Butterfly Boys

by Cameron James

  “I totally knew.” He whispered, Caleb laughed shaking his head as Luca reappeared, passing the lemonade to Enzo, and the beer to Caleb before drinking his own coke and taking a seat as a soloist came onto the stage.

  “To Enzo and Caleb?” Kieran suggested, lifting his beer, we all chorused back to him, making Enzo laughed as zie kissed Caleb, whispering to them as zie did.

  “You’re going to be in so much trouble on Thursday.” I whispered to Frankie, he laughed into my shoulder shaking his head.

  ❋

  Chapter Two

  I sat on a step outside of the club we’d ended up in next to Frankie as he refilled his vape. All the components spread out on his knees and mine. I had giggled childishly throughout his entire attempt at it as we were both reasonably tipsy after one too many shots. We were also ready to go home, officially, so, now, we were sat outside waiting for Skylar and Oakley to finish their drinks so that we could go home. I applauded happily when he successfully put his vape back together,

  “What flavour will it be?” I asked, Frankie hummed at me, as if he was unsure.

  “You tell me.” he said holding the vape to me, so I took it, placing it in my mouth and pressing the button, inhaling the sweet taste of strawberry. I sighed contently as I blew it back out. “Strawberry?” he whispered, I nodded as he took it back, “your favourite.” He said softly then inhaled some himself, smiling up at Oakley as he stepped through the door, followed by Skylar.

  We looped our arms around each other’s walking down Stanley Street until Oakley began to laugh.

  “What?” Skylar whispered to him as they continued to step in front of Oakley’s feet.

  “It’s like we’re going to see the Wizard.” Oakley whispered happily then began to skip. Skylar and Frankie joining in without much persuasion.

  “Stop, stop it’s making me need to pee more.” Frankie said laughing as we stepped out of gay town and starting following the road down to Oakley’s house.

  “How far Oakley?” I whispered as Frankie and I walked so our hips bumped.

  “Fifteen, minutes. Kind of.” He said thoughtfully as he began to try and copy how Skylar was walking.

  “Although now you’ve mentioned peeing.”

  “Oh no.” I whispered, Frankie looked at me, “if I only had a toilet.” I sang at Frankie making him giggle until he sighed and unlinked Skylar and me.

  “I give.” He said shaking his head and walking down the alley next to us until he found a doorway and disappeared into it.

  “It’s not a bad shout.” Oakley whispered as he too walked down the alley, so I looked at Skylar who shrugged.

  “He’s not wrong.”

  “Sky.” I moaned, they laughed as they followed Oakley, so I sighed and also did. Walking past Oakley and Skylar to Frankie as he stood refastening the braces of his dungarees.

  “Go on sweetheart, I’ll cover you.” He whispered, I bit my tongue, as he grinned back at me getting his vape back out and sucking on it as I stepped around him and hid myself into the corner.

  He passed me the vape as I turned back to him. I grinned as I took from it, then held his hand letting him lead me back out of the alley until we were walking behind Oakley and Skylar, as they walked through the streets.

  Oakley hopped up the front step, unlocking the door then turning and shushing us as he stepped in. He got halfway up the steps, as I closed the front door behind us.

  “You two okay in Rory’s room?” he whispered, I nodded as Frankie did, turning to look at me, grinning the slightest of grins.

  “You’re in with me.” he whispered to Skylar; they pulled their tongue back then chased Oakley up the stairs. Their giggles quiet but loud in the silence of the house so we followed them up, walking past Oakley’s bedroom to what was once Rory’s.

  His room was immaculate and I couldn’t work out if he’d left it that way when he’d moved out or whether Riley and Kieran had tidied it since. Most of his shelves where bare, a lot of the accents of the room were missing, presumably in the house he lived in now, but a photograph sat on his bedside table, of Rory and Alistair in their school uniforms looking thirteen, maybe fourteen.

  “They’ve known each other forever.” Frankie whispered as I sat back on the bed. He sat beside me then rubbed his forehead. “I’m far too sober for us to have just come from pride.” He said, I laughed nudging my shoulder against his, so he smiled up at me. “What happened after the drinks?” he asked, I frowned at him. “That’s so false. You know exactly what I’m talking about.” He said laughing as he intensified the sway.

