When He Returns

by Kimberly Rae Jordan

  Without the girls’ chatter, the drive back to the apartment building was a bit quieter. They talked about the plan for the driving lesson the next day as well as Sierra’s work schedule for the rest of the week.

  When they reached the apartment block, Sierra thanked him for the afternoon then headed into her apartment. Her time with Dalton had left her with some weird feelings and she couldn’t figure out if she wanted to mull them over or ignore them.

  Instead, she did a bit of both as she put a load of laundry in the washer. The thing she was having the hardest time wrapping her head around and accepting was the fact that Dalton didn’t appear to feel that they had been friends when they were teens. She’d always considered him a friend, the same way she’d thought of Danica and JD, although, admittedly she’d not been as close to him as she’d been with them.

  Still, it made her sad to think that what she’d assumed all those years ago was wrong. Hopefully he viewed her as a friend now, and since she’d always tried to live in the present instead of dwelling on the past, that was what she needed to focus on now.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  Dalton strummed angrily on the guitar, the chords discordant. Music was still eluding him. He could barely play the songs he’d played for years. Where music had once flowed so smoothly, unstoppable, it now felt like a dam had been built to stop its flow.

  He’d finally read over all his notebooks from Toronto, searching for inspiration, but still, nothing.

  Nothing.

  Nothing.

  Nothing.

  A wave of hopelessness swept over him. Without his music, he was nothing. Music was what had defined him for so long that to be without it felt as if he had been stripped of his identity.

  What if the music never came back?

  What if he never wrote another lyric?

  Who would he be if his name was never associated with another song?

  As anger joined the hopelessness he was experiencing, Dalton flopped back against the couch, the guitar clutched in his hands. It had brought him so much joy over the years, but now it was a bitter reminder of what had once been.

  Despair crept in, bringing with it an anxiety that he wanted to soothe the way he once had. He put the guitar on the couch beside him and sat forward, sliding his hands into his hair and gripping it.

  It was a good thing he was in Winnipeg and not Toronto because the temptation to call up old friends might have been more than he could handle. Of course, it was still possible that he could call up an old friend who had connections in Winnipeg.

  Dalton got up from the couch and began to pace the room. This was probably when he should call his counselor, but he wanted to prove to himself that he could handle this. That he could face down the temptation and win. That he didn’t need his hand held every time he was dealing with some anxiety.

  Breathing deeply in and out, he paced the room, bringing to mind all the coping mechanisms they’d taught him at the center. He needed to get this anxiety under control because his driving lesson with Sierra was set to take place in an hour, and he was determined that it would go well.

  He didn’t want to freak Sierra out the way he had Danica. For some reason, it was important that she see that he was trying hard to do his best. She’d said that as long as she could see he was taking the driving lesson seriously, she wasn’t worried. He was taking it seriously. So seriously, in fact, that he planned to buy a car soon.

  It would be something that tied him to Winnipeg, but if he did decide to make the move back to Toronto, he could give it to someone when he left. It wasn’t like there was a shortage of people who could benefit from a new car.

  In the meantime, though, he needed to get his head back into a positive space so that he could focus on his time with Sierra. She deserved that much since she was giving up part of her day off to help him.

  By the time Sierra knocked on his door an hour later, Dalton had showered and managed to put aside his earlier emotional turmoil. For the most part. Agitation mixed with worry still shifted beneath his skin.

  “Ready to go?” Sierra asked, her smile bright when he opened the door. She wore a pair of jean capris and a light purple T-shirt with Pediatrics: our patients are the cutest blocked out on the front of it in a fun font. Her hair was pulled back in a high ponytail.

  “I am,” Dalton said, giving her a quick smile. “If you are.”

  “I am, so let’s do this.” She stepped back and waited as he closed the door.

  As they walked side by side down the stairs, her arm brushed against his, and he got a whiff of a soft floral scent mixed with a little vanilla. “I’m surprised you still want to do this. I thought maybe Danica would talk you out of it.”

