The Riding Master

by Alexandrea Weis

  “But how did Selene know I was going with Trent to that party?”

  He leaned back against the bar. “I don’t know. Maybe she talked to Monique Delome. You know what a pathological little social climber she is.”

  “Yeah, I know.” Rayne’s mind filled with questions as she stared at her ex-husband’s surly countenance. “So Selene planned the whole thing?”

  “Looks that way.” He bobbed his head in agreement. “But after seeing the way you were with Trent at the party, it was obvious you two were pretty serious.”

  “Why did you think that?”

  “You looked happy, Rayne. Real happy.”

  Images from the night of the party came back to her, and that warm feeling of contentment Trent had always evoked blanketed her weary body.

  “So when Estelle told me you two had split up, I was kind of surprised, but also relieved.” He crept closer to Rayne’s side. “I’m not asking for you to move back in right away. I was hoping we could start seeing each other again; dinner, a few parties; maybe even go on a trip together…wherever you want. I’ll do whatever makes you comfortable.”

  “Comfortable?” She retrieved her carton of orange juice from the counter. “But not happy.”

  “Happiness will come, Rayne. We have plenty of time to find happiness.”

  Rayne walked back to her refrigerator and replaced the orange juice on the shelf. “I’m sorry, Foster, but I can’t go backwards. I’m not the same woman you married.” She slowly faced him. “I’m different, a lot different, and I want so much more.”

  He cast his eyes to the floor. “Perhaps you need some time to—”

  “All the time in the world won’t change my mind,” she broke in.

  When his blue eyes rose to her, the same cool, contentious look she had always associated with his dismissive nature stared back at her. Even on their wedding day, he had appeared as aloof, as disconnected from his emotions as he did at that moment.

  “All right.” With an air of indifference, he shoved his hands into his trousers pockets. “But I want you to know I’m always here for you, and for Estelle. She is going to need help down the road, and I want to be there for both of you.”

  “I appreciate that, Foster.”

  She showed him to the door, and after he had left, Rayne settled back against the wall in her hallway. Ever since the divorce, she had dreamed of Foster coming back to her and making amends. Now that dream had come true, but she felt not an ounce of satisfaction. He was not the man she wanted…Trent was.

  That certainty almost knocked her to the ground. “No, that can’t be. He’s going to turn into another Foster. He doesn’t care about me…he can’t….” But as a montage of her time with Trent skipped across her heart, her resistance faded.

  Her mother, Rebecca, even Lindsey had been right. Trent was not Foster, and the emotion she had shared with him had never compared to the emptiness she experienced with her ex. Maybe all she had needed was to put her life with Foster behind her before she was ready to embrace a relationship with Trent.

  “What have I done?” She slowly sank to the floor. “What in the hell am I going to do?”

  Chapter 24

  The morning of the Golden Farms Horse Show, Rayne was adding the finishing touches to the tight braids arranged in Bob’s mane. Her fingers smarted from working the coarse horsehair into the decorative circles tied up with white yarn, but she was pleased with the results. Gliding her hand over his shimmering bay coat, she listened to the sound of other riders preparing their horses in the stalls surrounding her.

  Rebecca had transported Bob, along with the other horses competing, from Southland to the guest stables at Golden Farms the evening before. Located to the side of the main green and white barn, the large guest stables housed over a hundred horses for the show, with entrants coming from all over Texas.

  Rayne had done a good job avoiding Trent during the chaos of transporting horses the previous evening, and all the show prep that morning. He had been busy dealing with Selene and her dressage riders. Rebecca told her he had opted to oversee Selene’s activities, complaining that he was not comfortable with her abilities, while Rayne was left to supervise her beginner students who were entered in a few of the flat classes.