  “What happened in the club?”

  “Oh that’s simple.” Frankie said nodding, “a guy was basically prowling me, and he was cute, so I let him.” he shrugged, “we had sex in the alleyway behind the club.”

  “Classy.” I said, he laughed. “Blowjob, from a girl…” I paused then grinned at him, “behind the porta-potties.”

  “Oh.” He said laughing as he began to unbuckle his braces. “Classy.” He teased then stood. I grinned watching as he changed for bed, him turning back to me with his eyebrows raised as I slipped off my shorts then pulled off my t-shirt stroking over it before throwing it off the bed and moving back so I was against the wall. Frankie getting in opposite me, still in his non-binary t-shirt and boxers. He smiled at me, so I smiled back, moving towards him and kissing his forehead.

  “Goodnight.” I whispered, he grinned then kissed my cheek.

  “Sweet dreams.”

  I lay scrolling through every one of my social medias two or three times, over and over in-between looking at Frankie as he continued to sleep on contently. I ran my fingers through his hair, twirling the longer strands of his blonde hair around my finger until my phone pinged telling me I’d been sent a message, at the same time Frankie’s did. I looked at his on the bedside table, almost frowning at it as I opened the message on my own, smiling at the snapchat from Oakley, of him and Skylar in his bed together, them both awake and using the dog filter. Skylar’s Dalmatian with their tongue out whilst Oakley laughed underneath the brown ears and snout. The caption read Post Pride with the little pride flag emoji so I swiped up on it. Typing out a message to Oakley,

  10:36am

  Oakley: If you’re awake you should come through. xx

  Sam: Frankie isn’t.

  Oakley: Wake him up �� xx

  Sam: Have you ever tried to wake up Frankie? I don’t have a death wish thank you very much.

  Oakley: :P xx

  I laughed out loud, shaking my head as I searched through my emojis looking for something to send back.

  “What’s so funny this early in the morning?” Frankie whispered, so I looked down at him then I grinned.

  “Good morning.” I whispered, he nodded back rubbing his eyes and moving his head so I was resting on my stomach. I stroked my fingers through his hair as I found the perfect emoji to reply back as Frankie reached for his phone, smiling as he opened the Snapchat from Oakley.

  “Should we go through?” he asked turning his head so he could look up at me. I nodded to him raising my hands as he sat up from me, getting off the bed and throwing my t-shirt back to me. I grinned as I followed him putting the shirt on, and leaving the room after him, but not getting very far as Frankie was crouched on the landing stroking one of Oakley’s cats.

  “Hey kitty.” He cooed as the cat butted his hand and rubbed themselves up against Frankie, purring contently as Frankie continued to stroke them until he looked up at me, he laughed once as he stood continuing to Oakley’s bedroom, the cat following at his heels.

  “We appeared to pick up a cat.” I said as Frankie sat at the bottom of Oakley’s bed, making Oakley laugh as the cat jumped up onto the bed. Stretching their entire body out then curling up on the duvet.

  “Sonic.” Oakley said amused as he scratched the back of Sonic’s head. “You know you shouldn’t be on the bed.” He said, Sonic yawned back at him so he laughed. “Spyro won’t like it if I let you on
the bed.” He said as he poked Sonic, until Skylar grabbed hold of his hand.

  “Stop.” they said laughing, Oakley grinned at them.

  “Wow, could it be any more obvious that you two shagged last night.” Frankie said raising his eyebrow at them, I laughed as I leant back against the wall, Skylar rolling his eyes as Oakley scoffed.

  “Shagged?” he repeated; Frankie nodded thoughtfully.

  “Boned?”

  “Made love?” I suggested; Frankie hit my knee as he laughed.

  “Did the frick-frack.” Frankie said, I laughed as Oakley shook his head in dismay.

  “Bonked.” I said,

  “Yes! Bonked.” Frankie stated, “you two totally bonked last night.” He said, his eyes widening in delight as Skylar laughed.

  “And?” they said simply, “didn’t you?” he added, I shook my head as Frankie laughed.

  “No.”

  “No, no.”

  “Definitely not. No.”