  Sierra laughed. “She did try, but once I’ve committed to something, I don’t usually back out without a good reason.”

  “And risking your life isn’t a good reason?” Dalton asked.

  “Oh please. They let fifteen-year-olds out on the road to drive. I’m pretty sure you’re more focused than they are.”

  “We can always hope.”

  “You okay?” Sierra asked.

  He glanced over and met her gaze briefly. Her sunny expression from a few minutes earlier had faded into concern, and Dalton found that he didn’t like being the cause of that facial shift. He wanted her to always be happy. In the time since he’d returned, the times she’d been without her smile were few and far between. That was the way it should be.

  “I’m fine, just not exactly confident after my last experience behind the wheel.”

  Her smile returned as she said, “Just put that out of your mind. This time around you’re going to do just fine.”

  “You sound like you have a plan,” Dalton said.

  “I do. I scoped out an area of Transcona that seems quieter. I’ll drive us over there, and then you can take over.”

  Dalton liked that she’d put some thought into what they were going to do. It did fill him with a bit more confidence that this time around would go better. Danica had just tossed him the keys and told him to drive. Clearly not the best plan of action.

  As they drove, Sierra chatted a bit more about where she was taking him and why she’d chosen that area. Dalton was surprised that as she spoke, his agitation was soothed away. He wasn’t sure if it was her voice, what she was saying, or just being with her, but he wasn’t going to question it. The less agitated he was going into the driving lesson, the better.

  As she’d promised, the area where she finally pulled over was devoid of traffic. She moved her seat back then got out of the car. Once they’d swapped seats, Dalton adjusted the seat and mirrors as Sierra directed him to.

  She had him try out the signals and made sure he knew the basics, which he did since he’d had to take the written test again. Still, he let her talk, not wanting to interrupt her when she was taking her role as driving instructor so seriously. It was definitely more seriously than Danica had taken the whole thing.

  Sierra’s car was smaller than Danica’s and obviously not as expensive. The trim showed signs of age and the seat covers were worn thin in spots. He appreciated that she wasn’t making any excuses for it. Clearly, it was what she felt comfortable spending her money on, and she felt no need to defend it. That still didn’t stop Dalton from wanting to take her to the nearest car dealership to buy them both cars.

  Within about ten minutes of making his way up and down the nearly deserted streets, Dalton was feeling a lot more confident. Sierra was giving directions well ahead of time, not waiting until the last minute to tell him to turn right and then screaming when he pretty much took the corner on two wheels.

  Her reassurances gave him confidence, but he knew better than to let himself get over-confident. It was just much more low-key than what he’d been through with Danica. He loved his sister to death, but he should have known better than to think she would be a good person to teach him how to drive.

  “I didn’t ask how long you wanted to spend on this lesson
,” Sierra said after about thirty minutes of driving around.

  “Do you have someplace you need to be?” Dalton asked. “I don’t want to keep you from something.”

  “Nope. Just a few things I need to finish up before bed since I work tomorrow.”

  Dalton glanced at the clock on her dashboard then over at her as they sat at a red like. “So another thirty minutes would be okay?”

  She gave him a broad smile. “That would be fine.”

  “Elliot and I were going to order pizza tonight. Are you interested in joining us?”

  “Sure. Pizza is usually my it’s been a bad day, and I need to eat my feelings go to, but it can be for a good day too.” She hesitated then said, “Are you waiting for any particular shade of green?”

  “Huh?” Before she could say anything to clarify, the car behind him honked, and Dalton realized the light had turned green. “Oh. Never mind. I was distracted by the idea of pizza.”

  “What are your favorite toppings?”

  “Just meat, or if I’m feeling in the mood for something healthier, I might throw on some tomatoes and peppers.”

  “Ewww…” Sierra said.

  “Is that for the meat, the tomatoes, peppers, or all three?”