  Having stuck to the shadows whenever he appeared, Rayne had managed to avoid him. But when he was not looking, she would sneak peeks at him stamping in front of her stall as he went up and down the shed row checking on his riders. Every now and then, she would hear his voice and her stomach would shrink to the size of a pea. Sooner or later, Rayne knew they would have to confront each other; she just hoped that eventuality could be postponed for as long as humanly possible.

  While leading Bob from his stall to the post where her polished saddle and bridle were waiting, she saw Rebecca off to the side in a corner of the stables, waving angrily. When a figure across from Rebecca retreated from the shadows, she sighted Trent’s wide shoulders slouching forward, along with the nasty scowl on his face.

  Tugging on Bob’s lead rope, hoping to make him move faster down the aisle, Rayne wanted to run for cover when Trent spotted her. Instead of confronting his gaze, she lowered her head and pulled with all of her might on Bob’s lead rope, making the stubborn animal come to a grinding halt.

  “Shit, Bob, don’t do this to me.”

  “Rayne, get over here,” Rebecca’s masculine voice ordered. “We need to settle some things.”

  She smiled sheepishly and kept on pulling at Bob’s lead. “I have to get him ready.”

  “I’ll do it.” Rebecca marched down the barn aisle toward Rayne and wrenched the lead rope from her hands. “Talk to him. Do something, for Christ’s sake. I can’t have the two of you not speaking to each other in the middle of a show.” Rebecca pointed at Trent. “Go and fix this.”

  The color drained from Rayne’s face. “Please don’t ask me to—”

  “Go!” Rebecca yelled. “Or I’ll fire your ass.”

  Quickly pulling Bob away, Rebecca left Rayne in the middle of the aisle with nowhere to hide. When she finally looked up, Rayne saw Trent’s arresting eyes taking in every inch of her.

  “Son of a bitch,” she cursed under her breath as her dread dissolved into a spark of desire.

  Squeezing her hands together, she very slowly walked toward him. With every step, she could feel his eyes burning into her. When she stood before him, Rayne proudly raised her head. She could not let him know that this was killing her.

  “Trent.” She was thankful her voice did not crack under the pressure.

  He tipped his head to her, keeping the cruel scowl on his lips. “Rayne.”

  “I guess we should discuss how we plan on breaking up the schooling schedules with our students.” She unclasped her hands. “I have three kids in the flat classes in the afternoon, while at—”

  “That’s not what we need to talk about and you know it,” he grumbled, cutting her off.

  A thick silence formed between them, making Rayne wish she could be swallowed whole by the ground below her feet.

  “I know we didn’t end on the best of terms,” she began. “But I—”

  “End?” He angled closer. “What in the hell makes you thinks we have ended?”

  She took a step back from him. “I told you that I needed time to think.”

  He hurriedly closed the distance between them. “And I gave you time to think. But you need to know that I’m not going to let you go.”

  “It’s not your choice, is it, Trent? It’s mine.”

  “You’re mine,” he hissed under his breath.

  Rayne took two steps further back from him, her mouth slightly open. “You arrogant asshole. Where the hell do you get off, telling me—”

  “Drop it, Rayne.” He grasped her arms, his fingers squeezing into her flesh. “Why did you run away? You thought I slept with Lisa, didn’t you?”

  She shirked off his grip. “I know you didn’t sleep with her.”

  “Then why r
un out on me like that?”

  “Because….” She faltered, too afraid to tell him the truth about her misgivings.

  “Because why? And don’t lie to me. Tell me what it is and let’s work this out.”

  Work this out? His words hit like a battering ram against her heart. How could they work this out? For Rayne, they had seemed doomed from the start. “There’s nothing to work out,” she calmly insisted. “You’re a man who…needs a lot of women to feel satisfied, and I will never be enough for you. Don’t you see that?”

  He folded his arms over his chest and the thick muscles in his exposed forearms twitched. “No, I don’t.”

  “When I saw that woman in your living room, I wondered how many other women had been in your home before me. I knew then that I would never be enough for you.”