  “Sensitive subject that one Sky.” Oakley whispered, “yes we did have sex.” He added more to Frankie, then he shrugged, “and it was fun.”

  “Very fun.” Skylar said, as they looked underneath the duvet, they hummed searching around the room until they found their boxers. Stepping into them before getting out of Oakley’s bed. Sonic looking disgruntled at them for the disruption.

  “I take it you didn’t find anyone in the club?” I said, Oakley shook his head then looked up.

  “Why, did you guys?” he asked grinning as if he wanted us to spill some sort of big secret.

  “Frankie did.” I said, Frankie laughed in delight as he sat up closer to Oakley and shared the details of the night before with him.

  “I found Spyro.” Skylar said as they came back into Oakley’s room, Spyro at their side.

  “Out. You know you’re not allowed in the bedrooms.” Riley’s voice came before we saw him, Skylar turning and grinning at him as he got closer until he was ushering Spyro away. He pointed at Sonic almost instantly. Oakley shrugged back at him, so he sighed. “Breakfast?” he asked, we all nodded back to him, “and don’t forget you have a concert this afternoon.” He said to Oakley, his eyes widening almost instantly.

  “I’m going for, he forgot.” I said, Riley laughed as Skylar nodded.

  “I also forgot.” They moaned resting their head onto Oakley’s shoulder.

  “I’ll go and make some breakfast.” Riley said softly, coming into the bedroom and picking up Sonic, taking them downstairs with him.

  “What’s the concert for?” Frankie asked, Oakley shook his head.

  “We’re playing three pieces, part of the Pride vigil.” Skylar said, “I don’t even have my trumpet, I’m going to have to go home.”

  “Do you have any plans this afternoon?” Frankie asked, I shook my head.

  “Do you?”

  “I do not.” He said, then he grinned, “Want to go to the Pride Vigil?” he asked, I hummed.

  “I think I do.”

  Oakley had met Skylar in band, when they were both thirteen years old. A school band that held strenuous auditions and only let allegedly the best of the best in. They grew close quickly, Oakley the bass clarinettist and Skylar the trumpet player.

  When they left school after conflict with our head teacher regarding a nonbinary option of uniform, and both went onto a Beauty Therapy course they made it their mission to find another band, which they ultimately did and had been there for the last three years. They went on a Wednesday evening for two hours, although were usually gone for three as they frequently stopped for food afterwards.

  Never before, as they both played instruments they had to blow and I’d been told on countless occasions that one does not eat before blowing their trumpet.

  Frankie and I had tried our best to go to every one of Oakley and Skylar’s concerts and had on the whole succeeded during our time at university at least, so, we sat in the blistering sunshine on the fold out chairs that were set up around the bandstand both with an overly cold can listening to the big band version of Born that Way. The whole band looked as if they were enjoying themselves in their rainbow waistcoats and bowties as oppose to their normal black getup.

  “What do you think I could learn quick enough to be up there with them, in their rainbow waistcoats?”

  “The drums.” I said, Frankie hummed.

  “I’m not a drums person.”

  “Cymbals?” I suggested, he scoffed. “Triangle.”

  “Now we’re talking.” He said nodding, I laughed as he grinned lifting the can to me, so I knocked mine against his.

  “I could kill some chips.” I whispered, hearing Frankie’s laugh as he drank from his can.

  “Feeling hungover?” he asked, I sighed.

  “I hope not. It was a sorry drunk otherwise.” I said, he laughed softly.

  “Lots of vinegar?”

  “Lots of vinegar.” I agreed, as the band all lowered their instruments and stood as one. Bowing together and leaving the bandstand. We applauded with gusto, hollering them and cheering seeing as Oakley and Skylar laughed then disappeared off the bandstand. They came back around once they’d put their instruments in their cases, sitting on the floor beside Frankie and I as the service continued.

  “I love this.” Frankie whispered, lifting the shoulder of Skylar’s waistcoat. “Even though it’s polyester.” Frankie tutted; Skylar laughed as they rested their head back onto Frankie’s knees. Frankie’s fingers stroking through their hair, separating the blue from the green roots.

  “You should try wearing it.” Skylar whispered, “it’s like my own personal sauna.”