  “Just the peppers. Although I don’t like all meats on my pizza. Usually, just bacon or ham, to be honest.”

  “No pepperoni?”

  “Nah. Not my thing.”

  “I guess you’ll be getting your very own pizza tonight.”

  “Lucky me,” Sierra said. “Now do you want me to drive back to the apartment or do you want to give it a whirl?”

  Dalton considered her question then said, “I’d like to give it a try.”

  “Sounds like a plan,” Sierra said, her voice not betraying any lack of confidence in his newly acquired driving abilities. “Take me back, Jack.”

  “Jack? Seriously?”

  “Take me home…hmmm…what guy’s name rhymes with home?”

  “I have no clue, but even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you. I have a feeling it would be all I’d hear whenever you wanted me to drive you home.”

  “You’re no fun. Doesn’t matter. I’m going to Google that when I get home.”

  “Of course you are.”

  “Google is my friend. Didn’t you know that?”

  “Might be your friend, but it’s certainly not mine,” Dalton muttered. It hadn’t taken him long to realize that Googling his name was a bad, bad move. If it wasn’t the speculations about his private life, it was the fan fiction involving him and his band members. He’d looked at that once and decided never again.

  “Yeah, Google isn’t a good place to search up your name,” Sierra agreed. “We quickly realized we needed to just stick to social media when looking up information on the band. Even that was sketchy at times.”

  “Some people have way too much time on their hands,” Dalton said. “And way too much interest in my life when they should be focusing on their own.”

  “Well, curiosity over entertainers’ lives is nothing new, to be honest. It’s just been made way too easy to speculate and investigate people now with the internet and social media.”

  “Don’t get me wrong. I appreciate our fans, but sometimes the more rabid ones would go a little too far.”

  “You helped create some of that, to be honest,” Sierra said. “You were so reclusive, revealing so little of your life, that it left people to make up their own ideas about you.”

  “I get that, but I can say now that I’m glad I did. The fact that no one has tracked me down here feels like a minor miracle.”

  “I’m sure it helps that you don’t look a whole lot like you did six months ago?”

  “You mean a skeleton with long hair?”

  “Something like that. A lot of your fans would be happy to see you like this though. They were concerned.”

  “I do appreciate that concern, as long as it doesn’t spill over into other weird and scary ways of showing that concern.”

  “Stalking, for example?” Sierra said.

  “For example.”

  “Did you guys travel with bodyguards?”

  “Yep. We had them around us most of the time. We were pretty recognizable in Toronto, and when we were out on tour, it was pretty crazy.”

  He still had nightmares about the first time a group of fans had surrounded them. He’d had a minor panic attack which had led to Jesse insisting that they needed protection. The management hadn’t balked too much at the extra expenditure of money, and why would they? The band had begun to rake in tons of money, so having anything bad happen to one of their members hadn’t been what they wanted.

  Of course, now they were faced with that exact scenario, and, with it, the likely demise of the band.

  Pushing aside those thoughts for another time, he focused on parking the car without hitting anyone else’s in the parking lot.

  “Well done,” Sierra said, her words laced with excitement.

  He turned to find her holding up her hand, and he couldn’t help but grin as he slapped it. “Thank you for your sane and calm directions.”

  “You’re welcome. Anytime. Well, anytime I’m not working.”

  They got out of the car and headed toward the entrance of the apartment building. “So you’re still up for some pizza?”

  “Yep.”

  “Tell me what you want so I can place the order. I figure we’ll eat around six or so.”

  Sierra thought for a minute then said, “Just cheese. Lots of cheese.”

  “That’s rather boring, but cheese it is.”

  She wagged her finger at him. “No mocking my choice. It’s my fav.”

  Dalton reached out and punched in the code on the back door, then pulled it open, holding it so Sierra could walk into the building ahead of him.

  “Hey, Sierra.” It was a man’s voice who greeted her, but it wasn’t Elliot or JD.

