.’

  ‘How are you feeling?’

  ‘Fed up with no one telling me anything. Overwhelmed at seeing two grown children, one I can’t even remember. Annoyed at missing four years.’ She looked at him, saw the way he was looking at her. ‘I married you!’

  ‘I wish that hadn’t sounded as though you were quite so shocked – or sorry.’

  ‘I don’t remember enough to be sorry. This is awful, like walking through a thick fog and not knowing who you’re going to meet when it lifts enough to see your hand in front of your face.’

  ‘How about we sit here quietly in front of the fire and I tell you everything so you don’t have to remember.’

  ‘You’d do that? The doctors –’

  ‘Have admitted they haven’t a clue what to do with you.’ Leaving his chair he kneeled on the hearthrug in front of her. Lifting back her hair, he ran his fingers lightly over the scar on her temple. ‘That must hurt.’

  ‘Not any more, although I sometimes get headaches. God, this is strange!’

  ‘Let’s see if we can make it any the less strange. Where do you want me to start?’

  ‘It still has to be uniform, I’m afraid. I might not have time to change later.’

  ‘Your hair looks tidier.’

  ‘You’re lucky I had time to comb it. You can’t just turn up at the nurses’ hostel like this, Peter. I could have been working, I could have been studying – and you can’t take my arm.’ She moved away from him as one of the staff nurses walked into the foyer. ‘I’m in uniform and shouldn’t even be with a boy.’

  ‘But you were sleeping?’ He followed her as she left the building.

  ‘I was.’

  ‘If you had been busy or I hadn’t found you I would have got back on the bus and gone home.’

  ‘Won’t your mother and father be worried about you?’

  ‘I am not a child.’

  ‘I’m beginning to realise that.’

  ‘What is this place?’

  ‘A teashop.’ She opened the door and looked around. There were half a dozen empty tables and she chose one by the window.

  ‘Nurses come to drink tea here when they don’t have to work?’

  ‘And eat,’ she said earnestly. ‘The food in the hostel is very bad.’

  ‘I have some money, what can I buy you?’

  ‘You want to save all your money. I can buy my own food and drink.’

  ‘I think,’ he rested his head on his hands and looked at her, ‘that very soon your money and my money will be the same.’

  ‘What would you like, sir, miss?’ The waitress pulled a notepad from her belt.

  ‘I’d like whatever is good, two of everything.’

  ‘Sir?’

  ‘Never mind him, he’s in a funny mood.’ Liza looked at the counter behind the girl. ‘Two hot chocolates, and are those fresh Chelseas?’

  ‘Made this morning.’

  ‘And two of those please.’

  Ronnie sat b
ack in his chair. ‘Have I said too much for you to take in?’

  ‘I think I’ve followed you.’

  ‘You have to bear in mind that I’ve only given the sketchiest outline of what your life has been like for the last two and a half years because I wasn’t here and I only have your letters and other people’s accounts to go on.’

  ‘I still can’t believe I married you. Of all the men in Pontypridd – you!’ She continued to sit staring at him with the same expression of blank incomprehension on her face that had set in when she had realised why he’d stayed in the room after the children had left.

  ‘Any reason in particular why you can’t believe it?’

  ‘You are so much older than me. You were always shouting and grumpy when you ran the café when I was growing up …’

  ‘You made the same objections when I first suggested we get married.’

  ‘I did?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘And you were married to Maud. I remember your wedding.’

  ‘You married Wyn.’

  ‘I know they’ve both died. Bethan told me. I wish they hadn’t.’

  ‘We both did a lot of grieving at the time.’

  ‘This is so peculiar.’

  ‘The first thing I have to do is convince you how much I’ve changed from the Ronnie you remember, but it’s not my shouting and moods you’re thinking about, is it?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘You’re trying to imagine making love to me and you can’t, because you married Wyn in the hope that you’d never have to sleep with another man again.’

  ‘How did you know that?’

  ‘Because we’ve never kept secrets from one another. Because I’m your husband and because I’ve made it my business to know your every mood and thoughts. We were together for over a year before I had to leave and I used that time to study you. I was a very attentive student.’

  ‘I remember asking Maud once if she was afraid of you.’

  ‘And what did she say?’

  ‘Not after she got to know you.’

  ‘We have all the time in the world to get to know one another again, Diana.’

  ‘What if I never remember that you’re my husband?’

  ‘We’ll have to make a whole lot of new memories for you to think about.’

  ‘It doesn’t worry you?’

  ‘The only thing that concerns me at the moment is how I’m going to keep you out of the clutches of the doctors and that hospital. Do you want to go back?’