  “Tell me about it.” Frankie said in a sigh, “you don’t know personal sauna until you’re wearing a binder.” He murmured then turned to me. “Chips, then ice cream?” he said, I nodded.

  “Chips then ice cream.”

  ⦁

  “Oh, the lost boy returns.” Dad said as I leant on the front door hearing as it clicked shut. I sighed looking towards the living room as my Dad appeared through the door. “I was thinking about putting posters up.”

  “I told you I’d be out overnight.” I said as I put one foot on the stairs. Dad laughed.

  “You’re nineteen son.” He said then shook his head, “I’m not actually bothered.” He added amused. “Did you have a good night?”

  “It was fun.” I said as I continued up a few more of the stairs.

  “Did you end up with a girl?” he asked, I turned on the stairs, his eyebrows raised. “A boy.”

  “Dad.” I said laughing,

  “Anyone?”

  “I slept over at Oakley’s.” I said nodding, “with Frankie.”

  “Ah of course, Frankie.”

  “What’s that voice?” I said, Dad shook his head as he walked down the landing alongside the stairs as I walked up them.

  “You know you can bring Frankie back here.”

  “I am aware.” I said then stopped climbing the stairs. Dad laughed.

  “Even got condoms.”

  “And I’m out.” I said as I continued to the top. “I’m not… doing that with Frankie.”

  “Sure.” He said, I stopped at the top of the stairs and sighed. “But if you were. I’d be totally okay with it.” he said, I laughed as I leant my head back and sighed.

  Sexuality was really easy to my Dad, either you liked boys, girls, both or none, and whichever it was he was pretty much okay with it – as long as it was consensual and everybody involved was happy – I, one night when I was thirteen had whispered to him with some glee that I had a crush on one of the boys in my class, he was called Ben and he was a beautiful boy, with soft brown eyes and a freckly face.

  My Dad had laughed and told me I should ask him out, which of course, to thirteen year old Sam was the most disastrous of all the disastrous ideas, so instead I invited him over after school one night. Then another night, and another. He ended up being my first kiss, as we sat in my goal after a few rounds of penalties, and later
the first boy I slept with in the summer before college.

  I’d had some other conquests from that first kiss in the garden with Ben, other boys, some girls. Boyfriends, girlfriends. All of them had met Dad, and most of them had been liked and fully approved by Dad, and then I met Frankie. Dad wasn’t quiet on the fact that since I’d met Frankie, when I was sixteen, that the amount of people I brought home had decreased dramatically. He had wrongfully concluded that it was because Frankie and I were doing that for each other, and his suspicion had only grown when I moved in with Frankie for his first year of university. And it was obviously festering by the day.

  “I’d like to take this moment in the circle to thank Frankie for Saturday.” Enzo said as zie joined us in the circle.

  “I told you, I’m sorry.” Frankie said quickly shaking his head, “I was genuinely just taking the piss.”

  “Just so happened the piss was correct.” Riley said amused as he read through whatever he was holding, then he turned to Enzo. “I figure Caleb is fine?”

  “Yeah.” Enzo said nodding, “Emma…” their four year old daughter together, “is their entire world. They adore that little girl more than anything I’ve ever seen before. Caleb’s almost too excited about the idea of us having three littluns.”

  “You’re not excited?” Oakley asked, Enzo shrugged lightly.

  “I’m pregnant.” Zie said, “when I was pregnant with Emma, it wasn’t too bad. I figure as I’m enby it wasn’t as bad, but you’re enby…” he said to Riley who nodded.

  “Rory was harder than him.” he said nodding to Oakley who grinned back at him. “It’s like, you can prepare yourself for it, you know things like your stomach is going to grow and all that shit, but, when it starts happening it can effect dysphoria in many different ways.”

  “I don’t think I have dysphoria.” I said softly, Frankie looked at me first so I shrugged quickly. “I don’t.”

  “You don’t have to have dysphoria.” Skylar said, I turned to look at them. “At all. My Dad’s raised me they, I came out and I was they from the off, I’ve never felt an ounce of dysphoria but knew that they was right for me.” they shrugged then turned to Enzo. “Are you going to have a theybie?”