  “That is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.” The silliest grin etched its way across his lips. “Admit it, you’re afraid. Afraid of being with me because you think I’m going to turn into Foster.”

  “Well, aren’t you?”

  “No.” He uncrossed his arms. “Not every man is going to become your ex. We’re not all the same, despite what a lot of women believe.”

  She shook her head. “Well, I can’t take that chance.”

  “You’d better take that chance with me; otherwise you will be making a big mistake.”

  “I made a mistake once with a man, and my heart can’t afford to repeat it.” She turned away, showing him her profile. “In the future, please keep all conversations strictly limited to the lessons and the students.” Without another word, she walked away.

  Rebecca was tightening the girth around Bob’s belly when Rayne walked up to her.

  “So when’s the wedding?”

  “Why did you do that to me, Rebecca? You knew how I felt.”

  Rebecca patted Bob’s back. “That’s why I did it. Because you’re just too stubborn to admit that you want him—God forbid, even need him—in your life.”

  “I don’t need anybody,” Rayne fiercely defended, checking her fancy show bridle next to the post.

  “That’s where you’re wrong, Rayne. For someone who has taken so many chances in the show ring, don’t you think that perhaps it is time to take a chance outside of it?”

  Rayne wrestled the bridle from the post and walked over to Bob. “Last time I took a chance on a man….” She slipped the blue halter from around Bob’s ears. “You know what happened.” Easing the snaffle bit into Bob’s mouth she edged the bridle over his head, securing it behind his black-tipped ears.

  “He’s not Foster, Rayne.”

  “Yet.” She flipped the reins over Bob’s neck. “He’s not Foster, yet.”

  “So that’s it. You’re just going to let him walk away.”

  She clucked for Bob to move forward. “I have to go and warm him up before our class.”

  “I hope you and Bob are very happy together. Because that’s the only man I know you won’t chase away.”

  Reminded of her mother’s words, Rayne spun around to Rebecca. “I’m not chasing him away.”

  Rebecca took a few steps closer to her. “That is exactly what you’re doing.” She patted Bob’s sleek neck. “You need to stop comparing every man to Foster, and start living your life again. You deserve to be happy; even though you may not be convinced of that fact, you do deserve it.”

  “My father always said that to me, ‘you deserve to be happy,’ and then after he and Jaime died, I didn’t think I would ever be happy again. I hoped Foster could make me happy…you know, make me feel…whole again, but he never did. How do I know I won’t end up living the same kind of emptiness I had with Foster?”

  Rebecca lovingly placed one hand against Rayne’s cheek. “Because you love Trent, and you never really loved Foster, did you?”

  Rebecca’s words ripped into Rayne’s gut, spilling out the truth that she had for so long been too afraid to admit. “How…how did you know?”

  “I suspected from the beginning.” Rebecca offered a reassuring smile. “The way you spoke of him, especially when you first started riding at my stables, you never had love in your heart. You withdrew from him long before the divorce, and it wasn’t until Trent that I saw a part of you I had never seen before, the side of you in love. You never glowed with Foster, never blushed during your time together…you were always reserved, always calm. And I think with Trent, you’re absolutely terrified that another human being can have that kind of control over you.”

  Rayne nonchalantly shrugged. “I think you’re reading way too much into my relationship with the man.”

  “You know I’m right.”

  Rayne urged Bob along. “I have to get ready for the competition.”

  “I hope you’re ready for a showdown, Rayne.”

  “Bob’s ready.”

  “I wasn’t talking about that kind of showdown,” Rebecca objected with a grunt.

  After clearing the shade of the barn, Rayne led Bob out into the early morning sunshine. “Never mind her,” she mumbled to the horse. “We’ve got a blue ribbon to win.”

  But as she rode toward the warm up area, Rayne kept looking over her shoulder for Trent. Suddenly, she was terrified that what Rebecca had told her might actually be true.