  “Hi, Marc. How’s it going?” she asked. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”

  Dalton looked over the man who stood talking to Sierra. He was tall with dark hair, and it was pretty obvious he spent plenty of time in the gym, although Dalton hadn’t ever run into him there.

  “I know. Now that the Bible study is on hiatus, I don’t see much of you guys.”

  “My weird hours don’t help much either,” she said. “So you’re doing okay?”

  “Doing really well, thanks.” Marc’s gaze moved past Sierra and landed on Dalton. “Hi there.”

  Sierra stepped to the side. “Marc, this is the youngest Callaghan. Dalton.” She tilted her head as her gaze met his. “This is Marc. He works for C&M and lives in the other one-bedroom.”

  “Hi, Marc.” Dalton held out his hand. “I’ve heard about you, so it’s nice to put a face to the name.”

  “Same.”

  The back door opened again, and this time it was Elliot who joined them.

  “Are we having a tenants’ meeting that I wasn’t aware of?” he asked. He wore casual work clothes and had his messenger bag slung over his shoulder.

  “Yeah, but it was about you, so now we’re going to have to wait until later,” Dalton said.

  “Ha.” Elliot reached out to punch Dalton in the arm. “Don’t give me a complex.”

  They started to laugh, then laughed even harder when Danica and JD walked in.

  “Do I even want to know?” Danica asked with an arched brow.

  “Tenants’ meeting,” Dalton said.

  “So why weren’t we invited?”

  “Because it was about you two and how unfair it is that you have the largest apartment,” Dalton told her.

  As he’d figured, his sister took a breath as if to respond, but JD laid a hand on her arm. “They’re joking.”

  She let her breath back out. “I knew that.”

  “Of course you did,” Dalton said.

  “If Sierra had said it, I might have believed her, but not you.”

  “Oh, I can see that you two are defini
tely siblings,” Marc commented.

  “I’m headed up,” Sierra said. “I need to get a few things done.”

  “I’ll walk you up and let the boys have their fun.”

  The two left them behind, and Dalton was sure Danica was quizzing Sierra on how he’d done driving. Normally that would annoy Dalton, but he wanted her to hear how well he’d done. It would serve her right.

  He talked a few more minutes with the other three guys before excusing himself as well. That seemed to be the sign for the group to disband since Elliot headed for his apartment when Dalton and JD headed for the stairs while Marc walked toward the back door.

  “We’re having some pizza in a bit,” Dalton said. “If you two want to join us.”

  “Thanks,” JD said, “but we’re just going to spend some time together this evening.”

  “I gotcha,” Dalton said with a grin. “If you change your mind, you know where to find us.”

  “We won’t, but thanks.”

  As soon as Dalton was in his apartment, he texted Elliot for his pizza order. Part of him felt a little guilty for not including Marc, but at least it appeared the guy was on his way out. That helped to assuage some of the guilt. Sooner or later, he should probably include him, but Dalton was still leery of any non-family member getting too close to him.

  After he had Elliot’s order and a recommendation for the best pizza place, Dalton called in their order. He took a few minutes to tidy up the apartment, putting away his guitar and notebooks, as well as the load of laundry he’d done earlier.

  That was something he’d had to get used to again. In Toronto, he’d had people who would come in to clean his apartment and do his laundry, so having to do those things for himself now was a good reminder of where he’d come from.

  It had been a few nights since they’d last gotten together to eat, so Dalton found he was looking forward to it. Elliot and Sierra were easy to be around, which was something he appreciated about them. Even his bandmates had driven him batty at times with their many issues, demands, and arguments. Of course, he had had his own issues, demands, and arguments.

  Dalton actually found that the two of them were easier to get along with than his own siblings. He just felt bad that Sierra had to work the next day since it was likely she wouldn’t stay past eight or so. There were times he wished that she didn’t have to work such long hours, but at the same time, he knew she loved what she did, so even though it might exhaust her, he wouldn’t dream of suggesting she should find another job.