  ***

  Atop Bob and decked out in her tight white jodhpurs, shiny black boots, black velvet riding hat, black jacket, and white, high collar shirt, Rayne memorized the course posted for her jumping class outside the show ring gate. Nervous butterflies danced in her belly as a competitor on a dapple-gray gelding took a turn over the fences.

  “You better keep off his neck when you’re clearing the water fence, otherwise he’ll tip the edge,” a smoky voice directed next to Bob.

  Over Bob’s right shoulder she saw Trent with a condescending sneer plastered on his face. “Remember to give him at least three full strides before that touch and go,” he added, gazing up at her.

  “Thanks for the tip.” She watched the leggy gray in the show ring knock down a pole on the blue and white double oxer fence.

  “You know I’m still your boss, and I want to make sure you win this.”

  “I realize that.” She kept her eyes on the ring, evading his devastating gaze.

  “So the least you could do is listen to me.”

  “What makes you think I’m not listening to you?”

  “Because you’re not looking at me.” He slapped her right boot, making Rayne’s eyes turn to him. “Take him slow through the course, and try to stay clean over the fences. You need a clear round to make the jump-off.”

  “I’m not an idiot, Trent. I know what I need to do.”

  He smirked at her. “Could have fooled me.”

  “Are you finished?”

  “No…win this class, otherwise I won’t show you my surprise.”

  Her heart skipped a beat. “What surprise?”

  A round of applause from the audience kept Rayne from getting an answer from him.

  “You’re up,” Trent clamored, and led Bob to the entrance of the show ring.

  She leaned forward in the saddle to him. “What surprise?”

  Entertained by her curiosity, his grin deepened. “Only if you win.” He patted Bob’s round rump. “Now get in there.”

  Rayne was glancing angrily back at him as she rode in the gate. She became so distracted by his promise of a surprise that she almost forgot which fence to jump first. Gathering up her reins, she straightened her back and took in a calming breath. Rayne reviewed the fences set up throughout the interior of the wide ring, going over the course in her head. She could hear the murmur of the crowd, and smell the aroma of dust and horses in the air. Somewhere in the distance a single horse whinnied, breaking into the stillness of the show ring.

  “All right, buddy, let’s rock.”

  Urging Bob into a canter, she deftly circled him around the front portion of the ring, making the customary courtesy circle expected of all competitors before starting the cours
e. When the first fence loomed before them, Rayne forgot all about Trent, Rebecca, Foster, and the world outside of that white fence railing. It was just her, and Bob, and all those jumps that mattered.

  They cleared the first hurdle resembling the green and white barn of the host stables, and then cantered on to the water jump. After taking three more fences, she looked ahead to the touch and go Trent had warned her of. Trent. She wanted to laugh at loud at his last minute coaching. She cleared the first part of the touch and go, let Bob’s feet just touch the ground, and encouraged him on to the very close second fence, not letting him take a stride. After clearing two more jumps, she spied the last one on the course; a big three-tiered monster that all the other horses had knocked down.

  “Last one, Bob. Let’s finish clean.”

  Bob’s pace quickened when he saw the last fence. She held the reins steady, curtailing his exuberance, wanting him to let loose right before the imposing hurdle so he could use his energy to jump up and over. Three long strides before the fence, she slacked up on the reins to give him his head, and Bob responded. He charged the last three strides to the fence, and just in the right spot he took to the air, forcing his body upward with his powerful hind end.

  Rayne always loved this feeling, the moment of flight when she and the horse were one over the jump. Making sure she did not put too much of her weight on his shoulders, she hugged the saddle with her knees as they descended over the other side of the wide fence. When his feet hit the ground, Rayne wanted to shout out loud. He had cleared the entire course, and they had the first clean round in the competition.

  Applause roared through the air as soon as they were over the last jump. Rayne patted Bob’s neck as they cantered to the ring entrance. Slowing him down, she performed the final customary exit circle to show the judge that she had complete control of the horse, and headed to the gate.